Almost Heaven: Tangled Webs
by Raeghann
Summary: For centuries the Guardians have protected humanity from the evil that walks the earth. One by one the Houses of the Guardians are falling, the Lost Lines of these Houses are awakening. The balance between good and evil is tipping precariously, only the Jameson's and the men they began training sixteen years ago can stop the darkness. AU
1. Chapter 1

_2002_

Frantically Ella fought to regain her breath as she leaned against the wall. She let herself slide to the floor, burying her face as she tightly curled into a ball. The fear that she'd been trying to outrun had only followed her. Something was wrong, so wrong and she couldn't have explained it, even if she tried.

She had the irrational thought that by just being in her presence it would allow the evil to find and harm those she loved. The fear twisted as painfully inside her chest as a sharp knife.

She could hear the moment everyone burst into the kitchen, their voices clambering to know if Nana had seen her. She took a deep breath to calm herself as the scent of dinner cooking filled her nose. The smell of barbecue drifted up from the kitchen. It was such a comforting smell; she tried to concentrate on that and push the fear from her mind. She uncurled a bit, feeling a little silly for letting the gypsy upset her so much. Taking another breath, she noticed an odd metallic scent under the aroma coming from the kitchen.

She got to her knees, one hand braced on the wall, as she heard a soft groan coming from the bathroom across the hall.

A dark shadow pooled under the door, a darkness that when she looked closer wasn't shadow after all. It was a puddle: thick, and dark, slowly inching its way toward her. The rich and coppery scent was very familiar. It hadn't been the first puddle of blood she'd seen. From training mishaps to broken Guardians dragged to her grandparent's home on the brink of death, it was a sight that was as common to her as milk and cookies to most kids her age.

Carefully she approached it, her hand going cautiously once again to her knife. The noise came again. It was a soft groan that ended in an odd choking sound.

She could see her hand shaking as she reached for the doorknob; her heartbeat was like a drum in her ears. Conscious thought had shut down, allowing her instincts and training to begin taking over. What would send most adults running for help had her coldly, clinically, assessing the situation.

Logically she knew nothing should've been able to get past the wards at the edges of their land let alone those on the house. Her instincts were screaming that something wasn't right, something incredibly dangerous lay beyond that door.

"Nana," Ella called. Her voice was calm-too calm-as she fought downthe terror she was feeling. "Nana, Grandda!"

She knew suddenly it was her uncle Rico in there; she didn't know how she knew it, but she did and he was alive. She couldn't know how much longer he would remain that way, but as long as his heart beat, she couldn't leave him. She heard an odd choking moan, one that told her she couldn't know how long he would stay that way, but she knew she didn't have time to run for help. It was up to her to try to save him.

The doorknob turned softly, opening into darkness where a lone candle flickered on the sink. Blood was puddled around Uncle Rico, who lay face down on the floor.

She prayed as she slowly pushed the door fully open.

"Our Father who art in heaven…" The Lord's Prayer had been Ella's safety blanket for all of her short life. She whispered it over and over as she moved to where she found a circle drawn on the floor.

A part of her registered the odd designs around the circle and the waxing crescent in its center, a star nestled into its curve. There was blood everywhere; it looked like a serious injury, but earlier that week Rico had frightened both Jessi and Ella near to death with red tinted Caro syrup. She knew only too well the smell of death and blood… still she couldn't help but grasp at the barest glimmer of hope that Rico was only trying to frighten her again.

"Uncle Rico, if you're trying to scare me again, you're so in for it," Ella said as she crouched down, her hand going automatically to his shoulder. "And Nana's going to be livid; you'll be cleaning this up with a bucket of water and a toothbrush."

He didn't respond. She shook him, but he only made the same whistling, choking sound. A low keening came from behind her and Ella whirled around as a dark shadow swirled past her. She noted that her breath came out in gasps of white, a sign of a malevolent spirit.

Uncle Rico grabbed at Ella's ankle bringing her attention back to him. He was fighting to wrap his hand around the handle of a knife that was made out of something white as he tugged at her. Everything in her was screaming to get out of there, but she couldn't leave her uncle.

Dimly Ella could hear the sound of feet pounding on the stairs as she grabbed Uncle Rico's shoulder and attempted to get a solid grip on him. She managed to roll him over before she saw the red streaming down his throat, his deathly white face, and his terror-filled eyes. Desperately he was fighting to tell her something, but the wound at his throat made it impossible for him to speak.

She watched him in horror as he reached toward her with the knife, animal-like sounds of terror issuing from her own throat. Her hands started to go involuntarily to her mouth and the blood on them had her letting out a scream. Ella's fight-or-flight instinct was kicking in and she knew there was no helping Rico and she didn't get out of the bathroom she would be next.

Rico's eyes were wheeling in terror, not for himself. The knowledge of impending death was in his eyes, the fear was for her. With the last of his strength, Rico pushed at her leg, his free hand gesturing for the doorway, urging her to get out of the bathroom.

Ella only managed a few small steps from the circle before the shadow reappeared. It positioned itself between her and the door, blocking her way with its cowled shape, the petite stature of it made it no less frightening. Looking at it was like trying to see someone shrouded in smoke making it nearly impossible to see any distinguishing features. The smoke shifted with the air offering only a momentary look at the person beyond the cowl.

For a moment Ella caught a glimpse of a lock of long curling hair that swung forward from under the hood. She found herself momentarily mesmerized by the dark auburn that idly reminded her of her own. As the creature shifted again, she could see the bone white shape of a delicately featured face and eyes that glowed red in the darkness.

A sharp burning across her shoulder, down her arm, and curling to the inner part of her elbow woke her from her trance like state, pulling her out of the spell of the thing before her. She looked down to find blood seeping through claw marks trailing down the arm of her shirt.

"Another child of Eleanor to kill. Another cursed Percy to destroy." The voice was like dried leaves skittering across concrete. The smokey shape made a noise caught somewhere between a hiss and a laugh. It was the most frightening sound Ella had ever heard, and she could see her death in those glowing red eyes.

Ella didn't scream; she knew the futility of it. Death was coming for her there was nothing she could do except pray as the sleeve of the cloak lifted. Ella trembled as she tried to face her death with the same bravery and dignity of her ancestors. The smoke shifted again, allowing a brief view of a white hand with red tipped nails before something the color of aged ivory flashed in the darkness. Ella blinked in surprise as the cowled creature retreated just a bit and hesitated warily just out of range of the bone colored knife.

An arm wrapped around her waist, snapping her from her frozen daze. Instinctively she attempted to stomp on the instep of her opponent, but whatever it was anticipated the attack and moved accordingly. Glancing back, she realized it was Dean that held her. Despite the dimness of the room she could see the determined jut of his jaw.

Quickly he assessed the situation, hesitating for only a moment before hauling her back into the circle and shifting Ella behind him. She fell to her knees, tears streaming down her face, her body trembling with the knowledge that she'd just come within inches of death.

In Dean's blood stained hands was the knife that Rico had been holding. The creature had withdrawn from it; it had hesitated at the sight of the seemingly simple knife. Something about the bit of bone made it move warily to the edge of the circle where it could go no further. They watched as it hissed in fury, pushing up against the edge of the chalk line. Dean dropped to his knees in front of her cupping her cheeks in his hands.

"Ella," he demanded, forcing her to look at him. "Are you alright, are you hurt?"

"I'm fine," she replied fighting for steadiness, her hands wrapping around his wrists, holding on to him desperately trying to pull herself together. "I'll be fine."

The darkness swirled around them as it focused on the knife in Dean's hand. He wrapped his free arm around her, tucking her head under his chin.

"It's alright, it'll be alright," he assured her. She nodded, but she wondered if he believed his own lie. They were trapped, none of their training so far had prepared for them for the threat before them.

It didn't stop Ella from cataloging the facts in hopes of finding something, anything. It'd become corporeal enough to scratch her, but could materialize like a spirit. She still had no idea how it'd even gotten through the wards, or what kind of circle was currently protecting them. The surrounding symbols were unlike anything she'd ever seen, either way it hadn't protected Rico well enough. The creature's head tilted as it lifted its nose, like a hound that had picked up a scent

"My fight isn't with you son of Du Lac, set down the knife, it's the House of Percy, the daughter of Eleanor that I want," the creature told Dean, its voice that same unnerving rasp. Ella looked to the bone knife still clenched in Dean's hand. He didn't drop it, instead he tightened his hold on it, and got carefully to his feet pulling Ella to hers, continuing to stand between her and the danger.

"If you want her, then your fight's with me, I won't let you hurt her," he returned, tightening his arm around her, holding the knife protectively in front of them both. More than anything Ella wanted to bury her face into his shoulder, to block out the sight of the terrifying figure and the bloody vision of her mutilated uncle. She fought to hold herself steady despite it.

The creature let out a bitter laugh gathering itself to attack, but the lights flicked on in a blinding flash stopping it. It keened furiously in a pitch high enough to leave only the mirror intact. Both Ella and Dean watched the cloaked shape swirl like smoke through the air and disappear into the reflective surface. An eerie flash of glowing eyes remained for a moment before they too slowly faded until the only evidence that remained was a small, feminine, bloody handprint left on the mirror.

Shivering, Ella looked to the doorway where she found her grandfather standing, his hand still on the light switch. He'd frozen at the sight of the body of his son and the blood that had transferred to both Dean and Ella. He instinctively snapped himself out of his shock and gestured for them to get out of the room. Neither of them needed much motivation.

Dean half led, half carried her from the room. She knew she was safe for now; bereavement and relief warred within her since the danger had passed.

Sobs shook her shoulders for the loss of her beloved uncle. Dean guided her into her room as her body began to shake from both sorrow and latent adrenaline.

Grief swept through her and she found herself wrapped in Dean's arms, her head tucked under his chin; only his arms were keeping her standing.

"Dean…" she whispered, the word catching in her throat and she could do no more than say his name.

"I know," he returned, holding her tighter. "I'm sorry Ella, I'm so sorry, he was a damn good Hunter."

"Why do we keep doing this?"

She was desperate in her demand. Nothing made sense, not Rico's death, not the attack, nothing. It only drove home how easily they could die, and for what? All her life she'd been told that it was for the greater good, that it was their duty to take out evil at any cost, to sacrifice anything necessary and she'd believed it whole heartedly. Now confronted with Rico's death and her own helplessness she couldn't help wondering if the cost was too high. Rico had been one of the best and nothing in his years of training had saved him. How could she hope to do better?

Surely the pact made between the Watchers, the Guardians, and God had been fulfilled by now. Hadn't enough blood been spilled over the centuries, hadn't enough of her family given their lives to forgive the sin of love?

"Because there's no one else," Dean replied softly. "Because we can't let evil win, we can't let the innocent die, and we can't stand by while there's something we can do."

There was a burning in her shoulder that had started out simply annoying her, but was quickly building into serious pain. Her arm was beginning to go numb in places while heat scorched through it in others. Looking down at her arm she saw the tears in her shirt, and the black streaks that were spreading from her torn skin.

"Dean, don't leave me," she begged urgently as her gaze flew from the wound to him, her eyes wide with fear. "Please, don't leave me."

"I won't Ella," he promised wrapping his arm tighter around her trying not to let the fear at the sight of those black lines following the path of her veins and what that meant show.

From the moment Ella's scream had echoed through the apartment, Jessi had been instantly awake. She'd taken only long enough to grab her dagger before she hit the floor at a dead run for her cousin's room. She raced into Ella's room to find her lying in bed tossing and turning, tears streaming from beneath her closed lids. It took Jessi only seconds before her sleep-fogged and slightly hung over mind realized Ella was only dreaming.

It had taken a few more minutes to comprehend that it wasn't just any dream. It was _the_ dream, the one that had haunted Ella for years after their Uncle Rico's death with glimpses of what had happened seven years ago.

Jessi forced her breathing to even as she crossed the room and plopped down in the chair near the window. The windows had been left cracked and the filmy white curtains danced in the cold winter breeze, filtering the early morning rays of sunlight randomly through the room.

The dream had haunted her cousin since that fateful night Rico had died. The horrors of what Ella had seen and the subsequent deaths in the family would've been enough for anyone, Guardian included, to have nightmares. Even after they'd been sent to live with their Aunt Ellen, Ella had struggled with the nightmares. After a few months they'd stopped coming as regularly. On occasion it would rear its ugly head, but for the most part they'd eventually faded away.

It had been six months since she'd gotten the call from Ella and had joined her in South Bend, Indiana. A few months after Jessi's return the dreams had come back. Not only had they come back, but instead of it starting and stopping with Rico's death and Ella's subsequent finding of him, they'd begun stretching earlier into the day, or later. She could only make a rough guess by what Ella said in her sleep. Either way they'd become far more intense than they had before and Jessi couldn't help but feel like that meant something.

Rubbing her arms against the chill she debated waking her cousin, but with the nightmares coming more frequently and Ella remembering more, it was becoming dangerous to wake her. More than likely she would react violently, leaving Jessi with no other choice than to fight to defend herself. It wouldn't have been a problem except lately Ella was so caught in the past that the training they'd once done was as fresh for her cousin as it had been the morning their lives had so drastically changed.

In her current state Jessi wasn't certain she had either the physical or emotional strength to take on a fight with Ella, at least not without one or both of them getting hurt. Part of her vibrated at the thought of a fight, at the opportunity to spar with Ella again, but she wouldn't risk it.

Caught in the memories of the past Ella's fight-or-flight instincts wouldn't allow her to be able to stop and Jessi could be forced to injure her cousin to end it.

Since there was no waking Ella without physically touching her, Jessi was forced to wait, something that went against her very nature. She plucked the sweater Ella had left on the chair in front of the windows slipping it on. She tried not to fidget, but watching her beloved cousin in pain was pure torture. The woman had been raised beside her; they'd been as close as twins for as long as Jessi could remember.

Jessi's powers of empathy were tugging at her, pulling her toward Ella's out-of-control emotions with the instinctive need to help. It took everything she had to pull herself back. No matter how desperately she wanted to help her cousin—until Ella understood that she wasn't dreaming, she was remembering—there was nothing Jessi could do.

Since she'd returned to South Bend nine months ago and taken the second bedroom in the apartment Ella was renting from Jem, she'd heard Ella's dreaming nearly every night. It weighed on both of them—it was no picnic for Jessi—but it was leaving Ella in emotional turmoil and utterly exhausted.

Once Ella finally quieted, Jessi slipped out of the bedroom, moved tiredly into the kitchen, and slammed a glass on the counter before hopping up next to it. She wasn't certain how much more she could take. Kneeling on the counter, she opened the cabinet above the fridge and took down the bottle of Johnny Walker she'd stashed there.

She bobbled the bottle, nearly dropping it as she heard Ella's voice once again. This time it wasn't a scream, she was speaking. Her voice, her inflection and tone told Jessi she was still in the clutches of the dream. Pouring a generous amount of the alcohol, she took the glass with her back into Ella's room.

"Dean," her cousin was begging, the pain sharp enough to wound Jessi's heart, while Ella's voice caught on the name.

"Why do we keep doing this?"

Ella's demand was despairing; it was a question Jessi had certainly asked herself often enough. It was something that at one point, if not many times, a Guardian asked no matter their devotion to the cause. The words _why me_ , and why do we keep fighting had at one time or another haunted every Guardian and Hunter that had ever lived.

At some a point everyone felt they'd never do enough to hold back the darkness, that no matter how hard you fought it wouldn't end. Eventually you picked yourself up and returned to what was the right thing, but Guardians and Hunters alike were not without doubt. Perhaps they'd just been born with an inordinate amount of stubborn stupidity because it never really seemed to stop them for long.

Jessi studied the woman sleeping in front of her as she fell silent, taking a drink as she noted Ella's fair skin that was ashen and sheened with sweat; her hair shined copper in the sunlight except where it stuck to her face. There were hollows in Ella's cheeks that hadn't been there nine months ago. After a moment Ella calmed and was peaceful, too peaceful. Jessi nearly dropped her glass at the unnatural stillness of her cousin and then Ella's breathing evened. A blush burned across Ella's pale cheeks. Jessi wondered what Ella was remembering, curious if it was about Dean.

Jessi hadn't heard his name from Ella since the night Uncle Rico had died since Nana had worked the spell to change Ella's will. Nana meant to bind Ella's powers and strip her of her will to hunt, but there was a price for that kind of magic. In her desperation her grandmother had toyed with forces she had no business playing with.

No matter how much any well-meaning person researched and carefully constructed the spell, there was always an unexpected price. In the end that price had jumbled the majority of Ella's memories, some it had erased completely and it'd wiped away so much of what had made Ella… well, Ella.

Everything about the summer Uncle Rico died—including the boys that had trained with them off and on for two years — had been wiped. Jem said it was because Ella would've wanted vengeance had she retained her memories, it would've been too strong to bend her will away from hunting.

It had rocked Jessi to hear Dean's name from Ella's lips. Jessi's memories were intertwined with the present and she was running away from both.

It hadn't been Ella's call alone that had brought her back; even briefly thinking of her other reasons made her gasp as a sharp pain stabbed into her heart leaving a nagging ache. Her college career couldn't be counted as anything other than a loss. She wasn't certain which bothered her more: that she'd failed—and she hated to fail—or what had sent her running to begin with.

Jessi sighed. The idea of being free from the family looking over her shoulder had been a large piece of her decision to go to Tulane after she'd been accepted. She'd been tired of trying to cover up the hunts that seemed to find her no matter how much she tried to ignore them and the more she tried to walk away the more dangerous it had become.

She'd had to accept that fate wasn't going to let her out of the game, no matter what Nana wanted, and contrary to what Nana believed, Jessi never looked for a hunt; from the moment she'd been banned she'd continued to train, but she'd never tried to go against the edict. She couldn't deny that when she got bored she on occasion looked for trouble, but it wasn't different from the mischief any bored human looked for. She hadn't gone looking for the kind of trouble that required a Guardian's knowledge since she'd been banned. The cost of getting caught was too high.

It was a death sentence, a decree that she was too dangerous to continue to live. Death itself didn't scare her, but leaving Ella alone to the whims of the family did, and nothing would ever keep her from protecting her cousin.

In the end she'd wound up missing too many classes as the darkness that was drawn to her blood found her over and over, forcing her to hunt to save herself and the innocents who couldn't understand what was after them.

College had turned into an impossible task, one that had left her feeling like Sisyphus, eternally pushing a boulder up a hill only to be forced to watch it roll down again and again, doomed forever to repeat the task.

She'd been thankful for Ella's call and the excuse to leave New Orleans. She looked at Ella, fearing there was a larger toll she was going to be forced to pay in walking away from a civilian life. There was the chance that she'd have to leave her cousin behind. Jessi blinked back tears of guilt and sorrow as she watched Ella tossing and turning.

Taking a sip of her bourbon, she reminded herself there was also a chance that she could return to hunting with Ella at her side. Granted, not like she wanted, but still working with her and actively in her life. After everything she'd lived through, she tended to be pessimistic. It was much easier to expect the worst and be pleasantly surprised when you didn't get kicked in the teeth. Dean's name whispered from Ella woke the hope that she might finally be remembering, a hope she was fighting to dim.

She took a deep, and a much needed fortifying drink before she set her glass on Ella's desk. Perhaps it was time to see what lay in Ella's memories. Jessi would need to understand how much her cousin was remembering. If there was any chance, those dreams would go beyond nightmares allowing Ella to once again know the whole truth, Jessi would do whatever it took to help it along and to get her cousin back, whole.


	2. Chapter 2

Taking a deep breath, Jessireached out and gently placed her fingers on Ella's temples. Seeing was a connection she only shared with Ella. She forced her body to relax and watch the past as if it were a tape, fighting not to be affected by seeing one of the worst days of her life in living color.

" _Sam got hurt protecting her from her own stupid mistakes," Dean replied, his gaze swinging back to Ella. Carefully he sat on the edge of the bed as another set of footsteps stopped in the doorway. This set she knew better than she knew Dean's. The older man in the doorway paused looking at Ella, worry etching his brow._

Jessi flinched at the memory. She'd overheard those words as she'd slipped out of Ella's room and down the hallway. She remembered arguing with Dean over the danger she'd put Sam in.

"Granda."

"Ella, a stὸr," the familiar Gaelic had her smiling. "Are you hurting? How are you feeling?"

"I'll be fine Granda, I promise," she replied, wanting instinctively to minimize his pain, seeing it clearly in his eyes.

"Your fever broke." There was a breathless note in his voice and the sudden light of hope in his eyes.

"A ghrá geal." The familiar Irish endearment slipped from Granda's lips. She forced a wan smile before she was forced to close her eyes at another wave of pain.

"Not even her darkness can dim your light…" Granda said as he brushed back her hair before taking a syringe and the bottle of pain medication from her nightstand and measuring out a dose.

The pain eased as the medicine hit her bloodstream. Her grandfather withdrew the syringe and dropped it into the trash can before handing her a vial of the foul looking liquid that she dimly recognized from the night before. Ella downed it, forcing it to stay down by sheer will. The taste definitely hadn't improved with age.

Dean handed her a Coke, the bubbly sweetness taking the edge off the taste of the concoction. She watched with a detachment created by the pain medication as her grandfather took another syringe and filled it with her blood.

"My son Jem got in early this morning. He can watch her if you want to go back into Sam's room. We're mixing more of the potion Carlos made for Ella last night for Sam. I think Ella's blood may be the key to healing him."

"I can sit with Ella for a few minutes more," Dean replied with a brief nod. "Come and get me before you give it to him."

Her grandfather nodded before he walked across the room and disappeared down the hall. Ella's gaze turned to Dean; her heart jumped at the worry in his eyes.

"Is the pain getting better?"

She gave him a brief nod as he sat on the bed near her hip. As he took her hand, she looked down at their intertwined fingers. Perhaps it was the medicine, or it could've been her very close brush with death, but she no longer cared about hiding her feelings. All the reasons she'd kept telling herself over and over again slipped away when she looked back up at him.

"Coke?" she asked softly, moving carefully into a sitting position. Her head spun pleasantly as he handed her the drink.

She took a few sips, watching him over the can and studying the planes of his face in the light. Her eyes drifted of their own accord down to his lips. She licked her own as she realized how much she wanted to kiss him. It was completely unlike her; she wasn't the type to make the first move, especially since she didn't have any experience.

The more she looked at him, the more she remembered the way he'd followed her the day before, protecting her despite the fact she'd told him she could take care of it. She recalled the kiss in the woods, the way it spun out lighting a fire in her she'd never felt. She remembered the feel of his hand in hers at the gypsy camp and the way he'd risked his own life to save her in the bathroom.

More importantly the memory of the way he'd held her when Carlos had been cleaning her wound, the intensity of his gaze and how upset he'd been by her pain, how he'd fought to keep her aware and alive. She could almost still feel his strong arms around her, comforting her after it was over.

Handing the can to Dean, she told herself that she could always blame it on the medicine, as he bent over her to place the Coke on her nightstand. Before he could sit back, she lifted her head and hesitantly touched her lips to his, he froze.

"I'm sorry," she whispered as she pulled back, her cheeks flaming with color at her misjudgment, her fingers went briefly to her lips lingering for a moment or two before coming to rest on Dean's chest. "I don't know what happened."

"Are you?"

Dean's question surprised her enough that she looked back up at him, the confusion plain on her face. Her heart was pounding in her ears with her embarrassment. He glanced down to where her hand still lay, causing her to pull away as if she'd been burned.

"I…" she stuttered. It seemed so easy in her head with her excuse ready. It occurred to her that Jessi would shrug this off much better than she did. She'd never live this down; he'd tease her for the rest of their lives. "The medicine…"

"The medicine made you do it?"

Peeking at him from under her lashes, she saw the amused look on his face and wanted to pull the covers over her head. In confusion she dropped her head to study the comforter rather than look at him as she mentally cursed herself for the stupidest idea ever. It was becoming difficult to keep track of when he was interested and when he wasn't. Just as she was wishing the floor would open up and swallow her he slipped his knuckle under her chin. The gentle pressure of his finger forced her head up and her eyes to meet his.

She could see the amusement still twinkling there, but she could also see something else: something deeper, something warmer in his gaze. His eyes dipped to her lips, causing her to lick them self-consciously before his hand slipped around to the back of her neck and his fingers twirled the hair at her nape. Each feeling was branded into her memory until his lips again met hers.

She responded instinctively. Her heart continued to pound and her skin warmed though not from a blush. Dean pulled back after a moment, his eyes closed, his breathing as ragged as if they'd just finished the training course outside.

"Ella," he murmured as he leaned his forehead against hers, his hand trailing down her neck and resting just under her collar bone. "You're hurt and you're not ready."

"I'll be fine, it'll be fine." She heard the words slip from her lips before she slid her good hand into his hair and pulled him back to her. She knew she'd never forget this: the surprisingly silky feel of his lips against hers, the heat of his mouth, his tongue dancing with hers.

The sunlight slipped over them both, warming them, but it was nothing compared to the warmth of his hands as they slid down her sides and fisted in her shirt, pulling her gently, but tightly against him. She couldn't catch her breath as his hands slid under the edge of the tank she'd slept in caressing her bare stomach.

She moaned in pain as her arm was jostled and he let go of her, dragged himself away. Her head was spinning and beginning to get fuzzy. After a moment Dean realized he was holding her up, He could see the glassiness of her eyes and how she was fighting to keep them open, forcing himself to take a deep breath he just held her.

"Go to sleep Ella. I'll still be here when you wake up," Dean told her, softly brushing her hair back from her face, gently kissing the top of her head.

"You're going to pretend this didn't happen again aren't you? Or you'll tease me until I want to shoot myself, at least until John gets here, and he kills us all." The dread readily apparent in her voice. "That is, if you don't just leave while I'm sleeping."

"I won't," he promised, unable to stop from cupping her cheek and kissing her again, letting himself get lost in the passion he'd been running from and the tenderness he'd denied. She'd almost died in the bathroom the day before, bringing him face to face with exactly how much he cared and what he'd almost lost. He couldn't lose her, he wouldn't, the very idea had his arm tightening around her as if he could keep her alive by holding her.

As he held on to her breathing in the scent of her shampoo and the spicy rose of the soap and lotion she used, he felt her arms loosen until they laid lightly across his shoulders. The medicine was taking full effect, carefully he lowered her to her pillows as if she were delicate, fragile, easily broken with even the slightest harsh touch.

"Get some sleep Ella, I won't leave you unless I have to check on Sam."

"Promise?" she breathed, unable to keep her eyes open anymore.

"I promise," he returned, but she was already asleep…

"Don't leave me, Dean," Jessi heard Ella whisper, leaving Jessi was reeling.

She'd known there'd been something going on between Dean and Ella, but she hadn't realized exactly how deep those emotions had gone. She remembered they'd gone deep enough that Dean had refused at first to leave when his father had come to take the boys after the attack.

Jessi had been young and grieving, she'd loved Rico as much as Ella, she'd been too wrapped up to realize exactly what happened and why. It made perfect sense now. Dean and John had nearly come to blows over leaving the farm, at the time she'd thought it was out of loyalty to the Jameson's and the need to protect all of them. Now she understood it was Ella and her cousin's emotions had ran just as deep as Dean's.

The changes in who Ella had been before the attack and who she'd become after suddenly made sense. What had been done for Ella's good—the greater good—was actually a terrible betrayal. Ella had lost some of the most precious pieces of her life, pieces that directly impacted the woman she'd become. The memory of her first love had been taken and that deceptively innocuous memory had changed things in Ella, things that reached deeply into her current life.

Jessi had been able to move on and grow up while Ella was emotionally stunted and worse; she was completely unaware of it. Jessi wasn't certain if there was anything that could be done to fix it; it was beyond the scope of her powers. It'd left a void in Ella's life, a hole that had left her burying herself. Those experiences that every teen went through, their first love and first heartbreak had been ended before she'd even known what had happened. By not being able to remember those moments of her life, it had left her confused and Ella never handled confusion well.

Jessi wasn't even certain Ella had ever had a boyfriend, let alone more than a handful of dates. In so many ways Ella had shut down completely after the night of their uncle's death. She hadn't been allowed to grieve as Jessi had because she didn't even know what happened.

Currently she was carrying the school load of a double major in both history and ancient language, with a minor in mythology. It made Jessi wonder how much of it was Ella's way of continuing to hide from herself. The only time Ella left her desk was to tend bar and there she was efficient enough to make decent tips, but she lacked the flash and charm that Jessi wielded like a weapon. There had been a passion that Jessi missed seeing in her cousin's eyes and in her actions.

Eventually Ella had acclimated to the trauma, and the nightmares had died away. They'd never fully faded but usually they only haunted her for a few days around the anniversary of Rico's death. It was March now. It had been more than six months since the seventh anniversary of his death had passed and the dreams weren't fading they were getting stronger, almost more urgent.

A slim hope gripped Jessi's heart, a hope that Ella was fighting against the spell Nana had worked. A hope that Jessi might be able to reclaim what had been taken from Ella. It was a slim chance but if there was one thing Jessi understood it was emotion and the power of it.

Jessi couldn't help wondering if the one person Ella couldn't remember, could be the key to unlocking those memories. If the man she'd loved as a boy could reach that piece of Ella that Jessi had never been able to free.

She'd call Dean, after all, he owed her a favor after that last hunt she'd saved his ass on.

There was a chance that Ella seeing her first and sadly, only love, might trigger something, anything. It was Jessi's last desperate hope, and hardly the stupidest thing she'd done in a long and storied career of stupid that danced playfully over the edge of insanity and back again. She often wondered if she'd slid over the side and was crazier than she was sane.

"Ella?" Jessi called, gently, breathing a sigh of relief as Ella woke shooting bolt upright in bed, sweat pasting her hair to her face and the tank top she'd slept in clinging damply to her, her eyes darting around the room as she realized it had been a dream. "Another nightmare?"

"Yeah." Ella's voice was soft and distracted as she wrapped her arms around herself, staring sightlessly at the wall across from her. Just like that the dream vanished like dew in the summer's sun. Every muscle in her body tense and vibrating with frustration, dregs of fear and sorrow making her heartache.

"You still can't remember what it's about?"

Ella didn't answer, but she didn't have to. As the sunlight played across her from the crack in the curtains, Jessi studied her cousin. Ella's muscles were rigid as she stared blindly into the sunshine. Glancing at Jessi she could see how haunted those vividly green eyes were.

Running a hand through her hair, Ella pushed her palm against her forehead, her eyes squeezing shut against the pain that Jessi could easily see swimming in her eyes.

"Every time I try, every time I try to push through I get only pieces before the headache takes over. How do I make them stop, Jessi? Maybe I should see the psychiatrist Charlotte recommended."

"I don't think that's what you need," Jessi replied a little too quickly. Ella looked at her cousin in confusion and was rewarded with a smile. Jessi only shrugged when her eyes narrowed before continuing. "I don't think you need a shrink; I think you need to give it time."

"How much more time do I give? Five times this week, Jessi, five times. I've been keeping track. I can't live like this. I just can't do it."

 _Six,_ Jessi thought to herself. It'd been six, but who was counting? Jessi shrugged nonchalantly. The "shrink", would actually be a witch, one that could very well suppress Ella's memories forever and then she'd never know what happened. She'd never have the chance to reclaim herself, to takeback all the pieces that had been removed. She wasn't certain which made her feel sicker.

Standing, Jessi moved to her cousin and ran her hand over her silky curls briefly. Ella simply stared at her, pain and frustration warring in her eyes.

"For now, let it go Ella. Don't make yourself sick. I'm certain just a little more time will fix it," Jessi assured her before striding across the hall and into her own room.

She closed her door carefully before she picked up her cell phone. She heard rustling coming from Ella's room; she knew Ella's habit was to get up, throw on some clothes, pull her hair up, and head down to the coffee shop within walking distance of the pub that they both worked at and lived above. She'd bring back a Café au lait with cinnamon and a fresh croissant for herself as well as a Mocha and cinnamon roll or apple fritter for Jessi.

The only deviation from her usual routine was a stop in the bathroom where Jessi could hear her fumbling through the medicines stocked in the mirrored cabinet. The headache must be already taking its toll; she heard the sound of pills against a bottle and running water before Ella's footsteps echoed down the hallway toward the door.

It would give Jessi time to call Dean and see if she could convince him to make a pit stop in South Bend. There were four things that Dean Winchester loved, his family, his car, whiskey, and women. The last two were all she could hope to provide, but she could provide it copiously. As a popular hangout for the firefighters that were off duty, the coed's flocked to Jameson's, he'd have plenty of girls to choose from.

Jessi peaked out her door and just as she'd predicted, Ella threw a scarf over her sweatshirt and grabbed a dark pair of sunglasses before she headed out the door, calling out a half-hearted parting as she went.

Ella was a creature of habit, a trait that had served her well when it'd come to training and hunting. It'd allowed her to make certain that each step had been as perfectly planned as was possible. Once it'd made Ella an incredible Guardian—well, that and her keen ability to think on her feet.

Jessi reminded herself there were still some of Ella's innate personality traits shining through, pieces that might be strong enough to break the spell. She wondered briefly if she should talk to her Uncle Jem. The thought was a fleeting one, it would probably be better to ask for forgiveness than permission.

Even if he wanted to give permission, he could be honor bound to deny her request. There was so much tied up in Ella's hunting, so much fear that had taken root in the family after the death of Rico. So Jessi would act on her own which if she were honest suited her right down to the ground…

Sliding the door closed again, she moved to her window to stare out of it as she dialed. She waited impatiently as it rang. Now that she had a direction she was determined to get the ball rolling as quickly as possible.

After a few rings she was rewarded with the husky, sleepy voice of Dean Winchester. His voice might've been sexy… if it had been anyone other than Dean.

"Morning sunshine," Jessi said cheerfully, knowing and fully enjoying how it would grate on Dean's nerves. She really just couldn't help herself. She had been needling him since they were children and it never failed to entertain her or brighten her mood.

"What do you want, Jessi?"

"I have need of a favor and seeing as you owe me one…"

"I don't owe you anything. You nearly getting Sam killed is a debt you can't repay, sweetheart," Dean retorted, cutting her off.

Jessi couldn't help flinching. She was still more raw than she wanted to be, especially where the younger Winchester was concerned. She should've expected Dean's response; he never failed to remind her of her stupidity. She supposed it was his right as much as messing with him was hers.

"Perhaps, but it was only nearly, and I did save your ass on that last hunt with the _rusalka_."

"And I already thanked you for that by not telling your family you were hunting."

"Look Dean, we can waste precious time here trading stories on how we've saved and endangered each other for days, but the fact is I need your help," She paused for a moment before she took a deep breath and plowed on. "With Ella."

"Ella's out of the game, Jessi," Dean replied, too quickly.

She could practically see him rub his hand over his face trying to wake up completely though she'd heard the interest and the awareness at the mention of her cousin.

"For now," Jessi agreed. "But Dean, she's been dreaming of that night. It's haunting her, andshe's not sleeping well. It's destroying her peace of mind. She's starting to become a shell of herself."

"She's always had nightmares that's nothing new," Dean argued.

"This is different, Dean. The dreams before have always centered on Rico, on finding him and the attack that followed. They've come and gone around the anniversary of his death, but that's in September, it's March. And that's not all that's different, the dream's changing, it isn't just about Rico, she's remembering pieces of what happened after, she's remembering more than Rico's death."

"What do you mean?"

Dean's voice was skeptical, but she'd could tell she'd further peaked his interest. She doubted that he'd continued to carrying a torch for Ella all these years, but Jessi hoped that what had been might be incentive enough to help, for old time's sake. After all your first love wasn't something you forgot very easily and however angry he'd been Dean wouldn't hold a grudge against Ella.

"This morning she called your name Dean."

"That doesn't mean anything," he said quickly. Jessi's eyes narrowed, his response had been a little too quick.

"She's calling for you, Dean; I can't help but think that means something. Maybe seeing you and talking with you might trigger something in her. I think she's managing to break down the freaking spell that Nana put on her."

"Is that even possible?"

"I don't know, but if anyone could do it, it would be Ella."

"You know she put a spell on all of us. We can't talk about anything leading up to, during, or after Rico's death, not to anyone that wasn't there and especially not to Ella," Dean reminded her. It was just one more thing on the continually growing list of things Nana had screwed up, but Jessi had also seen the loophole.

"We can't tell Ella anything she doesn't know herself," she amended. "The spell was specific. We can't directly speak about what Ella doesn't know while she can't remember. Once she wakes up that could change."

There was silence on the other end, but Dean didn't automatically say no, which meant she might have a chance to convince him. Quickly she continued on before he could come up with any arguments to counter with.

"It would be better if you didn't mention the past or that you know her; it would be too confusing."

"Obviously."

"Look she might not notice, but she still gets plenty of once overs, she's still as sweet as you remember so just spend a little time with her, talk with her, see if anything comes back. There have been worse ways you've spent a weekend."

Jessi winced at how close to pleading her voice had become, she couldn't help hating it, but for Ella she'd swallow her pride and beg. Hell, she'd grovel.

"You're desperate, this whole plan is desperate, and it's likely to fail." Dean sighed heavily on the other end. She could feel he was wavering, teetering on the edge of agreeing to help.

She felt a surge of relief; Jessi needed Dean to do this, she felt it in her bones that this could work.

"You're right, I'm desperate," Jessi agreed, her voice soft because just admitting that he was her last hope was so difficult. "I have no other options. If it doesn't work, then your trip won't be wasted. You're coming to South Bend Dean, home of Notre Dame, the land of the Catholic school girl. Think of the hot girls you could bamboozle on the side while you help me. Think of it as a working vacation."

"Really, that's your bribe?" Dean chuckled, but she could hear the intrigue in his voice, a chance to let loose while he helped her was more of an incentive than he'd admit. Especially since it would mean she knew him better than he liked to admit.

"Come on Dean admit it, it's a damn good one."


	3. Chapter 3

"Is there a better one? If there is tell me and I'll find something else to pull out of my sleeve, but we both know you've driven farther for a piece of ass," she retorted as she flipped back her curtain, picking Ella out of the other pedestrians walking down the street.

Ella looked so lost, so vulnerable. Why hadn't Jessi seen it earlier? God, she'd been behaving like a selfish twit; she'd been so worried about what had happened to herself that she hadn't seen how much of a toll everything had been taking on her cousin.

"Like you're any different Jessi."

"True, but then that's probably why we hate each other half the time. We're too much alike, so that makes us even."

"I don't know if any piece of ass is worth a trip down memory lane with Ella. Have you thought it might be better to let it go?"

"If it had gone away on its own I wouldn't be calling you, but it didn't, and I don't think it's going to. Besides, Dean, she's looking at taking over for Jem, running our library and helping coordinate hunts, which is something Nana will never agree to. She'd be too afraid of Ella finding something. Jem's promising he'll supervise her, but I doubt they'll let her. I need your help."

There was silence on the other end and for a moment Jessi was afraid he was going to turn her down, that it was more than he could take. She wouldn't have blamed him. She knew it was more than she should ask, but there really weren't any other options. For days she'd felt like there was an hourglass on her time with Ella and the grains were running out.

"Fine Jessi, I'll come. Give me the damn address of where to meet you."

Jessi gave an internal sigh of relief and relayed the information to him while she thanked every star that he'd relented. Part of her knew he'd do it no matter how difficult it was for him. He'd bitch, but when it came down to it he'd always come through for her

"What exactly do you want me to say or do?" Dean questioned irritably. He might be helping her, butit didn't mean he was the least bit happy with it.

Either way it didn't matter to her just as long as he was there. Besides, more than likely he'd forgive her when he got a load of the scantily clad coeds. There were plenty of them that were more than willing to go for a one-night stand.

"I just want you to strike up a conversation. I'm hoping seeing you and hearing your voice might help break down the last of the barriers blocking her memories. She deserves to be free from the chains locking up her mind, her memories, and the woman she was meant to be. She needs to be free to be whoever she wants to be, not this shell that Nana turned her into."

They both knew her cousin had been robbed; she couldn't remember the bruises she'd endured, the blood she'd bled, the knowledge she'd amassed, the incantations she'd memorized. Jessi, Grandda had always said, fought like a Viking Shield Maiden-retaining the blood of the warriors that had invaded Ireland and England. She fought with savage tunnel vision, dancing a vicious ballet until there was nothing left of her foe. Now Ella, Grandda had maintained, fought like Boudicca and Scathach, with grace and tactical brilliance.

If Nana had her way, Ella would never again feel the blood sing through her body as she fought evil, the way the light called out to extinguish the darkness. It haunted Jessi how she could feel it just under the surface, held in check by Nana's spell, leaving her as imprisoned and impotent as Samson had been at the hands of the Philistines.

"That is probably one of the only things you've ever said I can't argue with. I'll be there tonight. Lucky for you I'm actually not far out."

"Ha, ha. You're a funny guy Dean." she said, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "Oh and Dean? She's off limits."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean she's vulnerable. I wouldn't exactly call her naïve-she can handle her own—but there's a piece of her that remembers you. A piece that I think was half in love with you. You don't have relationships and she's the kind of girl that needs one. "

"Noted."

"But with all seriousness, thank you Dean."

"Don't mention it, and I mean that Jessi," he told her before hanging up the phone.

She rolled her eyes as she watched Ella coming back up the stairs with coffee and breakfast. She had a small, shiny window of hope. It might be practically minuscule, but it was there and even the tiniest amount of hope was better than none at all.

Jessi didn't say much as Ella handed off her breakfast, she was distracted. Distracted wasn't necessarily a good thing for Jessi, it meant she was planning something, that could be a dangerous thing. There was something about her dreams that had been setting Jessi on edge. She couldn't help wondering what it was as the bathroom door shut.

Heading into the kitchen she groaned under her breath. There wasn't a spot of the tabletop that could be seen. It was covered in mail and the books she had been looking for. There were two class books on the Crusades and two of the heavy tomes from her Uncle Jem's library on the actual history of the Crusades, along with a file she was helping Jem put together for a hunt. It was too close to chaos for Ella's comfort.

With a sigh she stacked the books and picked them up before lugging them into her room, now she could only research, guide. She could hear the water running in the bathroom as she passed by and slipped into her bedroom.

She was instantly slapped by the cold that she hadn't noticed before. Her curtains danced in the icy breeze, making her room feel like a subzero fridge. Despite the sunlight streaming through her windows there was a storm coming in and the temperatures were dropping. She set everything on her desk before she crossed to the windows to shut them and open the heating vent again.

She'd been so hot last night; her arm had ached and the scar she'd carried since she was fourteen had burned with fiery heat, leaving her sweating in pain and her skin feeling as if it was being seared from the inside out. Absently she traced the claw marks that curled down her arm and curved around her elbow.

According to Nana, it'd been given to her courtesy of a hellhound that had been stalking their lands at that time. There had been repercussions beyond more just the wound, her whole world had been blown apart. Everything taken away from her, everything her family had raised her to be was gone. The scars the hell hound had left behind had run deeper than her skin. By the time she'd recovered, both her grandfather and uncle had been dead. When she'd woken she'd found she no longer had the will to hunt.

Not only had it left her without the will,it had left her fractured memories. The last thing that wasn't hazy and confusing was when she'd woken up at the farm. She'd been achy, weak, and confused, but both her grandmother and Jessi had been overjoyed that she'd survived.

There had been a boy, hovering in the doorway of her room. He'd been nearly a man; if she'd had to guess he'd been about sixteen. He'd been good sized, well built, with sandy hair and soft hazel-green eyes, but she hadn't known him.

" _Who's that?"_ The words echoed in her mind as it had so many times since then.

It was a memory that she'd never been able to put away because he'd looked at her with such hurt and confusion after she'd asked the question. Her grandmother had hustled him out the door while Jessi had sat with her until Nana had returned to give her another shot for the pain. She'd fallen asleep to the sounds of Nana arguing with the boy; she hadn't been able to many out any of their words but heard the emotion, the fury in the boy's voice, and the defensiveness that was mixed into her grandmother's anger.

Hours later she'd woken at the rumble of an engine, some kind of classic car with the touch of a growl. The noise had drawn her from her bed to walk shakily toward the window to see the car. Her grandfather had adored everything about classic cars and she'd spent many a day with him while he'd tinkered with his own '68 Cougar, teaching her about it and other such vehicle.

As she'd used the window ledge to hold herself up, she'd seen the boy one last time. A large black car had parked in front of the house. A tall dark haired man had gotten out, but he'd kept the car between himself and the house. She'd had the distinct impression that it had been a good thing and had been done on purpose.

She hadn't been able to get the window open fast enough to hear what the man said, which left her struggling to understand what was happening before the boy walked into the front yard. He had an army duffle slung over his shoulder; tossing the bag into the back seat, he'd moved toward the front passenger's side door.

Curiously, he'd paused as if he could feel her watching him. His eyes had lifted directly to hers and he'd just looked at her, holding her gaze until the man had slapped the roof of the car twice, startling them both. The back passenger door shut, but she'd been too taken with the boy to see who had gotten in.

He hadn't looked back as he'd slid into the seat and shut the door. She hadn't seen him before or since, but the moment had been forever etched into her mind.

The memory had bothered her, returning to her mind again and again. She'd spent years analyzing it, trying to figure out why she couldn't put it away. She'd hurt a boy she didn't know and she didn't know why, nor had she ever been able to get an answer on why he'd been there in the first place.

The days following hadn't gotten any better. She couldn't remember the actual circumstances of her injury, but she'd been told she'd chased Jessi into the woods after an argument with their grandmother. They'd been cornered just off the Jameson lands and Ella had been attacked by a rogue hellhound. It had killed her grandfather and her Uncle Rico when they'd gone out to hunt it.

A hunting party had been called in; every available member of their family was called to the farm to deal with it. Her mother's demon compass hadn't shown there was a demon in range. Which meant there was no demon controlling the hellhound, something that almost never happened. They weren't allowed more than a certain distance from their masters, because a demon couldn't control them over too long a distance.

They were rabid, vicious creatures that had to be controlled carefully and were never let off their leashes. If the hellhounds were allowed that freedom they'd hunt anything evil and good alike. They were just as likely to turn on their master as humanity and they were hard to breed. They were too precious a commodity to risk allowing any freedom.

From time to time the old wound bothered her, aching and burning, making her feel as if she were in the middle of a bonfire, or perhaps the fires of hell were scorching her from the inside out. The last thought brought gooseflesh to her arms that had nothing to do with the cold **,** causing her to absently rub at them.

She remembered the Conclave's decision, following the incident, to ban both girls from hunting **.** Though why they felt the need to bother with the formality of it for her she'd never understood; she'd woken up without the drive to hunt anyway.

Staring out the window, Ella touched the cold glass as she watched the normal people going about their normal lives. She envied them. She was haunted by her uselessness in a war that they seemed to be steadily losing.

She couldn't count how many times she'd been told growing up that the Guardians were dying out; every single Guardian was desperately needed in the battle.She'd been left unable to hunt and a failure to her people, to her blood. Not only unable, but actually banned by the family.

It would've been so much easier if she'd been born to one of the normal people, to one of the ignorant humans instead of trapped between the two worlds. She knew too much and there was nothing she could do about it.

There had been nothing she could do about it, she reminded herself. She might be useless as a warrior, but that didn't mean she couldn't help fight the war.

In agitation she turned from the window and crossed to the books she'd set on her desk. She couldn't go into the field; she didn't fully have the instincts for it. If she tried, she would end up getting someone killed trying to protect her, and more than likely that person would be Jessi. But didn't mean there was nothing she could do. She was perfectly capable of helping from behind the lines.

She'd found a place where she would be useful by taking a position that hadn't been filled for ages. Once there had been enough Guardians that they hadn't all been warriors, there were still some today, though they were rare. Their numbers had dwindled so much nearly every Guardian born had enough fighting ability to be deadly, and they were desperately needed in the field. There was a role she could fill, a way to help.

In the distant past there had been Historians, Guardians that didn't have what it took in the field, or simply didn't want to be there. These individuals' talents were better suited to handling the administrative roles of the Guardian Families. Many of those would maintain the libraries, helping those in the field with the more obscure creatures or the lesser known options for the more common creatures that didn't follow the usual patterns, and documenting things with more detail than the warriors had the time for. They had the time and ability to search the journals of the Guardians that had come before to find how to efficiently handle a hunt. Beyond that there were so many things that could be streamlined, so much that she could do to coordinate the efforts of the Guardians, to send in Guardians that had the skills and were better suited to certain hunts.

At the moment it was a matter of who got there first, who could clean up the mess the fastest. She hoped to change that, to refocus the Guardians and their allies in order to utilize them and their skills to their most effective advantage. Maybe they could start rebuilding their numbers then, instead of continuing to dwindle down their forces with unnecessary loss of life.

Jessi was still adjusting to the idea; it wasn't what she'd always imagined. She'd always thought they would fight together, that they'd be the partners they'd been raised to be. It had caused an argument when she'd realized that Ella never intended to return to the field.

At that point, of course, Ella had planned on doing as Nana had pushed her to do: walk away from hunting all together and live normally. She'd believed it was all she could do. Without being able to fight, she was useless.

When Ella had finally admitted it to Jessi, it'd been one of the few times the girls had actually gone fisticuffs. The anger at Jessi—who was expecting her to try to fit into a life that she clearly wasn't suited for—had infuriated her enough to put Jessi on her ass. They hadn't spoken after that for two and half years.

Shifting the books to better accommodate the studying she had to do, she couldn't help the pang of regret for the years they'd lost and the time she'd wasted trying to blind herself to a life she couldn't forget. She'd finally realized after her first year of college that she was miserable. She desperately wanted to help in her family's war; she hated doing nothing. She'd lost the drive to actively hunt, but she'd never lost the drive to do what she could to use the talents she had for her family's benefit.

It'd been her cousin Sylvie, that had given her the idea. Sylvie wasn't cut out for the field, her talents ran to healing wounds rather than inflicting them. She'd found a way to help in the fight in a way that suited her and inspired Ella to find her own way to help. With her interest in history, her talents for languages, and her ability to retain information beyond that of most Guardians reviving the role of Historian had been almost obvious.

More than anything though, it'd given her a way to be the partner she'd always wanted to be for Jessi. She might not be able to be directly at her cousin's side, but she would be able to give her every advantage to safely take down whatever she came up against.

The first thing she'd done was to swallow her pride and call Jessi before she'd gone to Jem. Part of Ella had been terrified that Jessi wouldn't be able to forgive her, but it had thankfully proved to be a useless fear.

Jessi had immediately packed up and driven thirty hours straight to Ella. She had to have been hauling to get there in that amount of time, but it had been such a relief.

Ella hadn't realized until she'd seen Jessi step from her Jeep—her strawberry blonde hair flashing gold in the sunlight—how much worry she'd carried with her every day for her cousin. Ella had always felt that it was her job to protect Jessi; she was the one that was supposed to be watching her back. Without seeing Jessi to know she was safe, there had been a terror that had dogged her.

Her cousin's vivid blue eyes had brightened the moment she'd seen Ella, but she'd walked to where Ella had stood with a confident swagger that was just so Jessi. Things had been a little awkward at first but that evaporated quickly and it hadn't taken long before they picked up right where they left off. They could still finish each other's sentences, and sometimes they didn't even have to bother saying anything because each knew what the other was thinking already. For Ella it was like reattaching a limb that had been cut off. In the end they found that their only regret was for the time they'd let lapse between them when they'd fought.

For now, Jessi was learning that though she'd lost a piece of Ella she couldn't get back, a piece that she hated losing, she hadn't been completely deprived of her cousin. And yet there was a piece that—no matter how much it frustrated them both—was never back. Jessi had to accept what she could and couldn't have and make peace with it as much as Ella had to make peace with what she should've been and couldn't be.

She couldn't stop the wish for the child she'd been, the promising Guardian she couldn't even remember being. She wished she was as she'd been born, that she hadn't been so affected by Rico and her grandfather's death, for Jessi's fire and warrior's spirit.

She wished she was what Jessi and her parents had so desperately wanted her to be. It would be a wish that would always linger in her heart, but she couldn't let it control her or hinder her. Instead she was going to accept what was and move on with her life.

So she locked away that secret wish, just as she did every time it slipped out. She closed her eyes and took a breath, trying to lock away the sorrow and the tears to focus on what she could do and what she could be.

Once she was under control, she took a seat at her desk and set her alarm before reaching for the first book she needed to get started on.

Setting an alarm to remind her when it was time to get ready for work, she opened up the book she needed for the next day's class. She let her musings and theories go as she focused instead on the history her teacher expected her to know and the full history that her teacher knew nothing about.

"It's time to get ready for work," Jessi's voice sang out, pulling Ella from the dusty sands of Jerusalem and into the cold winter of Indiana. Glancing at the clock next to her elbow, Ella realized Jessi was right; her alarm was only minutes from going off.

Suspiciously she looked up to where her cousin was leaning in the doorway of her room, an impish grin on her face, one that never failed to make Ella wary.

"Since when do you tell _me_ it's time for work?" Ella demanded, laying her pen on her notepad and leaning back in her chair, stretching the muscles that had gone stiff during her intense studying. "Usually I'm forcing you downstairs for your shift with threats of dragging you by your hair."

"The firehouse should be here tonight. Frank Donahue said they had some new blood."

"Ah, the lure of beef cakes. Now it makes sense."

"You know, it wouldn't hurt you to make an effort tonight," Jessi exclaimed. Ella eyed her for a moment as she stretched and padded over to her closet.

"For men? Please. I'll have time to worry about men when I have my doctorate."

"You're in your junior year of college, Ella, how many more years before you get your doctorate?" Jessi cocked her head as she gave Ella an exasperated look. "You can be serious about school without being a nun. Besides, it wouldn't hurt to up your tips if you to loosen up a bit."

"Bite me Jessi." Dean suggested.

The pub was busy—not packed—but still doing very respectable business considering it was still early in the evening. Dean looked around, appreciating the way the Jameson's had hit the perfect blend of bar and restaurant. It held the charm he'd heard the bars in Ireland were known for. It was comfortable, a gathering place, the kind that saw every kind of celebration from births, to marriages, to a wake. It wasn't a place you couldn't take the whole family during the day and the early evening, but later the music got loud enough to shake the rafters and if those that sang along were off key from either drinking or lack of talent, no one seemed to mind.

The dark wood paneling gleamed richly under the shining brass fixtures while the cream colored walls contrasted with it, keeping the place from looking like a cave. The sounds of Irish pipes and the bodhrán played through the speakers at a volume that still allowed for conversation, while a cheery fire crackled from the stone fireplace in the center of the dining room. Tables and benches in the same wood as the paneling fanned out from the fireplace to the bar.

The bar itself was a wonder; it looked to be hand carved. The long mirrored wall behind the bar held a wide variety of bottles on its shelves while two gracefully carved figureheads flanked each side.

He found Jessi immediately behind it, the triple strand of beads that held her wine colored shirt to her shoulders flashing all the way to where they draped over the low cut neckline. Her burgundy and black pleated school girl skirt was relatively modest, while her knee high black boots made it appropriately naughty. If he hadn't known Jessi, he'd have hit on her faster than she could take her next breath.

Unfortunately, he did know Jessi and the thought was revolting—a feeling he knew would be reciprocated. He could appreciate her beauty: she was small and delicate in a way that brought out a protective streak in most men, and a smile that made them think of much more, but anything more than that was practically incestuous. He shook his head as she winked at the man that had been admiring the way her skirt had hiked up while she was reaching for a bottle on a higher shelf.

He turned his attention to the only other bartender working with Jessi, unable to help his interest in how Ella looked now. He'd never doubted that she'd be a looker; she'd started catching the eye of the local boys when he'd last seen her, not that she'd noticed.

Her hair had darkened from a rich copper to a dark auburn, though he could still see touches of the color he remembered it as glowing under the lights of the bar. Her skin was still soft cream, her face heart shaped, her high cheekbones were more defined now. She still had the old fashioned beauty she'd had at fourteen, the kind that didn't fade even into old age.

What surprised him was how she'd filled out. She'd been delicate and willowy when he'd last seen her. That slim build had given way to an hourglass figure with curves that reminded him of one of the sexy pin up girls that men still ogled forty years later. He continued to watch Ella move as gracefully as a dancer from behind the bar, filling orders efficiently. The girls weaved around each other without disrupting the other's rhythm. He remembered the warm sweet girl he'd known and tried to reconcile her with the cool distant woman he saw now. He was no less interested for her reserve; instead it was a challenge and one he could see he wasn't alone in wanting to win.


	4. Chapter 4

At that moment Ella was engrossed in her work, or at least attempting to look as if she were engrossed. Anything to avoid the gaze of the rich little college boy she was currently shaking a martini for. Her face was carefully neutral, a soft smile playing at the corners of her mouth as she berated the self-satisfied prick that would come into Notre Dame's favored Irish pub and order a martini. It wasn't that she wasn't able to make a damn fine martini, nor that it was particularly difficult, but that Jameson's wasn't really a martini sort of place. You went to a pub for a couple pints, a few drams, a Car Bomb or two, tasty and filling food, or to lift both your glass as well as your voice to some traditional Irish music.

Of course it didn't help that he was a smug little bastard that was handsome as sin—obviously a trust fund baby—and used to getting whatever he wanted whenever he wanted it. Not that she could judge him for having a trust fund; after all she had one of her own, but it was the way he obviously lavishly spent it that she couldn't stomach.

She'd been raised understanding that she needed to take care in spending, to invest wisely and be certain that she could leave money for the next generation. Being a Guardian was an expensive, thankless business that didn't allow for any stable or steady job. The days of being rewarded with kingdoms and riches for their work were long gone, but the wealth had never been taken for granted by the Jameson's. It'd served them well. There were plenty of Houses that had fallen to ruin because they had chosen to spend like the boy she was serving.

It didn't help that he had the mistaken notion that since she was tending bar she was both scraping to get by and susceptible to the lure of his money. She'd been born with too much pride. It was both a blessing and a curse; there was nothing she wanted more than to pour the martini over his head.

It was at that moment, when she was outwardly giving the little ass a sweet smile while internally berating him, that she saw the unfamiliar man. He stood out of the way of the bustling servers, staring at the bar and taking everything in, a smirk playing on his lips.

Following his gaze, she realized the smirk was for Jessi, though oddly it didn't seem to have an ounce of interest in it. She had the distinct impression it was more appreciation for a fellow showman. Shaking her head, she pushed that thought away. There wasn't a male alive that could resist Jessamyn Jameson. It was a physiological impossibility. A man had to be… well she'd say dead, but her cousin tended to be vampire fly paper, so at rest was a more apt description.

Grabbing a rarely used martini glass, she poured the drink for the frat boy while continuing to glance at the man. His hair flashed from honey brown to a darker, richer color in the lights as he strode confidently to the bar. He had a firm jaw, knowing eyes, and a pair of lips that even Ella couldn't help noticing begged to be kissed. Interestingly, he took a seat in no man's land, an area that would let either of the girls serve him. It would just depend on who was free first.

The bulky, well-worn brown leather jacket, Henley, and flannel shirt told her he could be a construction worker. His hands were rough and scarred, telling her whatever he did was a physical job. He shrugged out of the coat and hung it on the back of the bar stool leaning forward a bit to look at the collection of bottles behind the bar. As she admired the way his muscles rippled and stretched under the cloth of his shirt, she noticed the telltale bulge at the back of his hip as his shirt pulled just a little around it.

Most people would've missed it, but she was familiar with those that carried. Not only was the Pub a regular hangout for the 'Fighting Irish', the local fire department and the police were also regulars.

It helped with the true family business when you owned the bar where the police had been congregating for the past four generations of the Jameson family. It had always given them a few well-placed police officers that knew about what liked to come out and play in the dark.

Jem had a handful of officers that had helped protect the family for years to let them keep doing the job that the police didn't have the time or ability to take care of. After all, it wasn't as if there weren't enough run-of-the-mill human crimes to deal with without having to handle the supernatural ones too. They were more than happy to leave that up to Jem's discretion.

The man couldn't be an undercover cop; criminals would be able to spot his piece as well as she could and a criminal wouldn't likely carry in a bar known to be frequented regularly by cops. It wasn't overtly obvious, but for those looking, they'd see his gun.

No, she'd bet ten to one this was another Guardian, or more likely, a Hunter, which was an unusual thing. Since this was Jem's territory it was rare to see an unknown passing through the city, let alone the pub. She made a mental note to tell her uncle about the man and continued to glance at him, telling herself it was because she'd need a good description to pass on.

He looked up to catch her gaze and held it a slow arrogant smile slipping across his face telling her he'd felt her seizing him up. Instead of looking away she continued to meet him stare for stare. She'd found most men weren't sure what to do with a woman that met their eye directly. It made them uncomfortable and had them looking away from her first, giving her the upper hand before they even realized she had it. It was a trick she'd found and perfected when she'd first started working at Jameson's.

His smile widened charmingly before he finally dropped his eyes, though she could see plainly it wasn't because he was in any way intimidated. Instead his gaze traveled down her body with such an obvious interest that he turned the tables on her. It irked her to know that the upper hand had gone to him, and she turned her attention momentarily to the drink she was trying to garnish. Desperately she wished she could control the blush she could feel warming her cheeks.

When she stole another look at the stranger she found he was still watching her. He grinned, obviously amused that she hadn't been able to resist looking at him again. There was something about him, something in the way he held himself and his smile that tugged at her. He seemed so familiar, though she'd never met him before.

" _Ella, you're hurt and you're not ready."_ The voice echoed in her head, making her close her eyes for a moment with the stabbing pain that shot through her temple.

"Are you okay?" she dimly heard the college boy ask as her hand flew to her temple and her eyes snapped shut against the pain. Just as quickly as the vision had come it was gone, leaving her fumbling to remember it. She took a moment before she cautiously blinked, expecting the light to add to the pain, but it was gone as quickly as it had come.

"Yeah, fine," she replied, unable to keep from glancing back up at the stranger. He was still watching her, the interest and teasing replaced by an uncomfortable scrutiny.

"Here," the boy said, pulling her attention to him. She was almost grateful. Until, of course, he pulled out his wallet and placed a hundred on the bar top. His smile gleamed as brightly as a toothpaste commercial, his regard causing an unease to unfurl in her stomach. There was something about him, something she couldn't place. His gold Rolex flashed in the light at a practiced flick of his wrist, obviously trying to bring her gaze to it, apparently he thought it would impress her, all it did was aggravate her further.

"Don't worry about it, it's on the house," Ella said shortly, but he didn't seem to hear the irritation. She was on the verge of finally losing her temper when she noticed Jessi at the beer taps. Her cousin smiled at the stranger, talking to him as she began building a Guinness. A stab of disappointment and jealousy confused her; she wasn't used to either of those feelings when it came to the opposite sex.

It was probably for the best, she told herself. Jessi would be able to handle him better than she ever could. It would be like playing with fire and whatever was drawing her to the man was probably better left unexplored.

"Ella, love, another round for the boys," Frank Donahue called from a few seats down the bar. She smiled at the fire chief and gave him a nod before turning her attention back to the customers that actually needed her.

"I was beginning to wonder if you were going to show," Jessi declared as she paused in pouring a Guinness, letting it settle.

"Nice to see you too, Jessi," Dean said, giving her a grin. She rolled her eyes as she finished building the drink and served it before she returned to him. She watched him look at Ella, and a flash of something unusual cross her cousin's eyes before she turned back to the overly polished pretty boy she'd been serving. Had that been jealousy? In Ella? It was unheard of.

"I'm sure it is," Jessi replied as she poured two fingers of Tullamore Dew and slid it down the bar to one of the rookie firemen she'd been flirting with all night. His taste in good Irish whiskey only made him more interesting.

"So where do I start?"

"Strike up a conversation. That shouldn't be too hard for you," Jessi said, giving him a wide grin with a challenging gleam in her eyes. "On second thought it might be. Ella's more interested in her books than guys, so there's a good chance you'll strike out champ."

"Doesn't seem like the guy down there's having too much trouble."

Jessi followed Dean's gaze to the pretty boy that had his hand wrapped around Ella's. She saw Ella try to pull her hand away and the boy hold it down. Her cousin snapped at him, but he still didn't release her.

Jessi wasn't certain whether to be impressed at the boy's balls or pissed because she knew well that Ella didn't particularly like being touched by anyone that wasn't either directly—or that might as well be—related.

Ella looked from the boy's hand to his face as she tried to pull away again, but he didn't budge. Glaring at him and trying to control her temper, she raised an eyebrow as anger flashed in her eyes. She debated for a moment which would be more satisfying: blackening the kid's eye or hitting him square in the nose.

"Braedan," He said arrogantly, as if telling her his name might somehow make it alright that he was touching her without permission.

"Great to meet you, Braedan. Enjoy yourself, but I have another customer…"

"Come on, what's your name?"

"Ella." Her voice was short as she continued to fight her temper. The idea of blood spurting from his nose was so appealing, though it wasn't at all like her. She could handle blood, but she didn't usually want to be the cause of it. Gently Braedan rubbed his thumb over the back of her hand.

"Thank you, Ella, this is a fantastic martini," he continued. There was a warmth from his hand, one that was making her uncomfortable, warm, edgy. Oddly it soothed her temper, beginning to turn it to amusement and interest. He was actually pretty good looking, she realized. His golden boy looks were almost angelic.

"At Jameson's we aim to please." Her voice softened and she offered him a real smile.

"Here." Braedan handed her a thick fold of bills. "You work too hard; you should enjoy yourself."

"It's alright, I'm set."

Just when she thought he might have some redeeming qualities, he ruined it. He just offered her another smile and left the money on the bar.

She wasn't for sale, even if she'd been a struggling student trying to make ends meet she'd have turned him down, it wasn't worth the tip. Tilting her head, she was sorely tempted to tell him her family could probably buy and sell his six times over. She could feel Jessi's and the stranger eyeing her, with a sweet smile she toed an empty glass rack over and stood leaning on her elbows only inches from the boy's face. Taking the money from the bar she lifted her lips until they were a breath from his.

"Keep it," she told him coldly, stuffing the money into the pocket on his shirt, before she whirled away.

Jessi glanced at Dean who smiled in amusement, as the boy was stupid enough to open his mouth taking pity on him Jessi beat him to it.

"Ella, can you get the middle? I'm swamped," Jessi said biting back a laugh. "I greeted him, but I haven't had a chance to actually take his order."

As per usual there were one too many men vying for her cousin's attention at the moment, and she rolled her eyes in response.

"Sure, Jessi."

The further the easier Ella felt, there was just something about him. Something that made her uneasy; it unnerved her that when he had touched her for a moment everything her gut had been telling her faded away. Pausing to look back at him, she watched as he joined a group of frat boys at a table just as their waitress, Jenny, arrived.

He took a drink, his eyes maintaining contact over the rim of the glass, then lifted it in a toast to her. She looked away turning back to the task at hand. She'd have to tell Sean, the bouncer on tonight, to keep an eye out for the group.

More than likely he was just another spoiled handsy rich kid who thought money actually bought him the world. Unfortunately, where there was one in a group, it was pretty likely there would be more. She didn't envy Jenny, even if she might make fabulous tips. To be on the safe side, she'd have Sean walk the waitress out to her car tonight.

The stranger watched as she approached him. Perhaps Jessi was right; maybe she needed to loosen up. It wasn't like she hadn't ever flirted, just that generally she had more important things on her mind. What was the harm? Even if she made a fool of herself, she'd probably never see him again after tonight anyway.

"Hey sailor, what's your poison?" Ella asked, giving the man a smile, she hoped like the coy ones that seemed to be always on hand for her cousin. Ella missed Jessi's double take, or her nearly bobbling the drink she was serving that would've told Ella she'd nailed it.

Dean had been prepared for the question, dropping his gaze thoughtfully, before looking up at her again. There was a gleam in his eye and a charming smile on his face that never failed. He was well versed in the game Ella had started, in all honesty from the moment he'd noticed her looking at him, but Dean found all his skills slipping away when he looked at her directly.

He lost himself in those vivid green cat eyes the color of spring leaves, touched with a softer sea green that hadn't changed a bit. They captivated him just as much they had first time he'd met her at twelve, as they did now. Her hair curled around her delicate features and high cheekbones, and there was a lot more of Jessi's fairy-like features in Ella's face than he remembered. Her skin was fair and so soft looking in the dimly lit room, her eyes standing out against her smoky eye makeup. The smell of her perfume wrapped around him, something soft and floral with just a touch of spice, a scent guaranteed to drive a man crazy, though that wasn't why she wore it.

Unlike Jessi, who knew and enjoyed how much she drove men crazy, Ella was an innocent. Dean could see it in her eyes, despite the interest that glimmered there. He could see it in the way her hand fluttered above the bar for only a few seconds only to return. Everything about Ella that attracted wasn't planned to gain attention or entice men. Even her flirting, while effective, looked like another skin she'd stepped into and wasn't entirely comfortable with. Granted it wasn't something that would be noticed by the average man, but he'd been trained to read people, to see what others didn't want him to. Damn it, to his own surprise, he found himself wanting her more for it.

He shook his head reminding himself—as he glanced at Ella again—that he was here to trigger her memories, not get caught up in the memories of the feelings that he'd long ago discarded **.** After all **,** she wasn't his type. In fact, she was the type he took great pains to avoid, the kind that wasn't interested in harmless fun, the kind that even if they convinced themselves they were would end up too attached.

His eyes fell to her lips, unable to help himself from finding them soft and glossy, an invitation to kiss. Memories of the kisses slipped through his mind even as he tried to push them away. It was something he'd always remembered it fondly, but now looking at the adult version of that girl, he tried to forget how it'd left him reeling. It certainly hadn't been his first kiss; he'd been sixteen and already hit all the firsts that one could experience with the opposite sex. However, it had been the first time his heart had been involved with the object of his desire.

No one had ever affected him like Ella, no other girl had come close; his heart had nearly pounded out of his chest. He couldn't help wondering if it'd feel the same way if he kissed her again. He'd never wanted anyone as much as he had her, not before and unfortunately never since.

Part of him had always wondered what would've happened if John hadn't taken them away, if Rico hadn't died and they'd had a couple more years together. He'd let his emotions be controlled by his lust; emotion clouded the senses and confused logic, he reminded himself.

He'd failed his family because of it. He'd been so worried about some girl he barely knew instead of protecting his little brother and Sam had almost died because of it. It was an important lesson, one that had cost him years before his father really trusted him again, and John Winchester had been right. Twice he'd lost his focus and his brother had almost died both those times. Family came first; it had to be first. Sammy was the only thing he should've been focused on protecting. It was a mistake he'd never made again.

Ella raised an eyebrow, giving him a slow sexy smile and tilting her head questioningly.

"Do you need a minute?"

"What's good?" He finally managed,the words barely getting past the throat that had gone suspiciously dry.

"Well, since you've come into an Irish Bar, nothing but Irish will do. Unless you're a heathen like my cousin here; her Johnny Walker passion is an embarrassment to the family." The laughter in her voice heated something in him. It had deepened and reminded him of warmed honey, and he couldn't stop his eyes from following the path of her hand as it slid to the curve of her hip, gently resting there.

"You've your own embarrassing quirks," Jessi retorted—though half-heartedly. She'd been taken aback by Ella's reaction. Was she flirting with Dean? Jessi couldn't remember Ella flirting… ever.

Jessi's eyes slid to Dean's that were glued to her cousin's hand on her hip. Ella wasn't doing half bad; it looked like this was going to be far more entertaining than she had anticipated.

"What do you suggest?" Dean asked **,** recovering enough to flash his patented Dean Winchester charming smile and to clasp his hands together in front of him as he leaned on the bar, completely unaware of the fact that he had basically repeated his earlier question.

Ella smiled and shook her head, making the curls on top of her head bounce just as charmingly.

"It depends on if you want the smoothness of the Irish, the bite of the Scotch, or you drink just to get drunk."

Her voice remained easy as she leaned on her forearms on the bar in front of him, her smile widening as she continued to look at him eye to eye. She wasn't certain where any of this was coming from, but she decided to enjoy it rather than question it.

Usually a man like the one sitting in front of her would've left her replying in a stilted way. She'd have answered him with cool professionalism, efficiently getting his order before moving quickly on to the next customer. But there was something about the man, something that pulled at her. Maybe Jessi had been right about more than her wardrobe choice tonight; as much as she hated to admit it **,** teasing the man in front of her was… well, fun.

"I'm betting the last choice is going to be the wrong answer."

"I'm a bartender; there is no wrong answer. You can try to lie to impress me, but I'd know and you'd lose points."

"Points, is it?"

"Oh, please, you can't tell me you don't rank a woman when you're talking her up. Both of us are sitting here adding and subtracting points to see if the other is interested in continuing the conversation, or if we'll be better remaining bartender and customer."

"Huh. Well to tell you the truth, as a general rule my job doesn't lead to a life of drinking fancy whiskey, no matter how much I'd prefer it." The honesty he replied with surprised Ella; she'd been expecting a smoother answer. He struck her as the type that always knew what to say, but instead he gave her a quick—almost bashful—smile as he looked at his palms and back up at her. His uncertainty affected her more than any quick easy response could.

It was an admission he hadn't meant to make; it certainly didn't typically add up to a home run with girls when you told them you drank cheap because it was all you could afford. What was wrong with him? He wasn't there for anything other than to try help Jessi trigger Ella's memories. He certainly was looking to get involved with a girl that was the opposite of everything he usually looked for and off limits on more than one level.

He wondered if he played chicken with her if she'd back off, he doubted she wanted it to go beyond just flirting and he if pushed she might realize she was in over her head where he was concerned. After all there were no doubts when it came to the games between man and woman, he was a pro.

"Well," she said leaning back and standing with a warm smile. "We respect those that quietly put their lives on the line for the rest of us. You'll always find a warm meal and a good dram here. I'm Ella."

"Dean," he said with another smile and a bite of his lip that shot heat straight through her belly.

She turned, grateful for a moment to pull herself together as she took down a bottle of Jameson Black from the shelf and grabbed a glass from below the bar. She poured a good three fingers before going to her computer and keying in an order.

"I put in an order for you. I'm guessing you tend to go for hamburgers, but one taste of our Guinness Beef Boxty and you'll think you've died and gone straight to heaven."

"Sounds memorable," he replied, cocking his head, his soft sea green eyes dancing as a smile played at the corners of his mouth. She was beginning to wonder if she'd chosen the wrong man to "loosen up with". Ella could tell he knew too well how she was reacting to him, just as he'd known before when she'd been trying to unnerve him and had failed miserably. He was playing with her, and she wasn't sure she knew enough of the rules to keep up.

"Since when do you give one of our best whiskeys to a passing Hunter?" Jessi demanded as she passed behind her cousin to grab another bottle.

"Not our best; that would've been the 18 year or the Gold. I gave him the Black. We feed and offer a dram to every Guardian and Hunter that passes through, you know that," Ella said, waving her hand dismissively and shooting Jessi a brief glare.

"But you did pick your favorite," Jessi said lightly with a wide smile as she dropped that bomb and moved out of range before Ella could retaliate.

"You're favorite, huh?" Dean asked, raising an eyebrow of his own.

"I think you'll find it's smooth and well worth being a favorite," she replied demurely, dropping his gaze as a soft blush spread over her cheeks. "Give me a minute."

He watched as she returned to her job, swiftly filling the order of the waitress waiting at the end of the bar and helping her load the tray. Giving Dean a brief smile, she let herself get lost in her work for a moment.

She needed to get control over herself. She was acting like a lovesick high school girl, mooning over the first good looking guy she'd met.

Still, there had been something in those eyes and smirk that played on his lips, something almost familiar, something that pulled on her, interested her. She tried to push the thought away; it would be naive and stupid of her to let her head be turned by a Hunter.

He was just passing through, so the most she could hope for would be a quick night that would be over before the first rays of the sun slipped through the window in the morning. Glancing back at him, she found herself wondering if perhaps that one night might be worth it.

"I've got that, Jenny," Ella called, catching the waitress as she came through with Dean's meal from the kitchen. Taking it, she grabbed a roll of silver wrapped in a white cloth napkin and carried it over herself.

"Enjoy," she said simply, setting the plate down in front of him and laying the roll of silver next to it.

"If the dinner's as good as the whiskey, then thanks," he replied, giving her that smile again.

"No problem."

"You called me a Hunter, so you know about..." He trailed off as he thought for a moment before picking up silverware.

"What goes bump in the night?" she supplied while he unrolled the napkin, setting down the silverware. "My family's been in the business for a while, you could say. We take care of our own."

He looked a little uncomfortable as he put the napkin in his lap. She was betting he didn't often have a chance to eat in places that actually had cloth napkins instead of a chrome napkin box on the table. Her heart went out to him as she dropped her gaze and wiped the bar, trying to keep him from seeing what he would interpret as pity from her.

"Thanks again."

Looking up, she gave him a sweet smile and for the first time since he'd entered the bar he saw the Ella he'd known. Her hand had paused in her cleaning only inches from the fork he'd set down as he put the napkin in his lap. Unable to help himself he gently covered her hand with his much larger one. Her eyes widened.

Unlike Braedan she could've pulled her hand away, but she didn't. When Dean rubbed his thumb across the back of her hand her stomach exploded into butterflies rather than tightening, and she had no desire to bloody his nose.

 _She responded instinctively_ _;_ _her heart continued to pound, her skin warmed_ _—_ _though not from a blush._

She shook her head as the momentary vision of a young man with hazel eyes filled her head. Searing pain skimmed through her brain in a flash that was there and then gone. Where in heavens name had that thought come from?


	5. Chapter 5

"Of course," she said lightly, and after a moment pulled her hand away, confused at her response. "As I said before, we take care of our own."

He watched with a small smile as she moved down the bar to help yet another customer, although when she looked back he was engrossed in his meal. She went back to work, thankful business was picking up because it allowed her to focus on filling orders and not requiring her to think at all.

Jessi was keeping an eye on the two of them as she moved through orders fluidly, she didn't pause until she noticed her Uncle Jem heading to the bar. Instantly everything in her froze. It was supposed to be Jem's night off, and he was supposed to have headed off for a date with his wife, Charlotte, over an hour before. There could be only one reason he'd stayed: the family had finished deliberating. Finishing her current order, she met him at the counter as he came through.

"News?" She demanded, her heart beating a little faster. Everything she and Ella wanted to do with their lives depended on whether or not they would even get an opportunity.

"Later. Why don't you and Ella stay after shift for a few and we can talk," Jem told her, bringing through a container of fresh glasses.

"That's going to be tough, Uncle Jem. Ella has class in the morning," Jessi pushed, unable to help herself.

"Make the time," he growled impatiently at her as he went about restocking glasses for them. "You and Ella came to me. You wanted this, so don't make me regret going to bat for you. Make it top priority."

She glared at his back before getting back to work.

Her heart stuttered as her eyes fell on Dean, and she realized that inviting Dean to the bar may have been a mistake. She worked quickly, keeping an eye on her uncle and Dean, praying religiously that Dean would go unnoticed.

Jessi let out a sigh of relief as Jem finished stocking the glasses and headed for his office. She couldn't be certain if Jem had noticed Dean, and he tended to be more observant than she liked. Hopefully it was busy enough that Jem hadn't seen him.

It could stir up trouble if he did. She didn't need trouble, especially not now when they were so close to getting things turned around finally. After everything that had happened when they were kids, the familywouldn't want Dean anywhere near Ella for the very reasons she wanted him here.

Calling him may have been a bad idea after all. Glancing up, she caught Dean's eye. His head cocked in curiosity at the look on her face and she returned the look with a quick shake of her head. She tried to put the issue from her mind and focus on the orders.

Ella watched Dean and Jessi, there was some sort of odd tension between the two of them, what exactly it's nature she couldn't quite put her finger on, it was curious. It was as if they knew each other, which meant one of two things, the first was that Jessi had been involved with him, the other was that Jessi had been hunting again.

She wasn't certain which one she hoped it was, granted if Jessi had a fling with the Hunter then that was the end of it, if she'd been hunting again without permission it was possible it could screw up all their plans. She bided her time waiting until he was halfway through his meal and his whiskey was gone.

"Can I fill you up, or would you rather something less potent?" she asked casually, his eyes met hers again as she leaned against the bar.

"A beer would be great," he replied, with a nod she picked up a pint glass and began pouring a Black and Tan.

"You've had a full meal, Guinness alone is too heavy, but this should hit the spot."

"Do you always take charge of what your customers drink or am I just lucky?" he asked taking an amused sip.

"I suppose you're just lucky, was I wrong?"

"No," he agreed taking another drink. "This is good."

"So how do you know my cousin?" she continued to keep her voice casual, but her direct look had him sitting back.

"What makes you think I know her?"

She raised an eyebrow and leaned back, her arms crossing as she said nothing and waited. Dean took a bite as he thought, debating what he could and couldn't say.

"We worked a job together about six months ago, she talked about the place," Dean finally told her deciding the bare bones would be best, he didn't want to lie to her. She might not remember him but he remembered her and they'd been too close. He'd respected her when there were few in this world worthy of that respect, that respect carried over. Ella might have lost her memories but the core of her hadn't changed.

"Six months ago? She was hunting six months ago, what was it?" She demanded, Dean shrugged.

"A _rusalka_ up near the Great Lakes."

"She's going to screw everything up," Ella muttered, her mind sifting through to six months ago and the call she'd gotten from Jessi. "Boning up on her lore, I can't believe I fell for that bullshit."

"What?" Dean looked at her confusion clouding his eyes.

"Let me guess, she found the boy that the _rusalka_ had killed herself over, made him confess to his wife he was cheating, thereby avenging the ghost and putting her to rest."

"Yeah, pretty much,"

"Do me a favor, don't encourage her," Ella ground out between clenched teeth not sure who she was angrier at, herself for witlessly helping Jessi, or Jessi for hunting in the first place.

"What gives?"

"Just promise me that if she wants in on a hunt, you won't let her."

"Sure, on one condition," Dean replied a smile tugging at his lips again, a warmth in his gaze.

"You mean dinner isn't enough?" She smiled in return as she looked at him from under her lashes, she felt his eyes drop to her lips again before he returned his gaze to hers.

"To keep Jessi out of a hunt, no."

"How long have you known Jessi?"

Again Dean paused taking the opportunity to fill his mouth with a bite, it was interesting that when it came to her cousin he didn't want to talk, it only made her more curious.

"Long enough," Dean muttered, but didn't elaborate.

"Obviously," Ella returned, narrowing her eyes at him and leaning forward on the bar to better read his expressions. "If you're not willing to keep her out of trouble because you know how much of a pain in the ass she'll be, it wasn't just a quick one and done job with you. I don't care how much of a handful she was on the _rusalka_ job."

"We've known each other a little while, my dad worked with your family once back when I was a kid. We happened on a couple of the same cases here and there over the years, it's not like the pool is particularly deep."

"Were you involved?"

He choked on his beer, barely managing to keep from spraying it all over her. His face turned red with the force of his coughing, she was beginning to wonder if he was going to survive, when he finally got control of himself.

"No, God no," was his husky response, his eyes still watering from inhaling the beer.

"So what was your condition?"

"My what?"

"Your condition to keep my cousin out of the hunt?" Ella asked more out of curiosity rather than guile. There was an innocence in her, one that didn't realize she was leaving him any openings.

"I could probably ask for anything right now…"

"And I could say no and tell my Uncle Jem that you're here," Ella cut him off her eyes hooding and going cold. It was interesting how quickly she shut down. "We have too much at stake to let Jessi hunt and you don't want to know what he'll do when he finds out you've been hunting with her. This is his territory and he's got connections that would screw your world six ways to Sunday."

"I was just going to ask for a drink after your shift," he replied giving her an innocent look and raising his hands in a gesture of surrender. His lips spread into a boyishly impish grin. "What did you think I was going to ask for?"

"I'm a bartender, I've heard it all sweetheart."

It was rare for a woman to throw an endearment at him with the same sarcasm that he usually used himself, just as unusual as it was for him to find himself as interested in any woman the same way as Ella. It could be a dangerous thing, but for some reason he couldn't help himself.

"I know a place a few blocks down, nothing alcoholic if that's what you're hoping for, but it's an all-night diner. We go there from time to time when we're too keyed up after a shift to go straight to bed and I have a study group that meets there." Ella offered.

"Any pie?"

"Usually, it's good too, they have a deal with the woman that owns a coffee shop a few blocks the other direction. I usually get breakfast there for Jessi and I in the mornings before I have class."

"What time's your class tomorrow?"

"Luckily not until around eleven, it'll give me a chance to sleep until nine," Ella replied with a shrug, she looked as if she were going to say more, but one of her other customers hailed her again. She gave Dean a smile of regret before she slipped down the bar to help them.

Dean couldn't stop himself from watching her walk away, a low whistle emitting from his lips at the provocative sway of her hips. Unlike Jessi, Ella didn't try, it was entirely natural.

All flirting had flown out of Jessi's head, instead she worked steadily, focusing on what Jem had told her. Her mind chased itself around and around worrying about his response, or more to the point, lack of.

She couldn't be sure yet if their request for a conclave had been accepted, if they would get a chance to present their case and overturn the ruling that they never be allowed to hunt. Jessi couldn't stay out of the field. She never had been able too. It found her, whether she wanted it to or not, forcing her to fight for survival.

If the ruling wasn't overturned, then she would end up finding herself outcast by the family eventually for hunting when unauthorized. It wouldn't matter whether she was actively hunting or not. It was a very precarious position for her to be in.

Ella on the other hand had lost her drive altogether for actively hunting. It grated on Jessi to this day. Nana had cast a spell on them, all of them, but Ella had gotten the worst of it. Her powers had been completely bound and her memories wiped of everything she was.

She had no idea how Nana had managed to get the conclave to agree to that decision, but it didn't matter any longer. She wouldn't get it overturned, not that. Ella had been poisoned by that evil. Whatever had attacked them that night had poisoned her, compromised her. At least in the eyes of the family, Jessi hadn't ever believed that Ella wasn't strong enough to fight any poison.

She had survived hadn't she? Something no one else had ever managed; it was the fear of Ella turning, going dark that had Nana binding her powers and stripping her of her memories. Her cousin's powers had been too strong to risk it.

The Guardian's wouldn't allow the chance of her turning. However, they might allow Ella to be the brains behind the scene without ever raising a finger of her own.

It wasn't a perfect solution, it wasn't even close to Jessi's ideal solution, but she would take it for now. If it was all she could get. It still kept her close to her cousin, working with her, even if it was from a distance and they could still be a team of sorts.

Everything inside Jessi screamed that what had happened, what was going on, was never how it was supposed to be. They were meant for something more, something greater. Nana had robbed them of that when they had been fourteen.

Thankfully, her Uncle Jem had always agreed. He had ensured that they continue to train by sending Guardian's and Hunter's alike through their Aunt Ellen's neck of the woods. Guardians and Hunters that would gladly turn a blind eye to the politics of their family, and happily train with the girls.

It had meant sneaking out late at night from their Aunt Ellen's, but that had been a blast. She had so many great memories tied up in those nights when she'd snuck out with Ella, bringing their baby cousin Jo along for the ride.

Their Aunt Ellen wanted nothing to do with the active life. She supported the Hunters and Guardians' alike, but she refused to actively participate in the field and wanted her daughter as far away from it as humanly possible. If Ellen had ever guessed what they had been up to they all would have been skinned alive.

Thankfully, through the grace of God she had never found out, though they'd had some really close calls. If it hadn't been for Ella's quick thinking and Jessi's ability to shut Jo up, they probably would have been throttled within an inch of their lives.

"Jessi!" the voice snapped her out of her musing and she turned to see Ella flagging her down. She finished pouring the drink she was making and slid it over to the Officer with a wink before trotting down the bar to her cousin.

"What's up Ella?"

"Where the hell were you?" Ella demanded, her voice low, studying Jessi carefully.

"Lost in my own thoughts. Jem wants us to stay after shift, he has news." Jessi answered in her own undertone.

"What kind of news?" Ella's eyebrows raised.

"Your guess is as good as mine. He wasn't exactly talkative." Jessi responded with a touch of irritation.

"Well hopefully it has nothing to do with your recent hunts. What in God's name were you thinking, Jessi?" Ella demanded, her eyes flashing as she worried about what the news may be. "You know better; you know what's on the line."

Jessi flinched and shot a glare at Dean, not that he was paying attention.

"It's not like you think, Ella." Jessi responded, grabbing Ella's arm and squeezing lightly until her cousin met her eyes, " I wasn't actively out searching for hunts. I swear that to you. It just found me, like they always do and always have. Dean happened to get mixed up in it with me."

"He mentioned it." Ella said watching her cousin's eyes carefully and reading the truth in them. She still wanted to knock Jessi over the head with something, but how could she really fault her for something she couldn't escape, even when she tried.

"How did it come up?" Jessi asked curiously, and she immediately felt Ella's discomfort at the question.

"I asked how you two knew each other, because you obviously do." Ella answered, meeting Jessi's gaze head on.

"You didn't think..." Jessi's voice trailed off, her face going a little green as she swallowed convulsively.

"Well, damn it Jessi. You've seen you. You know the impact you have on men and well, it's not like he doesn't fall within a type you could easily wrap." Ella said defensively, though seeing her cousin's response so similar to that of Dean's had her inwardly relaxing. Whatever else was going on between them, a romance had not been one of them.

"No, hell no. We've worked together, a couple of times when I got dragged into something I shouldn't have. He's saved my ass, I've saved his, thanks in a large part to your help."

"The _rusalka_?" Ella asked curiously.

"Uh, huh." Jessi said with a roll of her eyes.

"He didn't go in with any protection charms?"

"Nope."

"I suppose for him it was a good thing you were there, but regardless, Jessi, you have got to quit finding trouble, especially right now. It could screw everything up!" Ella said, sounding far too admonishing. Jessi refused to let it get her back up, the reality was that Ella was absolutely right. It could, and would screw everything up.

"I know; I promise I will do my best." Jessi said emphatically.

Ella sighed, her eyes shifting to where Dean still sat and Jessi followed her gaze. He was sipping a beer and had devoured the meal Ella had been so generous to provide him.

Jessi's eyes narrowed at Dean. Taking a deep breath, she let the irritation roll off her before looking back at Ella and seeing a peculiar yearning in her cousin's eyes.

"What's going on Ella?" Jessi asked, her voice soft.

"He asked me out. I was going to go grab a drink with him after shift." Ella said, her eyes looking at anything but Jessi. Jessi sighed inwardly and put on a bright smile.

"Well, if he's worth anything he'll understand that tonight won't work and will let you move it to tomorrow or another day." Jessi said while envisioning ways she could severely damage Dean. He wasn't supposed to be hitting on her cousin!

"I suppose we could still do it after we talk to Jem." Ella said her voice thoughtful, a dreamy look moving through her eyes. Jessi swallowed down the instant panic.

"You have class in the morning don't you?" Jessi asked off handedly, trying desperately to keep her voice light. Ella's eyes finally came up to meet Jessi's. Ella's eyes rolled, the dreamy look passed as quickly as it had appeared. Jessi sent a quick prayer up that Ella hadn't completely lost herself already.

"Since when do you care if I have class in the morning?" Ella asked with a laugh and a light hip bump. Jessi reciprocated, though not quite as lightly and stuck her tongue out at Ella for good measure.

"Only since your schooling became beneficial to me." Jessi responded with her typical sass and a light toss of her head to exaggerate the absurdity of her statement.

Ella laughed and shooed Jessi away.

"Alright, smart ass, skedaddle. Back to your side of the bar and your love sick beaus." Ella said good naturedly. Jessi sighed inwardly, disaster averted, for now. She'd kill Dean later, before her cousin could really miss him.

Jessi watched curiously as Ella headed around the other side of the bar, pausing to square her shoulders before she walked to where Dean was finishing his beer.

Jessi finished her current order before leaning against the bar to watch. She had no idea what Ella was up to, but it was making her nervous.

Ella paused in front of Dean as he turned his chair to face her, leaning back. She couldn't help the way her heart raced and her stomach churned. She knew that canceling on him would mean she'd probably never see him again, but there was no help for it. The job had to be more important, she couldn't blow it all on a guy. Besides Jessi was right he was a Hunter, if he didn't understand her dedication to the same cause even one night wasn't worth it.

There was a part of her yearning for that time with him, even if it was only one night, it would be one night more than she'd ever allowed herself to have before. One night she could take out when she was older and settled, one night that she'd never forget, one night for her to experience what she'd been too busy for, too afraid to allow herself to have.

"Your shift can't be over already." Dean looked at her in surprise as he set his empty glass down and studied her.

"No." she replied softly biting her lip for a moment. "I'm not so lucky, but about later…"

"You can't make it."

"I have family business I have to take care of tonight," she said, encouraged that she saw disappointment flash across his face. "You know how it is, but maybe another time?"

"Family business?" he asked and for a moment she could've sworn she saw concern flash across his face before it went expressionless. "A case?"

"I don't know," she replied with a shrug. "It's possible it could turn into one, but I'm not certain."

He could feel her dancing around the truth the same way he had earlier when she had brought up Jessi. Though he'd been forced to dance around the truth with her, there was literally only so much he could tell her. Words that could lead anywhere close to what happened when they were kids were physically incapable of coming out of his mouth. Rosalia Jameson had been sure to tie that loose end good and tight.

This was probably for the best, he wasn't even certain where the idea to ask her out had even come from, let alone how it actually slipped out of his mouth. Nevertheless, he was disappointed, and he wasn't sure he was comfortable with that at all.

He'd used her flirting with him to talk with her like Jessi had suggested, but it was clear that seeing him hadn't jogged anything loose, hadn't brought anything back. Part of him wanted to believe with a little more time, maybe it would work, while the other part of him had known from the beginning it never would. As with plenty of Jessi's schemes it was a bust. Though he found he couldn't help wishing, right along with Jessi, that it hadn't been.

"Well, I'll see you around Ella." He said shrugging into his coat and reaching into his pocket for cash. She read his intentions like an open book.

"I meant what I said, it's on the house, same for any other Hunter," Ella put her hand on his shaking her head. "Really, you'll insult me if you try to pay me a dime. We buy a round for the fire department, or the police force after they've put their lives on the line, you job is more likely to get you killed than theirs, which says a lot."

"So it's a last meal?" Dean asked with a wry smile, the irony didn't escape him.

"You can't tell me it couldn't be," Ella pointed out as he stood. He was only inches from her, forcing her to tilt her head to see him, which normally would've been annoying, but only seemed right in the moment. Her heart fluttered at his nearness, and she could feel the heat radiating from his body.

"No, I can't."

The truth of the statement squeezed at her heart, the idea that in a few months she might hear that he'd been killed bothered her far more than she'd expected. For the first time in years she didn't think about what she did, instead she let herself react instinctively. Placing her hands on his chest and moving to the balls of her feet she leaned up and kissed him.


	6. Chapter 6

It was soft and sweet; he could practically taste the innocence in the kiss despite the fact it was by no means chaste. His heart beat doubled and he responded before he realized what he was doing, letting his hands slip to the sides of her face, caressing her ever so gently and deepening the kiss.

As she pulled back he realized he was surrounded by a chorus of whistles and hoots, dazedly he found it was the firefighters. He blinked rapidly, completely unable to process what had just happened, much less the chaos something so simple was wrecking in his body. He was on fire, and she'd done nothing more than kiss him.

He had a brief vision of dragging her off somewhere, anywhere, before he shook his head in an attempt to clear it. She was everything he usually avoided, but Ella's innocence had always tasted sweet making him lose his head and want more no matter the cost or the strings that would be attached.

"Go back to your drinks," Ella laughed good naturedly waving her hand in a shooing motion at them before she walked away. She left him standing there in complete confusion, watching her hips sway, as she rounded the corner of the bar to slip back to her post. She met his gaze with a slow sassy smile, that shot straight to his gut. "I guess I'll be seeing you around Dean, if you're in this part of the country again, don't be a stranger."

"Uh, yeah," he barely managed to get out of a mouth gone dry and a tongue gone thick. He rubbed his neck and carefully avoided Jessi's glare as he turned to leave the bar.

Ella watched him go, her heart sinking a little, although for the first time she didn't feel as if she'd entirely missed an opportunity. It was a heady feeling to know she'd taken what she wanted, done what she wanted and for once she hadn't spent so much time weighing the pros and cons that an experience just slipped by. Jessi snagged her arm before she could get to the next customer.

"Hey, I need to clear my head, I'm taking ten," Jessi told her cousin not bothering to wait for a response. Ella nodded and went back to work.

She watched as Jessi moved through the crowd with a determination that had her almost feeling sorry for Dean when Jessi caught up to him. There was no doubt, whatsoever, that poor Dean was going to get the riot act for her stunt.

A wistful smile touched her lips as she found she was only more thankful she'd kissed him. After Jessi got done with him there'd be little to no chance she'd ever see the man again.

Jessi stormed after Dean, catching him as he stepped into the cool crisp air, not caring for one of the few times in her life that it was freezing. She could see the black ice on the sidewalks and the street both, which made her thankful she lived up above the pub, as well as had her wondering if she could use it to break Dean's neck.

"What the hell is wrong with you Winchester, I said flirt not make a move." she called out ignoring the group that was streaming around her as they headed into the pub. "I warned you.

"Ella's not a little girl anymore Jessi, she kissed me not the other way around," Dean snapped out, stopping and whirling to face her.

"You didn't help it by asking her out."

"I don't know what that was Jessi, maybe it was just reflex," Dean sighed, his muscles practically vibrated in his confusion and she could clearly read the frustration in his eyes. "It doesn't matter anyway; I can't play this game with her. It was stupid to think I could. She obviously doesn't remember me and there are too many strings with a girl like her. We both know if I stick around she's going to want more than I can give her. I'm heading out, sorry it didn't work out like you wanted it to."

"Dean…" Jessi's voice stopped him from turning and walking away. She could feel the hurt mixed in with that confusion and frustration. Seeing Ella again, knowing who she was, knowing who she'd been with him and still not knowing him, it'd wounded that heart Dean liked to pretend couldn't be touched. As much as she wanted to comfort him, he wouldn't thank her for it.

"Thanks for trying, I'm sorry I got you all mixed up in this." Jessi sighed and got a short jerk of his head as acknowledgment.

"Don't worry about it Jessi, see you around," he told her before turning away.

She watched as he took a few steps, expecting him to disappear into the crowd, instead he turned to look back at her. Knowing him as well as she did she could tell even without using her powers there was something bothering him, something he wasn't sure he should get mixed up in but something he just couldn't walk away from.

"So this family business," Dean said finally, Jessi just waited. "Ella said it might be a hunt. Your family isn't thinking of sending her out without her memories are they?"

"No," Jessi assured him with an assuring smile. "Unless her memory comes back there's no way they'll let her in the field, maybe not even then. She wants to be a Historian."

"A what?" Dean asked in confusion. She had a moment to wish he had been around the farm longer to really get a grasp of their history, it would make this much easier.

"A Historian. I mentioned it when I called you," she repeated running her hand through her hair and trying to think of the easiest way to explain it. "The Guardian's used to have individuals with the blood for the job, but not the instincts for the field to work as the brains working behind the scenes, to complement the muscle out in the field. They called them Historians. Jem does some semblance of it now, coordinating hunts, finding the more obscure lore, sending out a cleanup crew to keep our allies, both Guardian and Hunter off the police's radar. He keeps our archives and ensures we have the information we need on anything we run across noted for the generations that come after us. Eventually Ella wants to take over most of what Jem does and run the hunts for our House and allies, to send them out on cases based on their particular talents. Her theory is that by focusing the House and sending people out according to what best suites their abilities we'll boost our numbers again by decreasing fatalities."

"And what happened to those Historians?" Dean's eyes were narrowed as he watched her carefully. She could see the wheels turning, there was something he'd thought of in just those few moments as she'd spoke that had him on edge. There was something she'd missed and she wasn't sure how that had happened or what it could even be.

"We've been dying out, we've needed everyone in the field, Ella's the first in centuries with the capability and the know-how to even take on the task with any possibility of success."

"Who protected them?"

"What do you mean?" Jessi asked impatiently, running through every possibility she could think of to figure out what had upset him about any of it.

"I mean," Dean fumed, furious that Jessi hadn't seen it for herself, or more likely hadn't wanted to see it. "You have a group of people that are coordinating the efforts of all those available to hunt, you have organization and focus. You have delegated purpose and the ability to deploy the best man for each job. Do you think the other team is just going to sit by and let you pick them off?"

"Of course not, but it gives us an upper hand. We'll be able to protect more people and eradicate more evil." Jessi responded still unsure as to what he was getting at, he rubbed a hand over his face, when it came to Ella, Jessi could be so clueless sometimes. Ella would've known the danger and she'd play on Jessi's lack of information and need to have Ella working with her again. Jessi wouldn't ask questions, she would be blinded by her need to simply work with her cousin again.

"Why don't you have them anymore, Jessi? How did they die? Were they targeted? I can't imagine that Ella wouldn't be the very first thing the other side would go after if she managed to be successful. You kill the brains, the organization, the puppet master so to speak, you suddenly have the ability to destroy your opponent. Did it ever occur to you why the Historian's died out?"

In dawning horror Jessi remembered history lessons from her training as a kid, most of the notable Historians had died as horribly as the Guardians they helped, and often times far more brutally than those in the field. Many of them had been captured, tortured, used horribly before death had ever come, by that time death had been more of a gift than a punishment.

Jessi wasn't certain who she was angrier at, herself for not seeing it, or Ella for not telling her.

This was something else and it wasn't something Ella would've missed or that Jem wouldn't have taken into account when they'd gone to him with the request. She immediately felt sick at the thought, and quite frankly deceived.

"S…She's…never alone," Jessi stuttered, her heart in her throat. "I'll make sure she's guarded, we all will."

"And what happens when something like what happened to your Uncle Rico happens again? What do you do if you have absolutely no choice other than to leave her unprotected?"

"I won't leave her unprotected."

"Really? What happens when evil rears its ugly head to divide and conquer? You and I know there's no way to keep quiet on what Ella's doing. Something is going to figure it out and then they'll come for her, Jessi. All they have to do is make sure everyone is in the field and disorganization is once again the name of the game. Did you honestly think that there wasn't a reason that both Hunters and Guardians have become a disorganized mess?"

"As I said, we'll keep her safe." Jessi snapped, her head spinning. He was right. She knew he was right and she was going to need time to think on all of this. Knowing what could come though was the best defense possible. Now that it was something she was aware of, a weakness that could be exploited, she wouldn't allow it to happen. She would do whatever was necessary to keep Ella safe while she fought tooth and nail to make sure the rest of the family followed suit. She would talk to Jem about it, alone. If Ella was there, Jessi wouldn't have a chance to get a word in edgewise, she'd minimize any worry Jessi had.

She had to fight not to take her frustration out on Dean, he was there, so close, and so completely irritatingly right. It was everything she should've seen and hadn't because she'd been so thankful to have Ella back, in whatever capacity available. She wasn't about to thank him for pointing out how she'd blinded herself to the truth.

"I'm not leaving here until I know she's safe," Dean told her heatedly.

"My family has all the resources we..."

"Sorry, but your family protecting her means jack shit to me, Jessi," Dean argued, cutting her off mid-sentence, continuing on with brutal honesty. "Your cousin almost died, my brother almost died, all because your family was so sure of their invulnerability. We both know that Rico made a stupid mistake, we both know he almost cost your family and mine, everything. When the shit hit the fan they had no idea what to do or how to handle it. There was nothing but chaos, Jessi. A chaos that turned an already tragic death into nearly three, and ended up causing a second one before it was done."

"So what is it you want me to do, Dean, what is it you think you're going to do?" Jessi demanded, her anger igniting at the accusations regardless of the truth behind them. "What can you do, what can I do? This was Ella's idea, Dean. Her's. It was her brain child and there is nothing I could say or do to stop her, you know how she is. Once she gets an idea, especially one that she's this passionate about she might as well be a Pitbull with a locked jaw, nothing is going to make her let go of this, nothing."

"I don't know what the answer is!" Dean growled at her, frustration rolling from him in waves, "Damn it Jessi, you're the one that dragged me into all this."

"I'm more than aware! Would it have been better if I had left her to it? Should I have just told her I wasn't interested."

"Of course not, Jessi. You know damn well that isn't what I meant. I just don't see how this ends well for any of you, least of all Ella, and now I'm a part of it. I'm not leaving until I know she's going to be okay."

"Why?" Jessi asked scornfully. "I'm pretty sure the last time she was in trouble you were out the door before you even knew if she was really okay."

"That's unfair Jessi," Dean flinched at her words. She could see the anger and guilt in his eyes. "She'd already forgotten who I was before we ever made it out the door."

Jessi studied him, she could feel the confusion rolling off of him, the internal battle he was having with himself. He wasn't even sure why he couldn't leave, but he needed to see this through, to make sure Ella was safe. Maybe it was because he hadn't been able to before and couldn't walk away again. Jessi rubbed her forehead before she crossed her arms against the cold that had finally begun to penetrate the anger.

"I'm not going to convince you to go, am I?"

"No," Dean stated firmly. "How often does she go to class by herself, out to the store, or close up the bar by herself?"

"She doesn't close up the bar by herself."

"She's never left alone after everything's locked up and you're heading upstairs?"

"It's warded."

"And so was the farm," Dean pointed out. "All those things ever need is a minute, one minute."

"So what are you going to do, follow her around?" Jessi laughed sarcastically.

"If I have to."

"She'll make you in five minutes easy, if not well before."

"Please," Dean muttered. "It's not exactly my first rodeo."

"It's not hers either, the more the dreams come, the more of her instincts have been waking up," Jessi told him. "But have fun trying. Just do me a favor alright? Keep off my uncle's radar. If the family knew you were here, it could get ugly."

"Fine."

"Oh, and Dean, it'd be really stupid of you to toy with my cousin."

"Really and why's that?"

"Sam's at Stanford isn't he?" Jessi asked sweetly.

"That would be a very stupid idea," Dean's voice was a warning, a dark warning.

"Hurting Ella would be just as stupid."

"I get it," he snapped. "Now where's the coffee shop she normally gets the two of you breakfast from? Which routes does she take to school and which classes does she take and when."

"I'll call you later Dean, I have to get back now. I've already been gone longer than I should have been." Jessi told him.

If she didn't get inside in the next thirty seconds it was highly likely she'd become a permanent ice sculpture outside the bar.

"You better call me, Jessi." Dean called as she turned to head back inside. "I'll figure it out on my own but it would make things easier with your help."

She only nodded, her head full of the things he had said. As angry as it made her, he was right about a lot of it, which only served to piss her off more.

They had failed Ella and Sam miserably when Rico had died and the consequences of that failure were still haunting them. They'd lost Granda just days later trying to get the wards back up and the evil eradicated from the farm.

One more thing that Ella didn't know, couldn't know. More than half of Ella's life was nothing but vague shadowy memories because the reality had been taken from her, and they had no intention of ever giving it back to her.

Jessi paused just inside the doors turning to watch as Dean left in the Impala. She couldn't decide if calling him had been a monumental mistake or not.

She moved through the crowd, lost in her thoughts and didn't see her Uncle until she'd nearly ran straight into him. Her head snapped up as he grabbed her arm and ushered her unceremoniously into the storage room.

Fighting him would have been a useless waste of energy.

"What was Dean Winchester doing here?" he snapped at her as he shut the door and turned back around to face her.

A million thoughts swirled through her head, and she couldn't latch onto a single one of them.

"He was just passing through town, Uncle Jem." she sighed in exhaustion as she closed her eyes and again rubbed her temple.

"Really, Jessi?" Jem asked, she could practically taste his sarcasm. Her eyes opened and she studied her uncle, he was imposing at best, at worst…well, it would be better if she didn't push to his worst.

"Really, Uncle Jem, I think he said he's headed up to see Bobby. I'd told him about the bar the last time I worked with him, and he decided to make an impromptu visit," Jessi lied glibly, Jem could only glare at her knowing there was no way to prove she was lying.

"He'd better be on his way out of town because you two already have me fighting a battle that is near impossible to win. If he sticks around and the family finds out, it isn't going to go well for either of you. You'll be loading the ammunition to shoot yourself in the foot." he growled at her.

"I know, Uncle Jem." she told him, regretting the fact that she was lying to him already. Things never worked out well when she lied to her Uncle.

"Get to work, I'll see you in a couple hours." he muttered, dismissing her as he opened the door and walked swiftly back towards his office.

She followed him out feeling more tired than she did after a hunt. Things had just gotten seriously complicated, again, and she had nobody but herself to blame, not that it was unusual.

The girls finished out the night both exhausted by the time they closed down. The downside was that it was almost three in the morning before they finished checking the closer's stations and the prep for the morning had been completed.

Ella yawned as she closed the door behind Jenny and Sean. Locking the door, she turned to join Jessi as they trudged up the stairs to the second floor where Jem's office was just down the hallway from their apartment.

Part of Jessi worried about Ella's lack of sleep lately, but more of her was furious over her argument with Dean. The pieces that had fallen into place after talking to him were spinning around and around. She'd been chewing on her frustration and anger until she was physically feeling sick over it.

The more she stewed on it, the more it grated on her, and the more her exhaustion began to slide away to make room for the simmering fury. From the moment Dean had pointed it out, the history lessons Granda had taught them whirled through her mind, lessons that had her seriously worried. Lessons that Ella wouldn't have forgotten and Jem would've reminded her of when she'd first brought up the idea.

Plopping down into one of the chair situated in front of Jem's desk harder than necessary Jessi stared at her uncle stone faced as he put his paperwork down and peered at her questioningly.

His news was more important than what she had to say and probably more necessary. No matter how angry she was, she wouldn't change Ella's mind, and in all honesty Jessi wasn't certain she wanted too. When it came down to it, dangerous or not, this was her only hope at keeping the woman that was more a sister than a cousin in her life.

Fighting to focus on the matter at hand, she studied her uncle noting Jem wasn't showing any signs of concern, but then it was nearly impossible to read him. A surge of hope filled her that perhaps the Conclave might have accepted their request. She forced down the thought that perhaps it might be better if the Conclave refused, eyeing Ella with barely suppressed irritation as she lowered into the chair next to her.

Ella was wound up, though whether that was because of the meeting or Dean, Jessi couldn't be sure. There was a part of her cousin that had remained dormant for far too long that was coming out. She sat on the edge of the chair as if ready to push it back to get it out of the way for a fight, her hands clenched into fists, her eyes trained on Jem's every movement.

Jessi could see some of the girl Ella had once been, she'd been fighting for so long to bring that back out, but it'd been Dean that had finally been able to reach her. She wasn't certain if she should be glad for it or worried.

She hadn't been joking with Dean. She would find a way to ruin him if he played with her cousin. Ella didn't deserve that. Furthermore, the whole family would go absolutely ballistic if they found out he was here and pursuing Ella in any way. No matter what, it was bound to end badly.

There was a part of her that simply wanted to sit back and watch the show, there was no doubt in her mind it would be a good one. She could already see that Ella had brought something out in Dean, something she hadn't seen in him since they'd been younger. There was a protectiveness and emotion she hadn't seen on his face in years.

Oh, she'd seen the smirk, the interested smile, his eyes hooded with the promise of the random girls he entertained himself with, but she hadn't seen him have more than a passing interest. Even the girls she'd seen him save hadn't brought the same look into his eyes that she'd seen earlier. There was something about how they responded to one another that had always seemed much deeper to her.

The reality is that she'd always believed they were perfect for each other, it might've started through the eyes of a naïve child, but having watched them tonight, she found that it still rang true. There was something about how they connected to one another that she'd seen in only one other place, her parents.

"Jessi?" Jem's voice snapped her out of her wayward thoughts.

"Uncle Jem." she responded, trying to clamp down on her irritation. It was late, she was tired, it couldn't possibly be surprising that her mind would check out?

"What's the news, Uncle Jem." Ella said in a light tone, bringing his attention to her and off of her fuming cousin. She really wasn't in the mood for the two of them to waste time arguing, she was sure the anger was more directed at her anyway.

There was something about Dean that had set Jessi off, something that she wasn't happy about. Ella fought the smile back, it would be just like Jessi to push her into relaxing and having some fun only to be pissed about who she chose to do it with, more than likely Jessi was worried about her being able to handle a man like the Hunter. It would be better to try and keep the focus on the conversation at hand and deal with her cousin's pissy attitude later.

"They have agreed to consider your request, with stipulations." Jem told them, his eyes moving between each of them.

Jessi sat up straighter, her body going slightly rigid.

"Consider?" Jessi asked, her voice colored with frustration, it was right there. She could practically taste it, they were so close and so far away.

"Before you get your back up Jessi, just listen." Jem told her firmly giving her a pointed look that had her backing down a touch.

"What stipulations?" Ella questioned, her voice giving away her own frustration.

"They want to see you two actually perform the duties that you're fighting for the right to perform. Jessi, you will be going out on what they are terming a test hunt. Ella, you will run it for her, with my guidance. I do not yet have a hunt I am comfortable sending you out on Jessamyn. Once we have something, Ella, I will be pulling you in and you will run through the logistics of it, determine what tools Jessi will need, how long she should be gone roughly, and what information she will need to complete the hunt successfully."

Jem's voice was matter of fact as he spoke to them, the gravity of it not escaping either of the girls.

"Why do I feel like there is a but to this?" Jessi asked suspiciously, trying to contain her excitement about the fact that she was finally going to get to go out on a condoned hunt.

"Because there is one, this is by no means a guarantee, or an approval. If it, and only if this hunt runs smoothly as well, will they move for you to function under a trial basis for an extended period of time. If during this time you manage to handle things as I expect you will, they will consider agreeing to a vote. Even if they go that far, there is no guarantee that you will be allowed to do what you're asking for. Nana's voice is loud ladies. It took an awful lot of maneuvering on my part to get them to even allow this."

"Are they setting us up to fail, Jem?" Ella asked the question that Jessi was thinking, her eyes boring into his. Ella had a strange feeling that something wasn't quite right about this, without thinking she placed a hand on Jessi's arm. Her cousin had gone suspiciously still after Jem had finished talking, she could feel the anger rolling off of her.

"Not to fail, but there are a lot of factors to consider in this decision Ella. There are numerous dangers with opening this door up to both of you and that fact hasn't escaped the Elders, and Nana isn't about to let any chance to win this fight go."


	7. Chapter 7

"It makes sense," Jessi said, her voice eerily quiet, an undertone layering it that neither Jem nor Ella had heard before. In unison they both turned to study her, waiting for her to continue. "Well it makes more sense to me now."

Jessi stood, completely unable to stay in her seat, her anger on the verge of strangling her if she didn't say something. She hadn't intended to have this conversation with Ella present, but the reality was that she couldn't hold it back. Dean had opened her eyes and she understood now exactly what it was they had asked the conclave for.

"What are you talking about, Jessi?" Ella asked after she exchanged looks with their uncle.

"I'm talking about that target we're placing on your back, Ella. In fact, I find I'm not really surprised that it's taken as long as it has to get this far, or that they're undecided." Jessi's voice was calm while she paced the floor in short spurts, the tension surrounding her practically visible.

Ella flinched and looked at Jem, who only raised an eyebrow.

"What's your point Jessamyn?" Jem asked, leaning forward and placing his elbows on his desk, watching her carefully. She whirled on them both, stopping in her pacing, her eyes flashing dangerously.

"My point? I would've thought it was obvious. The two of you never thought once in the entire time we've been doing this to mention exactly what Ella was asking for. I thought I was the one who came up with the hair brained schemes, but apparently I'm not alone in them. Why in God's name did you decide to just leave me in the dark? Did you think, 'oh it won't occur to her; she'll never realize what we're trying to get the Elders to approve'," Jessi's voice was quiet, but deadly.

Ella's own eyes flashed as she stood to face Jessi. Jem sat back, choosing to stay out of range, at least for the moment. "That's not fair, Jessi. It wasn't that we were trying to hide it from you; I just didn't see any need to worry you about how difficult it would be."

"Screw that, Ella. I deserved to know the details," Jessi's voice punched through Ella, only igniting her anger.

"You're making a bigger deal out of this than you need to," Ella responded. Her voice held that note of reasonability that made her sound patronizing.

"Like hell I am, Ella!" Jessi fought to keep from screaming the words in her frustration. "I might not have the same interests that you do, and I might not know my history as well, but I'm not a fucking idiot. You played me. You knew damn well I would never think about what happened to the Historians and why there aren't any left. In fact, I'd be willing to bet you banked on it!"

"I wouldn't be in any more danger than you will in the field." Ella's voice was dangerously calm. Slowly she took a step towards Jessi, her hands unintentionally balled into fists.

"Bullshit! We've caused more damage in this ongoing battle when we've had Historians running the show from behind the scenes. We were tipping the scales, pushing the darkness back and it was losing. Because of it, the majority of the Historians were hunted mercilessly," Jessi argued. "They were one by one hunted down by the creatures that were willing to throw aside their own vendettas with each other to take out a larger threat. You would be that threat! You would have more coming for you then I can possibly imagine, and you don't even have the drive or blood lust to protect yourself against the coming storm."

"If you want me as your partner, Jessi, this is the only way you're going to get it," Ella snapped back. "This is the only chance I have at being a part of the fight, and I'm damn good at it. You want me by your side so damn much, well, this is the only way you're going to have it. I am not defenseless, Jessi."

"You don't have the fight to fend off that kind of attack, and you damn well know it. What happens when they have us all chasing after some apocalypse and you're here, unprotected, left alone because each and every one of us is needed on the outside to keep the world from ending. You can't tell me they aren't more than capable of putting together exactly that kind of scheme."

"That idea is completely ludicrous, Jessi. It won't happen. I won't be unprotected," Ella said dismissively. "The family wouldn't let me do it, if I weren't capable of it."

Jessi looked at Jem, still sitting in his chair saying nothing waiting for them to finish before he finally spoke.

"Am I wrong?" Jessi demanded, her voice vibrating with the force of her anger.

"You're not," Jem responded, causing Jessi to throw up her hands and shoot Ella a triumphant look before Jem continued speaking in his calm and reasonable baritone. "But neither is Ella, Jessi."

Jessi spun on her heel at the smug look Ella tossed at her before she went back to pacing, mumbling incoherently under her breath. Ella rolled her eyes and threw up her own hands before sitting back down. She really didn't have the energy for Jessi's temper tantrum.

"Jessamyn, sit down and listen to me," Jem ordered her quietly.

"I'll listen, but I'm not sitting," Jessi retorted, not willing to completely ignore her uncle, but incapable of sitting down at this point.

"We shouldn't have kept pieces from you when we started this journey, but the only person I needed to be sure understood the danger was Ella. She is the one who wants to perform the duties and she is the one that will ultimately have to live with the consequences," Jem said softly as Jessi continued to pace his floor, though with slightly less force than she had been.

"It's my choice, Jessi," Ella added passionately. Jessi spared her no more than a glance, choosing not to respond to the statement.

"However, you are right in this being why the Elders will not make a decision on this lightly and it is also why Nana's voice is resonating with them so forcefully."

"What are they afraid of?" Ella demanded in irritation at the whole thing.

"You," Jem and Jessi's voices answered her in unison. Ella didn't bother glancing at Jessi instead she continued to stare at her uncle in frustration.

Jem saw Jessi's mouth open to speak and shook his head at her imperceptibly. She obeyed, but it wasn't without a glare.

"Look, I know we haven't exactly sat down and had a heart to heart about what happened when Rico and Da died. You were poisoned with a toxin the like of which no one else has ever survived. We don't know how far-reaching that poison is, but your very blood was tainted by something truly evil. You could be very dangerous in the hands of our enemies."

"Do you think I'm stupid enough that it hadn't already occurred to me?" Ella ground out through her teeth.

"No, I'm very well aware of your ability to reason things out, but the simple fact is you'll be setting yourself up as a target. A target greater than the Historians that came before you. With the combination of your talents and what you wish to do for this family, coupled with the dangers associated with your capture, it has many of the Elders dead set against this all together. It took everything I had to convince them to consider allowing a test hunt. We can either take what's been given, or you can wash your hands of it. That's your call."

"I won't walk away," Ella answered coldly, resolutely.

"I didn't expect that you would." Jem responded, a smile spreading across his face, "You two need to go to bed; you need to rest up and be ready when I've got the hunt worked out."

Ella stood, pausing to look at her cousin who was still pacing the office, her anger wilted.

"Jessi..." Ella's voice trailed off as Jessi met her eyes and she saw the fear and pain in her cousin's.

"I get it Ella. I do, really. I just need some time to digest it," Jessi answered, her voice showing her own exhaustion.

Ella nodded and headed out of the office for the apartment and her bed. It would be better to talk to Jessi tomorrow, after they'd both had some sleep and time to cool down. She found she just didn't have the energy for it right now.

Jessi started to follow Ella out, but paused at the door as Jem stood reaching for his jacket.

"It's not me hunting they object to, is it?" Jessi's voice was soft, almost tortured.

"It isn't," Jem responded, his blue eyes that were nearly the same shade as her own looking at her directly while he slipped his arms into his jacket. He saw the pain flash across her face before she masked it. It didn't surprise him; in fact, he'd expected it.

"I have a bad feeling about this, Uncle Jem."

"Give it time, Jessi."

"What other choice do I have?" she asked with a sigh,not expecting an answer as she left his office and slipped down the hall to her own bed. The apartment was dark and silent as she moved quietly through it to her room. She didn't bother turning on the lights as she threw off her clothes and slipped into bed. Within minutes she fell into a restless sleep.

The sunlight streamed through the windows that faced east as Ella rolled over and rubbed sleepily at her eyes. Blearily she twisted her wrist to look at her watch, and after a few moments of blinking she was able to get her eyes to focus enough that she realized the small hand was on the nine and the big hand was just a few hash marks before it.

"Shit."

Throwing back the covers, she dragged herself out of bed, though the lure of curling back up and sleeping through her first class was sorely tempting.

"Damn it," she groaned as she hauled herself over to where the jeans were that she'd abandoned the night before. Normally it would've bothered her to leave her clothes on the floor, but she'd been too upset and far too tired to care. Now it was a Godsend; she'd have to haul ass to be able to grab breakfast for herself and Jessi before class. It might've been only a few more feet to the closet, but it would save her precious seconds that would allow her to still get to _Le Petite Coin Paradis_ , and this morning she needed that incentive of Madame Dupond's perfectly poured Café Au Lait to get moving.

As she wiggled into the jeans, she tried not to think about how much of her night had been spent staring at the clock despite her exhaustion. There was nothing more frustrating than needing sleep and not being able to get any. Her mind wouldn't quiet, and she'd spent most of the night torn between forcing the issue with Jessi and giving her some space. No matter how many times she'd told herself that it would be far smarter to give Jessi the time she asked for, she couldn't help wanting to have it behind them. They'd already lost too much time fighting.

So instead of getting the sleep she so desperately needed, she'd obsessed over the issue, tossing and turning until she'd finally fallen into a restless sleep.

Buttoning her jeans, she scooped up the vest and tank from the night before, hanging the former over her desk chair while she tossed the tank in the general direction of the hamper. She didn't bother to see if she'd made the shot; instead she dug through the basket of laundry on the chest at the end of her bed.

She didn't have time to be picky about clothing. Any clothing would have to work. The first shirt that came to hand, she pulled on. As she tugged the hem down she realized it was the kelly green promo shirt from the previous St. Paddy's Day. As a general rule she only wore it when she was cleaning since it had been liberally splashed with every alcoholic beverage under the sun.

It appeared that she'd gotten most of the beer stains out with the last washing. She figured it covered what she needed covering to keep from being arrested for public indecency, and beyond that it didn't matter.

Pausing in front of the mirror, she stopped long enough to wipe at the eyeliner she'd forgotten to take off before bed. She was pale from lack of sleep and the smeared eyeliner that remained only accented her pallor along with the circles under her eyes, but it couldn't be helped.

The alarm took that moment to go off, leaving her jumping and cursing as she glanced at it, wondering if it it'd been possessed. Thankfully it didn't appear possessed; instead the power had gone out exactly nine hours before. She snagged a hair tie from her vanity and instead of brushing her hair she chose to wind the long mass up into a particularly messy bun. A brush and a shower would've been better, but there wasn't time, so instead she headed out the bedroom door.

Not for the first time, she lectured herself on the merits of going to _Le Petite Coin Paradis_ for breakfast every morning, but the rush of pleasure when she took that first sip made everything seem right in her world.

It was comforting. Jessi's maternal grandparents had owned a small French bakery in the French Quarter of New Orleans and had passed their knowledge onto Elise. She'd been spoiled by her aunt's baking and it was a little piece of the home both Ella and Jessi had lost.

Stopping by the door she grabbed a wad of tips that Jessi had left on the breakfast bar. It was far more than likely that it was her turn to pay anyway, especially since Ella generally paid for both of them.

Picking her keys up from the bowl and her knife, she grabbed her leather jacket and her scarf from the coat rack. Slipping the coat on and wrapping the scarf around her neck, she walked down the hallway and jogged down the back stairs into the currently empty kitchen of the Pub. There was a private entrance, but the girls rarely used it; besides it would be quicker to cut through the alley to get to the bakery than go around. She was already wishing she could materialize in the coffee shop as it was.

Opening the back door, the cold air hit her and she wrapped her coat around herself, heading toward warmth and breakfast as quickly as possible.

It wasn't more than two blocks down the street and half a block over from Jameson's. The walk would do her good, but she felt like a parched woman dragging herself through the Sahara with no water.

That was if the Sahara was cold enough to make her nose turn pink and her breath catch in her lungs, she amended as she hunched her shoulders against the cold and started down the alley. She fiddled with the keys she'd put in her pocket as she trudged toward her first destination.

She couldn't shake the argument she'd had with Jessi the night before; it had happened so unexpectedly. It wasn't as if she'd been hiding it from her cousin exactly, Ella just hadn't wanted to deal with Jessi's worry. She was tired of being treated like a child, a feeble one at that.

For years it had been Ella that had taken care of Jessi. It had been Ella's job to keep her younger cousin safe, to keep her from jumping into something without thinking it through and to get her out of trouble when Jessi had inevitably gotten in over her head. Something had changed while Ella had been sick. Not only had she lost the drive to hunt, but Jessi had begun babying her.

She probably should've outlined the danger of becoming a Historian, but it was a possibility only, not a surety. What was the point of letting Jessi drive herself crazy trying to protect Ella when she would spend her life in either Jem's home or the farmhouse? Both places were heavily warded, particularly the libraries, and there were always Guardians in and out at all times. It was unlikely that she'd ever find herself alone at either of the houses.

When she eventually wanted to make her own home and library, it too would be heavily warded. Besides, it wasn't as if she intended on relying on the wards; she'd been planning to begin fully training again. She'd never end up in the field, but she didn't want to depend solely on someone else to protect her.

Jessi often forgot that while she'd lost the edge of a Guardian, she was still fully capable of defending herself—as capable as any civilian that understood the danger. Granted, a civilian couldn't handle the full ramifications of the war itself; the toll was great and they weren't made for it. Still, she hadn't become completely passive and helpless.

Ella sighed. It would probably be better to talk to Jessi after she got home from class. It would go better if her cousin was better rested and had the chance to cool off. In the end she knew she'd talk Jessi down. After all, Jessi wanted Ella fighting with her in any capacity. They needed each other. Once she'd had a chance to calm down, Jessi would come around; she always did.

Ella took a deep breath and let it out **,** mentally noting that it would probably be a good idea to start fight training again. It would mollify Jessi, making her feel more secure in the fact that Ella could defend herself if necessary. It would probably be a good idea to start training with someone other than her cousin, though. She knew Jessi would be likely to go too easy on her, which wouldn't do her any favors in a real fight.

Setting that thought aside, she tried to pinpoint what was really bothering her about the argument; it wasn't the fight itself. This wasn't the first time Jessi had been overprotective, and it certainly wouldn't be the last time they'd argue about it.

No, what was really bothering her was that since Jessi had come back from Tulaneshe'd never once questioned Ella's plan. It hadn't occurred to her to question the danger to Ella of becoming a Historian. If she were honest, she'd breathed a sigh of relief when Jessi hadn't pointed it out at the beginning, because if she'd thought about it this blow up would've happened a whole lot sooner.

Ella pursed her lips. She was willing to bet big that someone or something had tipped Jessi off. Who, she couldn't be sure, but someone the night before. Jessi's temper was a quick storm and she wasn't capable of holding onto it.

No, someone mentioned it during their shift last night and it wasn't Jem. She'd asked him not to mention anything to Jessi. He hadn't liked keeping it a secret, but he'd agreed.

Ella's eyes narrowed. Jessi had come back from talking to Dean with fury practically crackling around her. At the time, Ella had assumed it was because Jessi was trying to protect her. Could it have been the Hunter? Was he the one who pointed out the problem with Ella's plan? And if he had, why? It wasn't as if they knew each other, or that he had any reason to care enough to say anything. At least she didn't think he did…

Her mind trailed off on the last thought. For the last block she'd had the nagging feeling she was being watched. Her instincts weren't screaming, but they were tugging at her, annoying her. It was like an itch she couldn't scratch.

Using the storefront window as a mirror, she watched and was rewarded with a familiar profile of a man. She'd studied it the night before enough when she'd thought he wasn't looking.

"Speak of the devil," Ella muttered, watching as he stopped, lingering just out of her line of sight though she could feel him still there. Despite her irritation at the thought that he might have started the argument with her cousin, her heart lifted.

Well, that was until she glanced down at what she was wearing and sighed. Of course she would look like a half dead corpse, buried by some seriously drunken friends. There was nothing that could be done about it now anyway. Besides if he wanted a beauty queen who never had a hair out of place, he was going to be seriously disappointed.

The alleyway just ahead of her faced west, leaving it shadowed and dark despite the time of day. Turning, she slipped into the shadows and stepped into a doorway just out of sight.

Peering from her shadowed hiding place, she watched as Dean ambled around the corner, trying to appear as casual as possible. He moved down the alley clearly searching for her, knowing she couldn't have gotten to the other end of it without him being able to see her.

"Damn it," he muttered as he passed her, turning to look at the fire escapes and back to the other side of the alley.

As he turned to retrace his steps she slipped silently behind him, the knife open and in her hand. Moving quickly, she set the knife against his neck. Instantly he stilled.

"Why are you following me?" she asked with more curiosity than anger. She doubted he was going to hurt her; she found herself more amused than scared, but at the same time she didn't like being followed.

"I saw you heading up the street and thought I'd catch up to you," Dean replied calmly, reasonably. She had to give him credit; he acted as if it were every day he found a knife at his jugular, though considering what he was it wasn't completely out of the realm of possibility. She had to admire the way he remained so cool. "I thought I had a case, but I did some research and realized it was a bust."

"Really? You just happened to see me and you followed me for two blocks without saying anything?" she snapped. "You stayed out of sight because you thought you'd catch up to me?"

"You know," Dean said conversationally. "I'd recommend a gun over a knife if you're worried about being followed."

Before she could reply he'd twisted, catching her wrist and sidestepping the knife. She'd known enough Guardians and Hunters in her life to be impressed. He was a natural warrior; the fluidity of his movements was a born talent and he'd obviously honed that talent. With a lifetime's worth of practice, it was possible to come close to what came naturally to him, but it would be an uphill battle.

She tried to slip his grip, but he intuitively stopped her. Mentally Ella cursed her lack of training in the past few years; she was pitifully slow. Dean hit a pressure point in her wrist causing her to curse again as a sharp pain shot up her arm, but she kept a death hold on her weapon, refusing to let it go despite the pain.

Stubbornly she forced herself to focus past the pain. Taking advantage of the distraction the pain brought Dean pushed her back against the wall using his superior strength and weight to effectively pin her. Ella fought not to blush at the feel of his body thatwas flush against hers, making her acutely conscious of the contrast between the cold and unrelenting stone behind her and the warm firm muscle against the front of her. She couldn't ignore the warmth that pooled low in her belly as he looked at her with a blank expression and burning eyes.

No matter how much he attracted and fascinated her, she couldn't lose sight of the fact he was a Hunter. He was nomadic by necessity; his job took him all over the country and the job she was going to be taking on would leave her settled in South Bend.

Had that not been a factor, she still wasn't stupid. He was the kind of guy that kept things light. There would be little to no future with him. If she was lucky he'd come into town from time to time as he passed through her neck of the woods, and they might have an incredible weekend together, but he'd never be able to give her any more than that.

Damn, she wished it could be more, though. There was something so familiar about him, something that made her feel like she knew him. Combining the confusing emotion with the feel of his body against hers, it was almost spellbinding.

Looking down, she tried to gain control of herself, taking a deep breath as she scolded herself for acting like a teenager struck with puppy love. If she were smart she'd walk away now; it would probably be better for them both.

Dean studied her, his heart pounding as she looked demurely down. She was chewing on something, her face carefully neutral. He couldn't help but notice the scooped neckline of her shirt offered a fantastic view, especially pressed up against his chest.

He wanted her, it was as simple as that. Part of him wanted to get her out of his system and part of him was afraid that he would find that she wasn't any different than any of the other girls that had passed through his life. She'd been his first love, the first girl that had touched his heart even as she'd tied him up in knots of need.

"Lesson over?" she asked, bringing his attention from her assets back to her face. She cocked her head irritably and pushed back against him, which she quickly found wasn't a good move.

She'd needed a little space, a chance to breatheand to get her brain to fully engage again. His body had been pressed tightly against hers and as she'd tried to push away it'd rocked her body against his in a way that only made things worse.

The breath she was frantically trying to control shortened even more, every nerve ending coming alive and instead of giving her more room, he instinctively pushed closer.

Depsite the fact he knowing that the last time he'd been so tangled up by her it'd nearly cost him his brother didn't stop him from being drawn in. No matter how much he told himself it hadn't been anything more than a stupid high school infatuation, he wanted her. It was as simple as that.

No matter what he told himself, regardless of the fact that he knew he should take a step back and give them both space, he couldn't. When it came to Ella he'd always been incapable of listening to any kind of logic.

The uncertain look she'd given him only made it worse, making him feel as if he'd been the only one to touch her, the only one to kiss her until she'd lost reason. He cursed himself for being stupid while as he lowered his head, his lips touching hers, needing the taste of her more than he currently needed air. She was a complication and he didn't generally like complications; he couldn't afford themnot then and even less now. Still, he couldn't help himself any more than he could at sixteen.

He'd been her first kiss; it hadn't taken a rocket scientist to know it. Somehow she'd reached into his chest and squeezed his heart. She was everything he'd ever looked for and everything he avoided. He wasn't certain where the thought came from, but he pushed it away.

He meant to pull away, but her hand slipped up, splaying across his jaw and cheek pulling him closer, pulling him deeper into the kiss.

She didn't care if it was one night or months; she lost herself completely. She'd been in control the night before, and while he'd by no means been an unwilling participant, it'd taken him by surprise and he hadn't exactly been prepared with his A game. Her mind completely blanked as her body came alive in a way she'd never felt before.

It was something that had never happened before, period. She enjoyed a good kiss as much as the next girl, but rarely had the time for it. The best kiss she could remember hadn't been able to completely quiet her mind. There was always a piece detached and working through everything from her grocery list, to her schedule, to the chores that needed to be taken care of. It was the first time that she'd ever been drawn completely, utterly, and wholeheartedly into a kiss. When he nipped at her lip she couldn't stop the whisper of a whimper or the way she trembled as his hands slipped into her hair, angling her mouth so he could take more.

It was a mistake. It was a thought that slipped in and out of both of their minds, but stopped neither.


	8. Chapter 8

For the first time Ella could remember she fell into the moment, enjoying the passion and the heat as it raced through her. She enjoyed the sensation of feeling and not thinking while her body felt so completely alive. When he pulled back, his eyes were as heavy-lidded as hers, his breath coming out in the same rapid puffs of white.

"Apparently not," she whispered, a wry smile slipping across her lips. Instinctively she brushed her thumb across his lip where her tinted lip gloss had smeared leaving a pink shiny spot. The feeling of his kiss against her thumb had her fighting to take a much needed deep breath. She struggled to clear her mind and as it began to engage a devious idea had her lips curving.

When he dropped his head she let him take her under for another moment, thoroughly enjoying it, as one hand slipped to wrap around his neck, while the other still holding the knife brought it to rest against the hollow of his throat. Her upper body was caught between him and the wall, but there was some room for her legs to move, enough thatshe brought her knee up just shy of hitting him in a particularly vulnerable spot. Instantly she felt him go dead still, slowly raising his head to look at her.

"I told you I wasn't completely helpless," she said simply, her lips nearly brushing his as she spoke. He pulled back just enough to watch her through narrowed eyes as he tried to gauge if she was planning on following through with the threat.

"Touché."

She raised an eyebrow and waited until he took a step back with his hands raised in a gesture of surrender, but he didn't move any further than that step. He was still crowding into her space, but she was pretty sure it was to keep her off balance and she sidestepped him, putting a little more space between them.

Her mind engaged again, reminding her of the questions that had been circling around her mind only a few moments before. She couldn't help wondering if the reason his job had fallen through had been because Jessi had asked him to keep an eye on her.

"Was this Jessi's idea? Did she call last night and tell you I needed a bodyguard? Is that why you bailed on your job?" she asked as she casually put her knife away.

"No, not really."

Her eyes narrowed at his answer. As she continued to watch him, silently frowning, a familiar line appeared between her brows and her nose wrinkled slightly. It was the same look he remembered from when they'd been younger; she was working something out, fitting the pieces of a puzzle together.

"What do you mean, 'not really'? It's a yes or no kind of question, Dean," she prodded, her eyes narrowing and her tone cooling in a way that warned him not to bullshit her.

"Didn't you say there was a good coffee shop around here?"

He glanced up and down the alleyway before looking at her with a bland expression, one that she answered with a glare.

"Yeah I did, two store fronts west from where we're standing," she replied, as her arms crossed and she planted her feet, her head cocking. He just looked back at her, choosing not to answer her questions. After a moment he shrugged and gave her a look that asked her what she was waiting for.

"Enjoy your breakfast."

Her voice was emotionless and the lively light that had danced in her eyes when she'd looked at him earlier had disappeared entirely as she turned on her heel and began stalking away.

"Wait, where are you going?"

"I'm not feeling like the coffee shop for breakfast this morning. I have to hit the library on campus; I'll stop by the coffee cart on my way." Her voice had gone frigid as the wind that suddenly whipped around them chilled them both to the bone. "Just head that way. It's called _Le Petite Coin Paradis,_ you can't miss it."

"Really?"

Dean looked at her with aggravated surprise and she responded with only a shrug, as if it didn't matter. Her expression was bland and nonchalant while she bit down on her irritation. The coffee cart had meager offerings and she had been craving her usual breakfast, to the point she was practically desperate for it, but she'd be damned if she went with Dean.

More than anything she was tired of the secrets from everyone. Everywhere she turned she was met with someone hiding the truth. Whether it was her family or this man she barely knew, there was something here thatshe couldn't quite place, something tugging on her and pushing at her, something she could just put the tips of her fingers on, but couldn't quite grasp.

It frustrated her to no end. In so many ways since her whole world had been turned upside down, she'd been cushioned from hunting. It was as if she was delicate and fragile, that everyone was waiting for the slightest thing to shatter her completely.

Staring at the stone wall only feet from them for a moment, she fought to control her emotions. It wouldn't help if she allowed Dean to twist her up. In fact, he knew something. From what he'd said and what she'd gathered, he knew her cousin. They knew each other far better than either had let on, well enough in fact Ella wondered what Jessi might have told him. She couldn't be sure how much her cousin had confided, but it might be an angle worth pursuing; whatever it was that her family kept dancing around might just be something Dean knew.

Studying him briefly before looking back at the stone wall, she wondered if she pushed him it might be possible to get him to talk. She was betting it wouldn't be the first time he'd been pumped for information, but it wouldn't hurt to see what she could get.

"Do you know what my biggest problem is right now, Dean?" She asked, crossing her arms and cocking her hip. He watched her closely as his eyes hooded, hiding some of his emotion from her.

"What's that?"

"That in less than ten minutes of talking with my cousin you managed to instigate a fight. She's furious with me and it isn't because she's being over protective, not that that doesn't happen. No, she's irate because she got it into her head that I'm in danger. Now, I love my cousin, and I by no means consider her dense or stupid. In fact, she's far more brilliant that she'd ever admit to, but she wouldn't have gotten there on her own."

"Jessi couldn't have seen the flaws in your plan herself? I don't think you're giving her enough credit."

"Oh she could've seen them, but you see, Dean, she didn't want to," Ella informed him, her own eyes narrowing as she spoke. "It's why after all these months I haven't had to say anything because she was so damned happy that I might have any capacity to be her partner that she didn't question it. She wouldn't have; it's why we haven't talked about it. Now you show up here, you start sticking your nose in my business and you're following me, so either you start talking or I'll make sure you're out of town within the hour."

"And how do you plan to manage that?"

"I warned you last night that my Uncle Jem could screw you over in ways you couldn't imagine. It wasn't an empty threat not now, not then."

Dean tamped down on his own impatience and irritation with effort. As much as he wanted to respond in kind, he knew she had a point. As long as he could hold on to his own temper and think beyond it, he had a chance. He had to push beyond that emotion to the coldness, the logic, and do his best not to be backed into a corner by Ella. The best chance at that would be keeping her angry enough to keep her off balance while at the same time keeping her from doing the same to him.

"It's not my fault that I noticed the flaw in your plan sweetheart, all I did was ask her about the job you mentioned last night. We talked about it the same as we've done plenty of other jobs before; I just pointed out the flaws. It's not my fault she got angry. You should've told her in the first place."

"Maybe you're right, but I should've been the one to tell her, not you, and I would've in my own time, in my own way."

"When? After you were dead because you didn't want to tell her the truth?"

She could see the frustration in his eyes,and she could see the fear making her wonder what could possibly put those emotions in his eyes; he barely knew her.

"It's not your place to decide anything for me, Dean, or for my cousin."

Her words were said with a flatness that bothered him, her body so tense that she was practically vibrating.

"Don't you get it? Jessi cares about you, she's worried about you, and she has every right to be," Dean retorted, trying desperately to keep one step ahead of her.

Ella bit down on the inside of her cheek. She could see the emotion rising in Dean's eyes, andshe was on the verge of pushing him into saying something he wouldn't mean to.

"You don't know Jessi and you sure as hell don't know me, sostay the hell out of it," Ella snapped dangerously. Dean reached out and grabbed her arm in a bid to keep her from storming away.

"I know enough to understand that when it comes to you, she has blind spots. She missed you, she wanted you back in her life, but we both know you need protection and she couldn't do that if she didn't realize what you weren't telling her."

"Back off, I mean it," she hissed, wrenching her arm from his grasp. "We didn't need your help."

"Oh sweetheart, both of you need more help than you can even imagine."

"I think you've done enough."

"You're in over your head; you couldn't stop me from pinning you. What are you going to do when something bigger, badder, and more evil than I am comes for you?"

"You act like you know me, like you have a right to give a shit about any of this, when the truth is I don't even know your last name. You don't know me, you don't know my cousin, and you have no clue who my family is. My family's been doing your job for thousands of years. How long has yours, pretty boy?"

"Wow, so you really are a Guardian?" Dean shot at her. "You didn't act like it at first, but I should've known that it wouldn't be long before I was the grunt Hunter that was so beneath you. I was just trying to help, Princess. Jessi's a friend. What's going to happen to her when you die, when she could've saved you but there was information she should've seen and didn't because she's so damn blind when it comes to you?"

He had to appreciate, even through his anger, the way Ella's eyes flashed and the color that burned in her cheeks at her fury. He watched in fascination the switch flip; all that fury was drained away as her narrowed eyes glittered.

"Exactly how many hunts have you been on with my cousin?"

Damn it. It was all he could think. She'd done it, she'd backed him into a corner and he had to answer. It was his turn to drop his eyes. She watched him steadily hiding the smile of victory as he rubbed the back of his neck before looking back at her.

"A few," he admitted.

"How many?" she demanded "How well do really know Jessi, Dean? It would be better if you just told me the truth now. I'll find it out later and I'll do everything in my power to cut you out of both my life and Jessi's. Don't think I can't do it."

"A handful over the years."

His voice was quiet, but she could hear the truth.

"How many years?"

"Off and on for a while."

"What's a while?"

"I don't know," he cried, at a loss of how exactly to tell her the truth when he couldn't. "Years. My dad worked with your family off and on for years, and we ran into each other on a hunt about five years ago. On occasion we've teamed up together when it was something one of us couldn't handle on our own."

"You mean when Jessi couldn't handle it on her own," Ella corrected. "Exactly how many hunts have you covered up for my family?"

"Enough," he snapped.

"So you know she's been banned, and you know that hunting could get her killed not only from the things she's going after."

He shook his head in admiration. She was good, damn but she was good. When they'd been kids he'd had a hard time keeping anything from her; she'd always been able to wheedle it out of him sooner or later.

Glancing down at her watch she realized the argument had taken up far more of her time than she meant it to. If she was lucky she'd only just be late for class at this point and damn it she was hungry. With a growl she made a split decision. She'd have to call into one of her classmates for their notes. She'd pushed Dean enough that he might talk. If she walked away now, she had a feeling he'd lock up tighter than a vault.

"Look, I have more questions, andI'm sure you have a few of your own. I'll buy you a cup of coffee," she offered, and without bothering to wait to see if he followed her, she led the way to the coffee shop.

When they reached the door, he stepped past her and opened it for her in a gesture of chivalry she hadn't been expecting. She gave him a smile as she ducked her head before slipping past him into the warmth of the shop.

"You know, I still don't know your last name," she said conversationally.

"It's Winchester," he replied, flashing her a grin. She tried not to notice how laugh lines creased the corner of his eyes and accented his smile. It took a moment for his name to sink in and all of her other questions disappeared like a popped bubble.

The smell of richly roasted coffee and fresh baked goods faded to the background along with his smile when Dean saw the recognition in her eyes.

"You're one of the two boys that trained with my grandparents."

The statement was one he'd been hoping for, but at the same time he had been dreading. How would he explain it all to her? He'd left before she'd recovered—not by his choice, of course—but still he'd made a promise to her that he hadn't been able to keep.

"Dean, and your younger brother is Sam. I've been studying your family."

Of all the things he'd expected she would say, that most definitely wasn't what he'd imagined. His forehead furrowed in confusion.

"What?"

"I'm sorry," she said with the bright-eyed interest he recognized as that of a scholar. He'd seen the look often enough when Sammy had found a particularly interesting case, or though it completely baffled Dean, a school project that had particularly fascinated his younger brother. "I was looking at the beginning to contact those from the family histories I've been studying and here you are for me to ask the questions I need answered."

"You've been studying my family history?" Dean asked, still clearly confused, but his voice cooling. The next question was said carefully and with some irritation. There were parts of his family's past he didn't like anyone researching. "Which part of my family history did you want to know about?"

"Not necessarily the most recent, granted though that in itself is interesting." She paused as they approached the counter. Turning, she gave a big smile to the small white haired lady standing behind it; there was a bag and two to go cups already waiting. "Add his to mine."

"Interesting isn't exactly what I would call it."

Ella's gaze flew to him as he avoided her look. She closed her eyes, remembering that a scholar's interest didn't always translate to those touched by tragedy. She'd been studying his line for proof he was a potential Lost Line. Proof she planned to take to the Guardian Council to petition for Hunters to be taught, to have access to their House's protection, their archives, and their tools. In her excitement she'd let herself forget the trauma that had brought Dean's family into the hunt.

"I'm sorry, that was insensitive," Ella back-pedaled as she put her hand on Dean's arm, keeping him from turning away completely. "I suppose as the child of Guardians, we're raised with an early death as an inevitability. It isn't unusual for our parents to die, especially not when we're as young—if not younger than—you were. Jessi's parents died when we were small, and my parents weren't around much; they were too invested in the hunt to raise me. Our expectations of family life are not the same as most people's and I forgot that you didn't start as a Guardian with the knowledge of all its burdens."

He simply shrugged at her before he ordered a coffee and cherry Danish. His face had gone expressionless, leaving her with the urge to kick herself. She'd picked the worst way to introduce him to her pet project which left her to think quickly to remedy her mistake.

Ella passed over the cash she'd taken off the counter, trying to think of a way to smooth it back over so she could ask him some questions and maybe share her thoughts with him. If he was willing to cooperate, it could potentially slingshot her research and give her the ability to get to the bottom of her theories much faster.

" _Merci Madame_ ," she murmured, taking the drink tray with two cups and the white paper bag that held the pastries for both herself and Jessi, making sure to give the woman a generous tip.

"You're welcome, sweet girl," the older woman responded in French. Ella felt Dean's eyes on her, flicking between herself and Madame. "Who is Mr. Big-and-Handsome?"

" _Pardonne moi_ ," Ella replied, biting down on the smile at Madam's description. "Dean Winchester, this is Madame Dumond. She's a dear family friend and the shop owner."

"Nice to meet you," Dean said politely, taking her hand and smiling charmingly.

"It's time you bring a young man around; you have good taste my dear."

Ella was thankful that Madame continued to speak in French and responded in kind, hoping Dean couldn't follow their conversation.

"No Madam, he is a friend of the family, an ally, a Hunter," Ella told her with a dismissive shake of her head.

"Hm, I doubt that's how it will stay if he has anything to say about it," Madame Dumond mused as she poured coffee into the waxed paper to-go cup before opening the display counter for Dean's Danish. "He has his eye on you."

"You're too romantic. We're colleagues, and barely that." Ella dismissed Madam's response with a shrug, though her heart leapt a little at the thought.

"Only time will tell," Madame replied with her own shrug. "But when I'm right I want details."

"Sure, if you're right I promise, but I'm not going to hold my breath," Ella assured her.

"Just remember a little heartbreak can be good for the soul, and I have a feeling that this charmer could prove to be worth it."

Madame leaned over the counter to pinch Ella's already pink cheek before giving her a wink and returning to her post. Deftly she used the next customer as a way to get the last word, leaving Ella shaking her head in response. It wasn't the first time Madame had served advice along with breakfast, and Ella was sure it wouldn't be the last.

If Madame hadn't been a local institution as well as a close family friend and ally, Ella might've considered arguing more with her. As it was, she knew Madame's heart was in the right place and Ella would only be arguing to convince herself, which would do nothing to convince Madame.

"So, you speak French?" Dean asked, bringing her attention back to him, an amused look on his face.

"Among other languages," she said dismissively, shrugging as shegestured for him to take the last cup and bag, she turned away nonchalantly.

"So what did you talk about?"

Glancing back, she found him grinning in a way that told her that while he didn't understand the words, he was adept enough at reading body language and facial expressions that he had some idea.

"Mostly your ass. She thinks it's cute," Ella said guilelessly as she took a drink and left him to follow.

"And do you?"

"I think you know the status of your ass; you don't need me to inflate your ego any more than it already is."

Taking another sip, she let the silence that fell between the two of them stretch out as she tried to gather her thoughts. She'd played her hand too soon; her faux pas and Madame's teasing had left her thoroughly scrambled. Carefully she lined her thoughts up in a clearer and more coherent manner.

She was certain her instincts were right. There was a reason his family had been pulled into the hunt. Could it be gifts, or the House itself that was being pulled back in? Either way she would need to work through his genealogy in order to know what gifts might run in his family. She would need to find which Line, if any, he came from.

"Look, I want to say I'm really sorry about how I brought up your family and my interest in them," she said carefully as they sat. Dean's face closed off and he leaned away from her, his eyes narrowing warningly.

"Hear me out, please," Ella pleaded as she saw him gathering himself to stand. Without thinking, she put a hand on his arm. He looked down at her hand and back up, his expression telling her she had only minutes to convince him to stay.

"I've been researching Hunters' family trees. There's lore that Hunters are Guardians that at one point or another got out of the family business. Perhaps because they couldn't handle it and didn't have the drive to Hunt or the other interests that allowed them to help from the sidelines. Maybe because both the Guardians' parents died without another family member to take the child in, and they slipped through the fingers of one of the other Houses. We've lost so many Houses in the past century that the last is sadly entirely too possible."

"And you think my family could be one of these families?"

"Yes," she said simply.

"I don't understand why it even matters. Why do you Guardians need a reason for Hunters to hunt?"

The last was said with all the irritation of someone that had been in the middle of the Hunter-Guardian war long enough that he'd been burned by it. It was possible that it came from both sides, but more than likely there had been more problems with the Guardians than the Hunters.

"I don't need a reason for you to hunt, Dean. I need evidence to take to the Guardian Council, a reason to stop the endless bickering between the two sides and finally allow the Hunters to reach their full potential, to give them access to all the things they've been denied."

"I've reached my potential just fine without the help of a Guardian family. If anything, our association with the Guardians has only caused more problems than it ever helped."

Studying her, he could practically see each argument racing through her mind as she discarded them and sifted for another one. He'd have to watch his step again. Being around her was a constant frustration to try and keep up and watch his tongue.

Ella had always been so much like her uncle, something that had Dean's guts churning with fear. Rico had been a brilliant tactician, able to pick and choose the argument that would receive the least amount of resistance within mere seconds. Before you knew what happened you were agreeing with him that the most logical choice was of course his, but he'd been terribly wrong in the end.

" _I'm not going to agree, Ricardo, and that's it,"_ he remembered Eleanor crying. _"You_ _can't meddle with this. If you think for one moment I like the danger that surrounds those girls, you are gravely mistaken, but it is their duty, their task,_ _and_ _you can't save them from what will come. You can talk circles around me in order to get me to agree with you, but ultimately you know it won't do any good. All you will do is complicate things more for them. You can't take this on; for all your talents, my darling boy, it isn't for you to do. Meddling will only backfire and make things more difficult in the long run."_

" _But Ma, you don't understand; you don't know the cost…"_ _Rico began._

" _No more about it Rico. I'm not talking about this with you anymore. Go pester your father if you have to argue with someone."_

Rico's eyes had flashed as she left him, his determined expression only hardening, and he hadn't listened. Instead he'd set off a series of events that had led to death and destruction. In the end, Ella had paid a grave price for her Uncle's choices.


	9. Chapter 9

"I would agree with you, but to force the Council to see that they're being close minded, I have to prove it," Ella said, bringing Dean's attention back to her. He watched as she opened the white paper bag and pulled out her morning croissant. "The two sides have been bickering for too long, and while there are certainly Hunters that are out there that have gone off the rails, there are far more that manage as well as any Guardian. There has to be a reason that some Hunters excel and others either flame out or are dangerous sociopaths."

"And you're basing this off the idea that I'm not a dangerous sociopath? You barely know me."

"True, but I trust my gut on this one," Ella told him, sounding optimistic while she inwardly prayed it was her gut and not her heart or libido that was leading her.

"How is this going to benefit the Hunters? What does it matter? The Guardians are too wrapped up in their bloodlines; all that really matters is that the job gets done."

"Trust me, you have no idea how much I wish they thought the way you do, but you're talking about centuries of doctrines I'm trying to change. I have to provide a significant proof that they're being close minded and short sighted—not exactly an easy thing to do."

"I don't understand what blood has to do with any of it. Who cares?"

"Well apparently, my grandparents left out the basic history when they began training you. How odd." Ella looked at him with a curiosity that made him uncomfortable. "By the way, when were you at the farm? I don't remember you and I lived there from when I was eight to fourteen."

Dean coughed as his vocal chords froze, the effects of Eleanor's spell leaving him feeling as if he'd been grabbed by the throat. He took a drink of his coffee as he forced his mind away from his memories; even thinking the truth was enough to leave him feeling as if his windpipe had been blocked or might very well collapse altogether.

"Are you alright?"

"Yeah, some of the Danish went down wrong," he croaked, taking another drink and waving off her concern. She waited, and unfortunately, he could tell she wasn't about to let the subject go. Carefully he weighed his options. He didn't want to lie to her, but he wasn't certain he had a choice. "It was only off and on for a few years."

He didn't say anything more and she didn't press it. Instead she bypassed it with a shrug and returned to the original subject.

"The Guardians are the descendants of the Watchers. Are you familiar with them?"

Dean studied her, watching as she brightened; she reminded him of Sammy when he'd struck an answer on a particularly hard case.

"Not really."

"If you read the book of Enoch, which is one of the chapters of the Bible that didn't make it into the King James version, you would understand. According to this chapter there were once what was called Watchers. They were angels who were sent to guard and watch over humanity. There was a Garrison devoted to helping protect humans from Lucifer's wrath. However, there were some who fell for having…" she trailed off, as she flushed again. She'd blushed more in the past twenty-four hours than she had in years; it was getting ridiculous. Ella glanced away for a moment before continuing. "Let's say relations with humanity."

"So, the Watchers start shacking up with humans and they create the Guardians? Oh honey, I am one hundred percent sure I'm no angel, but you on the other hand…"

Taking another drink to hide her expression, she wasn't certain whether she should be flattered or not. She reminded herself she couldn't afford to be. Still, she couldn't help the wry smile that ghosted across her lips before she gave him the direct, piercing look that could leave you feeling as if she'd peered into your soul.

"Are you going to ask me next if it hurt when I fell?"

"I tend to be a little smoother than that," he chuckled as he leaned back, his smile warming her.

"I'll keep that in mind," she laughed, ducking her head before shaking it as she realized it was going to be a fight to keep him at arm's length.

"Let me get this straight, the whole basis of the Guardian's blood obsession is that they are descendants of angels that got a little too frisky with the natives. You guys have no delusions of grandeur or anything."

She glanced back up at his statement, thankful for the distraction of his disdain and the opportunity to explain some of what was more than likely his history too.

There was so much he should've been taught, so much that could make his life easier, even if it was just to answer the question of why. Every Guardian and Hunter wondered why—it was only natural—but it helped to understand the true reason, the bargain that had been struck thousands of years before. They were all that stood between the darkness and humanity, they were made to fight, and they'd been born physically, mentally, and emotionally stronger than the average human.

At the same time, it was difficult for Hunters to wrap their brains around the truth of the history. For all the lore they researched and every creature they found that was real, they shunned the idea that they themselves were anything other than normal. It created too many shades of grey. After all, if Hunters and Guardians weren't wholly human, what made them different from the creatures they hunted?

He was the first Hunter she'd had the opportunity to talk to. Her hopes were to eventually bring the Hunters into training as adults with the proper respect for what they could do, but to teach them what they didn't know yet. She respected what could be done with so little formal training and an incredible amount of ingenuity. There were many that managed to get through by quick thinking and by the skin of their teeth, but that didn't mean there weren't things that could make hunting not only easier, it would make it safer.

"Whether or not you believe it, it's true Dean. If you bothered to research it, you would find plenty of lore on it. At least you'd find lore on the Watchers being cast from heaven for improper relations with their charges," she amended. "There is little on it within the Bible itself, but according to our records the time spent among humanity changed the angels. It changed them so drastically that only a handful are allowed to walk among us now and none of them are to remain on earth for long periods of time for fear they'll become equally attached to their charges. Look up the Nephilim."

"Nephilim?"

"The children of the 'sons of God' and the 'daughters of men' according to the book of Enoch, though there were some 'daughters of God' and 'sons of men' thrown in there. The product of these unions were the Guardians."

"And why does it require so much digging to find this information, or any information when it comes to hunting for that matter?" He demanded.

She smiled at his question. He was quick, all right. She wondered how long he'd been chewing on that question, one that obviously pissed him off and had for a while.

"When the world began turning away from magic and the unexplained, instead turning their beliefs to science, the Guardians began changing the history to what it is now. That's why it takes so long for Hunters to sort through the lore; we've intentionally left multiple paths and allowed humanity to create stories or additions to the truth that aren't correct."

"Why?"

Dean leaned forward as he asked the question, his elbows on the table and his hands steepling as he studied her over them.

"Why hide it from humanity? Why allow them to continue to be blinded to the truth?" Ella responded, her voice lively, her eyes filled with light for the topic they discussed. "Because of one very important piece of history. I assume you have heard of the Inquisition?"

"Sure, multiple witch hunts in Europe, and later in America. I did a gig in Salem a few years ago, some stupid kids disturbed the grave of one of the Salem victims; it killed its way through two families out of revenge before I stopped it."

"It's not exactly our shining moment. The Guardians started out with the very noble idea of tracking and targeting all dark witches. These Guardians, my family included, were _purely_ hunting for dark witches, both the demon born and hereditary alike."

"Demon born?"

"Those that get their powers from a pact with a demon," Ella clarified. "Hereditary witches come from the Fae intermingling with humanity. The former are far more dangerous than the latter. If the witch chooses the dark side of magic, they feed off of death and decay. They practice blood magic which requires a tortuous end to their victims to gain more power."

"Do they make any other kind of witch? The only other kind I've come across are the hippy dippy crazies selling crystals."

"Magic is a tool, Dean, neither black nor white. It is the practitioner who chooses the path. It's no different than the gun you're carrying. Our family has a long history of working with hereditary witches in our hunting. They can be very useful and equally as powerful as their dark counterparts, but we're getting off the subject at hand."

Ella fiddled with her croissant, ripping another piece off as she selected her next words carefully.

The darkest part of the Guardians' history had been responsible for the deaths of countless innocents because of the mobs of terrified people. It was a mistake her people still keenly felt, especially when considering the standards they were required to hold themselves to. In so many ways they had to work outside the law and prior to that debacle, they had _been_ the law. If they weren't careful it could lead down a very dark road, as the Inquisition had clearly shown them. The House of Castile had proven exactly where pride combined with power could lead. It was a lesson that couldn't ever be forgotten.

"Unfortunately, the witch hunts got away from the Guardians," Ella sighed, taking a drink and fidgeting as she fought to continue to speak carefully. It was certainly not a proud moment for her people, but she refused to shy away from the subject as so many did. She understood that mistakes were made. At the core, despite what some Guardians might believe, they were as fallible as humanity at large.

"My people weren't prepared for the witches fighting back; we expected that they would attack us directly. As I'm sure you are aware, the other side doesn't play fair. It was a stupid and unbelievably costly mistake. In retaliation, the witches attacked the innocents, decimating thousands, causing pain and suffering to the best of their immense abilities. It had the effect they wanted. The humans panicked and they began fighting as well, unfortunately attacking anything that wasn't strictly human, the Guardians included."

"By attacking the humans, the witches had to know that they were putting themselves at a greater risk."

"Of course, they did, but the Guardians had humans telling them if they thought there might be a witch in their village or town. The Guardians would then seek out the supposed witch and handle it if it was the real deal. By attacking the humans, the way they did had the humans scrambling to defend themselves, but humans have neither the temperament or the training to hunt. It was a calculated risk, one that ended up showing that the Guardians themselves were more than human."

"So, they attacked, expecting to go down either way and if that was going to happen, they'd take the Guardians with them."

"Exactly. The humans didn't have any real idea what they were looking for. Since they didn't have the training, they began making things up. The signs of a witch became downright laughable—that is, if it hadn't been at the expense of so many innocents. The dark witches used the chaos to go underground and effectively force anyone with any abilities underground with them."

Ella didn't break eye contact or so much as blink as she spoke. She paused at the end, however, and looked down. Dean could feel the regret and remorse she felt for something that had happened so long before their birth.

"It's not like it was your fault, Ella."

"You're right, it wasn't my fault."

Looking back up and meeting his eyes, he found a compelling intensity in hers.

"But it is something that could happen again. No Guardian can ever for a moment forget that. What we did got away from us, got out of control, and the fanatics capitalized on it. They didn't just search for witches; instead they looked for heretics. Thousands were tortured before they were either burned or hanged. Thousands that were guilty of nothing more than having a difference in beliefs. It was utilized as an excuse to get back at an enemy or to gain wealth. The good we were trying to do—that we have always tried to uphold—became evil. It's so easy to try to do the right thing for what we believe is the right reasons only to find it twisted into a darkness and barreling down a track we can't control anymore. Anyone can create evil in the name of good, anyone can try to do the right thing for the wrong reasons. Our desitions, must be carefully weighed and thoroughly researched before springing into motion."

"You'd die in the field if you tried to take that approach. Things happen too fast, sometimes all you can do is to try to stay on top of it until the threat is contained and mop up the mess after," Dean replied. "Hindsight is twenty-twenty, foresight is blind. It's easy to look back at that mistake and think it could've all been fixed if we changed one small piece only to find ourselves in a larger mess if we had."

"Maybe," Ella conceded. "Either way the Guardian Council decided it would be in the best interest of innocents and Guardians alike to cloak what we did, to allow humanity to forget the truth and to let them create myths, stories, and legends based off what was really out there."

"Okay, so let's say way back in the day my great, great, however many greats it was…"

"It's a lot; there are plenty who believe the Bible and think that the children of the Watchers were wiped out in the flood. It doesn't exactly say that, though."

"The flood, as in Noah and the animals?"

"As in Noah, the ark, and a pair of every kind of animal."

"How are you going to be able to prove it? We're talking thousands of years."

"I could prove it right now if you wanted," Ella told him, tilting her head and raising an eyebrow as if asking him if he were game. It was a dangerous move with someone like Dean.

"How in the hell do you do that?"

"Give me a few days and I could trace your family history to the last Guardian in your Line. I'm willing to bet just about anything, that eventually I'd hit on a family name that I could tie back to one of the original Houses." At his confused look, she paused to explain. "There are four original houses that stem from either Noah or Aneas of Troy, depending on who is telling the history. Unlike the rest of humanity, the Guardians' histories are not necessarily vague so much as so vast that we no longer know for certain."

"How vast?"

"Let's just say the Library at Alexandria had copies of our records," she said with a shrug, waving it away with her hand and a light shake of her head. "Anyway, it's been too many years since there's been someone who could actually take the time to research the information necessary to know the truth. More than likely it's a combination of both Noah and Aneas."

"You're taking it on faith that a flood actually happened, or Troy actually burned."

"Look it up," she said simply. "Not faith, Dean, truth. If you were researching a case and you came across at least ninety accounts of something humanity believed was a myth, would you believe it was true or would you follow the other ostriches? There are ninety religions and cultures that have a flood myth, one that mirrors the story of Noah. As for Troy, there is archaeological evidence that it did at one point exist in Hissarlik, Turkey."

She let the silence once again fall between them. He studied her, trying to figure out exactly how much of what she'd told him she believed. Returning his look without so much as a flinch, he knew she believed every word. What he had to decide is if she was delusional, misled, or if she was telling him the truth. It was a bit of a terrifying prospect.

"We can sit here and discuss this for hours if you'd like. After all, it's the job I'm training for," Ella told him with the same sweet smile she'd given him last night, and damn it, it still made his heart skip a beat. "How about instead I offer you a trade."

"What trade?"

"Part of my plans are to research the Hunters' family lines. If I can start with yours, there're plenty of incentives that could come out of it."

"What do you mean?"

"You think the Guardians are able to work as easily as they do because they're lucky? You have no idea the toys or the wealth that the Houses have, and by wealth, I mean both knowledge and money.

Some of the Lost Houses have security boxes, vaults, and bank accounts that are lying untouched because there's no one left to claim them."

"What's kept other Houses from claiming it?"

"It takes a blood tie to access these things, a complete blood tie. This tie is generated hereditarily from which bloodline you have the greatest or strongest connection to. The Lost Houses are entire bloodlines that have been wiped from the earth. Your blood chooses your House and without that claim, the heirlooms of the House can't be touched. Old World magic was used to ensure it. The original Elders made certain each House was carefully guarded to keep all other Houses from being able to steal from another house, or Heaven forbid, the rare but real possibility of fighting among the Guardian Houses for certain tools or wealth."

"Are you saying that there might be a Gringott's vault out there with my name on it?"

"Did you really just make a Harry Potter reference?"

She choked on her coffee before laughing. To his surprise her laugh came out rich and throaty, with a bawdy promise to it he wouldn't have guessed she was capable of.

"Maybe," he replied with a touch of defensiveness.

"Okay," she chuckled, shaking her head before responding to his original question. "I'm saying it's a good possibility."

"And if there isn't?"

"Then I can offer you the protection of my House, which is old and exceedingly respected, along with my expertise at your disposal."

"What exactly does your expertise entail? What makes you think I need you?"

"You really don't think Jessi saved your ass from the _Rusalka_ all on her own, do you?" she asked, leaning forward.

"Alright, so what exactly would we be trading?"

"Training," Ella said coolly.

"Training?" Dean asked, drawing the word out as if looking for a hidden meaning in it. "What kind of training? If you have all the answers, what could I possibly teach you?"

"Fighting," she said simply. At his raised eyebrows, she explained. "It's been years since I fought and as you so kindly pointed out to my cousin, I'm a sitting duck. I may not have the need to fight, the drive to go mano-a-mano with the creatures you and Jessi fight, but that doesn't mean I should be defenseless. I don't want to solely rely on someone else to protect me if something comes after me. I'd like to at the very least be able to hold my own until the cavalry arrives."

He studied her a moment. It was more than likely, absolutely, the worst idea. It obviously wouldn't be the first time they'd trained together, though last time she'd had far more experience with fighting than he had. Part of him couldn't help but be intrigued by the idea of the tables being turned and that this time he would get to be the one handing her, her ass.

His eyes traveled up and down her, appraising her for more than her attractiveness. This time he appraised her strength, fitness level, and remembered the grace she'd moved with. The fight in the ally had been a travesty. If he'd wanted to kill her, it would've been simple.

However, she could still think quickly and turn opportunity to her advantage. There was some training left, enough to begin to assert itself once she began working at it again.

Still, he was already having a hard-enough time keeping his hands off her. The intimacy of training her was only going to put them in far more compromising positions than they'd already been in. He wasn't certain he'd be able to keep things strictly professional and he couldn't afford strings.

Jessi could and would certainly work with her cousin; she could train Ella just as well as he could and it would allow him to keep his distance. He could guide from the sidelines at least until he was sure that Ella had the skills to protect herself. Once they hit that point, he'd be free. He could head out on the road and lose himself in hunting for a few months.

"Why aren't you asking your cousin?"

"Are you afraid to fight with a girl?"

His eyes narrowed as he looked at her, and she returned his gaze unflinchingly. It was disconcerting that she still knew exactly what button to push. If he were honest, the answer would of course be no, but there was so much more to it.

Glancing out the window, he rubbed his chin as he bit his lip against the first six retorts that came to mind. More than anything he wanted to fight with her, to train her, to feel her body against his—it bothered him how much he wanted it. As a rule, he wouldn't be over thinking it like this; he would've even enjoyed it and worked it to his advantage, but things were too complicated with Ella.

"No, I've worked with Jessi. I just can't help but wonder why you wouldn't ask the home team to work with you before going to an outsider," he offered, his gaze returning to hers, emerald clashing with jade and amber. "Since I've worked with Jessi I know exactly how good she is; I know she's more than capable of teaching you."

"That's where you're wrong," Ella replied, leaning on the table toward him. "Jessi can't train me because she's too afraid of hurting me. I was attacked at fourteen by a hell hound, it's poison almost killed me, and it took down my uncle and grandfather. Between the trauma of their deaths and my illness I've lost pieces of my memories. Ever since then, my family has treated me like I'm fragile and weak, like the slightest confrontation will either kill me or leave me stark raving mad. Jessi is so afraid of losing me she can't hurt me."

"And you want me to hurt you?" Dean asked with dry, self-deprecating amusement. "There are so many openings there, where to even start."

"Can you be a little serious here? I need someone that won't hold back, someone who can teach me because they want me to be able to defend myself, truly, and they know that holding back could get me killed. We both know the other side isn't going to hold back on me. I have to know how to take a hit and how to give one."

He sat back, studying her, and he couldn't say she was wrong. The whole reason he was having a difficult time walking away was because he couldn't be sure the Jameson's could protect her. He knew Jessi would get herself killed if it meant keeping Ella safe, but he couldn't be sure about the rest of the family. He couldn't be sure that they wouldn't get Ella killed trying to keep her in the dark and "protected".

The Jameson's were full of good intentions, but everyone knew where that road led, and unfortunately the family couldn't seem to learn their lesson. The kicker, of course, was the pleading look in Ella's eyes. Even when he'd been dead set on treating her like a snot nosed brat, he hadn't been able to resist that look.

"Sure Angel, we can go a few rounds."

"Why does that make me feel dirty?" Ella asked, wrinkling her nose at his response and teasing a real smile and chuckle from him. "And don't call me Angel."

"Sure Angel, whatever you say."

Shooting him a glare as she stood, she chose not to argue. Ella preferred to win an argument and there was no way to win this one. Instead she picked up the bag that still sat on the table between them, and Jessi's now cold mocha before she tossed away her empty cup and waved at Madame Dupond as they left.

Silence fell between them as they waked for more than a block, Dean slowing as they reached a black Chevy Impala. For a moment that same pain she was becoming all to used to stabbed between her eyes and she could hear the motor would make, despite the fact Dean had moved to the passenger door, keys still in his hand.

Shaking her head to clear it she eyed the car. If she had to guess she'd say it was a late sixties model, but she couldn't be one hundred percent sure. It'd been years since she'd paid attention to a car that closely.

"Is this your car?" she asked, as a feeling of familiarity that was tugged at her, making her wonder if she'd seen this same car before, or just one very similar.

Coincidences were often what civilians told themselves happened to explain away what they didn't want to see, she reminded herself. Deja vu and coincidences very rarely actually ended up being the explanation in her world.

"Yeah, we may as well take it back to the bar. I don't want to leave her here."

"I don't blame you; she's a beauty. Not exactly an inconspicuous ride, but a beauty."

"She's family."

Many might've been confused by his simple statement. To them it would've been nothing more than a car and they wouldn't have been able to understand the sentiment. Her grandfather had loved cars, and they'd spent their road trips going to various training hunts, playing "guess the make, model, and year of the cars on the road". Grandda had owned a '68 Cougar that Nana had complained he loved more than he loved her.

"The best ones always are," she responded, teasing another smile out of him as she slipped past him and sat in the passenger seat. It had the smell of an old car: a combination of grease and gasoline, along with the other fluids riding just under their scent. The smell of leather and leather conditioner as well as the pristine condition of the interior told her how hard he worked to maintain the classic car.

Dean shut her door and walked around the car before sliding into the driver's seat. As he shut his door he leaned closer the scent of his soap mingling with the other scents of his car in a surprisingly attractive combination. turning the key in the ignition.

She tried to ignore it and her response to it as the car roared to life. Trying to keep from meeting Dean's eye she looked around the car for a distraction. There was an old army duffle laying across the back seat along with a cooler, and her vision blurred for a moment. The sound of the engine, the duffle in the back, and the eyes of the man next to her as they glanced at her all combined causing a stabbing pain to her temple.

"You were there," Ella cried suddenly, the memory of the boy, the one that she hadn't remembered, but who had looked at her as if she should've overwhelming her. "You were at the farm the day I woke up from the hell hound attack."

Dean's heart stopped in his chest and he had to force himself to take a deep breath to steady himself before he looked back at her.

"Yeah," he admitted finally.


	10. Chapter 10

"Why were you there?" Ella demanded. "And why did you act like I should've known you? Why were you so upset that I didn't?"

He fought to think as rapidly as possible; the parameters of the spell kept them from telling Ella anything she didn't already know. He couldn't answer her questions, but the fact that she was asking them made him think that perhaps Jessi's desperate plan might, in fact, be working.

"Ah," he said, clearing his throat before picking his words carefully. He would have to lead her to answering her questions herself. "My father was called in after the attack."

"Did I know you?" Ella demanded. "Before the attack, had I met you and I just don't remember it?"

Dean couldn't respond, but when he looked at her, she could see the answer in his eyes. Her vision blurred again and her head pounded. Flashes of the boy Dean had been flickered through her mind too quickly for her to grasp them.

He pulled the car quickly into the first parking spot at Jameson's and cut the engine. Leaning over, he put a hand on her shoulder, and her body trembled under it.

"Are you alright?"

When she looked up, there were tears welling from her eyes and slipping down her deathly pale face; even her lips were without color. There was pain in her eyes as she rubbed at her forehead.

"Yeah, I get headaches when I try to remember the past," she replied, shaking her head and rubbing at her temple. "I'll get some medicine when we get upstairs."

"Maybe we should wait until you're feeling better."

"No," she snapped, desperation in her voice.

Her hands were balled into fists in her lap and he could see her fighting to restrain herself from hitting the first thing she saw. He was thankful for it, especially since she was looking at his dash. He was at a loss for words; there was so much he wished he could tell her, but he couldn't. "I was at the farm when you were there, wasn't I? That's why you were upset I didn't know you. I forgot you and I'm betting your brother too, since he's only four years younger, because of the poison."

"Yes," he admitted as she continued to stare out the windshield. After a moment, she wiped irritably at the tears that she couldn't stop. The stabbing pain in her head was powerful. Closing her eyes against the early morning glare, she pushed away her curiosity.

"No one has ever lost their memory to a hell hound attack," she said woodenly, refusing to look at him. She wasn't even certain why she was telling him about the research she hadn't told anyone about. "I'm certainly not the first person to be scratched by one, but I'm the first to have this reaction."

"Hey, you said it yourself. It wasn't just the poison. Your uncle and grandfather died protecting you, and that's a trauma that's difficult to get past. I've met plenty of people who have repressed memories for far less of a good reason."

"I suppose," she sighed, shaking her head and getting out of the car. "Except most Guardians don't repress trauma; it's not how we're made. We can't continue to fight this war if we forget every traumatic recollection. We'd end up with no memory, since our lives end up being one great big traumatic memory. I guess it's just proof that I'm not made to be in the field."

Following Ella as she led him to the back alley and the service door that led into the kitchen, he fought with his own anger. Thanks to Eleanor Jameson, she truly blamed herself, as ifthere was something wrong with her, something broken in here and that's why she couldn't remember. How in the hell did he tell her it wasn't something broken in her? Yes, she'd been tainted by what had attacked her, but it wouldn't surprise him if she could use it against what had tried to kill her.

More than anyone he understood what had prompted Jessi into pushing so desperately for Ella to get her memories back. It wasn't that the will to fight had been stripped if that had been the case then she would've shunned all hunting completely. She certainly wouldn't be contesting the ban like she was, and she wouldn't be seeking someone to train her to fight. No, all Eleanor had accomplished was repressing Ella's will.

It was part of what he'd argued with Eleanor after Ella had woken up without her memories. If anyone had the will power to use the evil in them against what had poisoned them it was Ella. He couldn't help the admiration of how she'd continued to fight even if she didn't understand it, or realize that she even was fighting.

Ella opened the door leading into the pub's kitchen and headed through the dimness of the usually bright room. Before long the staff would start to arrive, the silent room would fill with light and noise, enough you would barely be able to hear yourself think.

"Should we be concerned about any noise from training that might worry the staff or any family members?"

Ella glanced back at him and couldn't help the smile that slipped across her face at his worried expression; Looking quickly at her watch, she shook her head.

"No, Jessi's at the gym right now, though she trains at home too, so it's unlikely the staff will think anything of it. There are plenty of times that Jem and Jessi have gone head to head, which meant the thumps and scuffling won't be anything new. There was some guy at the gym that Jessi's been toying with so I'd expect her to be gone at least another hour. Jem wasn't supposed to work last night He ended up stuck here because of family business, which means he'll be in late this afternoon to make it up to his wife."

Dean only nodded as he followed her through the kitchen to the back stairs and watched as she jogged up the stairs. It was hard not to; all things considered it was a fantastic view, but more importantly by the time she reached the top she was neither winded nor tired. It showed him she stayed in shape despite her lack of combat training.

He followed her down the hallway until they reached the end where she took her keys from her pocket and unlocked the door. She gestured for him to walk ahead of her, and he complied as he shoved his hands into his pockets, she followed close behind. He heard the door shut as he took a good look at the apartment both Ella and Jessi called home.

It was keyhole shaped, with a living room to his right with a large old fashioned leaded window and a French door that opened onto a scrolled iron balcony. To his left was a training area complete with weights, a punching bag, padded helmets, gloves, and a roll of tape.

As the room curved, he saw the doorway to a bathroom, a hallway that led to a couple more rooms, and finally a doorway in the secondary curve into the kitchen. The floors were old warm-colored wood, darkened with an aging that told him it was the original flooring; the kitchen and bathroom were black and white tiled.

There was a riot of different shades of blue, purple, and green, from the deep forest of the velvet on the couch to the same velvet in a rich sapphire on the wing backed chair that sat next to it, to the eggplant of the soft throw blanket tossed over the chair's back.

Softer shades of the same tones were picked up in the throw pillows and pictures hanging on the walls. Everything ringed the wood burning fireplace and looked comfortable, inviting even.

He was unused to the urge to curl up on a couch and watch the fire crackle, but for a moment he entertained the idea As a general rule, he was lucky if there was a clean and semi comfortable bed for him to catch a few hours of sleep on before he was needed elsewhere; anything else was just gravy. He only had vague memories of a home. He'd been so young when his mother had died, and it'd only leftimpressions at this point rather than actual memories.

There was a table situated in the middle of the curve of furniture, a sturdy antique with elegant lines. Despite the obvious age, it gleamed with the shine of something that had obviously been well taken care of and appreciated. Small tables—he couldn't remember what they were called—sat at each end of the couch and the opposite side of the chair. They mimicked the wood and the lines of the larger table.

On either side of the fireplace were ceiling to floor bookshelves. Books and knickknacks haphazardly covered each shelf as if they still were used, keeping it from looking too much like a library and instead creating a lived-in atmosphere.

"Can I have your coat, or do you prefer to fight in it?" Ella asked as he wandered to the bookshelves, curiously picking up a small iridescent crystal ball from its place next to a book written in a language he didn't recognize.

Ella smiled; she'd been amused to see the book written in Gaelic by a Guardian long since detailing the various genera of the Fae beside a crystal ball. Natural ability to scry, whether it be by crystal, water, fire or pendulum came from the Fae blooded. She knew Dean had no idea as he set the crystal back in its stand and looked back to her.

"No, it's easier to fight without it, though it's not always a choice," he said as he shrugged off his coat and handed it to her. She placed it beside her own on a fanciful coat rack created out of a many headed dragon, each head a hook. "It's best to be prepared to fight in anything. You never know when something that you're hunting might realize it and take it into its head to hunt you back. As a rule, it happens before you even realize what you're hunting."

"So Murphy's Law applies to Guardians and Hunters as well as the general population."

"Murphy's Law enjoys kicking me in the teeth with regularity," Dean told her. "If it can go wrong, it usually does, and it's best to expect it to."

"Good to know," Ella replied, rubbing her suddenly sweaty palms on her jeans and waiting for him to tell her what to do. "Not that I'll end up in the field, but it certainly gives me perspective on those I'm trying to help."

Dean took his gun from his hip, dropping the magazine and ejecting the loaded round before replacing the bullet and setting it on the bookshelf.

"Well, I guess we should get started," Dean said, turning back around to face her. He stepped into the training area, gesturing for her to follow.

"Yeah, I guess we should."

"The first things first, can you throw a punch, and preferably not throw one like a girl."

"Like this?" She asked sweetly as she moved into range and threw a surprisingly swift punch with a good amount of momentum behind it. He grabbed it out of the air and looked at her fisted hand; she remembered more than they wanted her to. While her hand was much smaller than his own, it was fisted correctly, her thumb tucked properly to keep from breaking it.

"Take your rings off, Angel. While they can be an advantage in the fight, I don't want to be cut up by them and you haven't toughened your hands up enough not to hurt them if you land a punch."

" _If_ I land a punch? I may not have trained in a while, but I'm not completely incompetent," she growled as she reluctantly pulled her rings from her fingers and slid them into her pocket. "And could you please stop calling me Angel?"

She wasn't certain which bothered her more: how easily he'd plucked her fist from the air, or the annoying nickname he seemed intent on calling her.

"Why does it bother you?" There was teasing light in his eyes, one that made it into a flirtation rather than simple teasing.

"It doesn't matter. You're here to teach me to fight, not to irritate the snot out of me."

"Ah, but you see, irritating you—while interesting—also has the benefit of pulling you off your guard. Some people use anger to focus them, but if you're like your cousin, then it's possible anger can distract you."

"You're full of shit; Jessi gets more focused the angrier she gets, at least in a fight. Now, arguing with me, she gets led in circles until she can't remember which way is up and which is down," Ella replied as she pivoted, her body moving without thinking as he began to circle her. Instinctively she moved to continue facing him no matter which way he shifted.

It was interesting that she remembered how Jessi fought. She didn't realize it, but it was one more memory slipping out of the Pandora's Box Eleanor had created. Only remembering fighting with Jessi directly would've given her that information. The dulling of her senses wouldn't have left her imagining fighting against Jessi, or how to defend against her, or even how Jessi reacted in the heat of the moment. It had to be something Ella remembered.

There were far more instincts left than even Jessi knew, Dean realized, as she threw another punch. This time he blocked her with his forearm and sent a test punch toward her face. She deflected slower than she should've, but with apparent skill. In a fight with a civilian she'd rock it, but against creatures unnaturally strong and fast, the only way she'd walk away was by pure luck.

They continued to circle each other, Dean testing her with feints. Her footwork was still good; she moved quickly, sidestepping, but if they went full speed, it was likely she'd be in trouble. However, the general movement was as it should be. When he pivoted into a kick, she dodged—just barely—but her muscle memory was still there.

"Not bad, but you're rusty and you need to be faster. When did you stop training?"

"Three years ago," Ella replied, watching him closely and dodging what she thought was another punch. Instead, as she was off balance, he grabbed her wrist, pulling her against him. Instinctively, she twisted her wrist and jerked down, pulling it free, if only for a moment. He moved like quicksilver, trapping both of her wrists with his hands. She threw her weight back and kicked, connecting with his chest and using the movement to free her wrists again, but the move unbalanced them both.

He pulled her forward, cushioning her fall, so that she landed on top of him, but the game wasn't over. Moving as quickly as possible she tried to roll free, but he was on top of her before she had the chance. They lay there for a moment, his body pinning hers, and once again his body pressed intimately against her.

"You know, I didn't ask you to train me as a ploy to get closer to you," she said softly, trying not to notice the gold rings that circled the green in his eyes and the thickness of his lashes fanning across his cheeks as his eyes fell to her lips. "Let me up."

To her surprise, he relented, rolling off and standing in one graceful move before holding out a hand to help her up.

"Was it a ploy on your part when you accepted?" she demanded.

"Not entirely. I fully intend to teach you to defend yourself, but that doesn't mean I'm not going to take advantage of the situation... probably."

"Why?"

He looked surprised at her question. It told her he didn't spend a lot of time with girls that cared to even wonder why, let alone bother to ask. They circled each other warily before he threw another punch that she dodged and twisted his arm up with hers, using his momentum to throw him toward the wall.

Catching himself with a loud thump, he wheeled around, coming for her again. This time he caught her around the waist as she tried to evade him and avoided the instep stomp, but not the elbow to the solar plexus. It loosened his grip for only a moment before he locked his arms around her, turning her and pinning her against the wall. Ineffectually, she pushed against him before he swiftly used his much larger hand, pinning both her slender wrists above her head and incapacitating her completely. For the second time that day she found herself trapped between a wall and Dean's body.

"I wish I knew," he replied, surprising both with his truthful response. Meeting his gaze she found there was something in his eyes, something she'd seen earlier in her memory when she'd asked who he was at the farm. was a warmth, an interest, a depth of feeling she couldn't place or understand.

He dipped his head and once again his lips met hers as her eyes fluttered shut. His free hand cupped her jaw, his thumb gently caressing her cheek. They both knew that she'd been lying when she'd said she hadn't asked him to train her without the thought of being closer to him. They both knew she'd wanted the physical intimacy that fighting with him would undoubtedly create **,** and they also both knew she wasn't about to admit it. It would give him too much control and she was afraid of giving him that kind of hold on her.

It still didn't stop Ella from losing herself in his kiss and wishing for more. It left her with the distinct impression that they'd gone through this dance before. His hand let go of hers, trailing a burning path down her sides to where they fisted in her shirt. She found his touch was as familiar as his eyes had been in the Impala. The stray thought that he'd definitely improved since the last time slipped in and out of her mind before she could even really register it.

Jessi grimaced as she saw the Impala parked in front of Jameson's. Dean couldn't have picked a more conspicuous spot if he'd tried. She couldn't help the spark of temper that had the wheels of her Jeep squealing as she pulled into her own spot. Normally her workout would've at least helped smooth out the edges of her anger from the night before, but no matter how hard she pushed herself, she hadn't been able to burn it off. The more she thought about what Ella had kept from her, the more she simmered. Her anger had spilled over onto Jem although logically she knew it'd been Ella and Ella alone that should've told her. No matter what reasons either one of them had to keep the danger her cousin could be in out of their talks, she'd deserved to have known all of it up front.

As frustrated as she was, Jessi knew her cousin might deserve her wrath, but it wouldn't do any good to fight with her. Ella would stand by her decision bullheadedly no matter what Jessi said at this point. It was just her luck that Dean had offered a perfect scapegoat to take the edge off the anger she hadn't been able to let go of. Her smile spread with a wicked gleam as she snatched up her workout bag and stalked out of her car.

"Damn Dean Winchester," she muttered. "Does whatever he wants and to hell with any warnings I might give him, to hell with the fact that he could bring the whole family down on us. What do I know?"

She'd told him in no uncertain terms to stay off her uncle's radar; she couldn't have been any clearer if she'd included pictures **or** an informational film, the damn Neanderthal. Jessi's eyes swept the parking lot around the pub, leaving her hissing out a breath. It wasn't entirely in relief, at least not yet.

At this point it was a vain hope that Jem hadn't gotten in earlier than expected. Just last night she'd been counting on Jem leaving before the night shift but that hadn't happened. She couldn't count on the fact that just because Jem's car wasn't in its usual spot, he wasn't on the premises.

Seeing no sign of Dean in the restaurant, she headed for the back stairs with a thudding heart, desperately praying her uncle hadn't already gotten ahold of Dean. No matter how she tried to spin it, there was no excuse she could make that would explain Dean's continued presence.

Her only hope was that Dean had been able to lie smoothly through those pearly whites of his, pearly whites she had every intention of bloodying for not listening to her.

As she hit the last couple steps at the top of the stairs, she heard banging coming from down the hall in the direction of the apartment. Her heart stopped, even as she reminded herself that Ella shouldn't be home. Her heart thudded painfully as it started again, adrenaline sliding through her veins, giving her the ability to move. Instantly she hopped the last couple stairs and looked to her Uncle's office to find the door was shut and there was no light coming from underneath it.

Glancing apprehensively down the hall, she knew with everything in her that Ella was in that apartment. Jessi wasn't certain what would've kept her cousin from her classes, but she now had a pretty good idea of why Dean's car was in front of the pub. She could only be thankful that there was someone with Ella that could help her.

Desperately, she fought to think of what could've possibly gotten into the pub let alone the apartment. The base wards should keep most anything dangerous from getting into the pub let alone the apartment. That thought was enough to send chills down her spine. She didn't have time to contemplate it; the scuffling sounds of fighting only barely muffled by the door spurred her on. Sprinting lightly down the hall, she pulled her knife and flicked her wrist to open it as she threw open the door ready to lend her skills to Dean's aide.

The scene that greeted her had her stopping dead and her mouth dropping open. Completely dumbfounded, she could only watch as Ella elbowed Dean in the midsection, managing to gain her freedom for mere seconds before Dean's arms locked around her.

They were too distracted by the fight to even hear her come through the door, regardless of the fact it'd crashed into the wall hard with a thud. She slapped a hand on the door as it dented the wall before bouncing back at her. Everything was happening so fast she couldn't even begin to process it, let alone react to it.

Dean twisted Ella and shoved her back against the wall. Jessi could see both their lips moving, but didn't hear the conversation through the furious roaring in her own ears.

What in the hell did Dean think he was doing? He'd said he was going to protect Ella, and this sure as hell wasn't her idea of protecting. She could still see Ella's lips moving and hear the rumble of Dean's voice, but she was springing into action, moving to protect her cousin from the very man she'd thought she could trust to do that for her.

Dean pinned Ella's hands above her head and Jessi found herself once again stopped cold, frozen in mid-stride by the sight of Dean's head dropping and his lips meeting Ella's. As she watched in shock, Ella's eyes fluttered shut. Jessi was struck by the confusion of emotions that swirled through both Ella and Dean, forcing her to fight to block the onslaught of sensations. There was no doubt the kiss was by no means unwanted by either party.

"What in God's name is going on?" her voice was about two octaves higher than normal, and whether it was from anger or shock, she wasn't sure. Kicking the door to their apartment closed behind her, she watched through narrowed eyes as they guiltily jumped apart.

Jessi wasn't certain whether to be furious or amused.

"Um, we're training," Ella responded, her eyes not quite meeting Jessi's. Jessi glanced over at Dean, who shoved his hands in his pockets while he tried to appear nonchalant. His face was blank, in an expression Jessi knew well. He was trying desperately to hide or bury his emotions. She noted he wouldn't meet her eyes either.

Jessi gripped her knife hard and took a deep breath, fighting to get control now that she realized there was nothing to fear. Carefully closing the knife and sliding it back into her pocket, she began stripping off her coat.

"Training?" She asked, her voice suspiciously light.

Jessi threw her coat haphazardly onto the coat rack, not even bothering to see if it landed as she crossed her arms, her eyebrows raising. "What kind of training would that be?"

"Fighting," Ella sighed, her head dipping as Jessi watched with interest at the blush that spread across her cheeks.

"Oh honey, I don't know what he told you, but that isn't fighting."

"Aren't you home early?" Ella snapped as she pulled her composure together and met Jessi's gaze finally, her own eyes flashing irritably.

"Aren't you supposed to be in class?" Jessi returned.

"Since when did you become my mother, Jessi?" Ella ground out between clenched teeth.

Jessi just stared back at her cousin as she tilted her head questioningly. Her eyes shifted briefly to Dean for a second, but he looked as though he'd prefer the floor open and swallow him alive rather than get involved in the conversation.

"We're more than just roommates, Ella. I think as your family and your partner I deserve a bit more explanation than that," Jessi responded, a small smile dancing around the corners of her mouth, though it did nothing to soften the bite of her tone.

Jessi couldn't help her amusement as she watched Ella's mouth open and close, but nothing came out. After a moment of looking like a landed fish, her lips thinned as she tried unsuccessfully to find a suitable response. It was rare for Ella to be speechless and Jessi couldn't stop herself from letting her irritation completely slip in favor of her entertainment at the sight.

There was anger brewing in Ella's eyes, more than likely at not only getting caught kissing Dean, but then not being able to formulate a response. Apparently Dean had skills. Not that it was a surprise to Jessi, she'd seen his effect on many a waitress, but to leave Ella with her wits scattered, fighting for words, was truly impressive.

In frustration, Ella snatched up the nearest thing, which happened—thankfully—to be just a boxing glove and hurled it. Jessi laughed at the uncharacteristically juvenile response as she caught the glove inches from her face and tossed it aside.

"Be thankful that's all I threw," Ella snapped as she picked up a water bottle and took a deep drink, unable to find any way to play it off.

"You know, all you had to do was ask and I would've been more than happy to start training with you again," Jessi said with reproach in her voice.

"It's too hard fight with you. I need someone I can't anticipate, so I know for a fact that I'm being pushed to my limit. I think you go too easy on me," Ella retorted coolly, her gaze holding Jessi's levelly.


	11. Chapter 11

Jessi raised a brow at her, but didn't respond. Ella was probably right, though Jessi hated to admit it, her cousin knew how she moved, the way her mind worked and because of it could anticipate her attacks. There was a flash of surprise and pride that Ella had worked it out for herself even before Jessi had.

Working with Dean hadn't been a bad idea, in fact it was a stroke of genius, but Jessi wasn't certain that leaving them alone and unsupervised was a good plan. She knew far too well how the man worked. After all, if Dean had been anyone else there was a good chance she would've played his game.

"So Dean, what part of inconspicuous didn't you get? Go move your damn car. Somewhere that isn't right in front of Jameson's." she growled at him.

"Damn," Dean muttered, just barely holding back a snappy retort. As much as he hated to admit it, Jessi was right. It wouldn't go well if anyone discovered he was there.

If he hadn't been so worried about Ella, he would've thought of it himself. The last thing any one of them needed was the Jameson's wading into the middle of everything. Besides both girls were simmering and heading for full boil. He loved a good cat fight as much as the next guy, but he also knew when it would likely boil over and get him burned in the process.

Electing to stay out of the line of fire he took his coat from the rack, slipping his keys from his pocket, and headed out the door trying to draw as little attention to himself as possible.

Silence fell in the room while the girls looked at each other, Ella with a defiance that warmed Jessi's heart even though she returned it with a single raised eyebrow and not an ounce of mercy. Jessi stood with her hip cocked and her arms akimbo, Ella mirrored her stance after a moment without even realizing she was doing it.

"I'm surprised you're not chasing after him to read him the riot act like you did last night." Ella finally said wryly, predictably tiring of the standoff before her cousin.

"Apparently he's useful," Jessi replied with an irritable shrug.

"Only so far as he pointed out the danger that you didn't want to see…"

"A danger you should've told me about Ella." Jessi snapped cutting her cousin off.

"You're right I probably should've, but can you blame me for not telling you?" Ella demanded, throwing her hands up and picking up her water again. "All of you, from Jem to Nana to Aunt Ellen and right down the line to you have kept me swaddled like a helpless baby. None of you can even give me credit for the brains of a child or the capability of anything more than a newborn one at that. If I'd told you from the beginning you would've backed off. I'd have been forced to do this alone."

"You think I'd leave you alone to bull headedly ignore the danger and get yourself deeper in trouble than you can possibly get out of without me there?"

Jessi looked at her cousin in genuine shock. Ella let a growl of frustration loose and turned away. Jessi just watched her as she took another drink trying to contain herself but apparently Ella had been pushed too far. Instead of throwing the punch she so obviously wanted to, she hurled the bottle of water at the wall hard enough the plastic cracked and water spewed in a waterfall over the weights.

It was interesting that Jessi's usually calm, collected, and rational to a fault cousin was throwing things in her irritation. Dean had riled her up that was for certain.

"Damn it Jessi. That right there is the problem. Do you even hear yourself? The trouble I'd bull headedly get into? Really who in the hell are you talking about? You or me? Did you forget that my job is going to be to try to foresee the trouble you could get into and keep you safe?"

"Mama called us two sides of the same coin Ella, we might have our differences, but you're no less stubborn than I am. There's no way I could, let alone would, leave you alone in this."

"No instead you'd try to force me to be something I'm not, something I can't even remember being. Do you think it's easy for me to have my memory gone? Do you think I enjoy people remembering the Guardian I once showed every indication of being? The person everyone wanted me to be? Ever since Rico died I've had everyone's disappointment shoved down my throat. I'm a disappointment to my blood and to everything my family expected me to be. Do you think there is anything I wouldn't give to be the Guardian I was supposed to be?"

"Ella…"

"No Jessi, I am what I am and I can only do what I am doing. I'm trying to move on with my life from what was and make something out of what is. I'm trying desperately to make peace with both sides of me. I need you in my life. I still have a need to keep you safe, so let me do it. Let me be a partner in the only way I have left open to me and stop fighting me. We both know there's no other choice unless you want me out of the family business forever."

Ella stood feet from her cousin practically shaking with emotion, the war she'd been fighting inside thanks to all of the Jamesons so plain on her face it stabbed at Jessi's heart. There was obviously confusion, intense conflict, and Jessi could see now the desperate wishes that were tearing Ella apart.

Looking up to blink back the rush of tears, Jessi bit her lip, she'd been no better than her aunt. The pain the woman had caused her cousin from childhood had given her little love for Ella's mother. There had been little interest beyond the Guardian Ella would become and when that was taken away her aunt had shunned her daughter entirely. There had been too many times she'd seen that mix of failure and sorrow on Ella's face because of Delphine. It nearly broke her heart to see she'd caused the same feelings.

"I can't be what you want, I'm sorry Jessi."

But Ella could, Jessi wanted to scream. It was there just under the surface; she could see it. She'd seen it in Ella as she'd fought Dean, she'd been slow and out of practice but it was still there. All she could do was bite her lips against the words that she wanted to say, the words she couldn't say, because even if she could they would only confuse Ella further. They would only create more of the same emotions in Ella that she had already inadvertently caused.

"I know Ella," she replied crossing the remaining distance between them and wrapping her arms around Ella. "I'm sorry."

Ella stood stiffly until after a moment she relented.

"Stop treating me like a feeble child Jessi, stop treating me like I'm helpless."

"I know you're not helpless, but I just can't lose you. I just can't " she whispered. She pulled back enough to look at Ella her eyes pleading for understanding. "We'll work on training you and when I'm not here, someone else will be. Someone we can trust to protect you."

The door opened and Jessi watched as Dean walked back into the apartment. His eyes narrowed on the two of them but he said nothing as Jessi gave him a small watery smile and a light nod. The sight of him had her wondering if she'd been looking at the situation all wrong.

To be sure, she carefully reached out with her gift, bringing down the walls she had painstakingly learned to build. Slowly and gently reaching out she found something simmering between them that was far more than the lust that had originally struck her.

Only an idiot wouldn't have been able to see the sparks flying between them. However, there was something hovering just at the edges that had her wondering if Dean hadn't gotten over Ella any more than Ella had gotten over him. Jessi could sense something deeper, something that was stronger than attraction. Something that made her wonder if she should reconsider her stance on Dean keeping his distance.

She'd been worried about Ella's heart and the naiveté that couldn't be helped. She'd been worried about the effects of the past that Ella couldn't remember, a past that Dean most certainly could. The emotions that had slammed into her the moment she'd opened the door had been complicated, but there was promise. Maybe she should step back and see where things went.

Of course she would have to feel things out, make sure to nudge Dean into getting out of his own way, but she could trust him to keep Ella safe. Not even her wily uncle had the capacity that Dean had to protect her cousin.

Jem had once said he'd wished he'd gotten his hands on Dean to train. A teacher only got a few truly talented pupils and Dean had a raw talent that had made Jem wish he could be the one to hone that gift. There was the added bonus that Dean could afford a ruthlessness and a single mindedness that Jem couldn't. Her uncle was required to take into account the welfare of the entire family over the welfare of the one. Dean had no such restrictions.

Their first hunt was coming up and Ella was nowhere near ready physically to protect herself. Jessi couldn't trust the family to really protect Ella. Part of her was afraid that Nana was setting them up to fail. There was a nearly fanatical need to see the girls banned forever. There was no telling exactly what she might unleash to get her way.

Granted Nana would rationalize it by saying she was just trying to keep Ella safe, but really there had been a few screws loose in Nana since Grandda and Rico's deaths. She no longer thought in the rational and clearly logical way she once had.

Jessi was going to have to be on her guard. Their grandmother was quite capable of doing something that could wind up getting both of the girls and anyone involved with them hurt, without ever truly seeing the end result of her actions. She couldn't be sure that there was anything Nana might stop at doing to get her way.

It was very possible she could plan for either of them to be injured just enough to prove them inept. The plan would be for one of them to end up with a minor injury but end up getting one or both of them killed in the process.

There was no doubt in Jessi's mind that Jem, as well as more than half the family, would never willingly allow Nana to do anything of the sort; the simple fact was Nana held the strings.

Jem had only just garnered enough trust in his position as Head of the family that he'd been able to fight for the girls to have been given a chance to prove themselves. It hadn't sat right with anyone that Jessi had been banned, but until now if she'd gone out in the field Ella would've eventually followed.

There was too much fear at what Ella could do to allow that. She'd been an incredibly gifted hereditary witch before Nana had bound her powers. The wounds she'd sustained from the attack that had killed Rico had left a poison in Ella, one that should've killed her. How she'd survived and how her blood had saved Sam was still a mystery. Not even Jem, who had scoured every known Guardian library and any other he thought might have answers, could explain it. All they knew is that the poison hadn't entirely been eradicated, it still lingered in Ella's blood with a darkness no one knew exactly how it could affect Ella. There was no guarantee it wouldn't eventually take control of her and the idea of a Guardian with Ella's natural talent going dark was understandably terrifying.

Jessi hadn't ever been able to swallow the idea of Ella going dark. Grandda had said it himself the day before he was killed, not even the darkness of what had attacked Ella could darken her light. If there was anyone they had to worry about it was Jessi, she'd be far more likely to go dark than Ella.

That hadn't mattered, Nana had wielded the family's fear as skillfully as she'd once handled a blade. It didn't help that she'd been a trusted elder, one that prior to the death of her husband and her son had been wise and careful in her dealings. No one had seen the other side; the cunningly ruthless woman that had let fear consume her.

Jessi feared the day that Nana's true nature would show, but there was no telling exactly how far she would go before the rest of the family saw it. Jessi couldn't even be sure that Jem saw how frighteningly desperate Nana had become. The reality was that Jem could be so easily blinded by Nana until it was too late to undo what she'd already set into motion.

A shiver went down Jessi's spine at the thought. Her face was a carefully controlled mask as she stepped back from Ella giving her a smile before turning her attention back to Dean.

"So are we going to train or are we all going to stand here with our thumbs up our ass?"

Dean watched her carefully for a moment, he knew her too well, she knew he had seen her fear, but he also knew it wasn't something he could ask about with Ella there.

"A cat fight, or two women at once? I'm game," Dean said with a shrug before a smile split his face at the matching expressions and noises of sheer disgust. His dancing eyes told Jessi it'd been a joke and a distraction for her benefit.

"You know him; does he always have to go there?" Ella asked shaking her head.

"Unfortunately yes, he thinks he does," Jessi promised with a light roll of her eyes.

"Stop yapping and get in the ring Jessi," Dean interrupted turning all business. "Ella, watch closely how she breaks fights, pay special attention to how she either evades me or slips my grip. You're going to need to match her."

Ella nodded as Jessi moved into fighting stance and watched Dean suspiciously. Ella had to admit she was going to really enjoy watching Dean get his ass handed to him.

She'd seen plenty of men try to take on her cousin. They frequently made the mistake of assuming that because she was small she didn't pack much of a punch. They were always proven wrong. Ella quickly discovered however, Dean apparently wasn't most men because he not only held his own, he proved time and time again he could take Jessi down.

As Ella watched Jessi slipped Dean's grasp and retaliated with a kick that he instantly slapped away. She tried to circle him while she maintained her distance from his much longer reach. With a flurry of punches and kicks she attacked, each one Dean either dodged or blocked. His greater strength forced her to bring her limbs back swiftly as he pushed them away. When he tried to tackle her, Jessi dodged effortlessly and elbowed him in the face. Regaining the upper hand, she swept his foot out from under him sending him crashing to the floor. He reached out as he fell taking her with him. They struggled for a few moments before Dean managed to twist around pinning Jessi under him.

"Son of a bitch," Jessi swore, in a way that told Ella it wasn't the first time. She tapped at him and he rolled off of her. "If I'd known we were going to play Dean, I wouldn't have worked out so hard at the gym."

"Excuses, excuses," Dean returned with a brief grin while Jessi got to her feet, his attention already turned to Ella. Jessi watched as Dean spoke to her cousin already moving her into a block to stop his punch.

"Hey, you two don't get to have all the fun," Jessi said breaking them up, stepping in as Dean directed Ella on how to spin around her opponent and break free.

After nearly two hours of watching and then attempting to replicate Jessi's moves Ella was dripping with sweat, out of breath, and she wasn't sure she would be able to stand for much longer.

It was grueling and frustrating, no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't manage to move like her cousin. Even more frustrating was the fact that Dean was now completely focused on fighting and she couldn't distract him enough to get the leverage she needed. She didn't feel confident enough to use the same tactics she'd used in the alley, not with Jessi there watching. Besides she had the very distinct feeling she wouldn't be the first to try and seduce Dean into detrimental distraction; he just hadn't expected it from her that first time. What had worked once she was pretty damn certain wouldn't work again.

Ella meandered down the hall to the linen closet listening to the sound of flesh meeting flesh and the grunts of training. Damn; it had been years since she'd heard those sounds and she hadn't realized how much she missed it. She hadn't realized how much she missed any of the life until she'd decided she'd made a mistake in trying to walk away from it.

Opening the door of the closet she pulled out a couple of simple white towels, the kind you could bleach the smell of sweat out of and the first aid kit. She'd split a couple of knuckles since she hadn't thought to tape her hands or wear gloves. Her hands, wrists and forearms were sore in general from the force of her fist meeting a target or blocking a punch. It had been too long since she'd trained, so long she'd forgotten how it made her blood sing, how alive it made her feel.

" _A born fighter, with the heart of a warrior and the mind of a sovereign_ , _you and Jessi will go down as two of the greats, mark my words_."

Grandda's voice echoed in her head, deep pride and warm praise could be heard, both of those directed at her. It was the first time she actually remembered those emotions attributed to her own fighting. Sure she'd heard it whispered all her life, how she'd once shown such promise; how everyone had thought she'd be a hero on par with those that still dominated mythology with their valiant deeds. However, this was the first time she remembered a close family member actually saying the words.

This time the memory didn't cause sharp blinding pains like the previous ones, instead it was a dull ache, one that she could focus beyond. Absently she rubbed at her temple while she set down the items she'd collected and picked up a towel to wipe her brow.

Taking up her water bottle she drank deeply as she watched Jessi and Dean spar, while her mind tried to sort through the day. Jessi had never given up; Ella could see it in the moves that Jessi used that she'd never seen before. Even despite her obviously continuing to train she could only get the upper hand in a fight with Dean two out of five bouts. Continuing to watch she capped the bottle. Jessi's eyes were narrowed, her complete focus was on Dean, she'd forgotten Ella was even there.

Throwing a punch Jessi wrapped him into an arm bar, using his momentum to dodge and over balance him. He landed face down on the floor as Jessi twisted his arm behind him, putting a knee in his back. When he tried to rise she pushed his arm higher up his back.

"Alright, I give," Dean grumbled before Jessi let him go, bouncing up with a grin, and holding her hand out to help him up. "I need food."

"Of course you do, you're a walking appetite," Jessi replied wryly.

"How about you put in an order for Chinese while I hit the shower," Ella suggested breaking off a bickering match she could see brewing. It struck her how she instantly stepped into the role of peacemaker between the two with little understanding as to why. She shook off the feeling that it was how it'd always been between the three of them. "Besides, you're going to have to be downstairs for shift in just a few hours, you need to clean up and get some food first."

Ella tossed a towel at her cousin. Jessi wiped at her face while she shared a grin with Dean, they were completely at ease with each other. Ella had definitely mistaken the intimacy between them. She'd clearly seen an almost sibling relationship, the same teasing, testing, and squabbling that she often engaged in herself with Jessi.

There was something else, a side of their relationship Ella had never been given the chance to have with Jessi. It was the camaraderie and trust that only came with those that had been in the field together. She highly doubted that they'd been on only a handful of hunts together. In fact, the more she watched them the more she could see they'd known each other for far longer than either had admitted.

It made perfect sense if Jessi had known Dean for longer that she'd said. Which made it possible that she'd known Dean for as far back as Jessi did. She might not have had contact with him over the years like Jessi, but it was likely that if Jessi had been friends with him for any significant length of time, Ella once had too.

Dean hadn't said a word when she'd asked him whether or not she'd known him, but his look had said it all. She now had a vague memory of a younger Dean and another boy, she'd figure to be around five years younger. It was a good guess the other boy had been his younger brother Sam. The records didn't show the Winchesters at the farm long enough to build the sort of relationship she could see between Jessi and Dean. Granted might people hit it off all the time. They might meet someone and feel as if they'd known them all their life, but that wasn't the case here, this was different. Especially since Jessi had never worked that way, she was too cautious with new people.

Ella had listened to them while they spared. She'd heard their inside jokes and shared memories; they hadn't even realized what they were giving away to anyone paying close enough attention. It'd been apparent they'd known each other a long time.

"How often and how long did you train with my grandparents?"

Ella threw the question at them unexpectedly, calculatingly, hoping to surprise an answer out of them, both turned to look at her wide eyed. Immediately Jessi's mouth opened to answer but nothing came out. Narrowing her gaze Ella could see the whites of Jessi's eyes; her cheeks were flushed and the muscles in her neck worked. It looked as if she were fighting to say something, instead she could only produce silence.

"You can't answer can you? You physically can't answer the question, either one of you."

There was a slight nearly unperceivable nod from Jessi while Dean looked on in frustration, the answer to her question burning in his eyes just as they had in the car.

"I see," was all she said, looking away from them. In some ways she could see so very well and in others she couldn't at all. The answer to this question only led to more, the most important why and how had they been silenced? There was only one explanation, nothing else made any sense.

"Were you spelled?"

Again neither could say anything, for all the training and talents Ella hadn't used since walking away from the life, reading people was one of the few she'd continued to need. It was something that came in handy to Guardian, Hunter and Innocent alike.

It didn't take an expert to see the answer, it was plain on their faces. Watching them carefully she noticed the signs of strain at trying not to remain silent. Jessi's knuckles were turning white and Ella was certain if she opened her cousin's palms she'd see where her nails had bit in. The muscles in Dean's jaw were clenching and his fists were clenched no less tightly than Jessi's.

"I've known you for longer than that summer," she said softly, her focus on Dean. It wasn't a question this time it was a statement. Dean's face went white with pain as he fought against the spell to answer her. She stared into his eyes until they seemed to take up all of her vision.

Something popped in her head, an almost audible sound like a soap bubble. She struggled to push farther, feeling like she was trying to hold water that was slipping through her hands. Pain stabbed through her temple again. Her eyes watered and an involuntary moan of pain slipped from her lips as her vision blurred. A part of her mind knew her body was falling but it couldn't respond.

 _Ella found herself in hand to hand training, she'd been paired off against Dean, Jessi against Sam. It was good for all of them. The boys were stronger; it was just how they were built. It was good to train against a stronger opponent; to learn how to be quicker, harder to pin down and faster, slipping away before the boys could get a good grip on them. Both the girls had to be able to think faster and be cleverer, it was the only thing that would save them against something with more inhuman strength than they had._

 _At the same time, it forced the boys to learn how to take on an opponent that moved like quicksilver and didn't fight fair. Dean's punches were swift and strong, whistling just past her head as she dodged. He'd given up holding back over a year before. Grandda had praised the respectability of believing it was unacceptable to hit a girl but had explained to both the boys it wasn't doing any of them any favors._

 _A real opponent wouldn't hold back against the girls, just as any female opponent would use Dean's chivalry against him. Quickly Dean and Sam had realized that both girls needed to know how to take a hit, to understand that when their strikes were blocked they needed to be faster in coming back to a defensive position. How would either of the girls hope to survive if they were sheltered from the full breadth of a man's strength?_

 _John had instructed the boys well in the basics of fighting, but the only person Dean had to spar against when they weren't at the farm was his father and brother. Neither Ella or Jessi used the same style of fighting._

 _Ella dodged again, blocking one of his punches with her forearm, she knew it would leave bruising, but she laughed. He moved grace and surety, his loose gait that of a born warrior. Immediately following his punch, he pivoted into a kick with a smoothness she found admirable. Still it didn't stop her from spinning out of the way, light as air on the balls of her feet._

" _Faster Dean." Gradda called before moving off to assess Sam and Jessi. "Sam don't let Jessi distract you."_

 _Dean growled under his breath, frustrated, grabbing for Ella, she could feel his hands on her as she just barely managed slip his grasp. When they'd first come to the farm the boys had ended their sparring sessions drenched with sweat, but now like Jessi and Ella they had barely broken one yet._

" _Ella use those dancing lessons." Nana called. "Be quick, light as air, graceful. It's another dance but this one will get you killed if you don't do it right."_

 _Ella gave only a brief nod of_ _acknowledgement_ _to her grandmother as she continued to dodge and spin. No matter how many times he tried Dean couldn't get a good grip on her_ _;_ _she kept_ _managing to_ _twist away or slip out of it._ _Though it was becoming progressively difficult, each time he touched her she felt a little spirt of warmth, a wish that his hands would linger a little longer. It was disconcerting._

" _We'll be back, keep working," Ella heard her grandfather call_ _to them. From_ _the corner of her eye she saw the adults leave._

 _That split second of a distraction was enough for Dean to get a_ _good_ _grip on her and tackle Ella. For a moment she couldn't catch her breath_ _;_ _the wind had been knocked out of her. His weight_ _was_ _solid on her as he knelt, his knees on either side of her_ _;_ _most of his weight pinning her down. Dean's hands_ _braceleted_ _her wrists near her head but far enough away she couldn't take a chunk of him by biting him. He'd learned that one the hard way._

 _Ella couldn't help the irritation at his triumph, he wouldn't let her live it down for weeks, but when her gaze clashed with his she saw_ that _look again. The one she'd seen when John had first dropped the boys off and she'd_ _wondered_ _out_ _to_ _the porch_ _,_ _curious if John had_ _indeed_ _decided to drop_ _left_ _the boys_ _in the Jameson's care_ _again. The one that she'd seen when he thought she wasn't looking_ _;_ _the one she couldn't interpret._

 _For the first time she noticed how the green in his green eyes were ringed with gold and his_ _lashes_ _were thick for a boy. He licked his lips bringing her attention to their shape and confusing her with the sudden urge to kiss_ _him._ _The lines of his face had sharpened_ _and_ _his body_ _had_ _hardened, she could see the outline of his muscles under the often washed shirt he wore._

 _He continued to look at her as she looked at him, a warmth pooling in her belly for the first time. That first fluttering of butterflies and the skipping of her heartbeat. He searched her face as if looking for something before dropping his head his lips just_ _lightly_ _touching hers._

 _The kiss was soft, gentle, with the sweet taste of innocence. He'd been wanting to do that since he'd first seen her when his father had unceremoniously dumped both him and Sammy_ _on_ _the Jameson's stoop. When for the first time he'd realized she wasn't a little girl anymore._

" _What was that for?" she whispered._

" _For you," he replied giving her a wide smile before he heard the footsteps of the adults returning._

 _Glancing up he realized neither Sam or Jessi had seen anything, which was probably for the best. The last thing he needed was either of those two teasing him mercilessly. Swiftly Dean jumped to his feet reaching a hand out to offer Ella help up._

 _When she met his eyes again his expression had gone cool, leaving her confused._ _Had she done something wrong?_ _A wash of awkward embarrassment flooded through her settling in the pit of her stomach as her heart plummeted to join it. That_ _was_ _until she felt his hand momentarily tangle with hers squeezing and letting go before_ _he gestured for her to resume her_ _fighting_ _stance_ _._

"Ella, Ella." She could hear Dean's voice, it pulled her away from the past, hurling her back to the present. When she opened her eyes for one heart stopping moment she found she couldn't see anything except a sea of white, the pressure in her head unbearable, nausea from the pain miserable. After a few minutes her vision cleared to find Dean cradling her limp body, he searched her face as if looking for something, before his gaze lingered on her lips.


	12. Chapter 12

Gently she placed her hand against his cheek and lifted her head, laying her lips against his. The kiss was soft and gentle, with a touch of shyness and the taste of innocence.

"For you," Ella whispered, stopping his heart all together for a moment.

He hadn't ever forgotten that first kiss, how could he? It'd haunted his dreams; he'd never admitted to anyone how he'd woken up in the middle of the night remembering, wanting her. He'd fought for years to lock away his feelings and convince himself they'd been nothing. Even if he'd wanted to forget it. It had happened only a few days before Rico had died, less than a week before Eleanor had taken Ella away from him completely. It was stamped thoroughly in his brain and his heart. For years it had served as a testament to the reasons it was best not to get too involved with a girl.

"What happened?" Jessi demanded, returning both of them to the here and now, worry darkening her face turning her vivid blue eyes into the purple blue of the clouds of an oncoming storm.

"Nothing," Ella replied slowly pulling herself into a seated position and batting away their hands. The memory lingered. The embarrassment and confusion of that moment echoing in the present making her irritable. "I'm fine, I'm going to take that shower."

Both Dean and Jessi watched her worriedly as she stood shakily and made her way toward the bathroom, but neither said anything or followed her. They both knew she'd try to kick their ass if they did. Granted she'd probably wind up on her own ass, which kept both of them frozen as she used the wall to steady herself and stumbled into the bathroom, slamming the door behind her.

Turning on the shower Ella leaned against the sink for a moment and stared at her own reflection until the steam rose to swirl around her, beginning to fog the mirror. Her face was deathly pale. Pain etched lines in her face; a pain that was making her unbearably nauseous.

Opening the medicine cabinet, she took out a prescription bottle, shaking out a Vicodin and reaching for a second bottle adding an anti-nausea medication, she tossed them into her mouth and dry swallowed them. It wasn't often she resorted to prescription strength painkillers but she could tell that the headache that hadn't eased wouldn't be tamed by Tylenol alone. Putting away the bottles she closed the cabinet and turned on the tap cupping the water from it in her hand and drinking it.

She closed her eyes to calm her racing heart, wishing she knew what had triggered the memory. As much pain as she was in at that moment she'd do it again in a heartbeat if she could regain more of herself; especially if she could find the truth without hurting Jessi and Dean.

Stripping off her sticky sweaty clothing, she stepped into the tub and sat in the bottom of it. She drew her knees up wrapping her arms around them as she rested her head against them letting the hot water wash over her. The heat loosened her muscles; easing the pain in her head. The added circulation from the hot water making the medicine travel faster through her blood stream.

She could almost feel the medicine moving through her, feeling as though it were warming her blood taking the edge off the pain. As she sat there in the old slipper tub with the water streaming over her; her head resting on her knees, she let her thoughts return to the memory. She held it in her mind; replaying it. Remembering and savoring everything about the moment. The smell of the rain beating on the windows of the stable that had been transformed into an indoor training arena. The feeling of the fight thrumming through her veins and the way she'd loved the mental gymnastics of keeping one step ahead of her opponent.

She wished she'd remembered more, that it hadn't been such a small sliver, whatever it was that had happened that summer had been important. Important enough that both Dean and Jessi had fought to tell her despite the pain it caused to try. Her instincts were screaming. If it hadn't been important they wouldn't have been spelled into silence; nor would they have fought despite the pain. Especially not Dean, Jessi wanted her back in her full capacity, but there was no reason for Dean to want her to remember, or at least none that she could think of.

She couldn't help beginning to wonder how far those blanks in her memory went. How many things beyond that summer Rico had died had been wiped from her memory? She knew that Dean hadn't been at the farm for just that summer. In that shiny new memory, she'd known he'd come and gone a few times.

What else couldn't she remember? What else had been taken from her? And how in the hell did she get to the bottom of it? What had happened and why was it being hidden in the first place?

A shiver slid down her spine chilling her despite the hot water all around her, but she ignored it. The truth was, it didn't matter anymore; she had to know. She wouldn't be able to leave it alone until she knew the truth, for better or worse. It would never stop haunting her and she'd already lived through years of the ghosts of her past plaguing her. She just couldn't do it anymore.

She couldn't be certain when or if any more memories would come, there was only one surefire way to gain the truth. No matter how much she hated the idea; she would have to keep pushing at Dean and Jessi. She'd have to be careful. Handling the situation with delicacy was paramount, she'd have to her questioning to keep their pain to a minimum.

She'd have to be careful in her phrasing, they hadn't been able to give her an answer for anything other than a simple yes or no, and even then she'd been forced to read their expressions. Her heart sank as she realized there was no one else in her family she could trust except Jessi. She had no idea who had been desperate enough to work the spell in the first place. She couldn't risk whoever it was having the slightest inkling that she was looking for answers. If they had any idea they'd shut her down before she ever got started and she'd never know.

Ducking her head Ella let her tears be washed away by the water sluicing over her, unable to help the ache in her heart. She'd always done everything she'd ever been told. She'd trusted explicitly in her family and done what they'd expected without question. Since birth she'd been raised to believe that there was nothing she shouldn't give for her family and she'd believed it whole heartedly; until now.

It was possible that there were very good reasons for what had been done, but her gut was telling her that there wouldn't be an explanation good enough. There was a dawning belief that what had happened to her, her cousin and Dean all those years ago was a great disservice and a grave injustice. Ella hoped desperately that she was wrong; that her instincts had jumped ahead of themselves. She was afraid that they hadn't.

She would have to dig around in Jem's library. He'd come to trust her which had made him less restrictive, by now he'd given her the magical locks to most of the wards on the books that were general off limits. Jem had many talents but working creatives and complicated warding wasn't one of them. He didn't have the talent for it. The books that were dangerous were locked by the Brightmores but there was a good chance what she needed was within the books she already had access to.

Lifting her aching head, she twisted it to the other side letting the water run over it. One way or another she was going to find the truth. She was going to figure out exactly what had happened that summer and she was going to find out why it'd been hidden from her. More importantly she was going to find out who taken it from her in the first place.

Jessi watched helplessly as Ella stumbled away, fear still had its icy grip around her heart. One moment Ella had been peppering them with questions while Jessi had been fighting to give her answers, any kind of answer, and the next Ella had gone deathly pale. Her eyes had rolled back and she'd collapsed. Jessi's head felt like a bomb waiting to explode. She swore she could see red out of the corners of her eyes.

Jessi thanked every lucky star that Dean had caught Ella before she hit the floor. It hadn't escaped her notice that he'd cradled Ella in his arms as if she were something precious and the fear in his eyes had matched her own.

After what felt like hours, but was little more than minutes Ella had opened her eyes again. Her face had still been deathly pale and her eyes had stared sightlessly before finally focusing on Dean. The pain in them tore at Jessi's heart.

She heard the shower turn on and with a growl of pure hatred she whirled on the punching bag and began to pummel it with a single mindedness that would have impressed her Uncle.

"Jessi?"

The voice barely penetrated the fog of her brain, even as a hand rested on her shoulder. She whirled, not thinking, only reacting, having every intention of destroying the person stupid enough to have touched her in that moment.

Her eyes registered Dean even as her body was already sweeping his feet out from under him. He hit the floor hard with a loud thump and a growl. Wincing she crouched down to him, her eyes brimming with unshed tears, as she held out a hand.

"I'm sorry Dean, so sorry. I wasn't even here."

He looked up at her irritation clouding his eyes as he rubbed his hip. If she hadn't felt terrible and wasn't so terrifyingly furious she would have been laughing, but right at the moment she couldn't find any humor in anything that had just happened.

"I owe you one, Jessi, just remember that." Dean grumbled even as he accepted her hand and allowed her to help him back up off the floor.

She only looked at him for a moment before she began pacing the floor like a caged animal, her shoulders held so stiffly it made Dean ache just looking at her. Her body trembled with fury, a fury she had no way to vent and he couldn't blame her. If it had been Sammy instead of Ella…

Shaking his head, he didn't even want to think of what he'd do, even with Ella he was furious. He couldn't fault her reasons for being angry but there was one very important piece Jessi seemed to be missing. One that was far more important than any anger at the past that none of them could change now.

Those two words Ella had whispered to him had hit him hard. He'd never forgotten that first kiss. He wasn't even certain it was possible to forget it. It hadn't been more than a simple meeting of lips, gentle and innocent and yet it had rocked him to his core, even then.

Even more importantly no one other than the two of them had known about it. He doubted Ella had ever even had a chance to share it with Jessi, as he knew she would've if everything hadn't gone to hell a matter of days later and she'd forgotten it. He'd always wondered why most of the memories she's lost were the ones directly associated with him.

The spell had erased anything tied to Ella's will to hunt. What he had to do with Ella's hunting outside of training he'd never understood.

After all she'd begun training before he had, if anything she should've forgotten Jessi over him. It was always the two of them that were supposed to hunt together anyway. It had haunted him for years, why had Ella forgotten him?

He pulled himself out of his bleak thoughts with effort, he hadn't found an answer then and it wasn't likely he'd find an answer now. He'd probably never know; it was best he just let it go. Instead he turned his attention back to Jessi and the matter at hand.

"You do realize you're looking at this all wrong?" Dean drawled, waiting for the words to wash over her and register as he settled himself onto the arm of the couch.

As he expected Jessi stopped dead and looked at him in bafflement. With a wry, amused smile tugging at his lips he took a deep swig from his bottle of water as he waited for her to respond. It probably wasn't a good idea to bait her, after all her fury was tangible at this point, but he couldn't help himself.

"How? What?"

Her frustration and hurt was palpable in the air around her, still controlling her.

God, women were so emotional he thought with a brief shake of his head. How was it he could see everything she'd been hoping for was falling into place and she couldn't?

"I get why you're mad, really I do, but Jessi look at the whole picture. This hair-brained scheme you concocted and begged me to help with appears to be working. Have you even realized that?"

"What makes you think that?" Jessi asked, her voice barely audible, he could see the hope battling the terror in her eyes. She was afraid to believe it; it would break her heart if it turned out he was wrong.

He felt a pang for the fact that she was so used to everything slipping through her fingers and twisting around to bite her. She didn't dare trust what was happening, that a straw she had grasped at in desperation might actually be working.

"Trust me she's remembering, only pieces at a time, but important ones. She remembered I was at the farm the morning after the attack, earlier today. She still thinks it was a hellhound that attacked her, but who knows how long that will last. It's why I ended up parking in front of Jameson's in the first place. It hurts her to remember. I had to get her inside as quickly as I could and I was too worried about her to think about where I was parking, or who might recognize my car ."

"Tell me." Jessi demanded shortly. "What triggered it?"

"I have no idea what triggered it. We were talking about Baby, I started the car while she was looking around and all of a sudden she just looked at me. I could see she recognized me. Really recognized me. She realized we'd known each other before. She doesn't remember much, but she _knew_ me. It was just a second, her eyes widened like a deer in headlights and she told me I was at the farm the day after the attack. She didn't ask me Jessi, she told me, she knew it."

"That's not enough Dean," she sighed, her shoulders sagging as if she's been given hope only to have it snatched away again. "Not nearly enough, at this rate we might get her back in a couple years, by then it'll be too late."

"There's more," Dean told her, he bit his lip and looked down for a moment before he continued. Jessi studied him, it was as if he didn't want to tell her but felt he had to. It was as if by telling her he'd have to admit to something even if only to himself, something he didn't want to.

"What else did she remember Dean?"

"Just now when she passed out, the first words out of her mouth when she woke were 'For you'."

"You're going to have to explain a little more," Jessi prodded as Dean paused again. "I heard her, but it means nothing to me, apparently it does to you."

"I told her that the first time I kissed her, it wasn't anything anyone other than Ella or I would know," Dean admitted.

"When in the hell did that happen?"

"When we were training a few days before Rico died. We were sparring, you were paired off with Sammy, and Ella with me. I took her down and pinned her, your grandparents had stepped out of the room for a moment and you were too distracted trying to keep ahead of Sammy."

"I remember that day," Jessi said quickly as she turned the memory over in her mind. "I barely saw you take her down, but I remember thinking it was taking you too long to win the bought. You had taken me down quicker a couple of times both that day and in the days before."

"She was slippery," Dean replied in a guileless manner that Jessi saw right through.

"Bullshit, how long had you been planning it?" she asked, her eyes narrowing as she raised an eyebrow and crossed her arms.

"A couple weeks," he admitted, knowing it would be pointless at this juncture to deny it, Jessi knew him too well.

She just shook her head and gave him a brief smile, while her thoughts tumbled together. Combined with the memory she'd seen from Rico's attack it was interesting. More and more she was realizing exactly how much deeper the feelings between her cousin and Dean ran.

"So she's breaking the spell herself." Jessi said turning the subject back to the present. There was a gleam, that spark made Dean slightly uncomfortable. Jessi could be so completely unpredictable and he hated it when she was two steps ahead of him. It made it harder to catch her if she veered off dangerously.

"I think so," he agreed cautiously. "But it seemed like when she remembered it was rushing her, all the memories crowding in at once and she can only grasp at small pieces, just a few moments at a time."

"Those moments will add up."

"True, but you said it yourself how long will it take Jessi? How long do we have?"

"I'm afraid not long enough. This is deeper than you have any idea," Jessi sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose for a moment trying to hold off a headache that played at the edges of her mind.

When she turned her gaze back to Dean it was direct. He felt a shiver of apprehension slide through him, whatever she was about to tell him, he wasn't going to like. "Nana had traces of hereditary magic in her, but no more than that. Hereditary magic…"

"Are those believed to be born from the Fae rather than making pacts with a demon for powers," Dean cut her off attempting to follow the path she was leading him down. "They're naturally born with power. Ella gave me the run down earlier."

"Okay, so you know that in order to work the spell Nana had to come up with the talent to perform it somewhere…" this time Jessi trailed off.

It was difficult for her to even admit out loud exactly how far off the reservation Nana had gone. The betrayal, the treachery had gone beyond anything Jessi would have ever imagined. She hadn't wanted to believe it when she'd come across the box Nana had put together the night of Grandda's death, but she hadn't been able to deny it. It'd held all the ingredient to summon a crossroads demon. From the moment the spell had taken effect Jessi had known how far Nana had gone to gain those powers and she hadn't had any way to prove it. It would've been her word against Nana's, a trauma stricken fourteen-year-old versus a respected elder. Not even Jem knew the full breadth, he'd always assumed that Nana had brought in a witch to do the spell, but Jessi knew better.

Dean just stared at her for a moment the impact of what she was saying taking a moment to fully sink in.

"She made a pact," Dean spat, finishing her sentence. Jessi watched as his face darkened and his eyes flash. "Is she insane?"

"Probably," Jessi replied, a tremor in her voice as she admitted it out loud for the first time in her life. She turned her back on him unable to continue and look at him.

This was her family and her blood. It wouldn't be a stretch for him to think she was just as insane as her grandmother. The Lord knew Jessi could be just as impulsive and just as irrational as Nana had proved to be, in some ways she was more so if she was honest with herself.

"Nana might be incredibly smart and cunning, but she only had so much time to work the spell before the Conclave convened. She had to erase Ella's memory and bind our tongues before anyone realized what she'd done. In order to do that in the very limited time she had, she turned to Jem."

"Jem helped her do this?"

Jessi closed her eyes at the fury that deepened his voice. She couldn't blame him, but Jem had done the best he could at the time.

Turning back to Dean she met his eyes without flinching from his anger, no matter how much she wanted to. She refrained from reacting at all

Jessi had time to come to terms with the realities of what had been done to all of them years ago. While she was no less disgusted at Nana's actions at this point, the shock had died out. Now it just sat like a lead ball in her stomach.

However, Jem had done and always would do what was best for the family. He'd done his best to protect both the girls, but there'd only been so much he could do. He hadn't had the power or the influence he did now.

"It wasn't as if Jem had a choice. Grandda had been the Head of the family, but when he died the Elders took control until a new Head was named. Nana had and has considerable influence over the Elders and the family, hell what she says now goes. Jem knew that if he didn't help her she would've gone elsewhere, she'd made up her mind and there was no turning her back. He was gone the day she worked the spell, he always thought she brought in someone, someone that would do the spell and leave never to ask questions or come back. It's what she told him she was going to do. He chose to find the spell, chose to help her, so he could put a back door into the spell, a very small one, but it was enough to give Ella a chance that she wouldn't have had otherwise."

"What back door?" Dean's voice was incredibly and dangerously low. His eyes burned fury, a fury she'd knew well.

"He made sure the spell wouldn't make her forget if she began to remember on her own." Jessi told him rubbing her hands over her face and trying to find the right words to explain. Jem had exhausted the breadth of his own considerable knowledge to find a way to build in a loophole to the spell.

"If Ella gets any memories back she keeps them, they won't slip away again and again. He also made sure that the spell that keeps us silent doesn't mask our expressions, if Ella comes to her own conclusions she can read the answers in our eyes and on our face."

"Which is why you were so intent on me coming and trying to jog her memory, because if she remembers anything she won't forget it again. Why me?"

"That's very simple Dean, because of how you felt for her when you were sixteen and how she felt for you."

"I don't know what you're talking about," Dean said flatly

"Please Dean, don't bother," Jessi retorted. "You can try to deny how you felt about her then or how you still feel, but we'd both know it's a lie."

"Don't be ridiculous Jessi. It would be stupid for me to get caught up with a girl. I can't have attachments like that, it's too dangerous. You know that just as well as I do."

"Says who, your father?" Jessi asked, moving closer, her eyes boring into him. "Come on Dean, look who you're talking to? We both know you can't stay away from her now any more now than you could then. Besides would it really be so bad?"

"Coming from the girl that was warning me away last night?" He snapped, his agitation rising. "You just want me to bring back her memory Jessi."

"It's more than that. I can access her dreams for the first time since everything happened when we were kids. I saw what she saw in that bathroom, I felt what she felt. She loved you and I'm pretty sure you loved her back."

"Stop it Jessi, you're reading too far into this. I protected her the same as I would've any partner or civilian on any other hunt. I'm not going to deny she's attractive now or that she was then. I wasn't the only guy that noticed, both of us know that. It wasn't anything more than teenage hormones and attraction."

being a Guardian, all of us have powers. It comes from the angel blood running through our veins. I may have just been coming into my powers when Rico died, but I knew then as I know now you're fooling yourself if you think you didn't love her then or that your feelings don't run far deeper than you want to admit."

He turned abruptly and she knew he was going to leave. She'd said too much, as usual. She knew that she'd pushed him too hard too quickly. She didn't have time to ease him into this though, she needed him desperately.

If Ella was remembering she was going to need protection until she got all of her memories back. Protection Jessi couldn't necessarily provide while she was out in the field and she wasn't going to have a choice but to go into the field. They had already set it all into motion and there was no backtracking now. It was far too late for that and Ella wasn't about to back down now.

He wasn't willing to admit to her, let alone to himself, what his feelings were. They bubbled just under the surface like a volcano waiting to explode. She could feel the fear for Ella, and the affection that ran deeper than he wanted to believe.

If there was one thing she knew, it was that Dean Winchester would go to great lengths to protect those he loved. He had absolute loyalty, there was nothing he wouldn't do to save his father, his brother, or even her. He'd lay down his life without question. For Ella, Jessi had the distinct feeling he'd give his soul, that is if he didn't run away from his emotions first.

She couldn't trust her family, as much as that hurt her to admit. Even Jem couldn't guarantee her cousin's protection, though she knew he would do everything he could. The family had failed miserably already and there was no one else she could turn to. There was no one she could trust to give everything to see Ella safe, Jessi couldn't afford to let him walk out the door too simply because he was afraid of his own feelings.

"Stop Dean, please," she said, her voice begging as he reached the door. Never in all of his years of knowing Jessi had he ever heard her beg, but for Ella she'd get on her knees and grovel if she had to.

His hand reached for the door knob and turned it. Jessi had the distinct feeling that if he walked out that door it would be forever. He'd run from his feelings rather than admit them because like her he was afraid of what could happen to someone he loved.

The idea that it was better to be alone than to risk someone else's life was deeply entrenched in both of them, even though deep down more than anything else Dean had always wanted a home. It was a wish that he'd long ago convinced himself that he couldn't have.

Ella's memories, the echoes of the emotions of the past, Dean's desperate need to make sure Ella was safe, told Jessi there was a chance that they could both make that wish a reality. Both of them were teetering on the edge, whether either took that step she couldn't say, but unlike Jessi, Dean had a chance. If only he didn't blow it due to his own bull headed stupidity. Jessi would kill to have a chance and what she could so clearly see Dean and Ella still had a chance at. Something as real and lasting like her parents had, something they'd started seven years ago before it'd been brutally ripped away. For some they found that perfect partner young, her parents had and she knew to her very bones so had Ella and Dean, the seeds were there they just needed to let them grow. It was such a pain in the ass to see what others couldn't get out of their own way to see. What was the good of her damn power if she couldn't help the two people she cared for and respected the most?


	13. Chapter 13

She could see so much of her own mother in Ella, the need to create a home and the fierceness to protect it. Dean had the possibility of loving someone that he wouldn't have to hide who and what he was. Ella respected it and would do everything in her power to help him, to support him. Ella wouldn't ever think of asking him to give it up, she wouldn't pretend that monsters didn't exist, in fact she probably knew more about the creatures Dean would hunt than he did.

It would take some more training, but it was entirely possible that she'd be able to defend herself if necessary. Soon he wouldn't have to worry about something attacking Ella while he was on a hunt, she'd be able to take care of herself. Even more she could teach him what he hadn't had the time to learn and find out the information he needed on the unusual cases he didn't already know how to take care of.

At the same time, if Ella never got her memories back, it was possible Jessi would still have a partner. If there was anyone else she could work with it would be Dean. They'd already proved they could work together and Ella could still run the hunt from a home base.

Maybe Jessi was getting her hopes up, maybe things wouldn't work out like she thought, but there was a chance. A chance Jessi would never have; even a Guardian or Hunter wouldn't understand her dedication to the field. They'd try to change her, expect her to stay at home and that was something Jessi just couldn't do.

She was too much like her aunt Delphine and she'd seen what that kind of dedication to the field had done to Ella. She knew what it felt like to have to grow up without her parents. She couldn't do that, more importantly she didn't really want it.

"Can you walk out that door and live with yourself if Ella was hurt or died because you were afraid of what you might feel?" she asked quickly as the door opened, he hesitated, though he didn't turn around.

Jessi took a deep breath feeling like she was walking a high tight rope with no safety net. She didn't have Ella's way with words and explaining things in a manner that had them not only understanding her side, but agreeing with her.

"I'm sorry Dean. I got ahead of myself, you know how easily it is for me to do." Jessi told him quietly. "All I meant was you had feelings for her, strong enough feelings you risked your life to protect her from what killed Rico. No one except me knows what it did to you to have Nana wipe Ella's memories and forget you. For God's sake Dean, you left Sammy to protect her, and I know you've paid for it dearly every day since. I know I have no right to ask anything of you, if I hadn't let my fear consume me Sam would've been in the safe room. He would've never been in the hall with me, he wouldn't have tried to protect me and he wouldn't have been scratched…"

"But?" Dean prompted as she trailed off, turning enough to look at her, unable to ignore the sincerity he heard in her voice.

"But there's no one to protect Ella except me, no one that wants to give back what was taken from her like me, except maybe you. I can't do this alone Dean. I'm petrified if I don't have help this time she might not survive what comes."

Dean looked at Jessi as she paused, there were tears shining in her eyes, and as she held her hand out in a staying motion it trembled.

"I didn't want to admit it last night, but I need you Dean. If nothing else I need you to protect her, I need you because you can see the dangers she wants to hide from me. Things I can't or won't see."

"I'm not your guy Jessi. I'm not the man that can settle down and live an apple pie life. I don't want it."

"Who's asking you to?" she demanded, hoping eventually he'd see his words for the lie they were, a lie he'd told himself over and over until he'd actually believed it. "All I'm asking is that you help me protect her. Help me be sure she can survive this road we're traveling down. Help me make her whole again."

"I can't stick around here forever, Jessi, I won't." she could hear the wavering in his voice. She could hear his uncertainty.

"I'm not asking you to. I'm asking you to stay for now," Jessi told him carefully, allowing the pleading tone to stay in her voice. When he continued to stand there she continued on.

"They're giving us a test hunt to see if I can handle the field and Ella can run a hunt from here. It's going to happen any day now, I can feel it bearing down on us and Nana will do anything to ensure we fail. I'm afraid to leave Ella, I'm afraid that she'll get hurt without me here because Nana will do something stupid. She's already sold her soul Dean. What else does she have to lose? What else is she capable of?"

"Son of a bitch," Dean growled enunciating each word in his helpless anger as he slammed the door. More than anything he wanted to punch the door but he couldn't risk bringing Ella running. The last thing he wanted was to try and explain the hole he'd more than likely put in the door. His bloody knuckles would be the obvious answer no matter what excuse he came up with.

"There's a term for what you're doing Jessi, it's called emotional blackmail."

"I'm sorry Dean, but I don't have any other choice."

She was winning, she could hear it in his voice. A smirk hovered in the corners of her mouth as he sighed. Quickly she hid it, even she had enough self-preservation to know better than to let him see it.

"So what's the next move then Jessi?"

"I have to go to Jem. I'll explain you've stepped in to act as body guard for Ella while I'm gone and hopefully he helps me keep your presence here quiet."

"Is that really smart Jessi considering everything? Can he really be trusted? What's going to happen if the rest of the family figures it out?"

"It's not the rest of the family we have to worry about Dean. It's Nana, for all the reasons I don't want to leave Ella alone, Nana's a danger to herself and others."

"What makes you so sure that Jem won't tell her I'm here. What makes you so sure that this whole thing won't backfire in all our faces and just end up making everything worse."

"I can't be sure." Jessi said finally relaxing some, at least enough to resume pacing. Dean leaned against the couch and raised an eyebrow at her.

"Comforting."

"Look we will never be able to pull off any of this if I don't talk to Jem. Hiding it will backfire, we're too much in his back pocket here. Being straight with him is the only chance we have at success, otherwise we fail before we even begin."

"Alright, I get it. What are you going to tell him, Jessi?"

"As little as possible to get him on board." Jessi said with a sideways glance, already having moved on to the conversation she needed to have with Jem in her head. Dean sighed and settled into the couch realizing he'd lost her. "And Dean don't shut yourself off."

He couldn't say he liked the fact that Jessi could read him so well, manipulate him so easily. Although, was it really manipulation when he probably wouldn't have made it past the parking lot either way?

Like it or not Jessi was right. He did care about Ella. He wasn't sure he wanted to look too deep at how much, but he wouldn't walk away and leave her vulnerable.

"I'm going to go change and talk to Jem before my shift. He should be here and now would be the best time."

"What am I supposed to tell Ella?" He asked irritably, his stomach growling as he just realized no food had been ordered.

"Tell her Jem called me in early, it happens often enough that it won't be a red flag." She threw over her shoulder as she disappeared down the hall to change for work.

Jessi flew through getting ready for work while listening to the water continue to run in the bathroom. Ella had to be in bad shape or she'd be out of the bathroom by now. She would have to get Ella into bed before she left.

"Ella?" Jessi called softly as she opened the bathroom door, Ella fought to raise her head from her knees, but she was exhausted. She felt hollowed out. She was just too tired, her mind was simply chasing itself in circles, she wasn't going to be able to figure anything out right now. Ella tilted her head up as Jessi pulled back the shower curtain. Worry darkened Jessi's eyes and creased her forehead. Ella's eyes were heavy and glassy and she looked exhausted. She was ready to fall asleep in the shower but at least the pain appeared to have eased.

"Vicodin?" Jessi asked waiting as Ella nodded. "I figured you'd need something; you weren't looking good. How about we get you dried off?"

Ella could only nod as she gathered the last of her strength while Jessi turned off the water. She might've been embarrassed if she'd had anything left in her as Jessi braced her arm and helped her stand.

She felt like a small child as Jessi handed her the towel eventually needing to help her dry off as Ella could barely hold onto the towel let alone use it. Woodenly Ella wrapped the towel around herself and let her cousin help her from the tub. More than anything Ella just wanted to lay down, more than even want, she needed it, but she wasn't certain her legs could carry her that far. Her bedroom seemed like miles away rather than mere feet.

"Dean, a little help," Jessi called out impatiently. Within moments the door opened and Dean stepped inside.

"Is she alright?" Ella heard him ask, unable to actually focus on either Jessi or Dean. Vaguely she knew she should be, hell she would be furious to have them talking as if she weren't even there, but she just couldn't find it in herself to care.

Nor did she care that Dean was standing there looking at her while she wore nothing more than a towel. Typically, the intimacy of Dean seeing her as she was would've bothered her and yet at that moment she wasn't sure she would've cared even if she'd been completely naked.

"I think she just needs to lay down," Jessi replied as she fought to keep Ella upright, her cousin was weak, troublingly so. Jessi was holding her up more than Ella was standing. "The workout, the memory hammering her and the meds she needed for the pain are making her system shut down. She needs some sleep."

Dean assessed Ella carefully, even he could see the effects of a prescription strength pain medication. She was dead pale. Even her lips were pale, almost gray. There was no way Ella was going to be able to walk even the short way down the hallway to the two bedrooms he'd glimpsed from the hallway.

Taking control, he stepped forward lifting her easily into his arms. Ella settled into him naturally. Her head curled into his shoulder resting there as if it belonged. The smell of her shampoo and soap filled his nose, the same spicy rose scent he'd smelled the night before. Her long hair trailed over his arm dripping on the wooden floors as he carried her down the hallway.

Jessi watched them from the doorway of the bathroom for a moment, a small smile curving her lips even as temper and concern chased circles in her head. What she wouldn't give to strangle Nana, but whether he wanted to admit it or not Dean cared, he cared far more than he was willing to admit. Even if she wasn't an empath she would've been able to see it in the way he held Ella, so gently, almost tenderly. Moving lightly, she followed them down the hall silently directing Dean to Ella's room.

Carefully Dean laid Ella on her bed, she looked up at him so tired, so sad, he couldn't help brushing back the hair that stuck in wet strands to her face. His hand cupping her face for just a moment, his gaze was soft as he studied her. Gently he caressed her cheek before Jessi pushed him firmly toward the door.

Dean paused in the doorway biting at his thumb absently, his eyes betraying his concern before he slipped out of the room telling himself Jessi could handle it.

Jessi wasn't certain how she did it, but she managed to get Ella into her pajamas before her cousin passed out completely. Pulling the blankets up she covered Ella and left her sleeping peacefully. The early evening sun slipping through the windows. She found Dean sitting on the edge of her couch his hands clasped loosely and his elbows resting on his knees.

"She looked rough." he said simply.

"I think we're all going to look rough before this is over," Jessi sighed shoving her hair back out of her face. "Can you keep an eye on her Dean? I don't think it's a good idea to leave her alone right now."

"Probably not," Dean agreed. "You're still going?"

"Yes, I've got to go talk with Jem before he comes to his own conclusions. We have a much better chance of getting his help if I go to him than if I wait and he ends up coming to us. There's nothing in this town Jem doesn't know Dean, and I would be shocked if he didn't already somehow know you're here. I need to have the upper hand here, or as much of one as I can get by making the first move. There's food in the fridge or you can order in. She might sleep through the night but more likely she'll wake up in a few hours. Make sure she gets something to eat if she wakes up before I get off shift."

"I'll be here."

"Hey Dean," she said pausing at the door and glancing back, the gratitude plain on her face before she even spoke, "Thanks."

"Don't mention it," he replied. Her dimples flashed reminding him of her antics as a teenager as she grinned at him before she shut the door softly behind her.

As Jessi headed down the hallway relief washed through her. For the first time in a very long time she was able to leave without having to worry about Ella.

The window at the end of the hallway shone with the last rays of light as the sun sank down behind the horizon. As she rounded the corner she saw the sunlight shining through the open door of Jem's office. She wasn't certain whether to be glad that Jem was in or not. Everything she'd told Dean was the truth, but she couldn't help the apprehension that surged through her system at what she was about to tell him.

Stepping into the doorway she found her uncle, paperwork spread over his desk a pen in his hand.

"Are you going to come in or just lurk in the doorway?" he asked without looking up. "What do you want Jessi?"

"What makes you think I want anything?" Jessi demanded, unable to help herself. She really needed to learn how to bite her damn tongue.

"Because there's a '67 black Chevy Impala parked behind Jack's Bar and Grill and Mack told me you have a new male friend that matches Dean Winchester's description," Jem replied, setting down his pen and taking off his glasses. "Ernie thinks this one has a shot of staying, but I think he might be overly optimistic."

"Damn it," Jessi muttered plopping down in one of the chairs in front of his desk. "I don't even know where to start…"

"How about you start with the real reason Dean is here and what kind of halfcocked stupid scheme you've got going now?"

"What makes you think it's either halfcocked or stupid?" Jessi snapped wishing futily for Ella's ability to explain things so calmly, so rationally.

"Unless you're a shapeshifter that just looks like my niece, then I think we both know the answer to that question."

"I don't want to fight with you Uncle Jem." Jessi took a deep breath fighting to rein in her temper, it wouldn't do any good. If she didn't sound at least half way reasonable then she was done before she even got started. "I know you're angry but will you just hear me out, all the way, before you make any demands?"

"I'm listening."

"Ella's been having dreams, not just any dreams, but _the_ dream at least six times this week alone."

"Is she remembering?" Jem demanded his eyes narrowing and his gaze sharpening. Jessi filed away his reaction to consider later.

"Yes, and no," Jessi replied. "There's been a twist to the dreams, she was calling out for Dean the other morning, so I called him. I guess I was hoping he might be able to help; that he might be able to help her remember."

"And that right there is the halfcocked stupid idea, what happens when your grandmother comes to town. She's due any day for the test hunt you begged me for…"

"I know Uncle Jem, I know, but you have to hear me out," she pleaded, hating it just as much the second time around as she had the first.

She really needed to stop putting herself in situations where she needed to beg anyone for anything, it wasn't her forte.

Jem's mouth closed with an audible snap and his jaw clenched before he waved his hand in a motion for her to continue.

"The stupid scheme, it's actually working. Since Dean's been here she's beginning to remember things, she's even asked him to train her."

"What exactly do you mean she's beginning to remember?"

"I asked Dean to come out, thinking it would only be a quick meeting, just to see if he could jog anything loose from the dreams Ella's been having. It didn't work at all that first night but he found out about Ella's plan, well really our plan." Jessi amended with some heat at having been left in the dark still, "He found out about Ella wanting to become a Historian. He was the one that pointed out the flaws in that plan and he didn't want to leave until he knew Ella was safe."

"Since when does Dean Winchester get to have any say about our family?" Jem growled, his eyes firing up.

"Since this family has done a piss poor job of taking care of Ella in the first place." Jessi fired back, trying desperately not to lose the tenuous grip she had on her own temper, "You of all people know I'm right and so is he. It's beside the point Jem, what's happening with Ella is what's really important."

Taking a deep breath and a leap of faith she took him through everything she knew, everything Dean had told her, every sign that they had Ella was breaking the spell. Jessi hadn't intended on giving him all of it, but her instincts were screaming at her that holding anything back would be a mistake.

Jessi prayed that her trust wasn't misplaced and her instincts were true, while her uncle peppered her with questions, pulling every detail she hadn't even thought to include into what she was telling him. When she finished he leaned forward his eyes gleaming dangerously. It was a look Jessi hadn't ever seen before. There was something that he wasn't telling her.

"You may be right Jessi, it's possible she's remembering and what she isn't remembering, she's figuring out." Jem mumbled, half to himself.

"Either way, I'm worried about the hunt, I'm worried about leaving her," Jessi persisted. "I think Dean can protect her while I'm gone, I think he's the perfect candidate for keeping Ella safe. Honestly I think he'd lay his life down for hers without a blink of an eye."

"I think you could be on to something here," Jem agreed, he glanced at his watch. "It's time for your shift Jessi, get downstairs. I need to think this through. We'll talk in the morning."

Jessi left Jem in his office feeling like a huge weight had been lifted. She wondered what it was he was keeping from them, but knew that now was not the time to push on that. She'd poke at him once they got through this first hunt, once they'd proven they could handle themselves.

The whole conversation had gone far better than she had anticipated, really. Jem was starting to trust her and her crazy ideas. For a moment she worried that maybe it had gone too well while her gut told her she'd done the right thing. Jem would come through for them. Either way she'd tossed the dice, and she'd just have to see where they fell.

Dean sat there for a moment wondering what in the hell he was going to do with himself. His stomach growled reminding him he'd been starving before the drama had unfolded. He stood and made his way into the kitchen. The table was overflowing with books making him think of Bobby's house; though there were no piles of dishes in the sink

Opening the fridge, he rummaged around until he pulled out the makings for a sandwich. Slapping it together he snagged a bottle of beer and made his way back to the living room where he sat on the couch. He found, surprisingly, it was as comfortable as it had looked. Picking up the remote he flicked on the TV and sat back to channel surf while he ate.

The sound of the TV was the first thing Ella heard when she woke. The dregs of the medicine had left her groggy but she forced herself to sit up. She winced at the pull of the muscles that were sore from her earlier workout. Still it was a good sore. The kind that told her she'd accomplished something. After a moment she stood, giving the mild dizziness a chance to fade. Slowly she padded through the darkness toward the living room. Guiltily she wondered if Jessi had taken the night off. If she had it would've left the bar shorthanded as the other two bartenders that worked nights were out of town.

To her surprise she found Dean, a plate on the coffee table holding little more than crumbs. She winced at the sight of the beer without a coaster under it, but she couldn't very well scold him for it given the circumstances. His gaze had shifted from the TV the moment she'd begun to walk down the hall.

"Feeling better?" he asked, even as he studied her. She was still a little pale but the pain had eased from her face as had the glassy exhaustion. He glanced down at his watch. Jessi wouldn't be off her shift for about three hours.

"Yes," she replied, unable to look him in the eye. The memory was still fresh in her mind and she was no less confused now than she'd been at fourteen. She wasn't certain what to think or even what to hope for.

Combined with the fact that he had to carry her to her bedroom wearing only a towel, she wasn't certain which embarrassed her more. Her reaction and comment to him when she'd come out of the memory, the fact that he'd had to carry her to bed like a weak child or that she'd practically been naked.

She might have been covered from chest to knee, but there was something too intimate in the fact that one wrong move or even a simple flick of his wrist and she would've been stripped bare. The thought alone sent heat coursing through her body.

"Jessi said you should eat when you got up, you hungry?"

"I can get something," she shrugged as she answered shoving down her self-consciousness, forcing her voice to sound nonchalant. "I assume you got something?"

"I made a sandwich, Jessi told me to help myself."

"Was that enough or would you like something else?" Ella asked as she walked into the kitchen, she still felt groggy and a little listless.

Dean leaned in the doorway watching as she opened the fridge and just stared inside blankly, he wasn't too sure she could make anything.

"I could really go for a bacon burger." Dean replied, she looked back at him shutting the fridge. "You said there was a diner near here? Do you feel well enough to go out? Or is there some place I could order from?"

"We could go to the diner, just let me go throw something on."

Dean watched her as she abruptly turned and stumbled back down the hallway. He hoped Jessi didn't kill him for taking her out, but he really needed out of this apartment for a few. He wondered if he should follow her to make sure she actually remembered to get dressed or the order in which clothing was supposed to be worn.

Thinking better of it he hung back, deciding to give her a few minutes before trying to help, reminding himself she'd barely come to the realization that she hadn't just met him. She sure as hell didn't know that they'd once had a closeness that came along with their training. It would be understandable if she didn't take too well if he invaded her bedroom. He meandered back into the living room to wait on the couch.

He was just about to go in after her when she appeared abruptly in the threshold of the hall, wearing a plain fitted black t-shirt and a pair of jeans that were obviously well loved. One of the knees had been blown out of them and the hems were ragged. Despite the fact she wore a pair of socks, but no shoes, everything appeared to have been put on in the correct order.

Dean cocked his head curiously at the black leather belt and the sheathed long blade knife in her hand.

"What's that?"

"A knife," Ella replied, sliding the sheath onto the belt and slipping the belt through the loops on her jeans.

"I know it's a knife smart ass, do you think you'll need it?"

"I don't know, do you suppose you'll need any of your weapons?" she asked in return, an eyebrow raised at him sarcastically. He let it go, they both knew the answer to her question.

"Are you planning on wearing shoes?"

She just gave him a baleful look before she bent over a large basket sitting on the floor next to the coat rack.

"How the hell does she manage to only put one shoe in the basket?" Ella muttered as she rooted through what was apparently a myriad of shoes in the basket.

Dean watched in amusement as Ella managed to come up with either just the left or just the right over and over again until she eventually found a complete pair of sneakers.

He didn't need to ask who Ella had been talking about. He was just grateful he'd never been forced to share a room with Jessi. He was certain the muttering he heard coming from Ella included calling Jessi things that he was probably better off not hearing. It would just give him fuel for teasing her later.

Dean was no stranger to getting in late, tossing a duffle on the floor and passing out for a few hours before the next hunt, but Jessi usually managed to explode the duffle in a matter of minutes.

How she found anything was a mystery to him, but somehow she always managed to get to what she needed despite the mayhem she created. Jessi called it organized chaos, he called it insanity


	14. Chapter 14

Ella handed him his jacket, quickly he shrugged it on before taking hers from her and holding it out. He gave her a charming grin, knowing he was getting brownie points for holding her coat. It wasn't his only reason, but it was a bonus. Her hands were shaking and he wasn't certain she'd get the coat on by herself. Further delays like the basket of shoes may very well cause his stomach to eat itself and he would be useless to her if he was dead from starvation.

"Ella, are you sure you're feeling up to going out?"

"I'll be fine." She told him, stepping by him to head into the kitchen. She came back out with a can of Coke and cracked it open as she snagged her purse. "My blood sugar's a little low. I just need some food especially after the medicine."

She took a deep swig of the sugary drink as he held the door open and led the way down the hallway to the back stairs. When they hit the bottom of the stairs there was a brief interlude of quiet until she proceeded through the double doors that led to the kitchen.

Despite her bleariness she still managed to weave her way through the bustling chaos easier than he probably ever could. She waved the greetings from the staff off with brief smiles but didn't slow in the slightest. Finally they made it outside to the cold, the street lights glowing from either end of the alley.

"Do you want to walk or should we get your car?" she asked him closing her eyes and taking a deep breath of the cold air.

"Can you walk?" He couldn't help asking, he was betting she'd spent so much time in Jameson's she could've navigated that kitchen in her sleep.

"Dean, I'm fine," she replied a little shortly, looking up at him earnestly. "I mean it, if you want to walk the cold air will do me good, if you want to drive we can do that."

Dean studied her, she was pale, but some of the color was coming back into her face. The glassiness of her eyes appeared to be fading. She seemed clearer, more alert and her wit certainly hadn't deserted her.

She hadn't bothered with make-up or to do more than run a brush through her hair and yet she was beautiful. It wasn't the sultry beauty he had a tendency to lean toward, but a completely natural one. He might've called it classic, if there hadn't been an etherealness to her.

The light played over her green eyes making them more vivid in the darkness, it highlighted her delicate features. The paleness of her skin and her hair that glowed with a copper fire made her look almost otherworldly.

Regardless of the fact that she wore only jeans, a black t-shirt and the black leather coat that was nipped in at the waist flaring at her hips, there was a mystical quality like she was a modern fairy that might disappear if he blinked, or a sorceress weaving a spell.

The clothes, though simple, accented her curvy figure. His hand itched to reach out and touch her to ensure himself she was real. Somehow he refrained.

He shook his head, running a hand over the back of his neck wondering where in the hell the fanciful thoughts had come from. He wasn't exactly a whimsical guy, that was more his geek brother's territory.

Dean could see Ella's annoyance and impatience with him, when she started to turn on her heel, he couldn't stop himself from grabbing her hand and threading his fingers through hers. As she turned toward him in surprise his other hand gently cupped her cheek.

He searched her eyes for a moment before he lowered his head and kissed her. It was probably a bad idea. There was a good chance it would just complicate things further but he couldn't stop himself, didn't want to stop himself. He needed to feel her warmth and assure himself she was alive in his arms.

The past and the present had collided when Ella had fallen earlier. One moment she'd been demanding answers, justifiably angry and then she'd gone dead white, her eyes had rolled back into her head and she'd fallen. The moment she'd paled he'd been moving toward her but still he'd barely caught her.

Jessi had been only one step behind him, watching worriedly. She may have noticed how ashen Ella had turned but Jessi hadn't noticed how shallow her cousin's breathing had become. She hadn't felt for a pulse to find it weak and thready. Dean's heart had nearly stopped and he'd been just as helpless as he had been seven years ago when she'd been injured.

Just like then there was little he could do, he'd been just about to tell Jessi to call an ambulance when Ella had opened her eyes. She'd stared sightlessly, blinded from a pain she hadn't been able to process at first

Finally, after moments that felt like hours Ella had looked at him, really looked at him. When she'd whispered those two simple but powerful words, _"For you" his_ heart had skipped a couple beats.

He felt an unexpected surge of tenderness as he continued to kiss her now, while the memory of their first kiss flashed through his mind. Those words had been a momentary flash of romantic charm, Ella had a tendency to leave him a little tongue tied. It wasn't something he was used to, with anyone else he would've made his move weeks before, leaving the girl with a smug smile and calling her darlin'. The endearment would've tumbled from his lips as easily as breathing and just as much a reflex, with little actual emotion.

They never stayed in one place long enough for him to form any attachments and the secret they were forced to keep only made that more difficult. Until his father had met the Jameson's there hadn't been anyone near his age that knew the truth.

At first he'd been furious at John for leaving them at the farm, he'd wanted to be on the road watching his father's back but once his father got an idea in his head there was no changing it. He could be a stubborn bastard.

He'd thought the boys would benefit from the training and it was a safe place John could leave his sons. Dean had taken his frustration out on both the girls, a frustration that had only deepened when they'd beaten him in training.

Both girls had moved through the obstacle course with surety and agility, they'd danced around him during sparing and damn it if Ella hadn't known the answers to nearly every question during their lessons. He'd momentarily bonded with Jessi over their mutual disgust at Ella's teacher's pet status. That had promptly disappeared the moment Jessi had knocked him on his ass a little too smugly.

He'd hated to admit that John had been right in leaving them at the farm, for the three summers when they were at the farm they'd had as close to a normal life as any Hunter or Guardian got. Sammy had loved the stability. He hadn't ever embraced the gypsy's life the way Dean had.

Dean also had to admit that had he never met Ella or Jessi he wouldn't be the hunter he was. The girls had been younger and well, girls. They'd kicked his butt for the first year but it had lit a fire in him to become better, stronger, faster and smarter. It forced him to work harder to get to their level so he could push beyond it.

Ella had been the first to show him loyalty beyond his family, despite the fact he'd treated her like the annoying sister he'd never wanted. She'd defended him with the locals. She verbally eviscerated anyone that dared to say anything against either of the Winchesters.

It hadn't been out of pity or compassion. Instead it had been because she'd cared and he'd done nothing to deserve it. If anything he wouldn't have been surprised if she'd joined in with the way he'd treated her, but he'd learned over the rest of that summer that it just wasn't in Ella. It had opened the door to him looking at her in another light, though at the time the two years between them had felt more like two decades. She was still just a baby really, however, she wouldn't always be. Some part of him must have known it.

The moment he'd seen her that final summer he hadn't seen a little girl. She'd grown just as he had. Her body hadn't been a girl's and while she hadn't quite had the curves she did now, she'd been well on her way. She'd also had a poise, a maturity that even girls older than him hadn't had.

He had to admit any other girl he would've pursued, taken any opening offered, it wouldn't have occurred to him not to. Dean had chosen girls intentionally that were looking to enjoy themselves as much as he was. Any broken hearts he'd left in his wake hadn't been deliberate and he hadn't lost any sleep over it, but even the idea of breaking Ella's had petrified him as much as the realization she could break his.

It'd been a fight to lock away his feelings, to try and ignore how she felt against him while they trained. At first he'd been frustrated to the point he'd been nasty to keep her at arm's length, but he hadn't been able to stomach the hurt in her eyes. He'd just ended up confusing them both. First running hot and then cold.

For weeks he'd planned it, a part of him had been hoping that for all he'd built her up in his head, kissing her would be like kissing a sister, or at the very least get it out of his system. Despite the fact he'd hit every first with a girl that one could, he'd had to fight to hide the clamminess of his palms and his pounding heart when he'd stolen that first kiss. It had only showed him exactly how much he wanted her. He'd tried to go back to keeping his distance terrified he'd take advantage of her.

Eventually he hadn't been able to keep his hands off her no matter what he told himself, just as he was afraid he wouldn't be able to now. Hell, who was he kidding, he wasn't even trying. Dean caressed her cheek as he continued to kiss her, unable to stop the memories as he felt her heart thudding at the pulse point in her neck.

His hand slipped to her waist, cupping her hip and pulling her closer as his other hand gently brushing her cheek before his fingers threaded into her hair drawing tilting her head back to take her deeper.

 _His lips touched hers in a sweet kiss, longer than the last, more than just a fleeting caress. He knew in that moment that he was her first real kiss, he could feel it in her momentary hesitation and her inexperience. He could taste her innocence as he brushed her lips with his tongue._

 _She took a couple steps back in surprise, backing herself into a tree, her hand raised to her lips, as she looked at him in confusion. He searched her face fearing he'd pushed too far, that he was trying to take something she wasn't ready to give._

 _His hand was still on her hip burning through the fabric of her t-shirt, under the jacket she wore against the coolness of early autumn. Her gaze drifted to his lips and she lifted her face to his. His hands slipped to her face, cupping her cheeks caressing her cheeks with his thumbs as he met her lips with his._

 _She was new to the dance, but she quickly learned the steps, her lips moving with his, her tongue dancing against his, her arms twining around him pressing herself closer. She was young, but her body was soft against him. Dean could feel her heart as it beat against his, pounding, their mingled breaths short._

 _He'd never wanted a girl the way he wanted Ella, never lost himself so completely as he did with her, but he fought to reign himself in. He struggled to remember he was two years older and no matter how much he wanted her, he knew she was too young. He wouldn't, couldn't take advantage of her, no matter how much the need for her burned through him. Any other girl, but not Ella. Hell, he'd normally would've ignored a girl her age, but mentally she was older than most of the girls he knew._

 _No matter how mature, she still wasn't ready, he told himself._

 _Forcing the kiss to slow, he pulled back. Her eyes were as heavy as his, her cheeks flushed, her lips rosy and swollen from his kiss. He couldn't stop himself from kissing her again, short soft kisses, before touching his forehead to hers and taking a deep breath._

The memory of the kiss she couldn't remember flitted through his mind. It'd left him wrecked and burning for her. He hadn't been prepared for Ella's response. It'd spurred him on, making him want so much more than was safe to take. It had been a good thing they'd needed to track Jessi down in the woods.

And their last kiss? He hadn't realized it was going to be their last.

Dean's free hand slid down her back to wrap his arm around her waist bringing her tightly against him, as if he could imprint himself on her like he hadn't been able to the last time.

She'd almost died in his arms, today had echoed that night too closely. The terror, the helplessness and the desperation he'd felt. Everything that had happened earlier that day had seemed like a distant dream.

Holding Ella while they'd kissed, while she'd come alive in his arms with a passion he hadn't expected had been hard to reconcile with holding her as she stood at the edge of death, it's chasm yawning in front of her. She'd laid dying in his arms in excruciating pain. It was amazing the pain alone hadn't killed her as it had those that had come before her. One tiny step and she would've slipped over that edge forever, what's more she'd begged him to let her.

It was the first time since the loss of his Mom that someone he'd cared about had almost died. He hadn't ever felt so helpless before and he hadn't been able to let that happen. Dean absolutely refused let her go, with everything in him he'd fought to hold on to her, to keep her alive.

He'd spent more time begging her to live than he had Sammy. He'd left his brother expecting he'd be okay in the safe room. When he'd gone to get his brother he'd discovered Sammy had been scratched by the same thing that was killing Ella, he'd been torn between them. Begging them both to fight, to survive. He'd had plenty of long nights over the years but nothing compared to that one.

When the sun had finally dawned and with it her fever had broken, he'd never experienced that kind of relief. Not before and not after.

The last thing he had expected that morning had been for Ella to kiss him, she'd been so sick, so weak still. The kiss had been so uncertain and hesitant. Tentative even and she'd been so dejected at his response. What had been surprise she'd taken for rejection and after everything that had happened he wasn't about to let her think he didn't want her.

Even more importantly death and terror had wrapped their icy hands around both Ella and Dean. He'd needed the feel of her lips against his. Warm and so thankfully alive. The near death experience combined with her desire had been potent. If she hadn't been hurt...

In that moment he'd known he couldn't leave her, when John decided it was time for them to get back on the road he wasn't going. He would learn more with the Jameson's than he ever would with his father. Sam would get better and they'd stay at the farm and train full time with the girls.

It had been only hours later that she'd been taken away. Up until Ella the only thing he'd ever wanted was his family back, his mother alive, and as much as he'd never admit it out loud the normal life they should've had. Just when he'd finally found something actually tangible that he wanted, a secret wish that wasn't impossible. Something that he could reach out and grab, it'd been ripped away.

He wrapped her even tighter in his arms, memorizing the feel of her against him. He kissed her until she couldn't catch her breath, until her legs weakened and he was the only thing holding her up.

When he pulled back his gaze burned into her, leaving her wondering what he had been thinking about as he kissed her. She found herself feeling a little dazed and it had nothing to do with the pain she'd been in or the medicine she'd taken.

The kiss had been sweet and gentle, until he'd slipped his hands into her hair, and then it had turned to fire. She'd felt his muscles go rigid under her hands and the brief impression of fear and anxiety, before she hadn't been able to think at all.

"You need food," Dean said taking a deep breath of the cold air, so cold it burned his lungs. He let it clear his head, smiling as Ella stumbled when he released her. Her eyes were glazed and her cheeks flushed. Her lips were plump, swollen and rosy from his kiss. His fingers twined around hers and he squeezed, gently, reassuringly. There was something so completely comforting and familiar about the gesture, Ella shook her head trying to clear it.

"Uh, yeah this way," she replied after a moment before starting down the alley still holding his hand. She veered right at its edge. Dean didn't let go of her hand even as they wove their way through the sidewalk traffic.

She glanced up to find Dean looking at her and gave him a soft smile, a slight blush adding additional color to her already flushed cheeks. Ella dropped her eyes and turned her attention back to leading him to the restaurant.

The diner sat on a corner, the glass blocks and neon lights giving it a decidedly 1950's feel. When they stepped inside Dean realized it wasn't one of those chain restaurants trying to recapture history, this was the real thing.

Everything was spotless and well cared for, repairs and replacements obviously made as needed, but nothing was brand new. The scents from the kitchen told him they were still making burgers as they had since they'd probably first opened their doors. It was rare to find a real diner that had survived to the present and those that did were usually incredible finds. Places he'd drive out of his way to visit when he was in that part of the country.

"Hey Ella," a blonde bombshell that filled out the pink uniform in a way that made most men glad they were alive waved and finished taking an order before walking their way. For the first time in a long time Dean found he wasn't really interested. However that didn't mean that he didn't admire the view.

"Hey Abby, how's Chloe?

"Growing like a weed. Hey thanks for putting a good word in, Walt's got me starting as a manager next week."

"Oh, I just pointed out the possibilities honey, you did it," Ella replied with a shrug. "You work hard, you're loyal, and you had the capability. You just had to realize it and Walt just needed to know you were interested."

"Walt will want to know you're here," Abby told Ella as she gestured toward a booth. "What can I get you to drink?"

"I'll take a vanilla coke, they make their own sodas, they're incredible."

"Count me in," Dean said with a brief smile as Abby moved on to check on her other customers.

"Ella, sweetheart, have you been feeling alright, it's been days," an older man called as he skirted tables to get to theirs.

"Just busy with school Walt," Ella replied with a chuckle. "I promise I'm not cheating on you, unless it's with the pub."

"I can't compete with what's just down stairs, and undeniably the best Irish food in the state."

"I can't argue with you there."

"So this must be your young man, the one Alaine told me about."

"Alaine?" Dean asked quietly.

"Madame Dumond," Ella told him with an exasperated smile, before looking back up at Walt. "I don't know if I'd call him my young man. This is Dean, he's an old family friend that's never been out this way. I'm just making sure he knows where to get some decent food.

"Sure, sure," Walt waved off her explanations as Ella tried to steer the conversation away from herself and Dean, while Dean just sat back and watched.

He couldn't help noticing Ella had such an easy way with people. One that could be an asset if she were ever allowed out in the field. It wouldn't take much to get a witness to spill their guts to her.

He half listened as Ella asked after Walt's family. Apparently his wife was in a tizzy about their upcoming fiftieth wedding anniversary and the party she was planning.

He shook his head, the idea of being with one person for that long was mind boggling and most likely out of the realm of possibility for Dean. There was a likelihood he might not make it to his next birthday let alone fifty years with one woman. He found himself a little jealous at the idea.

Even more mind boggling was the fact that the man had three granddaughters with his first grandson on the way. It wasn't surprising given he was at least in his late sixties if not his early seventies. Every now and then it hit Dean how much of life he wasn't likely to ever experience. Things the rest of the world took for granted.

He also couldn't help wondering, as a couple interrupted Ella's conversation with the older man to thank her for watching their three-year-old a few nights before, if there was anyone in the city that Ella didn't know.

As Walt waited patiently shooting him curious glances, Dean had a feeling the man had been talking his way around to something.

"Is everything alright Walt?" Ella asked as soon as the couple was out of earshot. Apparently thinking the same thing. "Not that I don't love shooting the breeze with you, but I get the feeling something's up."

"Can't ever get anything past you, can I Ella?"

The older man looked at Dean nervously and back to Ella.

"I'm just not sure if it's something we can talk about…"

"I told you he's a family friend, he's worked the family business for most of his life," Ella assured him. "There's nothing you can't say in front of him."

"It's my son."

"Jacob or Eli?"

"Eli, he just bought a house, with the baby on the way they needed more room," Walt looked at Ella meaningfully. "There's been some problems with the new house."

"Do I need to send someone in tonight or will it wait until morning?" Ella asked not missing a beat, her gaze sharpening.

"Oh no, no," Walt assured her. "Eli and Jenny haven't moved in yet they've been remodeling the place first, but the contractor's been complaining. There's been issues with the plumbing. The water keeps going on and off, the lights flicker even though they've updated the electrical, tools turning on even though they've been unplugged. Some of the contractors men are refusing to work there."

"Have they been complaining of cold spots, scratching in the walls, or seen anything?"

"All of it, one of the guys swears he's seen a woman," Walt told her. "I wouldn't bother you, but Eli and Jenny, they've sunk everything they have into fixing up that house."

"It's no bother Walt you know that,"Ella reassured him as she put her hand on his and squeezed comfortingly. "The tools worry me a little, it means the spirit's gaining power and possibly escalating. We wouldn't want anything to happen to the workers and especially not your family. Tell me where's the house?"

He rattled off an address and Ella's head tilted, her gaze looking up as she tried to place why it was familiar.

"Wasn't there a double homicide there four years ago?" She asked after a few moments. "A B&E that went south when the family came home early."

"I forgot all about it," Walt stammered, his face pale as he realized she was right. "The kids survived, but both parents died, it was tragic. I'd have never let them buy that house if I'd realized."

"It would need to be taken care of either way Walt. I'll let Uncle Jem know and we'll take care of it." She promised giving Walt's age spotted hand another squeeze. "It's as good as done, when your family moves in there won't be any problems. That is unless the ghost can't be eliminated, which is pretty unlikely."

"What happens if you can't? Eli and Jenny will lose everything."

"In that event, we'll buy it. Uncle Jem has been looking for a lot over that way. We'll take it off your hands and help your son find something else."

"Thank you so much Ella," Walt said, with tears in his eyes. "This girl's a peach I tell you, an absolute peach."

"I'm beginning to see that," Dean replied, giving Walt his best alter boy smile.

"Anything either of you want, it's on the house," Walt told them, he gestured for Abby as she finished up with another table. "Anything they want they get, my treat. I've got to call Eli."

Dean watched Walt disappear behind the kitchen door before he looked back at Ella. She could see he had questions but she gave a slight shake of her head. She tilted it slightly toward the waitress, silently telling him that while Walt most certainly knew the truth Abby didn't.

"Bacon cheeseburger, with pepper jack, medium rare on that burger Abby, closer to rare than medium," Ella ordered.

"A woman after my own heart, I'll take what she's having," Dean told the waitress, with a wink.

"Oh and some of that apple pie, ala mode for desert," when he looked at her, Ella smiled. "You asked if they have good pie, I figured you'd want it."

"Oh I never turn down pie," he responded holding up his hands before leaning forward. "So, do you usually trade food for jobs?"

"Walt's lived here for nearly sixty-eight years," she replied quietly after a brief glance around to make sure there was no one in earshot. "His father had an issue when he was a boy. Grandda's brother Cian owned Jameson's and took care of it at that time. The family's that have been here for a while have needed our expertise from time to time. Most of the well established businesses are owned by these families. When there's an issue they let us know and we take care of it. We trade work on occasion. We'd take care of Walt's problem either way but he'd be insulted if I suggested it."

Dean nodded, and looked out the window, it was odd that an established hunting family would have so many people that knew, but then if they'd been doing it as long as Ella had said it made sense. There had been "repeat customers" over the years, very few, but there were those that had seen the supernatural and put in a call to John or even Dean if something was up. It made sense to have those that were capable of it to keep their eyes open, it would certainly help, and cut down on the truth is out there speech.


	15. Chapter 15

"How far is your Uncle's reach in this town?" Dean asked, cocking his head curiously. It would probably be a good idea to get a picture of what kind of power he was dealing with. He'd only dealt with the girls grandparents and Rico, he'd only met Jem after Rico's death. There'd been people coming in and out of the farm for information or help, but he'd never realized the full scale of the Jameson's. He hadn't had to until now, if he had to cut and run it would be best to know exactly how far off the grid he might have to go, how far he might have to take the girls. He was in this now, there was no way he'd leave the girls alone this time if something went to hell.

"Pretty far, South Bend's the heart of his territory. Jameson's been an institution for the police department and fire department since they were built for obvious reasons." she replied sitting back as Abby brought their drinks.

Ella paused to smile and thank the woman before continuing. "There are a good amount of police officers and firefighters that are second and third generation, obviously they know. Right now the chief of police and at least twenty-five of his officers know about what likes to play in the dark. They call us into handle what they can't and in return they help us bury what we do. Most of the Guardians have deep roots and with those roots come connections. It makes things a little easier to work when you use those connections to make certain you don't have a record."

"Must be nice."

"It isn't bad. I assume you have a record?"

"Do I seem like a bad boy to you?"

"Do you really want me to answer that?" she retorted. She leaned back as Abby came back with their meal. He could see Ella thinking as she put catsup, mustard and mayo on her burger, passing the condiments off to him once she'd finished.

"You know Uncle Jem has some contacts, there's a computer hacker we use from time to time, he owes me a favor," she said, as she picked up her burger. He raised an eyebrow. "I could talk to him. See what can be done about your record. If you decide to work with us like we discussed earlier, I can handle police, keep them off your tail."

"Really? So I take a job, let's say in Tennessee. You're going to make sure the police don't get wind of it?"

"Grandda's sister Eileen married into the Riley family, they have territory in Memphis and Nashville."

"What about New Orleans?"

"New Orleans is a roll of the dice, it's a little lawless. It used to be my Uncle Gabe and my Aunt Elise's territory. No one's taken it over since then, but we might still have some connections." Ella replied quietly. Her amusement vanishing as she looked out the window.

"Used to be?" He repeated, glancing at him she saw the sympathy in his eyes.

"Gabe and Elise were Jessi's parents," her voice was emotionless, almost toneless as she spoke. "They raised Jessi and me until they died when we were six. We were sent from New Orleans to Nana and Grandda in Colorado when they died."

"Ella…" he began covering her hand with his.

"It's alright," she cut him off. "It was a long time ago."

Wisely he turned to his burger, until she stopped playing with her food and began to eat again.

"Where are you staying?" she asked suddenly.

"I wasn't sure I was going to stay in town," he gave a shrug speaking as he finished off the last of his burger. "I slept in Baby last night, but I'll find a motel tonight."

"Baby?"

"My car," he told her a little sheepishly.

"Ah, I see," Ella chuckled, shaking her head.

Dean was a little surprised at how easily the conversation flowed between them, though he couldn't say that he'd often spent much time talking with a woman.

Of course he really couldn't remember the last time he'd had more than a couple of drinks with a woman either. It helped that Ella knew exactly what he was and it was something they could talk about relatively openly. He found she still knew as much, if not more, than he did about the various creatures he'd hunted over the years.

They were walking back toward the apartment when they heard the desperate feminine whimper coming from an alleyway.

"Stay here," Dean ordered, his hand going to the gun at his back as he headed down the nearly black alley.

Ella ignored him, following him into the darkness without thought. A man stood midway down the alley, his hand outstretched. A young woman was choking. She clawed at her throat uselessly, fighting to breathe. The man wasn't touching her, but it was clear from the look on the man's face that he was the cause.

Peering through the darkness Ella tried to force her eyes to adjust from the street lights only a few yards away. There was an odd sensation as if a camera shutter were opening and focusing in her eye. Blinking she found she could see perfectly. At just that moment the man glanced back at her.

" _Ostende te_ ," Ella commanded softly. His eyes flickered turning to solid black. "It's a demon Dean."

"Shit," he hissed. "What do we do for a demon Ella?"

"I see you," the demon said, tilting his head and looking at her as if she were a particularly interesting bug.

The woman slid to the ground wheezing as she took a breath, the pressure from her neck released as the demon's focus now turned to Ella. "What are you?"

"Back off," Dean warned the demon stepping in front of Ella, blocking her from its sight.

All three of them moved in a circular pattern while Dean continued to hold the gun level at the demon. Not that it would do any good; not unless the bullet had been marked. It needed the sigil of the Angel of Death and Ella was pretty sure those weren't rounds he even knew how to make; let alone carried.

However, the demon didn't know whether or not Dean had the right rounds. Until he fired his weapon it couldn't know for sure and they might be able to buy some time. Ella sidestepped until she reached the poor lady who couldn't do anything but tremble. Shock had definitely set in.

"I don't suppose you're packing holy water?" Ella asked her eyes still locked on the demon as she helped the woman slowly to her feet.

"Fresh out," Dean replied as they circled back and Ella pushed the woman behind them both.

The demon watched as she took the knife from her belt, the edges had been dipped in silver and cooled in salt water, the bone handle marked with warding against evil and witchcraft. She could see the stiffness of the creature and the uncertainty in its eyes. Its hand was held out but he couldn't do more than make Dean's hands on the gun waver. It appeared that there was at least a little luck on their side.

Ella couldn't help wishing it was Jessi with her rather than Dean. Her cousin would know what was in her mind without her having to say anything. Jessi would also know what they were up against. It had to be a low level demon, an imp really on its first jaunt topside. If it were older or higher up in the hierarchy it would have had Dean holding his own gun to his head by now.

Unfortunately, she wasn't strong enough to take a demon on in hand to hand combat and while Dean could, he'd need her knife to inflict any damage, even then her knife wouldn't kill the demon, it would cause harm to the human and probably barely phase something that was used to the tortures of hell.

Even if she could get the knife to Dean they'd kill the human trying to wound the demon enough to just get away.

Ella's mind tumbled over and over, trying to find a solution and coming up empty handed. The creature smiled slowly. It was the smile of someone without a conscious or a soul, it sent shivers through Ella. They had mere minutes at the most.

" _Kala_ ," she cried. The ancient Hebrew word wouldn't work without the proper sigils for a trap but the word slipped from her lips before she even realized what she was saying.

Once a demon was inside such a trap it was possible to command them, but they hadn't trapped it. She might as well have started shouting gibberish and hoping it would work as try to command a demon without sigils compelling it.

To her shock the demon froze, it's immediate reaction to throw its head back with the intention of evacuating the human it possessed. Its throat worked, its mouth tried to open, but the demon found it wasn't able to move.

"What was that?" Dean demanded looking from her to the demon, she shook her head the very thought of what she had just done terrified her.

Commanding demons solely on an individual's power alone wasn't a Guardian trait. Ella had heard of it being done before of course, but only by dark witches, necromancers that enslaved and compelled demons to do their bidding. It took years to gain the power and it was as dark as one could get.

"Ella, what did you just do?" Dean yelled snapping her out of her stunned daze.

"I trapped it. _Kala_ , the ancient Hebrew word for shut up and restrain. It stops the demon from leaving a body it's possessed and it holds it in place," she heard her own voice speaking calmly as if from far away.

"Neat trick, you'll have to teach me that one."

Ella shook her head fighting to keep the unhinged laugh from slipping from her lips. She had to focus, they weren't out of danger yet.

She might have commanded the demon, but she had no idea how long she could hold it. Once it was free it would kill her before she could trap it again. It might be young and low level but one flick of it's wrist and it could still break her neck. Then it would kill Dean. They didn't have the weapons to handle a full attack…

"For how long?" Dean questioned echoing her thoughts.

"Give me your gun," she told him, the barest outline of an idea coming to her.

"What?" He snapped.

"Give me your gun," she repeated, he looked at her for a moment before he handed it to her. Swiftly she looked down at the 1911 making sure it was pointed in a safe direction as she unloaded it.

"What the hell are you doing Ella? You don't unload a weapon in the middle of a fight, that's just simple common sense."

"You do when you aren't carrying the proper rounds," Ella snapped gesturing with her knife. "Here hold this for a second, it won't kill the demon, but it will hurt it."

She took the bullet that had rolled out of the chamber and into her hand before taking her knife back. Carefully she carved the sigil for the angel of death into the lead.

" _Lebira nos a malo_ ," she whispered.

"What are you doing?"

"Giving these bullets the capability of killing a demon," she told him.

Using her thumb to push another bullet from the magazine into her hand she replaced it with the carved one. She didn't dare take the time to carve them all, but she carved a second as backup.

Dean couldn't help but watch with admiration as she replaced the bullet, her gaze returning to the demon as she slid the magazine back into the gun with a decisive click and racked the bullet into the chamber. Damn it was sexy to watch a woman handle a gun with such expertise. She raised the gun and pointed it steadily at the demon.

"Dean get the woman out of here and call Jessi, I'm going to need some supplies for an exorcism."

"What about you?"

"If the demon so much as flinches I'll put this bullet through its brain."

He hesitated and she knew he'd feel better if it were him facing down a demon instead of her. It was his automatic instinct to protect her but right now he had to trust her and let her protect him.

"You're bluffing," the demon said, her hand tightened on the gun as it spoke, but it didn't move beyond that, apparently still trapped. It gave her a condescending smile.

"Am I? You must be used to amateurs; the bullets are carved with the sigil of the Angel of Death. All I had to do was whisper 'Deliver us from evil' in Latin and I had bonafide demon killing rounds," Ella explained. Her voice pitched as if she were talking to a small child.

"So just kill it already." Dean suggested with frustration.

"No," Ella told him, "We can't, that will kill the human it's possessing. I don't want to do that unless there's no other choice."

"You wouldn't," the demon said quietly, that smile that sent shivers down her spine slipping over his face. "You couldn't bear to kill an innocent, it's not in you."

"I absolutely will, if I have to." she promised, the demon's cool façade was starting to crack, he could see the resolve in her eyes. "Get the woman out of here and call Jessi and make sure she doesn't get Uncle Jem. Tell her to come to the Temple, she'll know where that is."

"Damn it," Dean hissed as he took out his phone and dialed, raising it to his ear he half lifted the woman back to her feet. She'd crumbled to the ground as they'd been talking, sobbing weakly. Dean guided her towards the street intending to get her in a taxi and be done with it.

"If you kill the harmless Good Samaritan trapped in here with me, it'll start you on a dark road, sweetheart. You're not ready for that."

"I'll have to risk it," Ella warned the demon, iron in her voice. She kept her eyes steadily on it, her hands never wavering and her jaw tight with resolve. The demon glared but decided it would be a bad choice to test her.

"Jessi," Dean said breathlessly as Jessi answered the phone.

"I just got in from my shift, where are you?" she asked curiously, sighing tiredly, it'd been a long night before her shift had even begun.

"A few blocks west; we went to the diner…"

"Walt's place?" Jessi asked curiously suppressing a yawn.

She was irritatingly oblivious to the direness of their situation. She didn't hear the fear and worry in his tone, for somebody that claimed to be an empath she was woefully ignorant in that department at the moment. In reality she was bone tired and blocking her powers, unable to handle much more after the day she'd had.

"Yes Walt's place, damn it, we ran into some trouble." he snapped.

"What kind of trouble?" She said, her senses coming alive. She heard it now, the fear, the worry.

"We ran across a demon attack, Ella's holding it."

"What do you mean holding it?"

"I mean she's holding it, she carved some sigil into a couple of my bullets. She says it will kill the demon and the person possessed if she uses it."

"She's buying time, the bullet will work, she just won't use it unless she has no other choice," Jessi told him absently heading to her room. "What's her plan?"

"She wants you to get the supplies for an exorcism," he told her.

"Supplies for an exorcism?" she demanded as she grabbed her boots from her closet and plopped on her bed to get them on. "We don't exorcise demons, we kill them. I'll get Jem on my way out. He can handle it."

"No Jessi, Ella doesn't want Jem involved, she wants you to come alone and with the supplies. Bring it to the Temple."

"This doesn't make sense."

"Jessi we don't have time for a play by play here, are you going to meet us or not?"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm on my way," she told him snapping the phone closed as she reached out with her powers. She could feel Ella's fear, adrenaline and her sheer determination.

With effort Jessi brought herself back and refocused on the problem at hand. The Temple was a nightclub just a few blocks down from Walt's, it'd been shut down recently, it's liquor license revoked for serving to minors. She could cut through the alleys to get there in only a few minutes if she was quick.

Grabbing her go bag from the shelf in her closet, she checked to find it already stocked with holy water, salt, holy oil, and a security alarm scrambler, along with her journal.

She grabbed her gun from the top drawer of her dresser, dropping the magazine and pulling out her back up that held the bullets already carved with demon killing rounds. Racking the first bullet into the chamber she slipped it back into its holster and slid it next to the knife on the belt she already wore.

Jessi didn't know what was going on or what Ella was thinking. She couldn't understand why Ella wanted to keep it from Jem. If Jessi went to her uncle, he'd arm them with a demon killing blade.

He'd give Jessi one the moment he sent her out on the test hunt anyway. For a moment she wondered if she could get her hands on one, there'd inevitably be one in the weapons rack hidden behind the books in his office.

Shaking her head, she knew it wasn't an option, it would be spelled, Jem would know the minute she tried to open it. Whatever reason Ella had for not involving Jem, it had to be a good one, her cousin wasn't one to deviate from protocol without one.

She had to focus on protecting and helping Ella and Dean. Once they were safe she could ask questions. Ones that Ella better have some really good answers to. Her priority was to get to the Temple and to do it fast.

Bundling her hair back, Jessi pulled out her nightstand drawer grabbing her handcuffs and tossing them in the duffle, without bothering to shut the drawer. Turning swiftly she scooped up four half burnt candles from her dresser.

Black candles would've been better, but white would have to do, beggars and all that. Ella would just have to work with what Jessi could find.

She dropped the candles into the bag, zipping it up, she pulled the strap over her shoulder as she hurried through the apartment trying to figure out what to draw a circle with. She'd come up against plenty of creatures over the years, but a demon hadn't been one of them. They didn't have the time for chalk, it took too long and was too precarious.

Jessi very much doubted the demon was going to hold still while they drew a devil's trap and she had no idea of how long Ella could continue to hold it with only a bullet to deter it from doing something stupid.

Until every sigil was drawn they couldn't fix the circle in place keeping it from smudging. Jessi needed something that wouldn't smear within minutes of drawing it, if the sigils were damaged they'd be screwed.

Snapping her fingers, her face lit up as an idea came to her. Jem had bought spray paint a few months before to stencil no parking area's on the walls that faced the alley behind the bar as well as marking the fire lanes and loading areas.

Scooping up another two candles from the breakfast bar she checked the hallway as she slipped them into her bag. She grabbed her coat and threw it on as she shut the door behind her.

Finding the hallway deserted, she lightly jogged down it grateful Jem's office was dark. She took the stairs two at a time until she reached the bottom. Just down the hallway leading to the kitchen she slipped into the supply room. If she remembered correctly Jem had stored the remaining paint at the back.

"Jackpot," she breathed in relief as she found four cans of red paint. Jessi added them to the duffle before she zipped it closed and left the room forgetting to shut the door behind her in her rush.

Standing on her tiptoes Jessi disabled the emergency exit and snuck out into the night. Jem would be furious if he found out but it was the only way out where she wouldn't run into anyone. If Ella didn't want Jem to know what was going on she needed to get out of the bar without being seen. Desperate times and all...

Jessi heard the door slam behind her flinching at the sound. Hopefully the bar was still loud enough that no one had heard that. She took off at a sprint, slipping through the shadows of the ally and cutting around a boutique. She took every shortcut she could think of before finally coming to the empty nightclub.

It was almost eerie to see it sitting silently on the corner, no longer bustling despite the businesses all around that were busy. She kept to the shadows. No one paid her any attention as she drew the dark around her effectively hiding herself from plain sight. Slinking around the building to the deserted alley behind it and the back entrance, she found the back door had been left slightly ajar. Dean had obviously cut the wires for the security alarm and picked the lock. It was rough work, but it did the trick. It was probably for the best really there would be more questions if she'd used the scrambler.

"Jessi," there was relief in Ella's voice as she caught sight of her cousin. Ella held the gun pointed steadily at the dark haired man in a long wool trench coat. He looked so normal to Jessi. A bit like a lawyer. A little too polished and a little smarmy but not someone she would've picked out on the street as a demon.

She closed her eyes feeling the Guardian sight taking over making it easier to see through the dark room. The smell of the demon made her gag forcing her to breathe through her mouth as she dropped the duffle.

"Okay Ella I'm here, what's your plan? You didn't want Jem and you're going to exorcise the demon. Neither of which would be protocol and therefore not at all your first move."

"Take the gun Dean," Ella said calmly, she was a little too calm. There was almost a brittleness to her as if she were fighting through terror to do what needed to be done. Jessi drew her own gun as Dean took his gun from Ella. Facing a demon wasn't exactly a walk in the park but it wasn't something that should have Ella this shaken up.

When Dean had the gun leveled at the demon, Jessi holstered her own as she knelt next to Ella and her bag. Oddly the demon continued to just stand there. Watching and waiting, not making even the slightest move to attack. It wasn't attempting to bolt, or even evacuate the human it possessed. Even more curious was how had Ella and Dean managed to get it to the Temple without any of those three things happening. Either they were dealing with an incredibly stupid demon or something else was going on. An icy shiver slid down Jessi's back.

"Why wouldn't you want to exorcise the demon?" Dean asked curiously, glancing back and meeting Jessi's gaze for a moment before he turned back to the demon. He shifted uncomfortably as Jessi's eyes snapped to Ella.

"Did you manage to draw an invisible trap Ella?" Jessi asked realizing the demon was behaving as if he'd been commanded, trapped in the spot they were holding him.

"Because if you just do an exorcism you might send the demon back to hell, but you have no guarantee it won't climb out," Ella replied absently answering Dean while ignoring Jessi entirely. Jessi's eyes narrowed.

Ella riffled through the contents of the bag before Jessi could ask anything else. Carefully she avoided Jessi's gaze and finished her explanation for Dean.

"It's not common, but it does happen, and after revisiting the tortures of hell, demons tend to be particularly vicious if they do manage to get out again. Spray paint?"

She looked up at Jessi curiously one of the cans in her hand.

"It's all I could think of." Jessi told her slightly irritably, trying to figure out what in the hell was going on.

"No, it's genius," Ella replied as she tossed a can to Jessi and took one herself.

Shaking the can Ella moved to where the demon stood and began spraying the floor. Dean watched curiously still keeping the gun on the demon.

Jessi pulled out her journal, flipping through until she reached the trap associated with the ritual they needed. Ella brushed it aside painstakingly beginning to draw the sigils without needing a guide.

Not able to handle the field my ass, Jessi thought as she pretended uncertainty and Ella directed her absently on what to draw.

Moving with confidence Ella drew the trap as if she'd been doing it for years rather than for the first time. She moved with confidence, completely certain of every sigil she carefully drew. The only time she paused was to blow on the sigils in an attempt to dry them faster.

When she finally sat back Jessi took the candles setting them at six points around the circle before lighting them and stepping back.

"Kala." Ella said quietly, but firmly. Jessi breathed a sigh of relief. Whatever Ella had done or told the demon, it was trapped absolutely now.

"Alright, we're set, let's do this." Jessi said rubbing her hands together, before she picked up her journal offering it to Ella, already opened to the words needed for the exorcism.

"You know I'll be back." the demon vowed its eyes boring into Ella.

"Perhaps you'll crawl back, but if you're stupid enough to find me afterward just know next time I'll end you," Ella returned, her eyes glittering with cold promises. "I'll be the last thing you'll ever see."


	16. Chapter 16

Brushing aside Jessi's journal, she began to chant, she spoke Latin, so it hadn't been difficult for her to memorize the words for the most commonly used rituals.

Ella's voice echoed across the empty dance floor. Jessi could feel Ella weakening which was odd. Taking a breath Jessi added her voice and her strength to Ella's.

As they spoke together, Jessi found herself grateful that it had been Ella instead of her with Dean. She would've killed the demon, considering the sacrifice of the innocent in this case for the greater good, or she might've tried to draw it out and kill it getting herself and Dean killed in the process.

It took only a couple seemingly minute changes in the ritual they were performing that would pull the demon from its host giving it corporeal form, but giving it such a form made demons stronger. There were limitations when they were riding a human.

Limitations that didn't restrict them once they were freed and allowed to take their true form without the need to possess anything. They didn't have anything strong enough to kill it if they drew it out. Their options were limited without Jem and the appropriate tools which neither of them had access to at this point.

Though they were inside the empty nightclub a chilling wind swirled around them, creating a vortex that centered around the demon. The candle flames danced madly as it whimpered, lumps running under the man's skin moving up and toward his mouth. The sounds of incoherent whispering rose as both of the girl's hair lifted and swirled, dancing wildly in the wind. Dean just watched in fascination.

"Maybe I'll find you first Eleanor Jameson, maybe I'll take you out before you even realize I've clawed my way out." the demon choked out, before the man's mouth gaped wide open and dark smoke poured out.

It swirled above them for a moment before being yanked down and dissipating into the floor. The innocent crumpled to the floor, out cold, which was probably for the best.

"Maybe," Ella agreed softly, exhaustion settling in. "But who's to say next time I won't be stronger?"

Silence filled the room as the candles returned to flickering in the normal drafts of the room. For a moment it felt as if they were in a subzero fridge and then it eased until at last there was nothing. The light danced over Ella's face, she'd gone dead pale yet again.

"Ella are you alright?" Jessi asked taking a step towards her, but Dean was already there. Ella stared blankly into a candle flame as if mesmerized.

"I'm fine, I just want to go home," Ella whispered tightly her eyes snapping to meet Jessi's. They were blank, whatever emotion Ella had felt carefully controlled. Ella allowed Dean to wrap an arm around her helping to support her.

Jessi let her eyes slide back and forth between them. Lightly, she scanned Ella again. She found nothing out of the ordinary, except tightly controlled terror and fatigue.

"An exorcism shouldn't wipe you out this badly, Ella, even with the earlier drama. What's going on?"

"She was controlling the demon." Dean answered in exasperation, "of course she's exhausted. You have really got to teach me how you do that."

"Damn it Dean." Ella mumbled, closing her eyes and rubbing her temples.

"What do you mean controlling it?" Jessi asked suspiciously, her heart rate picking up painfully, her eyes staring at her cousin in concern.

"I mean she controlled it. She said something in Hebrew and it did whatever she told it to do." Dean said looking at Ella in confusion before his eyes narrowed.

"Oh my God." Jessi said, slowly rising to her feet, staring at Ella through the haze of the candles she'd just blown out. "That's why you didn't want me to get Jem. How is that even possible?

"Of course that's why. Can we discuss this when we get home? I need to lay down." Ella said, irritation and pure exhaustion coloring her voice.

"Is this something we need to handle now?" Dean demanded looking worriedly from Jessi to Ella and back again. Ella just closed her eyes tiredly and rubbed at her forehead absently.

"No," Jessi sighed, her own earlier exhaustion setting back in. "I'll clean this up and meet you back at the apartment, after I get this poor schmuck home."

"Just leave the candles," Ella suggested. "We can't clean up the spray paint. So wipe our prints after you break the circle. I'm betting the police will just think it was stupid teenagers that broke in."

"After they check with Jem, which means we can't hide this for long Ella."

"I don't expect to; I just need some time to do some research before Jem finds out."

"You'll be lucky if we have twenty-four hours." Jessi pointed out, unable to mask her disapproval of keeping it from him at all.

"I know, just trust me Jessi," Ella's voice was almost desperate. "I need to how I did this before we tell Jem anything, because as of right now the only thing capable of commanding or compelling a demon without a trap is a necromancer with years of experience and power gained through torture.

Since I have neither the experience, nor have I practiced blood magic, I need to know where the power came from. I need to know if any other Guardian has ever had the power because if they haven't we might very well have ruined any chance of me returning to any level of hunting. It'll be shut down before we've ever started."

"I don't think Jem would do that, he's worked too hard to get us here."

"Do you think he'll bury it? He's head of the family Jessi! That means he has to look at what's best for the Jameson's not just me. If I'm manifesting dark powers the best thing for everyone is that I walk away now."

"There's nothing dark about you Ella, I can attest to that, nothing out of the ordinary that is."

"Good to know, but you weren't here when I used the power Jessi. You don't know where it came from any more than I do," Ella countered. "I'll get up early tomorrow and go through what I can get into in Jem's library, I'll bring it home and figure it out. Hopefully I'll have some answers before Jem has questions."

"Ella, look whatever this is we'll figure it out," Dean spoke up for the first time. He turned her cupping her cheeks and looking at her directly. "Your grandfather used to say that you had a light in you. One that the darkness couldn't dim. You have a strength in you to fight, I've seen it. If there's any darkness in you, you'll fight it, we'll help you."

Ella blinked back the tears at his unexpected support, he wrapped his arms around her, her head fitting just under his chin as he held her. She trembled in his arms keying him in to just how exhausted and unnerved she really was. His eyes met Jessi's over Ella's head. Jessi's eyes gleamed with the same worry he felt.

Whatever this was, whatever was going on the three of them would figure it out somehow.

"Take her home Dean, I'll be there as quick as I can."

Jessi finished cleaning up what she could and poured the poor jackass that had gotten himself possessed into a cab. She might've felt sorry for him if he hadn't tried to grab her ass twice on the way out. She'd pegged him right on, he was a smarmy bastard.

She handed the cabbie a handful of bills with orders to take the man anywhere he wanted to go. A few blocks or across the city the driver would end up with a hefty tip which made him less inclined to ask questions. She did a sweep of the property, dodging the security cameras. She was thankful that the one in the back had been taken out by vandals.

The police would figure delinquents just as Ella had suggested, but they'd take pictures of the circle and pass them on to Jem just to be sure. The moment he saw the sigils he'd know exactly who was behind it.

Jem was too vigilant not to know exactly which Hunters and Guardians were in his city. Too many of the Guardian's and Hunters knew Jem's territory and wouldn't be hunting in the city or the outlying areas without telling him. With no one claiming it and no one in town that could've done it, that would leave Ella and Jessi or Dean.

Jem knew as well as she did that Dean wouldn't know how to draw those Sigils. She doubted they had much past first light tomorrow morning before the cops got called into the building. Jem would be asking questions and Jessi had no intention of hiding this from him. Only her loyalty to Ella kept her from calling him now.

If she knew her uncle he'd tell the cops it was vandals, as he was hunting the girls down for an explanation. Jessi rubbed her temples as the headache that had been threatening all night began to throb steadily. She needed to get home. She needed her sweats, a warm fire, a heavy blanket and a drink damn it.

When she opened the door to the apartment she found Dean much as she'd left him before leaving to talk with Jem before her shift.

"Hey." He greeted her.

"Hey," she replied as she dumped her bag heavily on the floor and removed her coat. She saw a plate with crumbs, a beer without a coaster and a bottle of Jack sitting next to a glass. Jessi winced, Ella would have a litter of kittens if she saw the drinks without coasters. "I'll need some of that Jack."

"I'll get a glass," Dean told her, he picked up the plate and the empty beer bottle carrying them into the kitchen.

"I'll be right back," she called, she paused halfway down the hall. "Hey Dean where are you staying tonight?"

"There's a hotel just down the block,"

"Please tell me you're not thinking of the Red Roof Inn," Jessi asked after retraced her steps and pausing in the doorway of the kitchen. "They rent the rooms there by the hour."

"Got any better options?"

"Yeah, with everything going on right now, I think you should stay here, you can bunk on the couch," Jessi told him. "It's far more comfortable than some bed you might get an STD from just looking at, let alone sleeping in. Besides, I could use the backup if something more goes down."

"What else could possibly go down?" Dean asked eyeing her curiously as he tossed the beer bottle in the trash.

"We just exorcised a demon instead of killing it, a demon that knows Ella has the ability to command them without a circle. That demon has a pretty heavy bargaining chip to use in hell."

"How big?"

"There's a reason they call it hell Dean, there's a reason when you're trying to describe the worst thing possible you use hell as an adjective. It's never ending pain and torment, which is why they tend to be pissed if they get out again. This info would definitely be enough to give it a breather from the pain, it's possibly big enough to get it topside again if it plays it's cards right. We don't have very much time before that info gets out and key topside demons get the memo. Something will be coming." Jessi said with heat in her voice as she rubbed her neck and the tension that lived there.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Dean demanded freezing in the process of grabbing another glass from the fourth cupboard he'd opened looking for them.

"God I wish." Jessi said taking the glass from his momentarily paralyzed hand before he broke i and heading back to the living room to the bottle of Jack, "Does it look like I'm joking? There's nothing even remotely funny about any of this. Why couldn't you have just stayed your happy ass on the couch where I left you?"

"I was hungry; you guys didn't have much food that doesn't have to be cooked and there was no way when Ella got up she was in any shape to be cooking anything," Dean argued.

"What you couldn't?"

"And you could?"

"Nana taught me to cook, just because I don't doesn't mean I can't," Jessi retorted.

"I'll remember that the next time we're on a hunt," Dean told her, "but I did offer to order in. Ella chose to go out, she said the fresh air would do her good, I didn't argue."

Jessi gave him a sideways glance as she refilled his glass with a generous amount of the liquor. She set the bottle down and took a healthy swig.

"I'm sure." She muttered eyeing him over the glass, "Are you sure you weren't trying to reschedule the date you two didn't get last night?"

"I don't date Jessi," Dean growled warningly, she jerked her shoulder and conceded, for now.

"I suppose it was too much to ask that you not drag my cousin into a hunt?"

"Please, Jessi. We both know you wouldn't have done anything differently than I did," Dean pointed out. "I told Ella to stay back, she didn't. You can't expect either one of us to have just left an innocent woman to die.'

She shrugged at him and plopped down on the couch, no she couldn't.

"Where's Ella?"

"In her room, she was pretty pissy when we got back," Dean sighed. "If it hadn't felt like I'd be kicking her while she was down, I'd have snapped back."

"Is she awake?"

"Hell if I know."

"I'll check on her. I doubt she's fallen asleep yet, she's scared down to her bones I could see it at the Temple. More than likely she's hurting again and too stubborn to take any more meds." Jessi told him taking a fortifying drink from her glass before rolling heavily to her feet. "I'll be back."

"Good luck. For those about to die we salute you."

"Isn't it supposed to be for those about to rock?"

"Artistic license."

"Artistic bullshit."

Dean saluted her with his glass, she gave him a brief smile before she squared her shoulders and headed into her cousin's room.

"Couldn't knock?" Ella snapped, Jessi let her cousin's anger roll off her, turning her attention to how Ella looked.

She sat in the middle of her still made bed, her arms wrapped around her knees, Ella looked lost and terrified. Jessi noted the can of Coke on Ella's nightstand. At least she'd been smart enough to get some sugar in her.

"Ella, you need to sleep," Jessi said sitting on the bed next to Ella and rubbing a comforting hand up and down her arm.

"How?" Ella asked, her voice cracking. "Since I was fourteen the family has treated me like there was a monster in me, just under the surface and it looks like they were right."

"No, they weren't," Jessi told her firmly, her anger at the family carefully controlled. "Don't go there Ella, don't you dare go there. Just because we haven't heard of this power being used before doesn't make you dark. You used it to save that woman, and the asshole that was possessed. I may not have been there when you used it but using powers like that leaves a mark. It leaves a darkness I would be able to sense. You don't feel any different right now than you did a few days ago."

"Jessi, if I go dark …"

"We're not going there Ella, you're not going to go dark, that's it," Jessi cut her off sharply. "I don't think you have it in you no matter what Nana said, and trust me Nana's off her freaking rocker, so take anything she says with a grain of salt."

"Jessi…" Ella began again, tears in her eyes.

"No Ella, no," Jessi replied sternly, but a touch more gently this time. Ella rolled her eyes as Jessi stood. "I can see the pain in your eyes, I'm going to get you some more medicine and then you're going to sleep."

Dean met Jessi coming out of Ella's room, he raised an eyebrow and Jessi responded with a jerk of her shoulder.

She refused believe that Ella could go dark, she just couldn't and she couldn't even think of taking Ella out. The fact that Ella now had a reason to believe that Nana could be right had her wishing she could strangle the woman with her bare hands. At the moment, grandmother or not she was pretty sure she could accomplish it too.

Ella looked up to see Dean standing in her doorway. As Jessi pushed past him, Ella watched as they exchanged looks.

"Feeling better?" he asked moving into her room, his hands had been shoved in his pockets and his eyes were hooded as they studied her.

"I'm sorry," she said softly, her arms wrapping around her knees again. "I was a bitch when we got back."

"Your words not mine."

"But true, I don't know what to do," she looked up at him, her expression so lost, so afraid. He sat in nearly the same spot Jessi had, brushing back the hair that fell into her face. She flinched away from his touch.

"It's going to be alright Ella."

"You don't know that any more than Jessi does, please don't offer me useless platitudes."

Her words had heat to them, but she looked so damn tired.

"What do you want me to do? Tell you that you're evil? That the world would be better off without you hunting? I'm not going to do that." Dean replied with a touch of his own heat, putting a tentative hand on her arm.

"Dean…"

"No, what you did scares the shit out of me. I'm not going to lie, but I can't see you as evil Ella. The power threw you for a loop, but you managed to put it aside and use it to our advantage. If anything that makes me think that your family was dead wrong to ban you from the field. I don't know many that would have kept their heads the way you did. You'll do your research and I'll help. I bet we can even rope Jessi into helping. We'll figure out what is going on."

"I don't think it's going to be that simple," she sighed, leaning her head against his shoulder as he wrapped his arm around her. There was something so comforting about him. A feeling of being safe. "Promise me something Dean."

"I'm not going to promise to take you down Ella."

"Who can I trust? What if I become everything that Nana is afraid I'll become? Do you really think Jessi can hunt me down and take me out?"

"No one is going to need to take you out Ella," Dean argued, but he could see her fear, it was almost a living breathing thing in her. Terror at what she could become, of what she could do, of who she could hurt.

"Then promise me this, promise you'll protect Jessi no matter the cost," she countered, her eyes meeting his, begging him. "Promise you'll protect yourself no matter what you have to do."

"Alright Ella, I'll promise that." he finally agreed after a moment, there was logic in what she asked and room for him to maneuver, he told himself. He didn't have to be the one that struck a death blow. He could incapacitate her if it came to it and hope to hell they could figure out a way to fix her.

Jessi could hear Dean and Ella talking, the deeper rumble of Dean's voice reassuring her cousin as she flicked on the light in the bathroom, she pulled out the med kit Ella kept stocked in the cabinet under the sink. It wasn't really pain killers that Ella needed at this point. More than anything she needed sleep.

Only Jem and Ellen had kits as complete as Ella did, they'd all done turns in Sylvie's clinic learning how to handle anything short of an actual surgery. Jessi had done a brief stint, only enough to learn the basics but Ella had nearly every medicine that could possibly be needed.

Sylvie's nurse, Julie kept close watch over the meds. Given what they did and how often they were injured it was too easy for a Guardian to become addicted to prescription meds. Most of the meds would end up expiring before they were ever used and Julie would send out replacements when that happened. Ella had practically a full pharmacy in the box. Everything from Tylenol to IV bags and morphine were carefully labeled and arranged.

Picking up and discarding a few bottles, she finally found the sleeping pills. Shaking one into her hand she set the bottle on the counter and carried it back to Ella.

"Take this," she ordered holding out the pill. Ella took it and the coke that Jessi handed over to her.

"What is it?" Ella asked rolling the pill in her hand.

"Something to help you sleep," Jessi informed her. "You need to sleep. You've worked yourself too hard today. With everything that's happened, everything you've done, if you don't get some rest, you won't be in any shape to figure anything out tomorrow."

"She's right," Dean agreed with Jessi as Ella hesitated.

"What if I have dreams, what if I can't wake up?"

When she looked at them, Dean could see the shade of the terrified girl she'd been seven years before, his heart tightened.

"I'll sleep with you tonight," Jessi promised. "I need a drink and I need some time to wind down, but Dean and I will be just in the living room until then. Dean you can skip the couch and take my room but you stay the hell out of my stuff or I'll break your nose."

"The scariest place I can think of is in your stuff Jessi and I've been some scary places."

"Dean's staying?" Ella asked, distracting them both, she sounded so hopeful and so comforted by the thought it put any further arguments out of both of their head.

"I'll be here." he promised.

"Okay," Ella agreed with some reluctance as she popped the pill in her mouth and washed it down. Jessi grabbed the TV remote from Ella's nightstand and turned it on. Flipping through the channels she settled on Bewitched, thankful they were running a marathon.

"Bewitched always made you laugh," Jessi said with a smile as she propped up Ella's pillows. "I know it's hard for you, but try to shut your mind off for a little while until the medicine kicks in. Watch TV, focus on Samantha and Darrin instead of everything else going on."

Ella scooted back, Jessi pushed Dean off the bed and tugged Ella's blankets back for her. Wearily Ella laid back, letting Jessi pull the covers over her.


	17. Chapter 17

"Crack the window?" Ella requested, her eyes pleading, she'd always hated to be completely shut in, without the air moving through the room.

"She needs the fresh air," Jessi told him as Dean looked questioningly at her.

"I remember, but is it safe?"

"It will be," Jessi replied. He reluctantly unlocked the window, cracking it enough to let a little of the cold night air in. Ella watched, her eyes already heavy as Jessi moved to the floor in front of the window.

" _Ur_ ," she said quietly, but firmly. Dean watched as a blue light swirled in a circle highlighting the sigils that until that moment had been invisible. It spun around a couple times, lighting more sigils as it passed them and then shot around the room, lighting similar sigils before finally shooting through the wall.

"Come here Dean."

"What's that?" He asked as he knelt down as she directed. Taking his hand, she took out her knife pricking his finger with it. Quickly she squeezed letting the blood well up before she twisted his hand letting the blood drip into the circle.

" _Zakar_ ," she whispered, the light flared as it soaked up the drops of his blood making it disappear altogether. "I activated the warding, _Ur_ means awake in ancient Hebrew. I keyed your blood into the wards allowing you to cross them, _Zakar_ , means remember." Jessi told him gesturing him to follow her, she left the lamp on Ella's desk on, knowing the light from the TV wouldn't be enough. They left Ella curled up. Her eyes already blinking sleepily as she focused on the TV. Jessi left the door cracked.

"Nothing can get into the apartment, or out for that matter without us knowing." Jessi continued to explain as they walked down the hall to the living room. "I'll set up the rest of the wards when you get back, I figured you might want to move your car and get a few things. Once I set the final wards we won't be leaving until Ella or I take them down in the morning. Jem arranged a spot for you to park the Impala in the parking garage across the street, it'll be safe and out of sight when my grandmother gets into town."

"Sounds good," Dean replied, "I'll be back up in a few."

"Dean?" Jessi said as she knelt to light the fireplace. He paused, his hand on the doorknob.

"Be careful out there, I have a feeling we're being watched, and not by anything good."

"Noted." He responded before he headed out with a determined set to his jaw.

Jessi watched him walk out the door, the lights of the warding flaring as he crossed them. As he shut the door, she used the small bit of magic she possessed to light the fire. She just didn't have the energy to go through the steps of lighting it naturally. She watched the logs ignite and once she was certain the fire wasn't going to go out or burn out of control she turned wearily for her room.

She glanced around the mess that was her space realizing she'd left her underwear drawer open when she'd removed her gun. She shut the drawer and headed into the closet kicking off her boots and slipping out of her short jean skirt and the low cut long sleeved t-shirt she'd worn to work. She removed her gun and unloaded it before setting it aside to take into Ella's room. She pulled the remaining pins out of her hair before she pulled out the sweats she'd been longing for since she'd left the Temple. Jessi pulled them on as she grabbed another long sleeved shirt and a heavy front zip hoodie. She slid heavy socks over her feet and grabbed an extra blanket knowing it would be too cold in Ella's room for her with that window cracked.

Carrying the blanket into Ella's room Jessi found her cousin thankfully asleep. Her face was as pale as the white pillow case her head rested on. Ella looked so frail it made Jessi's heart ache painfully. The shear strength of will that had managed to carry Ella through the trying day and into the even more difficult trials of that night had dissipated with sleep.

How in the hell she'd managed to get through everything the way she had, Jessi didn't know, but it was that strength that told her that whatever they were dealing with Ella was more than capable of handling it.

The sound of the door opening and the tread of Dean's boots on the wooden floors alerted her to his return. She left the blanket and her gun and slipped out into the hall hoping the show and the light would keep Ella from the dreams that had haunted her.

Dean dropped his bag near the one she'd abandoned earlier. She briefly considered taking it back to her room and discarded the thought just as quickly. Instead she picked up the whiskey she'd left on the table. She took a drink before she collapsed gratefully in the wing backed chair wrapping the throw around her.

More than likely she'd regret lighting the fire, especially since she didn't expect to be up much longer, but it had been worth it. The warmth was already moving through her limbs and helping to relieve the tension. She prayed that the creatures slinking around outside would leave them be for the night.

"Both of us have been reassuring her, but how worried should we be about this Jessi?" Dean demanded, exhaustion seeping through his voice as he fell into the couch and reached for his own whiskey.

"I don't know." Jessi answered him honestly, staring into the amber of her glass. She lifted her gaze to meet his questioning one. "I truly don't believe that Ella will go dark. I don't even think she can, Dean. A power like that, it's beyond dangerous. Having used it at all would normally leave traces of darkness moving through someone's body. There isn't any more darkness in her now, after having used the power than there was this morning."

"What exactly do you mean by more?"

"Ever since she was scratched when we were kids, some of the poison has remained in her blood. The darkness from it moves through her body, her blood, her mind. I was charged with monitoring it by Jem. With my gifts, I can immediately sense any shift in it. It's never changed, not the slightest. If it were possible for her to go dark, controlling a demon without a proper trap should have changed it, changed her."

"Could she mask it?"

"Fair question, but no. Not from me. She isn't experienced enough to understand that ability or how to use it. Before her gifts were locked tight by Nana, it's something she could have had the ability to do. She's never been trained to utilize those gifts though. Not since we were fourteen."

"She's never been trained to control a demon either though, Jessi, and she did."

Jessi fell silent studying the whiskey again. That had occurred to her as well. As had the fact that there wasn't a shift in Ella's ability to access the gifts that had been tightly locked by Nana.

Those gifts were still as dormant as they had been since Nana had performed the spell. Controlling that demon, had it been a part of her born gifts should have blown open the rest of her gifts, or at least Jessi thought so. The reality was that her understanding of that was extremely limited. She needed Jem and at the same time, the more she thought about it the more terrified of involving him she became.

"I know, Dean. I just don't know what it all means. I stand by my belief that Ella cannot go dark. I think it would take something beyond traumatizing to turn her like that, something that I just don't think could ever happen."

"Example?"

"Killing me."

"Jesus, Jessi." Dean muttered.

"You asked." She replied with a shrug before throwing back the rest of the liquid in her glass and sitting up to refill it, "Which is the reason I just don't believe it could happen. There are people out there, people like you and I Dean who could much more easily be turned than her."

"Never." Dean hissed angrily finishing what was left in his own glass.

"What if someone killed Sammy? What wouldn't you do to get him back or exact revenge?"

Dean met her gaze, his eyes had gone smoky, dangerous. He handed her his now empty glass and she refilled it without question and handed it back to him. He took a hefty swallow of the liquid.

"Point taken." Was his only response.

"Look at tonight Dean, both you and I would've taken out the demon, no questions asked, we would've considered the death of one preferable to the many more that would die at its hands. We wouldn't have liked it, but we wouldn't have balked at the option. I don't even have to ask you what happened, we both know for Ella it was the absolute last resort. She would've put herself in danger to save any innocent. Grandda was right, the light in her is too strong."

"What is Jem going to do when he finds this out?"

"Now that's an excellent question." Jessi responded downing her newly refilled glass in seconds.

The distant sound of a phone ringing pulled her from the dark well of blessedly dreamless slumber slowly into consciousness. It stopped for a moment the she almost fell back into the darkness, but that insistent chiming sound of her phone's ring began again. Her eyes were too heavy to open, instead her hand automatically reached in the general vicinity of the sound that she was wincing against.

By the time she'd located the phone, it'd thankfully stopped again. Blearily she shoved it under her pillow unable to bother with finding the nightstand again as she breathed a sigh of relief that it had stopped making noise.

Seconds later it started making noise again. She grumbled incoherently and silenced it with a nearly feral growl. By the time she managed to pry her eyes open enough to answer it she was ready to kill whoever had been stupid enough to keep calling.

"What?" She snarled into it, the medication from the night before must still be effecting her, she just couldn't manage to wake up.

"Eleanor Delphine Jameson, you had better have an explanation for what occurred last night."

That did it, her eyes snapped open and she only just managed to curb the urge to scream. What time was it? Pulling back her phone she blinked at it, until she could finally focus on the numbers to realize it was nearly seven forty-five. Groaning and burying her head back into her pillow for a moment, Ella cursed visciously.

Jessi had forgotten to set the alarm so that Ella could get into Jem's library. How did she prove she wasn't the root of all evil without the time to gather any proof to the contrary? The medication had left her befuddled and she felt as if she'd been flattened by a train. She had only one defense left, to pretend ignorance and to stick to it.

"Good morning to you too, Uncle Jem," She answered dryly as she rubbed at her gritty eyes, trying to unstick some of the lashes, never mind getting her eyes to focus yet.

She shifted to ease her aching muscles and there was very little she could do about the dull pounding at the base of her neck. If she didn't know better she would've sworn she was hungover.

It wasn't fair she internally whined, if she was going to have a hangover she preferred that it be justly deserved, with the chance to fully revel in her drunk, which certainly hadn't been the case last night.

"No, it isn't a good morning when I'm getting questions from our local officers regarding a strange ritual scene in the recently shut down nightclub a few blocks from here."

"What?" Ella demanded, as she patted the bed trying to find her cousin. Hadn't Jessi said she was going to sleep with her the night before? Things were a little fuzzy once they'd gotten back to the apartment, she'd been too busy freaking out. "There was a ritual at the Temple? Things have really gone downhill for that place, anyone hurt? Do we need to look into it?"

The lie rolled off her tongue smoothly, she hated herself for it, the last person in the world she wanted to lie to was Jem.

"Oh save it, Ella. I know every hunter and guardian in this city. Everyone is accounted for, everyone except your little trio down currently right down the hall." Jem bit out, not even bothering to play along and give them the benefit of the doubt. "I know very well Dean doesn't know how to deal with a demon, not on this level. That leaves Jessi, and she wouldn't have bothered to exercise it unless you somehow got involved. So what did you do?"

"I don't know what you're talking about Uncle Jem," Ella replied stonily as her patting turning to a frantic whacking, she grinned evilly in satisfaction as she finally heard a resounding oomph.

"If you don't want me to call a conclave you better start talking Ella, I know it had to have been you," Jem snapped. "Jessi would have just shot the damn thing and been done with it. It's why the plan was always to keep you together, to balance each other."

"Interesting Uncle Jem, the faith you have in Jessi an I is astounding." Ella returned with blatant sarcasm, "If you are so sure Jessi was involved why didn't you wake her up instead of me?"

"She wouldn't have answered the phone."

"Touché." Ella couldn't really argue with that. She slammed her hand down on her cousin again.

"Ow!" Jessi yelled shooting up from the bed and glaring at Ella angrily, "What's wrong with you?"

Ella pointed to the phone and mouthed her Uncle's name. Jessi's eyes went wide before she collapsed back on the bed muttering.

"I expect the three of you in my office in fifteen minutes or I'll come to you and you really don't want me to come to you, do you understood?"

"Look, Uncle Jem..." Ella began attempting to buy them some time but was rudely cut off.

"Fifteen minutes, Ella."

The line went dead. Ella looked at her phone seriously tempted to throw it against the wall, but that would just result in her having to buy another one.

"Damn it, Jessi!" Ella said sharply as she instead swung her legs over the bed to start getting ready.

"Don't yell at me." Jessi growled sitting up and stretching, "For once this isn't my fault."

"We had a plan, I was supposed to get up and research _before_ Uncle Jem called us. You didn't bother to set an alarm."

"Oh well, yeah, that is my fault." Jessi agreed climbing to her feet slowly, "You needed the rest though, I'm betting you feel hungover as is."

"Not the point."

"It is the point. You pushed yourself dangerously too far with the trip down memory lane and the power you used last night. You wouldn't have been any use to us without some rest."

"We might just get some extra rest Jessi, the eternal kind. This isn't a game." Ella returned her voice rising as the panic climbed its way up to throttle her, leaving her gasping for air.

"Ella calm down."

"Calm down?" Ella gasped, "You want me to calm down? What in the hell am I supposed to tell Jem? There's half a chance that with this power the family would hunt me. Do you understand that? If I don't have any answers for Jem, he might put the bullet in me himself. "

"I won't let that happen," Jessi told her, her eyes going cold, her tone firm, she walked around the bed and grabbed Ella and shaking her.

"And how are you going to stop it?" Ella demanded blinking back tears as Jessi wrapped her arms around her. "If the family tries, what can you do? You're one person and if you think they won't take you out to get to me then you're going to be very surprised."

"Jem won't let that happen, he'll help us Ella, you have to trust me, trust Uncle Jem." Jessi replied pulling back and looking into her eyes.

"And if he doesn't?"

"Then Dean and I will do whatever we have to in order to get you out and we'll go off the grid, but I don't think it's going to come to that."

"I guess we'll see won't we?" Ella said with a sigh. "I hope to God you're right Jessi. Either way you need to get dressed now. Jem said if we weren't in his office in fifteen then he's coming up and as our landlord he has a key."

Jessi's eyes went wide and she scrambled out of the room and down the hall to hers. Ella heard a loud smack followed by a grunt, despite the fear that was wrapping painful bands around her head she chuckled.

"What in the hell is wrong with you, Jessi?" She heard Dean's voice, husky from sleep, she tried to ignore how her heart picked up at the sound. "You're lucky I didn't shoot first and ask questions later."

"Yeah, yeah tough guy, get up. If we're not in my Uncle's office in fifteen, he's coming up here. Now, do you want to explain to him why you're in my bed?" Jessi asked him rushing into her closet for clothes, fighting to focus on the now instead of what could be, otherwise she might start panicking like her cousin had.

"Shit," Jessi heard Dean groan followed by mutters that sounded decidedly disgusted, she might've been insulted if hadn't exactly echoed her own feelings.

Grabbing a pair of jeans and shirt from her shelves, she dug through the mountain of laundry that spilled out from her hamper and onto the floor. Damn she needed to do laundry, she despised doing laundry, it was a never ending pain in her ass.

"You changing in here or the bathroom?" Jessi demanded as she came back into the room raising an eyebrow as she watched Dean slide his jeans over his boxers. "I guess I should be grateful you don't sleep in the nude, hmm?"

"Shut up, Jessi." Dean grumbled at her grabbing the rest of his clothes and ambling out of the room with his jeans still unbuttoned.

"Oh and Dean, just in case, we should probably go in armed," she said quietly all humor fleeing. The muscles in his back tighten before he paused looking back over his shoulder at her.

"Trouble?"

"Maybe, I'm pretty sure Jem will help us, but if he doesn't then there's a good chance the family will hunt Ella down."

"Your family would hunt one of their own?"

"Not everyone is going to want to risk the chance that there's isn't something wrong with Ella," Jessi sighed. "I don't like it any more than you do, but we're both a little more invested in Ella than they are. Blood doesn't trump evil. Think of it this way, if it weren't Ella, what would you do?"

"When you put it that way." he said knowing he couldn't argue. If he hadn't known Ella, or seen it for himself, then he'd probably have had serious doubts too.

"Besides, Uncle Jem has to look beyond a single member of the family to the good of all of them," Jessi warned him. "It's his job to keep as many of us alive as possible, if he thought Ella was going dark it would be a dangerous prospect. No matter what happens we need to go in prepared for anything."

Dean just nodded before he turned to continue down the hall colliding with Ella unexpectedly.

"Oh, I'm sorry Dean." Ella stammered, as she stumbled back using his bare chest to catch herself. His hands grabbed her waist to steady her as she jerked her hands off him further unbalancing herself.

"You okay?" he asked raising his eyebrows, her cheeks flamed red as she backed herself into the bathroom mumbling incoherently.

Slamming the bathroom door Ella leaned back taking a deep breath. She closed her eyes and focused on calming her racing heart. She could still feel the heat of his skin under her palms. Shaking her head, she moved to the sink and splashed cold water on her face, she needed to get ahold of herself, the last thing any of them needed was Jem in their apartment, and a chance of escape blocked.

Once she was dressed, Ella turned for her closet, if they had to leave in a hurry there were a few things she'd need and she wasn't about to go in unarmed expecting Dean and Jessi alone to get them out. She took down the box holding her 9MM Sig Sauer P226 from the standing jewelry box in her closet and loaded it. Snapping the magazine back in place she racked a bullet into the chamber flicked the safety before slipping it into its holster and sliding it on her belt.

There was only one thing left she couldn't leave behind in the apartment if it became necessary. Moving aside her sweatshirts and sweaters at the back of her closet she took down the box she'd hidden there. Ella took down the small dogwood chest, running her hands lightly over the letter B inlayed in rowan.

It'd been passed from generation to generation through her mother's line for more than two centuries. Age and travel had darkened the originally light wood. It'd been made to last and had been cared for to ensure it. The sides of it were smooth, no line to show where the opening was, because there wasn't any.

The only way to open it was through blood, the blood of Beauchamp, only then would the wood split and the box open. There were only two people left in the world that could open the box, Ella and Jessi, their mother's had been the very last of their line.

Aunt Ellen had brought it to her with the news that her mother had died as she'd lived, as a warrior in the field. There'd been a letter with the box, one that had expressed Delphine's disappointment in her child and the wish that the box go to Jessi.

No matter what her mother had wanted Ella hadn't been able to honor that last wish. One of her first memories of her mother was of the box, of being told how one day it would come to her, one day she'd carry on the family legacy. Ella had hidden the box, taking it with her, never able to part with it, even though practically Jessi would get more use out of its contents than she would.

She'd shared everything she'd ever had with Jessi, but this one thing she couldn't, this one thing was hers and hers alone. That moment of selfishness and stupidity had put them in this mess, she bit her lip and looked up at the ceiling.

Jessi hadn't needed to go to Jem for a demon killing blade, her mother's blade was in the box. Even if Jessi had known about the box, the blade had been thought to be lost with Delphine, but Ella knew better.

She hadn't been able to keep from opening it just after Delphine's death to take stock of what was inside, to touch probably the last things her mother had ever touched. Her very salvation had been in the box the whole time.

Her mother's dagger had a carved handle made from Griffin, a creature that was long extinct, but once bone upon a time they'd been capable of protecting against evil and witchcraft. Their bones were all that were left of them, but their power still resided in their remains.

The blade was iron, the edges and tip had been dipped in silver. Iron was poisonous to the Fae and if put in physical contact with a Fae blooded witch could dampen their powers if not render them useless. The silver was harmful to a potpourri evil beasties. Combined with the runes carved into the both the blade and the handle it had the capability of killing nearly any demon.

Taking the box with her, she met Jessi in the hall coming out of her room, her own gun and her knife on her belt. Jessi pulled on a flannel shirt to conceal them as she glanced down at what Ella was carrying, it took only a moment to register what it was.

"Is that what I think it is?" Jessi asked looking from the box to Ella and back again.

"Yes," Ella replied quietly. "It can't be left here and more importantly, it's at least a start on what we'll need on the road and on the run. I'll carry it down to the private entrance, the door's locked, but we can take that direction out if we need to."

Jessi nodded, she often forgot there even was a private entrance, they used the pub entrance for convince and out of habit. They met Dean in the living room where he waited, leather jacket on, army duffle over his shoulder. Jessi grabbed the go bag she'd left the night before and they filed out of the apartment.

"What's that?" Dean asked gestured to the box curiously.

"It was my mother's, a Guardian tool box of sorts," Ella replied. "We might need it if we have to run and there is no way I'm letting the Jameson's have it."

"Not that they could open it and she's right it'd be useful," Jessi added. "Besides it would be a shame for it to be locked away in a Jameson vault with all the other things that can't be used, but are too valuable to get rid of."

"I'll carry it down to the bottom of the stairs at the end of the hall, there's a private entrance we rarely use with a staircase from the street up to here. Jem had it put in just in case he ever needed to rent to a civilian. Give me your bags and I'll leave them with it. If we have to run, we'll take that direction out."

Nodding Dean handed over his bag as Jessi did the same. Ella left the two of them in the hallway as she carried everything downstairs and left it piled against the wall at the bottom. When she reached the top again she found Jessi waiting, Ella's leather jacket in one hand and hers in the other.

"Let's go," Jessi said quietly, they all looked at each other for a moment, the feeling they were about to walk into a firing squad clearly written on their faces and in every line of their body.

"Dean you don't have to get involved in this," Ella said turning to him and placing a hand on his arm. "If you walk away now, my family will let you go. You didn't know and you won't be held responsible for anything that happened. I'm not going to ask you to put your life on the line for this."

"I'm not going anywhere," Dean told her, taking her hand twining his fingers through hers, giving her a reassuring squeeze before letting it go. "I can't trust that Jessi won't need back up."

Jessi just snorted as they filed down the hall to Jem's office. Ella wanted to argue with him, but from the set of his jaw and the look in his eyes she knew it would be useless.

Technically he had a choice, but Dean knew neither of them could put bullet in their Uncle in cold blood. They respected and loved the man too much, they'd hesitate and he couldn't be sure that Jem would. If he wasn't there and Jem decided Ella was dangerous, the most likely scenario would be that Ella died and Jessi killed Jem out of reflex and in revenge.

For Dean it wasn't so much of a problem. He'd hate to kill a good man, but if it came down to Jessi and Ella walking back out of that office or one of them dying he'd do it in a heartbeat and he wouldn't regret the same way they would.


	18. Chapter 18

_A/N: After a huddle between the two of us we realized we have to much going on to throw in the hunt with Jem. Especially where we want it to go. So, sorry for the rewrite, but we promise it will be worth it. Thank you for keeping with us! - Raeghann_

Jem looked up from pacing as they trudged into his office, none of them any happier to be there than he was to have them.

"So, which one of you is going tell me exactly what happened last night and why I'm covering up an exorcism?" he demanded without preamble. "Shut the damn door behind you, the last thing we need is anyone over hearing this conversation."

Dean did as he asked while Ella and Jessi moved further into the room, his eyes stayed on Jem, ready just in case.

"We don't exorcise demons, we kill them. We don't give them the opportunity to come back. You," he pointed at Jessi, "And even more importantly you," his eyes shifted to Ella. "know that."

They all exchanged looks for a moment before Ella squared her shoulders and stepped forward bringing Jem's focus to her.

"I didn't know what else to do," she said quietly, almost penitently. "It was my decision to exorcise the demon because there were extenuating circumstances that made me reluctant to call you."

"Well I'm all ears as to what those circumstances could possibly be, you of all people know that we don't give demon's a second shot at us or any other innocent. If this demon crawls back out of hell how many people's lives will be ruined by it? How many will be tortured, how many will die? That blood is on your hands now Ella."

Jem leaned against his desk, the disappointment in his eyes combining with the disappointment and anger warring with each other in his voice had Ella closing her eyes and trying to gather her wits, to steady herself. She hated disappointing her family but of all of them she hated disappointing Jem the most.

"I expect this from Jessi, she's impetuous and doesn't always play by the rules or think things through, but not from you Ella, not from you. What the hell were you thinking?"

"Uncle Jem..."Jessi stepped forward in an attempt to shield Ella, the look her Uncle shot her stopped her instantly, she suddenly felt as if they were ten again but unlike then there was nothing she could really do or say. It had been an immediate instinct but she couldn't fight this battle for Ella.

"That I was scared," Ella snapped in exhausted frustration bringing her Uncle's eyes back to her. Jem just leaned against the front of his desk, crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow. He looked like he was ready to throttle them all.

Regaining control Ella returned his gaze coolly and calmly as she crossed to the chair in front of his desk and took a seat, crossing her legs at the ankle and folding her hands in her lap. Jessi took Ella's cue and sat to her right while Dean hovered just over Ella's left shoulder.

"Just listen Uncle Jem, please. I need you to just listen and let me explain everything before you say anything else or come to any conclusions." Ella's voice held a desperate edge that had Jem gesturing for her to continue as he waited irritably.

"Dean and I were leaving Walt's and on our way back we came across a demon attack." Ella went through the events of the evening in a play by play. Unlike when he had drilled Jessi about Dean the day before, Ella was extremely precise with her retelling. She left nothing out, no matter how damning.

Jessi waited, her eyes on Jem, ready for the worst and hating every moment of it. She spared a glance for Dean who met her eyes for a brief moment before looking back to Jem, his hand twitching was the only sign he was doing the same.

The room fell silent when Ella finished, so quiet the sound of their very breathing seemed unbelievably loud. Perhaps it was because of the possibility that for one or more of them it could be their last breaths. Ella's body continued to tense as the silence continued, seeming never ending.

Jem just stared at her for a moment his face expressionless, even his eyes were devoid of emotion.

"Uncle Jem?" Ella's voice was hesitant and nervous as she looked up at him, trying desperately to gage his emotions and failing. His hand twitched on his thigh as he glanced at his desk but he made no actual move for the gun that lay on the polished wooden surface as he looked at each of them in turn.

Ella glanced at Jessi for reassurance, but she couldn't offer more than a slight shrug in response. They had her uncle at a disadvantage, one that Ella knew Jessi and Dean wouldn't hesitate to exploit.

Ella realized that there was a deceptive ease to the way Jessi sat leaning back in the chair. Her foot propped up on the front of the desk with her finger's drumming against the arm of the chair and her head cocked as she watched their uncle.

All Jessi would need was to push back from Jem's desk to get a clear shot, her fingers tapped against the chair only inches from her gun.

Still, Ella could find a small comfort in the fact that Jessi remained still except for the fingers drumming out a tattoo on the chair. Dean was equally as still, it was like a showdown at high noon, everyone tense waiting for even the slightest flicker of movement to draw their gun.

"Uncle Jem?" Ella asked again, she felt Dean's hand on her shoulder, squeezing comfortingly before he rested it there, glancing up she found his eyes were locked for a moment on Jem's.

"I'm thinking, Ella." Jem told her irritably before breaking the staring match with Dean to zero in on Jessi. "What do you feel Jessi, is there any change in Ella, is there any darkness in her after her use of this new power?"

"No," Jessi told him confidently. "There's been no change in her. I think if the power was dark it would've increased what she already has in her, or at the very least left traces. I've looked but I can't feel anything different."

"Do you think if she continues to use this gift, it'd have the capability of turning her dark?"

"Honestly I don't know," Jessi replied. "I'd say that since it hasn't changed her with its first use it's likely it won't but I can't say with repeated use that it won't be an issue. It's something we'd have to keep an eye on."

Jem studied her for a moment trying to determine how much of what she said was the absolute truth and how much Jessi was stretching it to protect Ella. After a moment he nodded before circling his desk to take his own chair as he rifled through one of the drawers of his desk.

The soft sounds of well-oiled gears moving had them glancing at each other as Jem's concentration stayed on his desk while he pushed at one of his desk drawers. After a moment a compartment popped open, Jem pulled a very old key out of it and laid it on his desk. Ella sat up straighter in her chair as she recognized the key and knew immediately what it was. Catching Jessi's gaze over Ella's head Dean cocked an eyebrow, she slanted her gaze to Jem in response.

"I unlocked the wards for you already Ella, take the key, get what you need from my library and bring them back to the apartment. I'll bury your misadventures at the club this time, but you need to understand this is a one-time pass. Anything like this happens without me knowing and you'll both be Outcast faster than you can say the word."

"Yes sir," The girls said together.

"And you," Jem pointed at Dean, "I don't know exactly when my mother is choosing to drop in on us, but you need to stay off her radar. The hunt is bearing down on us."

"Yes sir," Dean said, there was something about his tone that was frighteningly reminiscent of his father's, it had him instantly responding in kind.

"Ella, your Spring Break starts in a couple days, it's the perfect time to send Jessi out," Jem told the girls. "Your school work is equally as important as your training, however, we both know you won't be able to focus on school right now. You'll be too worried about Jessi's safety and getting through this hunt the way I know you can."

"Will I be getting the information for the hunt prior?"

"As much as I can give you, but you need to be prepared for anything. I'm not going to set you up to fail by giving you a hunt you don't have the experience for. However, it won't be a quick salt and burn either. Keep training with Dean and Jessi."

Ella nodded, glancing at Jessi and Dean meeting each of their eyes for a moment before she turned back to Jem.

"Before I forget, Walt's oldest is having issues with a house he bought.," Ella told him, Jem cocked his head curiously as she rattled off the address. "They had simple issues, but it's escalating, if I remember correctly there was a double homicide a few years ago, it could be the issue."

"We cleared that house Ella, I wouldn't have let it go back on the market after what happened without taking care of it. It has to be something else," Jem replied.

"Something the construction woke up?" Ella asked, plucking a pen from the holder on his desk and picking up a pad of note paper.

"Figure it out for me, it'll be good practice." Jem responded firmly leaning back in his chair, "When you and Jessi pass this upcoming test, more than likely you'll be taking on more than one hunt and Guardian at a time. So it's going to be a trial by fire. Between this hunt and Jessi's, if at any time I feel like you can't handle it, I'm pulling the plug."

"I'll handle it." Ella promised. "I'll start running the history of the house."

"Dean, I want you with Ella. She's going to be vulnerable since word of this has more than likely gotten out among the demons, it's more than likely the info is already topside. I don't know who else will get the memo so to speak. We knew she'd need protection sooner or later, it appears it's going to be sooner.

"It was already my plan."

"I'll head over to your library then. It'll probably be better if I just take the next couple days off. I'll call my professors and tell them I have a family emergency. I have a couple of classmates I can tap for notes."

"Alright," Jem agreed. "Get to it."

Ella couldn't stop the sigh of relief as she levered herself out of the chair. Dean followed close behind as she headed out into the hallway not even realizing Jessi had hung back.

"What's going on in that head of yours Uncle Jem?" Jessi asked her arms crossing and her gaze narrowing. "Ella's too relieved you didn't punish her for last night, to have seen through this but I saw that calculating look in your eye, so what's really going on?"

"Until now it's never been the plan to allow Ella into the field," Jem sighed, leaning back in his chair his eyes remaining steadily on Jessi's. "As long as you're in her life there's no way she can completely walk away from hunting, but becoming a Historian was the perfect solution. This power that's suddenly surfaced is a solid beginning, a way I can prove what I've thought all along."

"And what exactly is that Uncle Jem?" Jessi questioned suspiciously.

"That Ella was never supposed to be banned from the field, everything Ma is worried about, everything she's convinced the rest of the family to be worried about, is wrong."

Jessi could only stare at him. While she'd always wanted and believed that Ella should be allowed full capacity as her partner, she'd never realized Jem had also. Frankly she'd thought she was firmly on that little island all alone.

"What do you mean?" Jessi asked quietly, terrified to hope someone else was on her side. "We both know I've always thought that Ella should be a full Guardian. You've never once given any indication that you've ever believed that."

"There was some good logic behind what Ma said at the last conclave, Jessi. No one wanted to risk your lives. However, when you were younger we all believed both of you had a destiny, that you were meant to hunt and kill a specific evil that our ancestor Eleanor Jameson died to bind. You know full well that eventually a binding is either weakened or stupidly broken, the only absolute is to kill the creature, but the abilities necessary to do that hasn't been available in the generations following Eleanor. Ma believed this more strongly than anyone back then. Unfortunately Rico was too worried about what the price for killing Maria would be, specifically what would be required of Ella.

Jessi could only sit as Jem spoke while she tried to take in the information that had been danced around for most of her life and that Jem was finally telling her.

"That day at the farm when Ella was injured, Rico was trying to stop your destiny. He was attempting to do what we believed was meant for the two of you and in his attempt he let the genie out of the bottle so to speak. He tampered with something he shouldn't have causing his own death, followed by the attack on Ella. Da called me in after Rico died, his choice for the next head of the family had always been me. Though I was young he wanted me at the farm in case his attempt at tightening the bindings Rico had loosened took his life as well. After Da's death it was a chain reaction, Maria took your Uncle Aidan and Aunt Delphine, a year later your Uncle Ryan was killed. Maria came close to taking Dominic too, but he got away by the skin of his teeth. Maria has systematically been killing off the family since Rico's death, since Rico opened a door none of us are capable of closing, save maybe the two of you. Sadly that may have been the only way to get to where we are now."

"I'm not sure I follow, Uncle Jem. How do you know they're even connected. I thought Aunt Delphine and Uncle Aidan died at a lake."

"A bloody handprint was on the surface of the mirror after Rico and your Uncle Ryan. On a tree for Delphine and Aidan. I think Rico did exactly what he was supposed to, I think that Ella's poisoning only strengthens her abilities. I think her having a piece of Maria is what is going to give her the ability to end Maria once and for all." Jem replied standing and beginning to pace. "Unfortunately the flip side of that coin is that there is a possibility of Ella turning because of that same poison. It can go either way. Ella could do everything she's supposed to and maintain the light in her, or she could go dark, but there's always a possibility of darkness winning. When free will was entered into the equation back in the beginning it left room for us to choose darkness over light. However, we both know there's a stronger light in Ella than most. Da told me before he left to go into the woods to complete the spell that the light in her was too strong to be killed by Maria's darkness. I think he knew Ma too well, he knew what Rico's death compounded by his own would do to her, but he couldn't step back from trying to close what Rico opened."

"Did what Grandda did even work? Did his death at least do something positive?"

"It's kept her from complete freedom, but it hasn't stopped her from picking us off Jessi. Ma might've convinced me that it wasn't you or Ella that was supposed to kill Maria, but Ella survived when no one else did, she beat back a darkness that no one had before. She's now exhibiting powers that have never been seen in someone that hasn't gone dark. What are the odds that that Ma's wrong Jessi?"

"Ten to one easily." Jessi whispered, her eyes going dark at the thought.

"Even more convincing is the way Ella handled herself, if Ma were right and she weren't meant for the field, if there was something that was going to send Ella over the edge in hunting she wouldn't have been able to take care of last night as well as she did. She was obviously inexperienced which is to be expected and her execution could use some refinement, of course. Still she thought on her feet quicker than I would've ever expected and she not only handled it, she handled it well. I'd be an idiot to continue to keep her out of the field with how she's already performed, not to mention this new power of hers. If it doesn't affect her negatively I'd be crazy not to utilize it."

"What are the chances that this power won't mess with her eventually?" Jessi said, her voice low and her eyes burning into her Uncle's. She knew she was retracing what they'd gone over a few minutes earlier, and while she hadn't lied to her Uncle, she had her concerns. She couldn't help but ask because while she'd given her opinion, Jem hadn't truly voiced what she so badly needed to hear.

He could read the fear for Ella in Jessi's eyes and the determination to do whatever was necessary to protect her, not that he'd have expected any less.

"I really don't know, Jessi." He answered in complete honesty pausing in his pacing at his desk. He met her eyes knowing he wasn't able to tell her what she wanted him to say. His hand tapped on his desk with his own nervous energy, the same way Jessi's had earlier. "It's possible it's a power that was misunderstood, which could've resulted in the Guardian's death or the bearer of this gift wasn't strong enough to handle it, and went insane. There's also the possibility that it was a gift that a Guardian never spoke of out of fear, choosing to hide it from everyone for the previous reasons. Lastly new powers do manifest from time to time. We still don't entirely understand why Guardians have the powers they do, or where they come from other than from the angel blood we have running through our veins. We know powers tend to be hereditary. Yours come from our tie to Romanus, the son of Aneas, who in turn was the son of Aphrodite the Greek Fae that was worshiped as the goddess of love and beauty. We both know she could feel people's emotions and create them in others. However some powers are introduced or brought out in a Guardian because they're needed."

"What if this power is going to turn her Jem, what if it's a byproduct of the poison that's still in her blood?"

"It's definitely possible the poison has something to do with it, that it's changed a power, a minor power Ella already had but can't access because Ma bound her powers. If it were going to turn her or wake that darkness, it should've happened last night. Neither of us sense any change in her and I don't believe that she could hide it from us if it did. I won't endanger Ella's life, or her soul. We'll monitor her when she uses the gift, if there's no change in her I intend to use it to our best advantage."

"I guess that's as good as we're going to get," Jessi sighed, the frustration clear in her voice, "You don't think she's going to find anything useful in the library, do you?"

"About her ability, she will, she won't like it, as I just told you no one else has had this power without being dark and insane. However, the research will calm her, and there are other things, things I think that will bring other pieces together for Ella. Pieces that will be very useful for the two of you, Jessi."

"I don't like any of this Uncle Jem. I have a terrible feeling that we are hurtling towards a future that is not what any of us want or expect. I just don't feel this is going to end well."

"What do you want me to do?" Jem asked her leaning forward and meeting his niece's eyes, "The Fates are fickle we both know it, but eventually they find a way. We have to look at the larger picture here, this is a war, and you know as well as I do that sometimes you sacrifice a battle to win the war."

"I just wish it weren't Ella we're sacrificing," Jessi muttered irritably.

"I love Ella just as much as you do little girl," Jem reminded her, his voice gruff. "Don't mistake me, but to a certain degree we are all being sacrificed for the greater good with every hunt we go out on. Now you're not keyed into the restricted area of my library, only Ella is. Dean will be there to protect her, there's no reason for both of you to go and wait around while Ella gets what she needs. I could use you in the bar today, Jude called in sick and I need you to take his shift."

"Damn it," Jessi growled. "Again? I'm exhausted."

"Sorry pumpkin," Jem replied spreading his hands in a helpless gesture. "I hate to ask you to pull a double…"

"No you don't," Jessi said with mild heat.

"I hate to ask because you've had a rough week, I don't feel sorry for you because you're tired. That was self-inflicted if you ask me."

"I didn't." Jessi called over her shoulder as she left Jem alone in the office heading for her apartment.

Since they only needed one person on protection detail, Jessi had every intention of curling back up in bed and catching a few more hours before her double shift started, assuming she would even be able to after that rather enlightening conversation. She finally had confirmation of pieces she'd always believed to be true but hadn't ever been able to get anyone to admit too.

"Are you coming?" Ella asked as Jessi walked through the front door.

Their gear had been brought up from the private entrance and lay in the living room, all except the Beauchamp box which Jessi assumed Ella had already put away. She made a mental note to ask Ella about it later as the oldest of the remaining Beauchamps it was Ella's by right, it wasn't something she intended to dispute, but her aunt had a few toys that could prove useful. It would be good to know what all had been left in the box when Delphine died.

"I'm not going to be much use to you," Jessi responded. "I'm not keyed into the wards, neither is Dean, and Jem's shorthanded in the bar today, again. I get to fill in the holes, as per usual. Since it's pointless for two of us to go and sit with our thumbs up our butts while you spend hours in your own personal little nirvana, Dean can protect you, I'm going to attempt to get some sleep."

"Brat," Dean grumbled, as Ella took her keys from the hook by the door and tucked them into her pocket. Jessi just smiled before she ambled down the hallway to her bedroom.

"Let's go," Ella told him opening the door and gesturing for him to go through. "Jessi lock the door."

The last was yelled and was followed by a muffled answer that was cut off as Ella shut the door behind her. They headed down the stairs heading through the still silent kitchen.

"Breakfast?" she asked him as they cut around the alley. "We could hit _Le Petite Coin Paradis_ and grab something before we go to Jem's.

"Sounds good to me."

They fell into step with each other as they walked to the parking garage, Jem had set up a spot for Dean's car.

"Hey Mickey," Ella called to the parking attendant, he offered her a cheery smile as they walked past. "Is the car Uncle Jem needed parking for in the usual spot?"

"Sure is," Mickey called back.

"Thanks," Ella told him. "Did you lose weight?"

"Fifteen."

"Wow, that's fantastic, you keep it up we can't afford for you to have another heart attack."

"Yes ma'am." Mickey gave her a mock salute as she breezed past him leaving Dean to scramble to catch up.

"Is there anyone in this town you don't know?"

"I make it a habit to maintain good relations with the local business owners and their employees. Even if they haven't dealt with anything supernatural, they might. Besides it's likely they've come into Jameson's. They're going to remember if I was rude or impolite at their job and might return the favor, or not come in at all."

Dean could only shrug, she had a good point.


	19. Chapter 19

_A/N: As an apology, we have another chapter ready... hope you enjoy it._

Dean got the door as they reached the door, Ella stepped through the door with a quick thanks. The small knowing smile didn't leave Madame's face as she quickly filled their orders. Ella chose not to respond; she didn't have the time waste convincing Madame of anything. More than anything she wasn't entirely certain that the coffee no matter how good was worth the confusion that the older lady's look had sparked. She couldn't be sure of where she stood with Dean what he wanted, what she wanted and with everything else going on she didn't any more time to agonize over it than she did to argue about it.

To distract herself Ella focused on calling her professors and classmates making arrangements to take the next few days off while she directed Dean to Jem's house at the same time. The neighborhoods of South Bend gave way to farm land near and around Chamberlain Lake and Nature Preserve. It was more sparsely populated, which was a necessity when you were training Guardian's.

Like Sylvie, Jem's talents were not necessarily in the field, while he did take an occasional hunt to keep himself sharp for training, he cherry picked the cases. When he wasn't hunting he made up for it by handling the family's finances, he had a clear precise mind for business. More than anything Jem had a talent for training, there were Houses in Europe fighting for a chance to have Jem work with their children.

Her Uncle's house stood on enough acreage to allow for a full outdoor obstacle course like Nana and Grandda had used at the farm. There was also a full indoor training facility and a sparring arena and still managed to leave room for Jem's archives which were massive. The house included a weapon's vault that housed the rare pieces that were only needed on occasion and stored to keep them from being stolen or falling into the wrong hands.

Ella directed Dean into a drive blocked by a high wall and gates of pure iron. The stone wall had iron reinforcements specially coated in salt inside and as with all the homes of the old Houses, it had protections upon protections.

It also was a necessity, she mused as she jumped out to key in the code to open the gate. As a training facility for the children of the Houses, it needed extra protection against the things that children hadn't the skill or capability of killing yet. The last thing the Guardians could afford was to let their already dwindling progeny die, or worse, be taken by and twisted by the very things they were training to eventually kill.

Dean whistled low as he pulled around the curved driveway to park in front of the old carriage house that had been converted into a free standing garage just behind the house.

"Did you think I was kidding when I told you that there might be Guardian accounts and vaults that belong to your family?" Ella asked tiling her head with a bemused smile at his amazement as he killed the engine "This house has been here for four generations, it's been added to, updated, or it's outer buildings converted as needed to house and train Guardians. There are some perks to being a Jameson, my family's been careful to be sure of it."

"Apparently," Dean replied dryly, shaking his head.

Ella opened the car door and stood, shutting it behind her, she heard Dean do the same as she followed the path between the garage and the kitchen door. She breathed a sigh of relief as she found it locked. Charlotte had more than likely gone to the store after dropping off the kids. If they were lucky, they'd get in and get out without her coming home. All around the fewer questions asked the better at this point.

Unlocking the door Ella led him through the kitchen and down the hall to the library, Dean let out another whistle as she opened the double doors leading into the cavernous room. She considered herself a bibliophile but her collection of books was a drop in the ocean compared to what Jem had inherited and added to over the years.

It was her favorite room in the house, reminding her of the library in Disney's Beauty and the Beast that she'd always coveted. Forget the prince, she just wanted the library. Two comfortable armchairs flanked the stone fireplace. Its mantel held polished candelabras that Ella knew had been in Charlotte's family for generations. The walls were ceiling to floor books, balconies and ladders were required to reach the higher shelves. The ceiling had been painted with murals of ancient Guardian's in their battles against evil, heroes that were thought to be mythic, but Ella knew had really existed.

One of her favorites had always been of Beowulf vanquishing the dragon that had been his own death. Beowulf had been an ancestor of the Jameson's according to their lore from a bastard child Beowulf had never recognized but they'd long prided themselves on the bravery and prowess of their ancestor. Near Beowulf stood Guinevere and Lancelot in a pose reminiscent of Edmund Leighton's painting titled God Speed, yet another of the Jameson ancestors. If Ella remembered correctly it came from the Percy line that had married into the Jameson family sometime around when Catherine Medici had been the Queen of France.

"How in the hell do you find anything?" Dean asked, pulling her attention back to the matter at hand. Ella couldn't help smiling as he craned his neck looking up at the uppermost bookcases.

"It's cataloged," Ella told him gesturing to the bank of library drawers set into the wall behind him. "Jem's been working on getting it cataloged electronically, but that's going to take a while. Luckily for us what I'm looking for is in a separate area, there's a small room just over here that holds the restricted books and various other restricted items."

"What kind of restricted items?"

He watched as she walked across the room to a wooden door, taking the key from her pocket, she unlocked it.

"Things the family has come across over the years, confiscated items that have been locked away because they're too dangerous," Ella replied, the doorway flashed a soft silvery green as she passed through. "There are curse boxes holding cursed items. There are grimoires and tools from dark witches. What we're looking for are journals of any of my ancestors that dealt with dark witchcraft, as well as any informational books on them."

"Don't try to follow me, the wards will more than likely kill you," Ella warned as she moved to a smaller cabinet like the one she'd pointed out a few moments before. She opened one flipping through the index cards, taking a notepad from the top of the cabinet she began writing down numbers.

"Aren't there kids in this house?"

"You aren't of Jameson blood," Ella said simply. "The wards would only knock one of us out and leave us feeling like hell for a few days after."

"Oh well, now I feel all better…" Dean trailed off, not needing to finish his statement, the sarcasm in his voice said the rest.

Ella looked up from the card she was reading to raise an eyebrow, her lips pursing, as she studied him, for a moment before refuting his words.

"When was the first time your dad gave you a gun Dean?"

Dean leaned against the long table that was generally used for formal family meetings and the occasional Conclave. He crossed his arms before answering.

"Probably seven or eight."

"That's an age most people would consider too young. You could've killed yourself, your brother or your father if you hadn't been taught the responsibility of what a gun could do, if you didn't treat it like the potentially dangerous tool that it is. The wards just suck for a couple days."

Ripping the paper from the notebook Ella carried it to the shelves.

"So that stops them from trying?"

"Lord no, they know it won't kill them. I think they'd respect it more if it did," Ella responded absently as she took down a book and began flipping through the pages, after a couple minutes she replaced it.

"That's comforting," Dean said dryly as Ella trailed her fingers across the bindings of the books until she found the next.

"Since it won't kill them there's always a few that see getting in here as a challenge. Jessi tried right off the first time we stayed here. We couldn't have been here more than five minutes, before she'd dragged me to the door, her exact words were, 'It's not like it'd kill me', right before it knocked her flat. She scared me half to death."

Ella picked out another book, this one she skimmed over for a moment before setting it on a table by the door.

"Figures," Dean chuckled.

"Doesn't it though?" Ella replied amusement coloring her voice as she shared a smile with Dean for a moment before she turned back to the books.

Dean boosted himself onto the table, Ella eyed him for a moment wondering if she should tell him to get down. Jem would have Dean's hide if he was caught on the table that had been in the family for over a century. As she watched him, Dean craned his neck trying to see the paintings on the ceiling, for a moment he came precariously close to falling off the table. Ella shrugged instead and turned back to the catalogue to track down the books she needed and left Dean to entertain himself.

Double checking her list Ella sighed thankfully, she was nearly done. She glanced at her watch, it was a good thing too she'd be pushing it if she took too much more time, it would be best if they left before Charlotte got home. If her aunt came home she'd deal with it, but she really didn't want to answer the questions that would be undoubtedly asked. All in all, it would be better to just let Jem deal with Charlotte.

Shaking her head, she reminded herself to pay attention, the last two books on her list were nearly illegible. Flipping back through the catalogue, her eyes were caught by a card. The Damiani Coven, studying the title it rang a bell. A hunt that Grandda had called a party in to help him with, Rico, Jem, and her Uncle Bill had all come to the farm for it. They'd taken Linden Brightmore, the Faeborne witch her family had worked with since before Ella had been born.

She couldn't have been older than twelve, the memory flickered for a moment before it cleared. She had been twelve, it had been the first time that the Winchester boys had come to the farm. Uncle Bill, her Aunt Ellen's husband had vouched for John suggesting him for another member of the hunting party. Grandda hadn't been sure of taking a hunter out on a Guardian job, but Bill had thought that he'd be an asset. It would also give his boys a chance at some more formal training than John could provide.

She had a sudden very clear memory of Dean and his younger brother Sam as their father had introduced them. Dean had been surly and cocky, but she'd sensed something under it, something that made her more patient with him, while it had egged Jessi into annoying him with as much regularity as she was able. Sam, she remembered, had been quiet, almost shy, but brilliant enough he'd given Ella run for her money in their lessons by the next year when John had brought the boys back to the farm.

Rubbing her forehead against the dull ache she continued to focus pushing past the memories she'd have liked to linger over and focused on the important piece.

The coven had killed the handlers of a couple hell hounds and turned them into their own private assassins. Every one of the men involved had returned beaten and bloody and unfortunately not entirely sure they'd succeeded.

However, they had managed to cut the head off the snake, taking, the highest level of the coven out, there were only a few members that had remained. Members Rico had been specifically tasked with finding, in fact he'd come in off the hunt just before he died, he believed he'd finished off the remaining members that had been at large, but something about the coven had gotten to him. Something that had become an obsession.

She noted a journal that had been cross referenced with it. Her eyes widened at the writing, she recognized the lazy scrawl. It was Rico's handwriting; it was hard to forget the writing of the man that had helped her learn to write as a child. Both Ella and Jessi had traced letters Rico had written for them before kindergarten. Over and over until Nana had taken over. She'd told Rico that she didn't want the girls to pick up his chicken scratch with a bemused smile.

Rico had cross referenced the book on the coven with another, a journal written by Donovan Jameson, next to it he'd written Hell Hounds. She quickly transferred the information onto a separate piece of paper. Any information on the thing that had poisoned her and ultimately made her unfit to hunt might be worth looking into.

"Hey Dean," she called as she stepped to the doorway, she found him still sitting on the table, swinging his legs, boredom had apparently completely set in. He was folding a piece of paper from the pad that had been left there, three paper planes lay on the floor in varying distances from him.

"Really?" she couldn't help asking as she cocked an eyebrow looking from the planes to Dean.

"What?" he returned innocently, she merely shook her head as she took one of the stacks of books she'd accumulated and carried it out to the table. As she set them down she handed him the piece of paper.

"I need Donovan Jameson's journal, think you can handle that?"

"Yeah sure," Dean said, jumping down from the table and taking the slip of paper she held out.

"And you better pick up the other planes, if Charlotte gets home before we head out she won't be amused, and when Charlotte isn't amused, Jem's downright pissy. "

"Yeah, yeah," she heard him mutter as she returned to the restricted area, taking down the book on the Damiani Coven and the last book on her list, to add to the remaining books she'd set aside.

"I think that's it," she said as she stacked the books and carried them out. She handed them off to Dean who carried a worn leather bound book in his hands before she carefully locked the door and returned the key to her pocket.

Resignedly Dean picked up the larger stack of books, leaving the rest for Ella.

"Thanks."

Ella gave him a sweet smile as they carried them into the kitchen where she tracked down a box to put them in, the older more fragile she wrapped in small towels before packing them. Dean hefted the box carrying it out to the car and setting them on the floor of the back seat as Ella slid into the passenger seat. She couldn't help the sigh of relief as the car rumbled to life and Dean headed back down the driveway, without seeing Charlotte. Whatever had held her up, Ella was more than grateful to it.

"I don't suppose we can wrangle Jessi into getting up and helping with the actual research?" Dean asked as he carried the box up to the apartment.

"She'll be downstairs already," Ella answered distractedly as she paged through one of the volumes she'd plucked from the box on their way in.

"Lucky her," Dean mumbled under his breath eyeing all the books Ella had chosen with complete disdain.

"So can you research?" Ella asked looking from the pile of books on the coffee table to Dean and back again.

"What kind of question is that?" He demanded irritably, "Can I research? Can you research?"

"I didn't mean it like that," Ella sighed with impatience. "I don't know exactly what your capacity is for reading anything other than English. I have books here in Italian, Latin, Greek, as well as English."

"I read a very little Latin and English," Dean told her.

"Okay, then try this one, let me know if you find anything of interest."

"Where are you going?"

"I need my journal and a couple of notebooks," Ella called over her shoulder. "I'll be back in a minute I promise the books won't bite."

"Not so sure about that," Dean grumbled. This was going to be long and painful, Dean hated research, he'd much prefer to be in the field kicking something's ass to slogging his way through books. Of all that was required of the job he hated research the most, no matter how necessary an evil it was.

After a few moments Ella returned with two spiral notebooks and a tobacco colored leather journal. Sitting across the coffee table from him she slid a pen and notebook across the table to him. Settling into a companionable silence as they each focused on the books. Ella's hand flew over her journal as she wrote furiously, though what she was actually taking notes on he couldn't be certain.

It was slow going for him. Most of the books were written more than three hundred years before and the handwriting was cramped and in some places illegible forcing the reader to connect the dots based on the information that was readable. The pages had to be handled with care as they'd been carefully preserved, but they were still delicate. His earlier thought that this was going to be long and painful had clearly been an under estimation.

"Do you want some coffee?" Dean asked rubbing his forehead against the dull ache that had started after an hour.

"No, thanks, I only drink one cup unless I want to be up all night." Ella said distractedly as she closed yet another book and reached for the next in the box coming up with the red leather journal she'd asked him to find. "But if you want some, there's coffee in the cabinet above the coffee maker, there's a sugar bowl next to the maker and cream in the fridge.

"Thanks," Dean replied watching as Ella's eyes flew over the pages, she'd set aside the journal in Greek after a half hour. She'd flipped through nearly six other old books before something had caught her eye. She was now completely focused on whatever it was she had found.

He stood pausing to roll his shoulders before stretching his neck and back, he'd always found that researching was always a pain in the neck, literally.

"Ella, you want a sandwich? I could throw together some food for us. We should probably eat," Dean called as he glanced in the fridge before he took down the coffee from the cabinet she'd directed him to and started a pot. He looked at the coffee wondering how she managed to get through studying and researching all the time on only one cup.

"What?" she asked, he stuck his head out of the kitchen doorway to find her looking up at him befuddled. There was a pen behind one ear another twisting her hair up into a messy bun and a third in her hand. She had been leaning forward as she took notes. She wore a lace edged tank under the deeply scooped neckline of the long sleeved Henley she'd thrown on that morning, but it just framed the view that she didn't even realize she was giving him.

She peered up at him from the book she'd been engrossed in, books surrounded her, all she needed was a pair of glasses to complete the sexy librarian look. He couldn't help imagining for a second what it would be like to walk across the room, pull the pen from her hair letting her long curls swirl around them both and kiss her. To shove the books off the coffee table and…

She was still looking at him waiting for an answer, he shook his head, as tempting an idea as it was, if he swept the books from that table Ella would probably have a conniption fit completely ruining the mood. All of them were more than likely irreplaceable and delicate. A good many of them were a direct family legacy. It was something honestly he could understand, after all his own father kept a journal of everything he hunted and kept profiles on each hunt for future reference. It was something that John always carried with him, one day it would be passed on to Dean, it wasn't a day he was looking forward to, but he had no doubts that the information in that book would be invaluable.

"Uh," he cleared his throat, for a moment he'd forgotten what he'd asked, his grumbling stomach thankfully reminded him. "You want a sandwich?"

"Sure," she replied as she returned to her book. "There are some chips in the pantry across from the fridge and some fruit in the bowl on the counter, help yourself to anything."

He could tell by her tone it was polite instinct. He recognized that tone, he'd heard it from Sammy often enough when he'd been juggling high school and hunting. The only reason Sam had eaten those last couple years before he'd left for college was because Dean had set the food down on the desk and ordered him to eat. He couldn't help wondering what she'd found that had her so captivated. From experience he knew she'd tell him eventually, for now he'd make some food and see where she was when he finished. He opened the fridge taking out the ingredients for the sandwiches. He was as thankful as he'd been the night before that the girl's taste ran to the good deli meats and cheeses.

No American cheese and bologna on Wonder Bread for them, thick slices of black forest ham, roast beef, and maple turkey with sharp white cheddar, gouda, and pepper jack, with a choice of Jewish Rye or Potato Bread to put it on. It had been months since he'd had food that he hadn't had to microwave at a convenience store, or hadn't been served in a hole in the wall greasy spoon diner. His mouth watered at the thought of the fresh ingredients that were available.

Once the sandwiches were made he took down plates figuring Ella would be picky about such things. He grabbed the chips and a couple of apples from the bowl because she'd suggested it rather than any real interest in them. Carrying them into the living room he set Ella's on the coffee table near her elbow as he sat on the floor the plate in his lap.

"Ella eat," he ordered as he picked up his sandwich.

"It wasn't a hell hound." Ella replied, looking up at him, slamming the book she'd been so focused on shut.

"Excuse me?" Dean's eyes flicked to hers instantly, a touch of wariness in them. The tone was one he recognized as very dangerous.

"It wasn't a hell hound attack."

"What wasn't a hell hound attack?" He asked lightly setting his plate on the table in front of him and leaning on his forearm, watching her carefully as she stood and turned her back on him. She didn't want to see the answer in his eyes.

"The journal I asked you to track down was written by a distant cousin of mine that at one-point hunted hell hounds exclusively, with the intention of eradicating them. While a noble intention, it got him killed young and obviously he didn't succeed, but he did take copious notes on hell hounds and their various attributes. According to him hell hounds like to play with their victims. Unlike any natural dog species, they don't go for a quick kill. Just like their demon masters they enjoy inflicting pain and will draw out a victim's death. If I'd come up against a hell hound on my own in the woods I wouldn't have survived it. They would've found nothing but pieces of me by the time they got there."

"Is there any way of running one off?" Dean asked, carefully leading her toward the answer he already knew. He understood the tone now. He was already feeling the bands tightening around his head as he fought the spell and the frustration at not being able to just tell her and be done with it.

"It would've taken a miracle for me to survive let alone with only these claw marks," she pulled the shoulder of her shirt down to show him the slivery lines of the scars he remembered very well, scars caused by a wound he'd been forced to help hold her down while they tried desperately to clean the poison from it.

"What if you had help?"

"A Hell Hound attacks at first like a canine going for their prey with their teeth, but then they tend to be more cat like. They tear at their victim with their claws generally going for the area that would allow for the slowest, most painful death. They particularly like going for the guts since it's rare even now to stop sepsis from a punctured intestine, it's a terrible way to die."

The fear of what had really attacked her was enough, but the idea of the attack she was describing made him a little nauseous. If it had been just a victim she was talking about it would've been disturbing enough, but after all these years he'd learned to tolerate the disturbing. The idea of what she was describing happening to her was enough to freeze the blood in his veins and yet it still didn't touch the terror he'd felt when she'd been hurt. It hadn't just been her body that was vulnerable to the poison that had seeped into her blood with the claw marks on her shoulder, it'd been her soul on the line.

Dean hadn't been able to stop himself from collecting any information that came his way on the thing that had attacked the Jameson house. He hadn't found much, but every bit of information, very limited though it'd been had been burned into his mind. Carlos had said that the poison could consume her soul, at the time he hadn't realized how small that l sliver of a hope that it wouldn't had been. He hadn't realized what a miracle it was that she'd survived.

"So what if they killed it before it could attack?" He couldn't help the question, the prodding to keep her questioning, looking for answers.

"See that's the thing, the usual protocol would be to call in anyone available for a hunting party, which is what Nana's always said happened. It was supposedly a hell hound that had gotten away from its handler. Hell hounds are rabid and feral creatures when they're being controlled; one that's out of control is a danger to everything. Good to bad and anything in between. What doesn't make sense is the story has always been that I came across it and was scratched, it was after the attack that a hunting party was assembled. We've already covered what would've happened to me if it had come across me."

"Unless there was someone with you."

"Were you there in the woods with me Dean?" she asked, he looked down, his throat constricting, but it was answer enough. "Did you run off a hell hound?"

He gave a slight shake of his head, his face turning red with his effort.

"Did we do it together?"

He rubbed his forehead and took a shallow breath before coughing against the tightness. Ella blinked back the tears at his discomfort, she wanted to stop, but she had to know. Her hands had dropped to the table gripping it, to keep herself from going to him.

"Was there anyone else?" she forced herself to say

He managed a slight nod of his head as he pushed the heel of his hand against his forehead as he fought against the pain to give her the answers she needed.

"Was I even attacked in the woods?"

Again the barest shake of his head, but he was blinking against the tears of pain. Unable to take it anymore she skirted the table to kneel in front of him.

"I'm sorry, Dean. I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have pushed you," Ella whispered anxiously cupping his cheeks in her hands, they were cool against his face. "Breathe Dean, stop pushing against it, clear your mind and think of something else, anything else."

He wrapped his hands around hers as the pain faded, the tightness around his throat loosening, the stabbing pain that had started in his head receding.


	20. Chapter 20

"It's alright," he replied squeezing her hands reassuringly, but the hoarseness of his voice told her the toll it'd taken on him. "You need your memories Ella, I understand that."

"I shouldn't have pushed you so hard, I hate that this is at your expense." Ella whispered, she looked at him so worriedly, so distressed at causing him pain. She was so close to him. Her breath mingling with his. He couldn't stop himself from the kiss. Leaning forward his lips touched hers, she didn't respond even after a moment.

He pulled back to find Ella's eyes had gone wide, sightless and glassy, her pupils dilating leaving only a thin line of green.

… in a sweet kiss, longer than the last, more than just a fleeting caress. She was stunned and unsure, it was her first real kiss. The last one had been nothing but a light brush of lips. This was different, very different. As he brushed her lips with his tongue she pulled away taking a half a step back. Her hand raised to her lips unable to do more than just stare at him with wide eyes.

He was searching her face, worry creasing his brow, his hand was still on her hip burning through the fabric of the t-shirt she wore under the light waterproof cotton jacket she'd thrown on against the coolness of early autumn. Fear slipped through her, fear that what had happened before would happen again, that he'd pretend that nothing had happened.

Still, she couldn't stop her gaze from drifting to his lips any more than she could stop herself from slowly stepping closer, lifting her face to his. His hands slipped to her face cupping and caressing her cheeks with his thumbs as he met her lips with his.

She was new to the dance, but she quickly learned the steps, her lips moving with his, her tongue dancing against his, her arms twining around him pressing herself even closer. It was a new feeling, a deliciously intoxicating one, the hardness of his body against softness of hers, the way she could feel his heartbeat against hers, furiously pounding faster, even as their mingled breaths shortened.

She felt him pause and pull back, she could see a conflict in his eyes that she didn't understand, for the first time in her life all she could do was feel. Every nerve in her body was alive and singing, waiting. What for she wasn't really sure but she wanted to find out.

There was a softness in his gaze as he brushed her hair behind her ear, his knuckles caressing her cheek, again she lifted her lips to his. The kiss spun out, his hands slipping down her neck, leaving her trembling against him before he gripped her hips and pushed her back. He forced himself to slow the kiss before he pulled away all together.

Her eyes were as heavy as his, her lips tingled from his kiss, his eyes searched hers for a moment before he lowered his head, this time his kisses were soft and short.

It was as if he were trying to stop and couldn't. The idea had her trying to deepen the kiss but he wouldn't let her. Then his hands were cupping her cheeks and stopping the kiss all together even as his thumbs brushed against her cheeks and jaw again this time almost reassuringly. He touched his forehead to hers taking a deep breath.

"We've got to stop, you've got to trust me Ella," he said quietly, his chest rising and falling as quickly as hers. "Besides we have to find Jessi before she either does something stupid or something finds her."

"Ella are you alright?"

"Yeah." Her voice wasn't steady as she leaned against the table, allowing him to help hold her up. There was a sharp pain in her head that she was beginning to expect.

"What did you see?"

"You and I in the woods, you kissed me," she whispered. "It was the day Rico died wasn't it, the day I can't remember?"

He nodded, her hands were shaking, he stood and walked into the kitchen returning with a Coke.

"Drink this," he told her, she could only nod and lean against the couch as she took a few sips. "You need to be careful Ella and not push it."

"If I don't push myself then I've got to push you and Jessi," she replied shaking her head and taking another drink as she tried to curb her frustration. "I'd rather it be me. Besides I'm beginning to think if I don't push it we're going to end up in more trouble. Unfortunately, this memory did nothing except prove that I wasn't alone in those woods. It doesn't matter, even if you were there, even if you managed the Herculean task of injuring a Hell Hound without getting injured yourself, it couldn't have been a Hell Hound that scratched me."

"How do you know that?" He couldn't help asking.

Ella leaned her head back on the couch closing her eyes as she rubbed at her forehead for a moment before answering.

"Because according to Donvan Jameson, being scratched by a Hell Hound is like being scratched by a demon that's been pulled from a human host. Nana wasn't completely lying it does leave behind a poison, however, it's just demon poison. It's something every Guardian can handle with essentially simple first aide, that even as children we can manage. The wound needs to be rinsed with holy water until the wound stops steaming and then a salve is applied that keeps it from becoming infected. Every one of my family members would carry the salve in their first aid kits, it's made for us by the Brightmore witches, they've been helping us for years."

Ella paused to take a deep drink feeling the burn of it in the back of her throat making her pause before she continued.

"What's in the salve?"

"Nothing difficult to get ahold of, it's base is honey, which is a natural antibacterial agent, even modern medicine has started using medical grade honey for wounds. There are herbs that are either used medicinally or magically for purifying and cleansing. It's why we have the Brightmore's make it for us. They can charge the herbs magically. While the Hell Hound's poison is a little more potent than the average demon, the salve and the holy water would make quick work of it. No Hell Hound wound is going to cause what happened to me, nor does it leave traces in the blood of its victim like I've been told. Not unless it's untreated, which would eventually cause an infection and death."

Dean watched as she drummed her fingers on the table, as she tried to reconcile the new information with what she'd thought she'd known.

"Which leaves a more troubling question, if it wasn't a hell hound, what was it?" she asked. "And if they've been hiding what it was, was kill it after Rico and Grandda's death, or is it still out there?"

"I don't know," he told her truthfully. "My dad had us out of there before the rest of your family made it out to the farm."

"Well, it's something to think about," Ella sighed as she stood and stretched the muscles that were stiff from sitting on the floor. "Until then, I need to do some research on Eli's case, why don't you relax. We have cable, or you could catch up on sleep while I figure out what's causing problems for the construction crew."

Dean didn't argue, his head was throbbing, grabbing his plate from the coffee table he leaned back on the sofa cushions, after a moment's consideration he picked up the TV remote. He watched Ella out of the corner of his eye as she sat at the desk he hadn't noticed before tucked next to the balcony door. She flicked her hand in the mouse to being the computer to life.

Ella heard the soft sound of the TV turning on as she logged into the local library's electronic archives using Jem's passcodes. She spent the better part of three hours looking through information on the house, until at last she hit on an article from the thirties, a house wife had mysteriously turned up missing. From all accounts a neighbor saw her return to the house after walking her young children to school and she'd entered the house, but by all account's she'd never left it. Picking up the phone she hit the speed dial number for Jem.

"Hey Ella, any news for me?"

"There was a mysterious disappearance in the house in the mid-thirties, Maggie Sinclair was the wife of a highly respected business man and pillar of the community who mysteriously went missing. She was last seen entering the house, but when her husband came home from work she was gone."

Ella glanced at her notes double checking the facts before she continued.

"There were some rumors at the time that she'd been stepping out on her husband, it's possible that after the kids were at school he killed her for it. The other option is that the foreman of the construction crew that was working on their house had moved around quite a bit. There seems to be a handful of disappearances that followed wherever he went. Odds are it was either the husband after he caught her cheating or the foreman was a serial killer.

I could do some more research into it, to know for sure who did it, but I don't think it's necessary. It's an older house one that more than likely had a dirt floor in the basement that they used as a root cellar, the construction was for upgrades, apparently they added a concrete floor to the basement a few days after Maggie's disappearance. I'd take the sonar equipment out to the house and check the basement for her bones."

"Nice work, you're handling this Ella, your call on what to do next."

Ella took a deep breath to calm her racing heart, this was a test. It was everything she'd been fighting for, training for, and studying for. She took another breath to clear her mind as she focused on what needed to be done and how it needed to be gone about.

"You've been looking for something for Jonah to cut his teeth on," Ella said steadily after a few moments. "He should be more than capable of handling this. Given the circumstances I'll call Eli and have the crew clear out early, Jonah can take the sonar equipment over and search for Maggie's bones."

"Take care of it."

"On it, Uncle Jem," Ella told him, before hanging up. Despite the fact she desperately wanted to pepper Jem with questions about the information she'd come across, she knew she needed time to figure more out, to line everything up before she told him what she knew and demanded answers.

So instead she picked up the phone and put a call into Walt to get Eli's number. It wasn't difficult to get Eli to request the construction crew to knock off early, then she called Jonah. Her Uncle Jem's oldest was fifteen and well trained.

Their Uncle Dominick's oldest son was just a year older than Jonah and currently training with Jem, she gave orders for the two of them to load up the equipment needed to sonar the floor and locate Maggie's bones, as well as the equipment needed to remove them once found. Taking Maggie's bones to the cemetery to be properly recognized and interred should take care of any problems at the house. If things got dicey and Maggie was too far gone to allow for the boys to help her move on, Ella told Jonah to remove her at any costs.

She leaned back in the desk chair scrubbing her hands over her face, adrenaline alone had gotten her this far and she was fading fast. She hadn't had enough sleep the night before, especially considering the medication that Jessi had given her, but there were likely to be plenty of sleepless nights in her future, and there was still too much to take care of. Glancing at Dean, his gaze met hers for a brief moment before returning to the TV, from the explosions and periodic gun fire it sounded like he'd found an action movie.

Standing she stretched rolling her shoulders to work out the tension in them and headed into her room for her IPod, she'd let Dean continue watching his movie while she did some more research. After she would put a call in for Chinese food and have a brief training session with Dean before they ate.

Returning to the living room she took her place back at the coffee table and picked up a book.

"Do you want me to help?" Dean asked as she was putting the first headphone in her ear.

"No it's fine, watch your movie, I'm going to do a little more research, but we should probably get some training in before we have dinner. I'll text Jessi, she'll be hungry and she'd kill me if I get Chinese food without getting her some too."

She put the other ear bud in her ear and picked up a journal, it'd been written by one of Grandda's sisters, Siobhan Jameson, just a little over forty years ago. She'd skimmed through nearly three quarters of it before she finally found something that related remotely to the power she'd developed.

Every twenty-five years or so a demons surfaced, there were a series of natural signs that signaled its return, there were electrical storms, odd temperature fluctuations, and cattle deaths.

"Not unusual for an upper level demon, perhaps one of the Fallen," Ella muttered to herself as she took notes.

It was common for nature to rebel against the presence of the evil in higher level demon. The pattern had barely been caught the last time it'd appeared. It had visited various homes killing some leaving others, before disappearing entirely. What it had wanted hadn't been entirely clear.

Siobhan had stumbled on a series of odd deaths and suicides that she'd quickly realized were being perpetrated by psychics. All of them were twenty-three, as Siobhan researched the families she discovered the link.

"I wonder if they were Lost Lines," Ella whispered, not noticing Dean had stopped watching his movie and begun focusing on what she was saying.

It would explain why they were talented, she mused as she continued to read, making notes here and there.

The demon was looking for something in these kids, what it was Siobhan couldn't be certain. The last death Siobhan traced led her to a girl she was too late to save. The girl told the Guardian that she couldn't live with the evil running through her veins, she couldn't live with the demon blood it'd forced on her just before she died.

"Damn." Ella muttered shaking her head, feeling the heart ache at this girl's death despite the years that separated them. Demon blood was no more or less evil than an Angel. They had the same origins, every Fallen had at one point been an Angel. Lesser demons were created by evil tortured souls, once they'd distinguished themselves they were given the blood of their Masters, but it was the fact that they'd chosen a dark path before they were given the blood that made them evil.

All that Siobhan could do offer the girl the choice of a faster death, or the chance to give Siobhan what information she knew to stop the demon all together. The girl had bravely chosen the latter option.

According to the girl the demon had a plan, the girl could read minds and the demon hadn't realized her strength when it began talking to her telling her of the great plans it had.

Ella sighed wondering what it as about demons that made them pontificate ad nauseam. Other creatures certainly had a flair for the dramatic, but nothing quite like the demons. They seemed to love the very sound of their own voice.

Apparently the demon had wanted to pit her against others like her gladiator style, forcing her to kill those it had chosen or be killed. Most importantly none of the previous chosen had survived all of them had died before they reached the "arena", or they'd died in the arena. Time after time the last two standing had injured each other mortally. The one of last few of the chosen nearly fifty years before had been pyrokinetic and had set fire to the building killing all of those remaining as well as themselves.

Siobhan had attempted to save those of her generation that were being rounded up, but she'd found the pattern too late. Siobhan had finally come up against the demon managing only to injure it, before she'd been knocked unconscious and left for dead. She'd notated that the most defining characteristic she'd noticed in this particular demon was its eye color. It had yellow eyes.

That was interesting, Ella tapped her pen on the paper at that. She knew the basic classifications, lower level demons had black eyes, crossroads demons red, the Fallen had white… she couldn't remember a demon that had yellow. She made a note before continuing on.

Once Siobhan had come to she found blood left from both the demon and the innocent. Using it she'd tracked the innocent and once again been just steps behind the demon, steps too late.

Siobhan's civilian had been forced to kill multiple times, just barely surviving. Killing in the brutal manner she was forced to had opened doors in the brain. The soul of the girl was too weak to hold on to her humanity in the wake of what she was being forced to do. She'd been broken both soul and mind by the time Siobhan had been forced to kill her, barely surviving the demons that the girl had become able to control to kill for her.

"What did you find?" Dean asked quietly, looking up Ella just shook her head for a moment.

"Give me a second." Ella replied standing and turning for her room, after a few moments she came back with another book.

Paging through it she found the classifications of demons until finally she found yellow. It was a distinguishing characteristic of the Horseman of War, a demon that would only be released if the apocalypse began. He'd been locked away for centuries, but he had a son, Azazel.

"About fifty years ago, there was a rash of killings by psychics, Grandda's sister tracked a civilian trying to get out of the clutches of a demon that was using her. She went insane and dark from what the demon forced her to do and in the end apparently the girl could control demons, she was using them to kill for her."

Ella bit her lip staring blankly at the table, the fear and worry clear on her face.

"You're not insane and the fact that you're worried about it means you can't possibly dark Ella," Dean told her, when she glanced up at him he held her gaze the certainty easing the fear that was tightening her throat. "Besides you haven't been used by a demon."

"Are you sure about that?" Ella demanded. "Do you even know what attacked Rico? What killed Grandda?"

"Look even if it was a demon, what you used last night you did to help others not hurt them. You said the girl was using the demons to kill, you're not going to do that."

"It's a slippery slope Dean, how do we know using it won't turn me, or that I'm not playing into something's hands?"

"Again, fact that you're even worried about it tells me you're not dark Ella."

"Not yet," Ella muttered dolefully.

"I guess time will only tell on this, but trust me I've seen dark and you're not it."

She couldn't stop herself from wondering if his faith in her came from who he wanted to believe she was rather than who she actually was. How far down the path might Jessi and Dean let her lead them before they realized they'd made a mistake? What kind of damage could she wreck in the meantime? Could she turn them if she turned before they even realized what she'd done?

"Be careful Dean," she warned holding his look. "Many a Guardian has been turned by their faith in another that's strayed too far off the path before anyone else realized it. Don't pin your hopes on what you want me to be rather than what I am."

Turning away he bit his lip as he watched her walk away, it was good advice, he couldn't deny it, but he couldn't bring himself to believe that Ella had it in her to become the monster that she was terrified of. There was so much light in her, so much it was almost blinding at times and a little daunting. Still, there was nothing the other side enjoyed more than watching the light slowly dim and darken. Like the proverbial moth, evil was drawn to the brightest of humanity and it reveled in extinguishing it. The flame in Ella that burned so vibrantly would make her a target as much as the powers she was exhibiting and the position in the hunting world she was putting herself into.

He understood Jessi's nearly desperate need to protect Ella, he was beginning to feel it too. Jessi guarded the fiercely burning light in Ella as if by protecting her cousin she could keep her own darkness at bay. There were plenty of things that had darkened his soul in the field, marks that once they had touched his soul he'd never be able to strip them away, things that were worth it to save another soul. The more time he spent with Ella, the more it felt as if her presence had somehow washed him clean.

The bathroom door closed softly behind her, followed by silence. He wished that he could tell her what he saw, what she was obviously blinded to because she was looking at herself. Dean of all people understood that everyone was a harsher judge of themselves.

"Son of a bitch," he hissed, as a stray thought caught root in his mind. The fear that Ella had of herself stemmed from Eleanor, from her fears and not the truth of who Ella at her core was. How in the hell did he get her to see herself for who she was and not what her family had instilled in her?

Ella slumped against the bathroom door closing her eyes. More than anything she wanted to live up to how Dean obviously saw her, to how her cousin saw her, but she wasn't sure if it was even possible. Every soul was shadowed, everyone had faults, not even angels were the paragons of virtue so many believed they were. They'd proven they could fall for something that was as much a sin as greed and as much of a virtue as love. Nothing was immune and so neither was she.

Rubbing her hands over her face she straightened and headed over to the sink to splash some cool water on her face. Her mind felt overly full as if she'd spent a night cramming for a final and she still needed to get in at least a brief training session with Dean.

Drying her face with the hand towel, she shrugged, a training bout might take the edge off of her unease. Reflexively she stared into the mirror, the bathroom had been shadowed as the sun had moved across the sky toward the western horizon, but it hadn't been dark enough to turn on the light. In the dimness she wondered if her eyes were playing tricks on her, it wasn't her face she was looking at, it was her mothers. Her memory of her mother had faded over the years to that of a photo worn with age and often handled, but now, as she stared at what should have been her own reflection it was as sharp and precise as if Delphine were standing in front of her.

"Maman," she whispered in shock, the mouth didn't move with hers, instead it twisted into the disapproving frown Ella had been subjected to time and time again.

"You're a disappointment Eleanor," Delphine replied, the faint French lilt that Ella had only half remembered.

It'd been so long she'd almost forgotten that Delphine and Elise had learned to speak French before English. The Beauchamps had been an institution in New Orleans as the Jameson's had been in Boston and South Bend, however, most of the American contingency of the Beauchamps had been nearly wiped out requiring some of the French family immigrate to take over the strongholds in New Orleans.

Strong holds that had slipped when Elise and Gabe had died, since Delphine wasn't a Guardian to be tied down she much preferred the gypsy lifestyle of the road. Instead of leaving the road, she'd chosen to let the city fall after Elise's death rather than hold lands that the Beauchamps had maintained law and order in for centuries.

Had there not been a more pressing need for Delphine and Aidan on the road than in New Orleans at the time, they might've had a choice. By the time the mistake had been made to let the Big Easy go, it'd been too late. Delphine had died, though even if she'd been alive she wouldn't have lifted a finger. As far as she'd been concerned the city that had taken Elise's life could raze itself to the ground.

"Maman…" Ella reached unable to help herself from touching the mirror, only to find the smooth glass. What she'd been expecting Ella didn't know, but the coolness of the mirror pulled her slightly from her shock.

"Do not know follow this path daughter, you will lead our family to wreck and ruin," Delphine warned. Ella's brow furrowed at the formality of her mother's tone. It wasn't completely right, something about the cadence, and the words Delphine spoke was off. It was her face, her voice, but not quite how she would've spoke.

"You're not my mother," Ella replied stepping back, but unable to tear her eyes from the vision.

"Oh, but I am, darling."

The face changed and Ella knew that this was her mother, before it had been as if she were a puppet with someone else holding the strings. Whatever was holding her had loosened its hold enough to let the true Delphine to come through. Ella set the thought aside as she focused on what her mother had to say next.

"Listen carefully Eleanor, stay away from hunting. We took you out of the game for a reason, don't undo everything by ignoring the laws we've put in place. You proved a bitter disappointment and if you continue on you'll prove a complete failure as well as create a catastrophe that will prove the Guardian's undoing. In undoing the Guardian's, you doom humanity. You're not as strong enough little Ella, you never were."

Her mother's eyes flashed blood red, for a moment Ella once again stood in the bathroom at the farm, the walls splashed liberally with blood, the horror of it enveloping her.

"She'll take you as she's taken them all," Delphine hissed. "She'll hold your soul as she does mine."

"Ella?" there was a pounding on the door that took her attention from the mirror. "Ella open the door."

"Heed her warning," the voice changed back to the original speaker bringing Ella's attention back to the mirror.

She watched in horrified fascination as it cracked, instinctively her hands flew up to protect her face just as bits of glass flew at her.


	21. Chapter 21

Dean heard the water turn on as he muted the TV, part of him wanted to comfort her while another part knew it was better to give her a little space. He couldn't help wishing he could help her, take this from her. He scrubbed his hands over his face. The self-doubt and constant feeling that there was something just on the edge of her understanding must be maddening. More than anything he wished he could just tell her what had happened. Sitting with his hands clasped his elbows resting on his knees, he waited with as much patience as he had in him which to be honest, wasn't very much and never had been.

The hair on the back of his neck raised, his head slowly raised to look at the bathroom door. His gut clenched and his muscles tightened. Something wasn't right and he'd been doing this too long not to trust his instincts.

"Ella are you alright in there?" he called as he reached into his duffle for a sawed-off pump shotgun with its salt rounds, his .45 Colt 1911 still rested comfortingly at the small of his back. "Ella?"

There was no response, the silence hung heavily. There was a distinct feeling he might not be able to handle this one on his own. It was strong enough that he couldn't chance it, not if Ella was in danger and every instinct was screaming that she was. Scooping up her phone he flipped it open to her contacts, Jem's name popped up before Jessi's and he faltered pausing at the door of the bathroom.

The air in front of the bathroom was markedly cold, his breath came out in ghostly white wisps. Immediately trying the handle, he found it wasn't locked, however, it wouldn't open. It was stuck.

Once again he looked down at the phone. More than likely Jem was just down the hallway in his office and while he knew Jessi and he knew her fighting style; he also knew how she'd react in this situation. As likely as it was that Jessi would kick his ass later, the better option might very well be Jem.

When it came to Jessi it was far too likely, with Ella involved, she'd do something stupid and if Dean needed back up it was better to have the older man. He knew Jem could detach himself if necessary in a way that Jessi would never be capable of, particularly when it involved Ella.

"Ella," he called again, his voice raising, pounding on the door with his fist, every muscle was rock hard and tensed, ready for whatever was beyond that door. When yet again she didn't answer, he hit the call button and lifted the phone to his ear. "Ella open the door."

He heard her respond, her voice too low for her to be speaking to him, too low for him to understand what she was saying, but there was disbelief and shock in her tone. The door was cold under the fist that rested against its surface. Glancing back at the door knob Dean found patterns of frost glittering over the brass surface and his heart dropped into his stomach before flying back into his throat.

"What's up Ella?" Jem answered immediately, while a little distractedly.

"Not Ella," Dean replied curtly. "She's currently locked in the bathroom and I can't get in."

"What do you mean you can't get in?" Jem demanded, his attention immediately focused, his voice going almost cold and completely unemotional.

"Well, judging from the ice collecting on the door and the fact I can see my breath I'd say she's locked in there with a ghost, and it's got the door. Get your ass in here."

Dean dropped her phone before he jogged a few steps back and charged the door leading with his shoulder. It didn't so much as budge but he hit it again anyway. The jarring of his shoulder reverberated through his body as he pounded into the door heedless of the pain. His heart picked up as he fought down the panic that was steadily creeping into him, threatening to freeze him.

He couldn't afford to panic, after all it was the whole reason he called Jem over Jessi, but damn it he needed to get into the damn bathroom.

There was a feeling of déjà vu about this, memories of being sixteen and fighting with the door at the farm playing at the edges of his mind. It was everything he could do not to start shooting through the door.

Logically he knew it was stupid, he'd be shooting blind making Ella as much of a target as anything that was just on the other side of the door. Still his mind whispered that a poor chance at survival would better than none.

"No," he hissed, shaking his head. Ella's only chance lay in him getting in there with her, not shooting blindly.

Ella's cry of pain had him fighting viciously with the door knob again before he took a step back and planted his foot directly next to the door knob. To his relief the door frame shuttered and with it came the sound of splintering wood. He followed it immediately with a second kick that had the frame splitting entirely and freeing the door just as Jem came flying into the apartment.

Sparing him barely a momentary glance, Dean turned back to the bathroom to locate Ella. He found her curled into a ball against the wall, tremors visibly racking her body. Glass shards lay around her twinkling in the gathering dusk like the first stars of night. Flipping on the light Dean immediately noticed the broken mirror, from the semi-circle that fanned from the mirror itself into the room it looked as if it had exploded. There was only a single jagged shard left in the frame.

Was it bad luck to further break an already broken mirror? Dean couldn't help wondering as he crunched over the shards, cautiously approaching Ella. Blood was already starting to flow from the cuts on her arms, gently he touched her shoulder as he crouched in front of her. Lowering her arms, she stared at him with confusion and fear warring in her wide eyes, her skin deathly pale while her breathing was rapid. She was in shock and he needed to get her out of the bathroom. He couldn't shake the feeling that they were both being watched.

Lifting her gently into his arms, he noted the small bloody handprint on a piece of the mirror laying on the floor in front of him. His mouth tightened into a fine line, he knew what it was, it was a calling card.

Seven years ago, he'd seen a handprint on the mirror in the bathroom at the Jameson farm. The same small size and the same delicate feminine shape. Tightening his arms around Ella as he turned. He could feel something was lingering there just beyond his reach, just beyond his poor human eyes. Which he hoped meant that left them just beyond whatever it was. Every instinct screamed at him as he turned his back to carry Ella from the room, but it also shielded the woman in his arms from view and offered her the protection of his body.

Crossing to the couch Dean set her carefully down before he sat on the coffee table to assess the damage done. There were cuts and nicks scattered across her skin, most of the damage to her forearms and upper arms, but thankfully the majority of them were shallow. There was one at her hairline that was bleeding profusely. A quick check told him a few butterfly bandages was all it would need. Even the smallest of head wounds tended to bleed like the devil.

It seemed that Ella's arms had taken the brunt of the attack, there were a couple that also would probably need a few butterfly bandages. The worst of it appeared to be a cut that ran from her collar bone to the upper swell of her breast. He could see the glittering of the mirror shard that had cut her shirt when it had embedded itself into her skin.

Turning to ask Jem for a first aid kit he found the older man had stepped inside the bathroom, his eyes undoubtedly fixed on the handprint. Every muscle in Jem's body coiled as his eyes flew to Ella and then to Dean where they shared a look of mutual fear and understanding.

"What's going on?" Ella demanded, her voice barely above a shaky whisper. She cleared her throat, her brain kicking into overdrive as the adrenaline began to pass through her system. Both men looked at her as her eyes darted back and forth between them, a shrewd look sliding onto her face that told them that even in her shaken state she hadn't missed any of their silent exchange.

"Why don't you tell us what happened, and I'll do my best to tell you what I can," Jem replied as he opened the cabinet below the sink and took out Ella's med kit.

Ella heard the calm soothing tone her uncle used, but his eyes betrayed the fact that it was his voice alone that was calm. Had she not been able to read exactly how upset Jem was she would've snapped his head off at the way he was already dancing around the truth, telling her whatever in the hell was going on she wasn't going to get a straight answer. She barely curbed the urge to start pulling at her hair and screaming like a toddler.

For a moment, she was bone weary, exhausted, and so tired of the constant dance she had to perform to maintain this charade with Dean and Jessi, let alone Jem. At least with the first two she understood it wasn't in their control. They physically couldn't answer her but Jem, he had all the answers damn it. For whatever reason he just didn't seem to feel the need to share them. Ella wasn't certain how much longer she'd be able to take it.

As Jem set the kit on the table next to Dean, he regarded her with hooded eyes clearly seeing the irritation in her own. In all honesty he didn't like it either but the game had changed the moment he'd seen the handprint.

This was going to have to be handled with the utmost delicacy, if his Ma got even the slightest whiff of what had happened, it would all be over. Everything he'd been working for would be shut down so fast it would leave all their heads spinning and the girls would lose their chance to get back what had been unfairly taken.

Jem had no illusions, no doubt that if Eleanor heard of this she'd use it as leverage. She already had the family convinced there hadn't been an attack since Rico and his Da. He needed to finish up his research to have complete and absolute proof that Maria had been picking the Jameson's off in the field while Ella had been banned. Every bit of information had to be collected and everything had to be completely solid so that his mother couldn't twist anything to her side. If Eleanor got ahead of him and took the attack to a Conclave her fear mongering could be as effective as it had been the last time. Eleanor was a master at manipulating people.

He sighed as he let Dean open the med kit and riffle through it pulling out antiseptic and butterfly bandages, while he watched Ella unwaveringly, waiting for her to tell him what happened.

"There was something in the mirror," Ella began quietly, but steadily. "It looked like my mother, but it wasn't entirely her either. It was my mother's voice. Even some of her emotion but the way she spoke and the words she was using, it wasn't entirely her."

"You saw Delphine?" Jem asked sharply, his eyes narrowing, this was new information. Was Maria using the soul of Delphine or was she using just her image?

"It was her and it wasn't Jem, I don't know how else to explain it. At first it was as if someone was speaking through her. I honestly thought I was talking to my mother for a moment. It was her voice, her face but it wasn't entirely her. There was something off about it, almost like I was looking at a slightly distorted image and then it was definitely her…" Ella let her voice trail off before it broke as she blinked rapidly to hold back the tears. She wasn't certain what was worse. The odd almost puppet like response at the beginning of her mother's warning or the final portion where it had most certainly been all her mother.

"Damn," she muttered. She'd thought she'd gotten past the lost little girl that had wanted so desperately to please her parents. The girl that had fought to mold herself into whatever form would gain their approval because she knew that no matter what she did they wouldn't ever love her, but she couldn't stop herself from trying. Neither of her parents could've ever loved her if her mother was to be believed.

No matter how old she got, how much she understood Delphine hadn't had it in her to love her child as a mother should, it still hurt. It was a wound that would never entirely heal. She hadn't ever been able to live up to what her mother had wanted her to be. The feeling that she'd been a complete disappointment, almost a failed experiment to her parents would always be a part of her.

Most of the time she could push past it and see it entirely from an intellectual standpoint, with a distant logic that told her the lack was in her parents not herself. However, every now and then that lost hurt little girl still took over.

"What did she say to you Ella?" Jem's voice was soft, understanding, it took everything she had to trap the sob in her chest and blink away the tears. Avoiding Dean's gaze she fought to continue. For a moment, his fingers tangled with hers giving them a brief squeeze, surprising her. Still she refused to look at him unable to bear the thought of his pity.

"She warned me to stay away from hunting, she told me I wasn't strong enough and because of it I would tip the scales dangerously," Ella's voice was bleak. "That was one hundred percent my mother. I know that tone. I know the disappointment and the absolute belief that I was a failure and would never be anything but a failure."

"Ella," Jem growled, his face a picture of pure disgust. "Look at me Ella, no you look at me…"

It took her a moment to raise her eyes and meet her uncle's. She wasn't quite prepared for the fury she saw simmering there.

"You listen to me very closely Ella Jameson. Delphine was a self-righteous bitch. She never did understand what you're capable of and she wouldn't see it now any more than she did then. The only reason she spoke to you was because she could chip away at your self-esteem playing you right into the hands of what controls her."

"And what exactly is that Jem?"

Jem looked away for a moment before looking back at her with regret, "I can't tell you yet Ella, none of us can, but I need you to have faith that I'm working on it. Everything will be explained. It will all be fixed."

"That's not good enough Jem," Ella snapped. "I need this cryptic bullshit to stop, how long do you expect me to survive if you keep me in the dark about what I'm up against. What was in that bathroom was strong, the darkness unlike anything else I've ever felt before, except…"

She trailed off her eyes going distant, for a moment Dean was afraid that she would slip away into another memory, but her gaze remained clear, her brow furrowed in as she fought to remember what was teasing at the edges of her memory.

"Except when Rico died," she said slowly, softly, looking up at Jem with dawning understanding. The flash of standing in a liberally blood splashed bathroom suddenly clearing leaving her with a brief, yet precise memory. "The handprint on the mirror was left by whatever killed him."

"Ella, I need you to just trust me, give me until after the hunt. Once you've passed that test, it will prove I'm right. That Ma is wrong. We prove that and every single one of those doors Ma shut seven years ago will be opened. We prove that everything she warned the family about were nothing more than her own fears."

"How do you know she wasn't right?" Ella demanded picking up Siobhan's journal, her irritation coloring her voice. "Do you recognize this book?"

Jem focused in on it, his eyebrow raising, his expression telling her he recognized it but he just couldn't place it and was confused with what it had to do with the current situation.

"It's great-aunt Siobhan's journal Uncle Jem. On one of her hunts she came across a group of psychic young adults, all twenty-three. They were being targeted by a demon. In my opinion this wasn't just a group of any psychics. The first one of these kids she was too late to save. The girl committed suicide. She did however manage to tell Siobhan before she died that it was a yellow eyed demon and it was looking for the strongest and the best of her generation. Apparently the demon fed her its blood as an infant to strengthen her powers but she believed that he'd tainted her. It was why she killed herself."

"For God's sake Ella!" Dean snapped at her, obviously ignoring the conversation as he tried to patch her up. "Be still!"

"Sorry Dean." She muttered at him, watching her Uncle closely and wishing fervently for her cousin.

Her Uncle raised his brows as he watched Dean's hand shift aside Ella's shirt to clean the wound at her collar bone. His hands were steady, but Jem didn't like seeing them on her. It only served to remind him of the fact that his girls had grown up, and while he enjoyed the benefits of them being adults, he had no interest in even thinking about what else that could mean. Especially considering neither Dean nor Ella appeared particularly uneasy with his hands on her. Jem barely suppressed a shudder as he tried to focus on the subject at hand.

Dean shifted his eyes to Jem as his hand slid partially down Ella's shirt. He wasn't particularly thrilled with the audience, unfortunately it couldn't be helped. Hell, he was the one that had called Jem after all.

There was an itch at the back of Dean's neck leaving him wondering if he should be expecting a bullet at any given moment. It'd be stupid to think Jem wasn't carrying. To his relief, Jem gave him a brief warning look and turned his focus back to Ella.

"I remember more now," Jem replied rubbing the bridge of his nose as if trying to stave off a headache as he tried to follow where Ella was leading him. "Siobhan tried to save the others, but there was only one remaining standing when she got there. The girl had been the sweetheart of her school. Truly a gentle spirit and the demon broke her. Forced to survive by the brutal deaths of those that had challenged her, she'd begun to control spirits and minor demons, Imps really. She could make them kill for her. Siobhan was forced to put her down. There was no coming back from what she'd become."

"This thing pops up and then it's sixty years before it goes under again. He selects his recruits and gives them his blood when they're babies. He then sits back and waits. He starts toying with them making them think they're evil because of his blood. I think he's picking Lost Lines and strengthening the Guardian blood, boosting their powers, but telling them that they are evil, dark, without hope of becoming anything else. At twenty-three he pits them against each other until the last one's standing. Siobhan wasn't able to save any of them. It took a huge toll on her. The demon used the girl as an attack dog, forcing Siobhan to kill the very person she'd been fighting so hard to save."

"Trust me on this Ella, circumstances weren't the same, even if it were, you're not the right age for this. It's something we've been warned about, we know from the signs he resurfaced in '83, but unfortunately we only have where he appeared, we don't know exactly who he picked. It's something we're completely aware of."

"That wasn't my point, everything I read has told me that anyone with my powers go insane, dark, or becomes suicidal and perhaps with good reason."

Ella wiggled as Dean continued brushing her skin as he patched up the cut on her chest. She hadn't realized before exactly how sensitive the area was until now. She was certain her cheeks were flaming and as much as she wanted to slap away Dean's hands, she knew it would only draw attention to how she was feeling. With Jem right there she wasn't certain she wanted him to know anything of what was happening with Dean beyond his agreement to protect her.

"You're neither insane nor dark, as of now," Jem sighed rubbing his hands over his face again, betraying just how frustrated and exhausted her was. "There's a chance that it's only been seen in Guardian's that have gone dark or insane because they either didn't care to hide it, or couldn't hide it. It's something we should monitor, make certain you can use without affecting you, but it may be a talent that was hidden or it could just as easily be something new. After what you've survived it wouldn't be out of the realm of possibility that you've developed new talents. Ones that haven't been seen before."

"What do you mean what I've survived?"

"Just one more thing to put on the list to explain later." His voice was gruff with frustration. "I'm sorry. I wish it could be different."

"Why can't you tell me?" Ella cried. "If there isn't something wrong with me, why can't you tell me what's going on? Why have Jessi and Dean been bound from talking about the past? I'm fighting here with all the cards stacked against me."

"I know and I don't like it any more than you do, but this has to be handled delicately Ella. I'm doing everything I can to help you, you've got to believe that. If I don't watch my step very carefully on this, the consequences could be disastrous for the Guardians, all of them Ella. Each and every one of them."

Ella studied her uncle, his gaze earnest, he could be an incredible liar, an actor worthy of an Academy Award if necessary, but her gut was telling her he meant every word. Weighing her options she came to the conclusion that there was nothing she could do. She couldn't be certain she could rely on her uncle one hundred percent. At that moment though her only option was to be patient, leaving her with the only other option of offering a reluctant nod of agreement before she set the journal back on the table next to Dean.

Dean growled at her irritably, mumbling under his breath as he attempted to clean the cut running down her chest.

"You should read the pages I marked," Ella told him stiffly. "According to this Azazel's death match between the psychics happens every fifty years and you said yourself he resurfaced in '83 which means we have a little over 5 years before he starts the cycle all over again."

"Maybe I will, but right now, I'm concerned about you." Jem told her, patting her head in a rare show of affection.

The door flew open, Jessi barely made it through it on her feet, her knife drawn and a look of terror and hatred on her face. The three in the room startled their eyes flying to watch as Jessi stumbled into the apartment, her normal natural grace completely deserting her.

"Where is it? What's going on? Are you okay, Ella?" The words tumbled out of her mouth haphazardly and on top of each other, the fear foremost in her tone.

"You're a little late to the party," Ella said with a wry smile.

"Damn it, I got here as soon as I could."

"I know," Ella replied softly with a tired sigh.

Jessi scanned the situation, as she slid to a stop a few feet from her uncle. She hadn't been able to break away from the bar any sooner, but she'd felt Ella's terror as though it were her own. It had taken everything she had to stay focused on what she'd been doing and not cause a scene downstairs until she could break away.

Sheathing her knife with shaking hands as she came to the conclusion whatever had been here, was gone.

"What happened, what did I miss?" Jessi muttered with barely suppressed anger and terror, "Jesus, Ella, your sliced to pieces!"

"There was an incident in the bathroom." Dean muttered turning his attention back to carefully bandaging the cut near Ella's collar bone.

"Yeah, Freddie Krueger made an appearance."

"Bathroom!" Jessi screeched, her tone causing all of them to wince.

"Breath, Jessi." Jem said moving towards her, his eyes warning her.

"Why is the bathroom a trigger for you?" Ella asked looking from her cousin to her Uncle and then sighing, knowing it was yet one more question none of them could or would, in her Uncle's case, answer.

"Shit." Jessi muttered, the gag order constricting her throat as she fought to answer her cousin, the despair and fear in Ella's eyes too much for her to ignore.

Ella met Jessi's eyes, watched her cousin swallow convulsively and her eyes fill with tears. It was all just too much. In a rare show of temper Ella pushed Dean irritably as she got to her feet, swaying for a moment. Dean grabbed her arm to steady her and had Ella turning her anger on him.

"Stop it, I'm fine, perfectly fucking fine!" She hissed before stomping towards her bedroom, leaving all of them staring after her in shock.

It was too much, it was all too much. The infuriating feeling of helplessness only fueled her impotent fury leaving her slamming her bedroom door hard enough to have the walls rattling in an attempt to alleviate some of it.

"Everyone keep Ella in the dark, she's too weak and useless to handle the truth," she hissed to the empty room as she strode to the windows to stare into the darkness.

The sky was partially clouded, the full moon half hidden, yet still lighting up the darkness in the street below, stars winked from the clear portions. Her breath fogged the window and she had to fight the urge to put her fist through the glass; to channel her fear, confusion, anger and pain into something tangible, something she could focus on.

She'd spent so long following orders, doing what was asked, but tonight, tonight she could've died. What's more the need to end the creature in the mirror was overwhelming. Not just because it had attacked her but because of the others she'd felt.

It'd almost been as if she were channeling Jessi's powers. She'd been overwhelmed by the emotions both her own and others. Whatever that thing in the mirror was it wasn't a shape shifter. It had her mother's soul, she could feel it and she knew it. It wasn't something she could explain, but then trusting instincts that couldn't be explained wasn't something any Guardian would scoff at.

Running her fingers through her hair she paced. Historically the best way to trap a soul was to kill it which made her wonder how many other souls were trapped, however many it was, they'd been used as a weapon, it hadn't been fear of the unknown creature that had paralyzed Ella, it'd been the projection of their pain. Combined with the sense of keen disappointment and failure of her mother it'd left Ella fumbling in the darkness. Underlying the veritable sea of emotions had been rage and hatred, a kind that she couldn't even begin to understand what she'd done in her relatively short life to inspire.

The sound of Jem and Jessi's voices cut through her churning thoughts, she could hear the anger and frustration that mirrored her own in her cousin's voice. Tilting her head, she listened, inspiration suddenly striking. Dean and Jessi couldn't tell her anything, but that didn't mean they couldn't tell Jem. Would the spell work if they weren't focusing on her, if they didn't know she was there? It couldn't hurt to test it out and perhaps they'd let something slip that would give her the ability to figure out what the hell had happened on her own.


	22. Chapter 22

_AN: Well this chapter kicked my ass. It finally took rereading the last and running an addition before we could get it rolling. Still not sure I'm 100 % happy, but eventually you've got to call it. I'd recommend checking the last few paragraphs of the previous chapter as there are changes. Thank you everyone for bearing with us._

"What in the hell did I miss?" Jessi demanded looking from her Uncle to Dean as Ella's door slammed. She watched with mild interest as Dean tossed the gauze in his hands down and pushed the medical kit away in a mild show of his own fraying temper.

"Go take a look at the bathroom while I help Dean clean this up and then we'll talk, briefly. I'll need to get back downstairs to finish your shift, since I'm pretty sure you won't be going back down there once we have."

Jessi didn't bother to react to that statement as she moved down the hallway to the bathroom. She saw the split door frame as she flipped the light switch and couldn't help the gasp that escaped her lips. There was glass everywhere, the mirror a total loss. Scanning the room, she caught sight of the small bloody handprint on the shard that lay on the floor.

She hadn't seen the hand print for herself when Rico died, but she'd heard it whispered about seven years ago, and seen it in Ella's dreams. Clenching her fists, her lips thinned as she looked at the offending bit of glass with rage. She slammed her boot down on the shard with all the force she could muster, to her frustration it didn't so much as crack. Settling for kicking it she watched as it spun across the floor and behind the toilet before she turned to stalked back out to the living room, swiping Ella's phone from the floor as she did.

"What is going on?"

"I have theories only." Jem told her gesturing for her to take a seat next to Dean on the couch who was already nursing a glass of whiskey.

Jessi crossed her arms over her chest, cocked her hip and an eyebrow at her uncle, and began lightly tapping her foot impatiently.

"Maria."

"Maria." Jem agreed, confirming it, even though it hadn't been a question, "Well if you aren't going to sit. I am."

He took the chair, resting his elbows on his knees his hands holding his own glass between them.

"This is what I believed would happen all along. It's why I've been working tirelessly the last seven years to undermine Ma, to overturn what was done. The bitch isn't going to stop and she isn't going to remain dormant. I firmly believe this proves it. Unfortunately, it'll take more for the rest of the family to see I'm right."

Jessi began pacing the floor, unable to stay still.

"Explain that, Uncle Jem. While I have a basic understanding, Dean doesn't know any of it, and I think it's past time he does. He's a part of this, I think we both know he always was."

"Maria was a woman that our ancestor Eleanor was sent to stop because she had powers that she was abusing," Jem sighted turning to look at Dean. "Despite the severity of her crimes, Eleanor couldn't order her death because she was pregnant. So, until the child was born Eleanor delayed sentencing imprisoning her for the duration of her pregnancy. Unfortunately, after the baby was born, before final sentencing, Maria killed the entire garrison stationed at her prison and used the power she garnered from their deaths to disappear into a mirror, popping up from time to time to taunt Eleanor and gain even greater power by killing those unfortunate enough to be on the other side of the mirror. The only way to stop it was to work a spell to trap Maria in the mirrors until those with the power to end her were born, the spell took Eleanor's life."

Jem paused, for a moment almost certain he'd heard the soft click of a door opening. It'd been soft enough he might not have caught, but every one of his senses were on high alert.

"Keep going Uncle Jem." Jessi muttered.

His eyes narrowed as he noted that she listening, but her eyes kept straying to the darkened hallway. Smart girl, Jessi might not be able to tell Ella anything but there were no restrictions on him beyond his word.

"That's about all, it'd be best if we go over the rest one time with Ella as well. Once we get through the next hunt and I can confirm a few things, everyone will need to be on board."

"Wait a minute," Dean looked up from his glass of whiskey, his gaze shifting between the other two as he spoke. " You said those with the power to end her were born? You mean Jessi and Ella? She's been banned all this time and Ella's supposed take this thing down? It's why she was attacked then and now isn't it?"

Jem stared at Dean for a moment, he'd spoken something that Ella wasn't supposed to hear, the spell should have kept him from being able to talk at all. That was interesting, it appeared there was another loop hole, one that hadn't occurred to him. If things didn't go as he was hoping or something happened to him; it was an interesting angle to exploit. For now, Jem decided to give a safer answer, one he could manipulate if necessary.

"One of our ancestors made a prophecy, given that prophecy has a tendency to be vague at best, but it was widely believed by the Guardian's that Ella and Jessi were born to fulfill it."

"So, what changed Uncle Jem?"

At the sound of Ella's voice Dean turned to find Ella leaning against the wall, the anger was still burning in her eyes, her smirk a mirror of Jessi's. Turning his gaze back to Jem, he found annoyance but no surprise.

"Damn it," Jem growled before sparing Jessi a brief glance. "Really Jessi, do you think you're being clever?"

Jessi just shrugged, her only regret was that Ella hadn't been there from the beginning of Jem's explanation, it would've made everything so much easier.

"I can't go into detail with any of you."

Ella's gaze searched his face, fury still sparking in her eyes, her frustration practically palatable as he shut down her questioning. Jem watched as her jaw tightened for a moment, a muscle ticking as her lips thinned as she decided it wasn't enough. He found himself both proud and annoyed by her stubbornness.

"There was a time it was believed that Jessi and I were meant to fulfill a prophecy. I'm betting that's why our training started so early, apparently, it's why I was attacked seven years ago and why I was attacked tonight. How much longer are you willing to hide this Jem? Why is the family willing to hide this, what in the hell did I do seven years ago that made everyone so damn afraid of me?"

Silence followed her question, Ella could feel the awkward shuffling of both Jessi and Dean, she could feel their desperate need to answer a question neither of them were capable of. Ignoring them she kept her focus on Jem, on the one person that could give her the answers she so desperately needed.

"This thing is going to kill me Jem, is that what you want? Is that what everyone wants? Because keeping me out of the game and ignorant obviously isn't enough to keep me safe. Don't you get it? Keeping me out of the game and ignorant isn't keeping me safe."

"Son of a bitch," was all Jem said as he rubbed the bridge of his nose, but didn't elaborate any further as Ella paced her anger escalating to fury, an impotent fury that she hated.

"I felt that thing's rage and hate, the only reason I walked away was because it couldn't. It's the only thing that makes sense, it didn't have the juice or something else was holding it back. The moment whatever's holding it fails or it gains that power I'm dead and I'm definitely not okay with that."

"Ella," Jem sighed. "I just need you to be patient."

"Be patient Ella, just wait Ella, give me some time Ella. I'm getting really sick of hearing that, maybe you're on Nana's side after all, maybe this is your way of setting us up to fail."

"You have no idea what you're talking about," Jem bit the words off, finally pushed beyond the point where he could control his own temper. "You have no idea what I've gone through for you and Jessi. You don't know the half of the kowtowing and kissing the Elder's asses I've had to do for the past seven years. I've spent every moment towing the line to their specifications and keeping a spotless reputation. There've been countless sleepless nights setting each piece into place and refiguring when either the two of you or my mother threw a wrench into my strategy to get both of you girls where you are now. We are on the verge of not only proving Ma wrong, but giving you back everything that was taken from you. Of giving you a choice in what you want for your life rather than have it restricted by the Council. Seven years of my life spent giving you your life back little girl, so don't you dare accuse me of setting you up to fail."

Dropping her eyes, Ella struggled with the bitterness of shame and the ashes of her fury coating her mouth making it difficult to swallow.

"I know I'm pushing you, and most people wouldn't be handling this with half the grace you have," Jem told her quietly. "I understand how difficult this is for you. I get that this has been years of secrets and confusion for you, but I promise just a few more days, just until you finish the hunt."

"A few days?" Jessi demanded. "You have the hunt then?"

"I do, Ma sent the information a few hours ago, I was just printing it off when I got the call from Dean. We have a wedding here tomorrow night and I need all hands-on deck, which means Jessi heads out the following morning. That gives you a day to do some prep work and outline a plan. Ma will be in town tomorrow, which means Dean, I need you to stay up here and out of sight the best you can in case she decides to come here."

"What if she wants to come to the apartment?"

"Then I'm sure you can figure it out. If you can't avoid a seventy-five-year-old woman, Guardian or not, you have no business in the field."

"Fair enough," Dean muttered. "But it's like being freaking grounded."

"And with no Casa Erotica, poor Dean, how will you fill your time?" Jessi quipped, watching with delight as Dean's cheeks flushed and he deliberately avoided Ella's gaze. In all the years she'd known Dean she'd only managed to get a blush out of him a handful of times, mostly because the man seemed to have no shame. It was a rare treat that would amuse her for months. Turning her gaze to Ella she found her cousin an even brighter red, even as she tried not to laugh.

"Shut up Jessi."

Jem cleared his throat, his expression all business while the twinkle in his eye belied it. Shaking his head, he headed for the door. Ella pushed off the wall to follow him, still frustrated and feeling unsettled, but there was no help for it.

"Ella, I've printed out the files, if you want to come down to my office to get it," he called over his shoulder.

Despite that fact, Ella had no way to figure very much out, not until she had the pieces no one would or could tell her. Still, she couldn't help her mind from spinning things around, taking the pieces she did know and trying to fill in what she didn't. It was as though if she just kept working it around and around eventually she'd figure it out. It was beyond exhausting.

Her eye lit on Siobhan's journal still sitting on the coffee table among the gauze packages and butterfly bandage wrappers. With a sigh, she picked it up.

"You're going to want to take this Jem, we have five years tops before this shit storm is going to hit the fan. We should keep it on the radar just in case we manage to get through this one."

"You're right, bring it with," Jem replied with a shrug.

Silence filled the apartment as Jem and Ella slipped out the door. Looking around Jessi found that Dean wasn't in the living room with her any longer. The sound of glass clinking told her he'd gone into the kitchen, he returned a moment later handing her a glass as he picked up the bottle that they'd left there the night before. Not for the last time Jessi understood why it was so easy for Guardian's and Hunters to became alcoholics. The emotional rollercoaster of the past few days was giving her whiplash.

"Do I want to know?" she asked rubbing at the stiff muscles in the back of her neck.

"Ella found some information on a demon that likes to play mind games with psychics, possible Lost Lines or so she says," Dean responded with a shrug and a deep drink. "It gets off on twisting them and then doubling down by rounding them up to set them against each other in a gladiator style death match. So far no one's been left standing so there's no telling what his end game is."

"You mean other than setting people against each other and twisting souls? Nothing out of the ordinary in that alone, it's just a new way of doing the same old thing."

"The way Jem and Ella were talking about it, it sounded like there might be something more to it, but we won't know until it resurfaces. Unfortunately, it only does that when it chooses its next victims or when it rounds them up for the fight, so until its next move there's nothing that can be done."

"What made Ella bring it up now?"

"Apparently your Great Aunt Siobhan was the last Guardian to try to take the demon on, one of its chosen turned on her and was using other demons as her own personal hitmen."

"What?" The word was sharp and left Jessi just staring at him for a moment, her mind frozen by the implications. "You don't think there's that's what's happening to Ella?"

"I doubt it and Jem seems to agree. The timing isn't right for one, and the others seem to have gone insane and completely dark side before they could use even access that particular power."

Jessi let out a sigh of relief as she took a deep drink of her whiskey, letting the sharp smoky flavor roll over her tongue before swallowing, enjoying the way it burnt its way down her throat. Closing her eyes as she took another drink letting the alcohol sooth her, taking the edge off her agitation at the argument and the burgeoning nervousness of the hunt that was bearing down on her. It was what she'd been waiting for eagerly and now that it was finally happening the pressure of getting everything right was setting in.

"I don't know if I can do this."

Jessi's eyes snapped open to study Dean. He wouldn't meet her gaze, instead he stared at a spot on the floor as he rubbed the back of his neck anxiously.

"Can't do what Dean?"

"I just…, I don't…, fuck."

The last was hissed as he uncharacteristically struggled to speak, with equally uncharacteristic patience she waited for him to find the words. After a few moments, she was rewarded when his eyes meet hers and he finally managed to continue.

"She could've died today Jessi and I was useless," he told her. "I left her alone in that bathroom and Maria almost got her, on _my_ watch. I was fucking helpless. I'm supposed to be watching her back, guarding her against this kind of shit and I failed spectacularly. I'm beginning to think you're wrong, I'm not the one for this, I'm not the one that can protect her. You need someone better."

"There's no one better," Jessi replied with finality. "what were you supposed to do follow her into the bathroom every time she has to pee. I'm sure that'd go over really well."

"That's not the point."

"What do you mean?"

"Damn it Jessi, you know what I mean," he snapped jumping to his feet and turning on his heel to face the windows. He rubbed the back of his neck again, every muscle so tense it made Jessi ache.

"So, what are you going to do?" Jessi demanded. "You going to leave?"

"I've never walked out on a job."

"Is that all she is, a job Dean? Because if that's all this is walk away now. Give her one of the many excuses you've got stored away to ditch a girl and leave now."

"You know she's not just a job, she's never been just a job. There's too much history for it to be a job and that's the problem. I can't get distance to do what needs to be done."

"That's not the problem Dean, if anything it's going to make you better at it. No one could've predicted what happened. You got to her before it was too late. You protected her just like you did seven years ago, more importantly she isn't dead and she isn't badly injured, that's a win in our line of work."

"I don't know…" Dean was cut off as the door swung open admitting Ella with a couple of file folders in her hand. At the sudden silence she looked at each in turn.

"Am I interrupting?"

"Not really," Jessi replied, gesturing for the files. "Are you going to share with the class? Where am I headed/"

"You'll get a kick out of this, New Orleans."

"Nana's sending me home?"

"I thought the farm was your home," Dean broke in.

"No, Jessi was born at the Beauchamp plantation just outside of New Orleans and my parents left me with hers nearly six months before that. Uncle Gabe and Aunt Elise ran the city."

"What do you mean ran?"

"New Orleans has always been a hot spot," Ella explained. "My mother and Jessi's were sisters and the last of the Beauchamp line. The family's job was to keep things kosher. When Aunt Elise died, the only Beauchamp left to control the city was my mother and she'd have preferred if it sunk into the bayou. There hadn't been anyone brave enough to take control again since. Anyway, the hunt is at a home, in the French Quarter, to be more specific 1140 Royal Street. "

"You're shitting me," Jessi gasped her eyes snapping to her cousins as she set the file down and picked up her whiskey. "How can that possibly be right. It's practically a pilgrimage, a right of passage, if you will. That house has been checked and rechecked by nearly every Hunter and Guardian there's been."

Ella shrugged, she wasn't wrong, every Guardian or Hunter worth their salt at some point or another had gone through the LaLaurie House, hell, even most civilians knew of the home. H.H. Holmes's "Murder Castle", or the Villisca Axe Murder House or 112 Ocean Avenue in Amityville, New York. It'd earned its reputation thanks to its demented owner, a woman that had been Elizabeth Bathory and Charles Manson all rolled into one, something she'd managed to hide until a fire in 1834. When the neighbors came to help put out the flames they'd found a room in her attic where her slaves had been tortured and experimented on medically. It'd been terrible enough a mob had marched on LaLaurie's home, but she'd given them the slip, leaving with her husband and daughters for France.

"Ella, even you and I were in that house as kids on a dare, before..."

The pain in Jessi's voice snapped her out of her review of the papers. She watched Jessi as she swallowed painfully, her eyes clouded.

"We were in that house?" Ella demanded, attempting to steer Jessi away from the painful emotions of the loss of her parents, while at the same time searching her memory bank.

"We were. Probably not more than a month or so before everything changed." Jessi's voice was low, her eyes distant, "We'd been teased by some kids at school. We were too small, too sweet, and too damn gentle to ever attempt anything as insane as going into that house by ourselves. Of course, they had no idea what we were, who we were, and it isn't exactly like we could mouth off. Not to say I didn't try, any number of times, but you always managed to somehow wade in at just the right moment to keep me from saying too much."

"Well there's a shock." Dean's voice was wry, although even he kept his voice low. Ella sighed with relief as she saw Jessi's eyes narrow dangerously before she flipped him off and moved to the window to stare out.

"Keep going, Jessi. I think I'm starting to get vague memories of it." Ella encouraged. Jessi threw her a smirk over her shoulder and started pacing.

"I think even you'd had enough of those particular kids. There was a stocky boy, a complete bully, and both of us had been dying to knock him on his ass, though neither of us had. His sister wasn't any better nor her friend. "

"How old were we?"

"Eight, I think I don't even remember their names. Either way, you told them we wouldn't only go into that house by ourselves, we'd do it at night _and_ record it."

"I find that hard to believe, Jessi." Dean muttered plopping down on the couch heavily. Jessi barely sparred him a glance.

"As much as I hate to agree with Dean here..." Ella said taking a seat in the chair and closing the file on her lap. She could almost smell the Louisiana humidity.

Jessi chuckled low and took the final swig of her whiskey before she set it down on the coffee table for Dean to refill. He did so, without so much as words passing between them. Jessi picked up the glass and went back to pacing before she responded.

"To be fair, your both right. Your parents had just been there for a visit, however. I think you were feeling frustrated and angry and like you needed to prove something."

"Oh," Ella said softly as her eyes went distant.

 _"How are you ever going to become a Guardian, you'll die first hunt at this rate." she heard her mother's voice sharp, waspish in her mind._

She'd faltered vaulting in the obstacle course on Uncle Gabe's property. One that she'd run perfectly for the past few months. The sudden appearance and seemingly never ending critical commentary had left Ella anxious and on edge. Not that was a good excuse for her mistake, but she'd recovered admirably. More than anything she'd wanted to channel Jessi and tell her mother off, to remind her that bad placement pushing off to vault anything could happen at any time to anyone, that it was the recovery that was important. The only thing that had held her back was the knowledge that it wouldn't matter, anything short of perfection wasn't to be tolerated and there was nothing that she could've said that would've made a difference.

"You remember." Jessi whispered lightly, walking over to squeeze Ella's shoulder.

"I do." Ella said patting Jessi's hand and offering a sad smile.


	23. Chapter 23

"Well I wasn't there and I want to hear this now." Dean sat up, his eyes moving between them, " You know, for the hunt. It could be important."

Jessi rolled her eyes, a laugh erupting from her chest, "I call total bullshit. Although, I did need the laugh, so thanks for that."

"Have you never been in the Lalaurie House?" Ella asked curiously, studying Dean.

He shifted uncomfortably under that gaze, his eyes moving to Jessi who was still chuckling, one eyebrow cocked, waiting for his answer. He took a deep gulp of his whiskey and leaned back into the couch.

"Of course, I have." Dean said, his voice raspy from the whiskey. He cleared his throat and tossed them an amused smile " As you said, it's a rite of passage. We spent some time in New Orleans, I was about 13. We were just old enough and dumb enough to be sure there wasn't anything we would come across that we couldn't handle, assuming there was anything to handle in the first place. From what I understand the place has been pretty tame for years."

"It has, it was cleared by our great grandparents right after the fire that outed LaLaurie." Ella replied.

"So, what changed?"

"In the past few months six people have died. The LaLaurie house has been under construction, two of them were construction workers, the others have been civilians looking for a thrill."

"Do you think the construction woke something?"

"That's always a possibility, in fact it's usually the root of a haunting starting in a place that's been cleared for as long as this house has been."

"Far be it for me to be the voice of reason normally, but we need sleep, all of us." Jessi broke in, both Dean and Ella looked at her in surprise.

"We have little more than twenty-four hours before the hunt Jessi," Ella argued. "We need to make the most of the time we have to come up with a plan."

"You were attacked today Ella and I can see the exhaustion in your eyes. We all need to be in top form for this and that includes sleep, or we'll be in worse shape than we'd be with no plan at all."

"I can sleep when this is over," Ella returned irritably, brushing off Jessi's words as if they were completely groundless. "You should get some sleep Jessi, you need to be in peak physical form, I don't, remember. I'm staying here where the worst I'll have to worry about is a paper cut."

Jessi's gaze met Dean's at the of traces bitterness that probably wouldn't have registered for anyone besides the two of them. Jessi had known Ella her entire life and as much as Dean wanted to pretend that his heart wasn't in the palm of Ella's hand because of it he knew her nearly as well.

"You heard Uncle Jem, once this hunt is done and over with you'll have a choice as to whether you stay in the library or head into the field," Jessi replied carefully. "Either way, I need your mind as sharp as you need my reflexes."

"She's right Ella."

Both girls looked at Dean in surprise, after all it was a rarity for him to ever agree with Jessi, there'd been plenty of times he'd argued purely for the sake of arguing.

"I can't count how many times I've gone into the hunt with a plan and thought I knew what I was up against only to find out I was wrong. I've been forced to retreat and reexamine the clues to find the truth. Experience tells me that we need to rest now because all the research in the world isn't going to help until Jessi gets to ground zero and can scope it out."

Dean stood and strode to Ella, taking her by the shoulders and looking at her directly, appraisingly.

"It's not just your eyes, you're nearly dead on your feet, it's been a long day. Between the hunt last night and the attack today you need to get some rest. I get you're keyed up and the adrenaline hasn't completely faded yet, but you've got to try to rest," he told her softly running the back of his fingers down her cheek.

"Do you need something to help you sleep?" Jessi asked, worry furrowing her brow. "Do you want me to sleep with you?"

"No to both," Ella replied after taking a deep breath. "It's almost a given that I'll have nightmares, if I take something I might not be able to wake up and if you sleep with me I'll keep waking you up. You need the rest even more than I do. I'll get some blankets and a pillow for the couch."

Ella strode from the room, exhaustion showing even her movements. Jessi's eyes followed her cousin, her concern palpable.

"I'll keep an ear out for her," Dean told Jessi, noting the apprehension on her face. "Smothering her because we're worried is only going to make things worse. Give her some space, if she has any problems both of us are here."

"Are you here Dean, one hundred percent?" Jessi demanded growling under breath and grabbing his arm and squeezing tightly enough he could feel the bite of her nails in his forearm. "If you were to look up fear of intimacy and commitment in a medical journal you'd be their prime patient to make their case. I don't want her to rely on you and then you use your supposed inability to protect her as a reason to bail."

"I'm here Jessi, I've always been here, for you and for her."

Searching his expression, she could see the truth, reaching out with her gifts she could feel it as well, he was afraid of his feelings for Ella, but as she'd said she knew him. He'd never forgive himself if Ella got hurt because he bailed and it was enough to keep him there despite the very real urge to get out before he couldn't.

"Good," she responded with a nod as she released him. "Because I can't do this without you. With Nana coming into town I'd be worried about what she'd do to Ella while I'm gone."

"Whatever she's done Jessi, she'd never hurt Ella."

"Not intentionally no, but she's not the woman you remember Dean. You know the lengths she's already gone. She's about to get desperate, she's Saruman Dean and the war with Mordor has started."

He looked at Jessi blankly.

"Look you may not have read the Lord of the Rings, but please tell me you at least saw the movie."

"Been a little busy for the theater lately Jessi."

"It's a great movie," Jessi said with a shrug. "However, what I mean is she's going to do everything she can to sabotage this hunt and if we still manage to pull it off, I don't think it will stop her. Part of why we fought so much when I was younger was because in so many ways we are very much alike. She's stubborn as hell and her mind has been made up and as I said before she's going to get desperate."

"Which means there could be no limit to what she'd try to do."

"Exactly. While she wouldn't ever try to hurt Ella, what Nana might do in attempting to protect her could very well hurt or kill her."

"Got it."

Dean's gaze shifted as Ella moved back into the room, carrying the blankets and pillow she'd promised. She didn't say anything, but her eyes shifted warily between the other two for a moment as she set everything on the couch.

"If there's anything else you need, let me know."

Dean nodded as Jessi leaned over to flip open the med kit, rooting through it she picked up a bottle and tossed it to Ella.

"I can see the pain, take something for it so it doesn't keep you up."

Ella grumbled in response, but she opened the bottle and shook out a single white pill before putting the bottle away. Jessi watched until she popped the pill in her mouth and picked up a glass of water from the coffee table to chase it with. Nodding in satisfaction Jessi called goodnight over her shoulder and headed for her own bed.

"Get some sleep Ella, or at the very least try," Dean told her. Giving him a brief smile she nodded and followed Jessi's example.

Echoes of Dean thudding into the closed bathroom door were ringing in her ears as she shut her door. At the time, it had been muffled and her focus had been completely on the mirror. Now with the memory of being trapped so clear in her mind she had to force herself to turn away. She wouldn't give into the fear, she couldn't.

Quickly she changed out of her clothing tossing the shredded blood stained shirt into the trash, hissing as her movements pulled at the scabs of the cuts littering her body. The jeans she tossed into the hamper, there were blood stains but as the shards had hit her upper body it was possible they could still be salvaged, she'd soak them in the morning. She was far too tired to worry about it at the moment. As much as it irked her, Jessi had been right. She could feel the adrenaline beginning to wan and in it's place a bone deep exhaustion.

In her closet, she pulled out flannel pants and a cloud soft cotton tank. Pulling them on she sat on her bed and settled herself before picking up her brush from her nightstand to begin carefully working out the tangles. Clearing her mind she enjoyed the soothing mindless task. She let it calm her until she decided she'd put off trying to sleep long enough and braided it back. As she curled around her pillow she was certain she'd do nothing more than toss and turn but instead she was asleep within minutes. The exhaustion finally catching up with her regardless of her racing mind.

Opening her eyes, she found herself in a dark room, the door clearly outlined by the light coming from beyond it. The shadows danced in the darkness making her nervous. She carried a flashlight but it wouldn't turn on. Moving swiftly to the door she tried the handle only to find it stuck. Tugging at it she found it wouldn't budge. Something was coming. Something in the darkness she couldn't see. Something that hated her and that wanted her death, but before that death it wanted her pain. There was a voice coming from the other side of the door, one that she knew.

"Dean, help," she cried slapping her palm against the door as she continued to fight with the handle despite the fact she knew it was futile. "Dean please, help me."

"I can't Ella, there's nothing I can do," Dean's voice said from the other side flatly.

"Please, please, please," her voice broke and terrified sobs slipped from her throat.

"I don't want to help you."

The pain of his words had tears of more than fear slipping from her eyes, whimpering she slid down the door to the floor, curling protectively around herself. Closing her eyes for a moment she fought for control, if Dean wouldn't help her she'd have to help herself.

When her eyes snapped open she found herself across the room from the door, the light still shining around it while she lay on something soft. It took her a moment before she realized she was in her room, the sound of the TV in the living room playing softly and the light shone around the door from the light in the hallway. Her heart raced as she stood and made her way to the door, the knob turning easily under her hand.

On a half sob of relief, she opened the door to find the golden light of the hallway pouring into her room. For a moment she just stood in the doorway trying to decide what to do. She could return to bed but she doubted she'd be going back to sleep anytime soon. Her heart was only barely beginning to slow its pounding pace.

The TV was already on, it was possible Dean was still awake and if not she could curl up in the chair next to the couch to watch something that would take her mind off her nightmare. She could've crawled into bed with Jessi but it wasn't her cousin's comfort she wanted. Yet at the same time she didn't want to be alone.

To her surprise, she found the couch empty, only the dent in the pillow telling her he'd even laid down at all. Guilt struck her as she stepped up to the French doors to stare into the darkness beyond. It must not have been particularly comfortable on the couch. Maybe she should've let Jessi sleep with her and given Dean her bed again, but she'd wanted to seem strong, able to handle everything that had been thrown at her alone.

Unable to help herself she turned to look at the bathroom, the soft light of the TV and the lamp next to the couch illuminating the dark room. She shivered at the memory of how dark that room could be. She took a few steps toward it and she could see the glass had been cleaned up.

Only her wounds and the empty frame where the mirror had hung in the bathroom were left as evidence that something had happened. How long had she been asleep? The medicine that had been taking the edge off her cuts and the headache that had been plaguing her for the past few days was kicking up telling her it was time for more. Her dream certainly hadn't helped the dull thudding in her temples that was rapidly aching more on her left side and blurring the vision in the corresponding eye. Sighing she picked up the bottle Jessi had thrown at her from the still open med kit and took a second dose.

"Ella?" Despite the fact she immediately recognized Dean's voice, it still startled her. Whirling she found Dean standing in the doorway of the kitchen, a fresh bottle of beer in his hand. "What are you doing up?"

"Bad dream." She replied simply, punctuating her words with a shrug before she moved to the chair and curled into herself. "How do you handle it? How do you settle after a hunt? How do you sleep?"

Dean sighed, he couldn't very well suggest drinking until pleasantly buzzed followed by a night with the nearest available partner, and failing a partner, just drinking yourself into oblivion.

"Usually because I haven't had more than a few hours for a few days and I pass out once the danger has passed." he told her giving her half of the truth instead.

"And the nightmares? Or do you just not get them?"

"Everyone has them from time to time, if you didn't you wouldn't be human. It depends on the person, I suppose. Sammy used to read," Dean told her, returning to her first question. "Something about taking his mind out of this world for another that had a happy ending helped him cope."

"I don't want to read, I can't relax, I can't focus," Ella sighed, she looked as lost as she sounded and he hated it. She might not believe it, but she was tough, how she was even handling everything without the information that could cost her life he didn't know. If it had been him he'd have lost it already and tried to beat the information out of Jem. Now looking at her so vulnerable, he couldn't stand it.

Pushing away from the doorway Dean crossed the room and scooped her up from the chair before settling back on the couch with her in his arms.

"There's nothing I can do to ease your mind right now, all I can do is be here," he said quietly, leaning against the arm of the couch with her head on his chest, his arms around her. She held herself stiffly against him for a moment and he wondered if he'd pushed too far.

"Thanks," she whispered, her muscles releasing suddenly as she burrowed into him. The scent of the woods, eucalyptus, and a scent that was all him filling her nose, comforting her. Even if she couldn't remember her past with him, some piece of her did. The scent of him, the feel of him, it quieted her mind and settled her.

Dean shifted long enough to pick up the remote, his attention on the TV as he flipped through the channels. There was a flash of a brilliant red headed woman that disappeared into a flurry of silvery-blue light.

"Oh stop, stop" Ella commanded. Glancing down he raised an eyebrow, but complied. She just jerked her shoulder and lowered her head again into the curve of his shoulder fitting as if she were made to.

"What in the hell is this shit?" he couldn't help asking after a few moments.

"Oh, just shut it," she replied smacking his chest never looking up from the screen. "It's Charmed and it's awesome, deal with it, my breakdown – my show. Just admire their racks and let me have the rest."

He chuckled shaking his head, but he let her have it even though he'd rather be swamp deep in a bayou rather than watching the somewhat campy show, though he had to admit she was right about the actresses figures.

Predictably Ella lasted until about the last ten minutes of the show, shifting down carefully not to wake her, he pulled the pillow under his head to get comfortable and pulled the blanket over the two of them.

Putting his arm behind his head he shifted and wrapped his other around her waist tucking her into the curve of his body as he turned back to the TV. He'd already watched most of it, it wasn't his fault if he wanted to see how the damn thing ended, even if he'd never admit that to anyone else, even under torture. His eyes drifted shut lulled by the feeling of Ella against him, safe and sound.

The TV had long since gone to infomercials when Ella woke again. At some point, they had both shifted Dean's arm wrapped around her, their legs tangled together, his breath gently puffing against the back of her neck. Still only half aware, she dimly noted it felt like a light caress. A caress that tingled through her and had her squirming. Her shirt had ridden up, something she didn't realize until she felt his fingers brush down her bare stomach to grip her hip in a way that left her arching instinctively against him.

His breath caught in his throat against a moan he silenced as he felt her bow back against him, her body brushing against his and settle cupping him in a provocative way he knew she didn't mean for. Opening his eyes, he saw her eyes closed, but her brow furrowed, her lips parted on a sigh that caught and her breathing picked up.

There was a little voice arguing against him, telling him to pull away, but he ignored it as he let his fingertips brush the curve of her hip bone. Her hips rolled against him as he lowered his head to her bare neck.

"I know you're awake," he whispered as his lips brushed against her throat, she rolled her head to give him better access though she didn't open her eyes. Letting his hand trail up her stomach he gently shifted her onto her back even as he rolled on to his side. His lips worked their way up to her neck ever so softly and then to her lips. Once there, the gentleness dissipated like mist in the sun.

The kiss was hungry and desperate, Dean swallowed her keen as his hand brushed her breast. She allowed herself to be swallowed by the emotions and feelings, letting it overwhelm her, letting her mind go quiet to everything but him. She had no argument when her shirt disappeared and watched through hooded eyes as he made short work of his own. The feeling of his bare chest against her had her whimpering, but when he reached for the tie on her pajama bottoms she froze.

Feeling her hesitation, he pulled back and searched her face.

"Ella?"

Her hand came up to rest over his, neither pulling him away nor urging him on.

"I…" a blush flamed across her cheeks as she avoided his gaze. "I mean…"

"Just tell me if you want me to stop."

"It isn't that," she replied, the color deepening. "That is… I… I've never…"

Silence fell between them as she was having a difficult time explaining further what she meant and he tried to put the pieces together through his sleep and lust clogged mind. The moment it did his mind became crystal clear.

"You haven't ever…" he trailed off as his eyes narrowed and he watched her carefully.

"No," she whispered. "It's not a big deal… there hasn't been time really or anyone I was interested enough in…"

Sitting up Dean ran a hand through his hair as he stared at her wide eyed, he'd known she wasn't very experienced, but he hadn't realized exactly how inexperienced she was. He felt the instant and instinctive bolt of fear slam through him with a force that was greater than any dicey hunt he'd ever been on. It certainly wasn't the first time he'd found himself in this position, and if there was one rule in the Dean Winchester handbook on women, it was to steer clear of virgins. Emotions were hard to keep from the physical act when you didn't have the experience to understand the difference and he couldn't afford the attachment.

They watched each other with a breathless fear as he struggled against his instinctive reaction. His gaze held her clear emerald colored eyes that were wide with a mixture of fear and self-consciousness, her eyes still clouded with lust and suddenly he realized it didn't matter. It was Ella, the girl that he'd once hoped to be her first years before. He'd never entirely understood the "Star Trek" mentality with women and before he hadn't bothered analyzing his emotions about why it had always been different with Ella. She woke a protectiveness in him, a possessiveness in him, and the idea that no matter where she went or who she was with she'd never be able to forget him, it was something he wanted. It was something he never thought he'd have when he left the farm so many years ago. Something inside of him clicked.

"It is a big deal," he finally said quietly. Instantly her face shuttered. He gently brushed her cheek with his knuckles, effectively stopping her from pushing him away. "No, no, Ella. I don't mean it like that… that is…." He paused and took a deep breath as he continued to stroke her cheek soothingly. "What I mean is that it shouldn't be like this."

"Like what?"

"It shouldn't be a quick roll on the couch, over quickly just in case Jessi gets up to use the john. It should be in your room, in a place where you can be comfortable and we can take things slow."

Her eyes darkened as what he was saying filtered into her mind. Gently he slipped his knuckle under her chin and raised it, their breath mingling as he moved closer still.

Searching her gaze for a moment he dipped his head gently brushing his lips against hers. The kiss was a question; he was asking her if she was sure. She responded by wrapping her arms around him and crushing her lips to his. His hands fisted in the back of her hair for a moment before he released her to slide his hands down to her hips. He stood for a quick moment and grabbed the shirts they had discarded before he sat back down and gently lifted her into his lap. He cupped her cheek, his fingers combing into her hair. She turned her head rubbing her cheek against his work roughened, battle scarred hand while his lips traveled down her neck producing a soft moan as he lifted her, her legs wrapped around his waist, her head fell onto his shoulder as he carried her to her room.

"Do we have to worry about Jessi hearing?" he asked softly, his breath against her skin making her shiver.

" _Taceo_." She said quietly touching the door frame as they passed it. "We can magically soundproof our rooms, just in case. Jessi's idea."

"Of course, it was," his voice was amused, but there was breathlessness to it as he carefully released her, letting her body slide against his as he set her back on her feet. He held her gaze for a moment before his lips captured hers again hungrily, his hands sliding down taking greedily what she'd offered. The shirts he'd held slipped from his fingers. Her fingers dug into his biceps as he lowered her to down to the bed, her breath shortened to gasps as he paused to let his fingers trail from her neck down to the edge of her pants. Her eyes studied him, even as her body quaked under his hands. Golden skin stretched taut over defined muscles, only the white lines of battle scars marred his skin. He had the body of a warrior god.

Unable to stop herself, she hesitantly touched him, running her hand down his washboard stomach. The muscles jumped in response, swiftly he captured her hand and threaded his fingers through hers before he swooped back down and captured her mouth. His lips moved on hers, his tongue against hers. He nipped at her bottom lip before trailing kisses down her neck. His lips branded her as he bared her skin, his hands caressing her leaving a trail of fire.

His hands caught her wrists as he fought to move slowly to keep from pushing her too fast. Painstakingly listening for every sigh, every catch of her breath, using it to push her further until she whimpered, until her breathing shortened, until she rocked instinctively against him, her eyes glazed and glassy.

She followed where he led her, nothing had prepared her for what was happening, for the way it felt when he touched her, for the way it felt the first time she felt his skin against hers, or for the way she involuntarily moved against him. She didn't realize he'd shifted until she felt the swift burning pain, her body arching, those beautiful green eyes swimming with tears. Instantly he stilled, every muscle quivering as he fought to keep from moving while her body adjusted.

"Don't move," he whispered, brushing away the tear that slipped down her cheek. Dropping his head, he kissed her softly, druggingly until she responded, until he felt her body loosen under him. Pulling back his eyes met hers watching her as he carefully rocked against her. She whimpered, the sound caught between pain and something else. He continued to hold her gaze as he moved slowly. He took her back up little by little building the pleasure and the pressure. He fought to hold onto his own control using every bit of his experience to bring her to the pinnacle. Just when he wasn't sure he'd be able to hold on any longer he was rewarded. In that moment he realized just how unprepared he was for the beauty of her unraveling underneath him, the intensity of finding that release together as he finally let himself go.


	24. Chapter 24

The light of the lamp tinged everything with a golden glow, or perhaps it was just an afterglow. People often waxed poetic about such things, people Dean had thought stupid and softheaded until now. Not that he didn't appreciate the satisfaction that came with a good romp in the sack, but this was different, as different as it had been to lose himself in her. Rolling to his back he took her with him wrapping an arm around her waist even as her head curled into his shoulder and he took a steadying breath.

Ella on the other hand had no thoughts, it was a surprisingly freeing feeling, one that was gone all too soon. It simply wasn't in her to let that blissful mental vagueness continue for any length of time.

What would Dean do now? The thought slipped through her treacherous mind sending that moment of peace spiraling into chaos. For most of her life she'd been warned away from 'that guy', the dangerous bad boy that only wanted one thing and made no apologies for it.

Ella might be inexperienced, but that didn't make her stupid, which is exactly what she would be if she thought that one night with her would change him. Her own heart might already be more wrapped up in the man than she wanted to contemplate but it didn't mean that Dean's was.

'Pessimist,' Jessi's voice whispered into her mind.

'Realism,' she was unable to help from the mental retort. 'I refuse to be blinded to the possibilities because I don't like them.'

'But there are possibilities in either way Ella.'

She snorted and covered it with a cough, only with Jessi could she have an argument while her cousin wasn't even awake let alone in the same room. But in here, in the privacy of her own mind she had to admit Jessi was right. This thing between her and Dean could go either way, life was full of surprises after all, who knew what was going on in his mind. All she knew was he cared, he cared enough to protect her, enough to make her first time a good experience. Really she could only enjoy what they had for as long as they had it. To have this experience whether it ended in heartache or not.

What was it Madame Dumond had said? 'A little heartbreak could be good for the soul', or something like that. The point was in her typically poetic French way Madam had been telling her to live even if living meant pain, after all who got through life without a broken heart? Pain was part of life and no one could avoid it forever not without shutting down their emotions entirely and that wasn't a good option.

Despite the dates Jessi had tried to set her up on, or encouraged her to agree to, they'd been boring. She hadn't found an interest in them. There had simply been no spark. For years Ella had wondered if there was something wrong with her, something broken in her. Jessi had told her she was just too picky, but she wasn't willing to force what wasn't there.

It was as if all the guys before had been blurred, slightly out of focus, or they blended into their surroundings blandly, until Dean. From the moment she'd first laid eyes on him in the pub everything had stood still for a moment before it had all sprung into brilliant focus. It was as if she'd woken up the moment he'd come into her life. As ridiculous as it sounded it was as if she'd been wrapped in a spell that had suppressed any romantic emotions. She rolled her eyes at herself, but something just niggled at the back of her mind. What if... that was a thought…

It occurred to her that it went further back than the last few years, it went back to Dean and the spell Nana had worked. After that point in time she hadn't had any romantic flights of fancy that were common in teenage girls.

Unlike Jessi she hadn't been boy crazy, she hadn't had the crushes that came and went. She'd never scribbled a boy's name beside her own on her notebooks and she'd never doodled her first name with a crushes last name just to see how they looked together. The very idea had never even crossed her mind, although she'd watched her cousin go through these typical rites of passage with bemusement.

The spell had been breaking, pieces of her past were resurfacing since Dean had walked into the bar. Had this been a side effect of the spell Nana had cast? Like medicine such things had side effects, some unforeseen and some known. The potential outcome of the side effects had to be weighed against the cost of not working it.

Everything circled back around to the same question she'd been asking herself over and over again. What the hell had happened all those years ago? And what could she have she done that had made working such a spell worth the cost?

Had Nana known the possibility of the spell leaving her emotionally stunted and still worked it? And if she hadn't, what had kept her from removing the spell once she realized what it had ultimately done? Had Nana turned a blind eye to the results? Had she even cared one way or another?

Fury flashed through her, if even a small part of her thoughts were truth, and her gut was saying it was, then the woman she'd loved, had trusted, had given the utmost respect to, had treated her with a careless disregard beyond anything Delphine had ever managed. After all her, the truth was that her mother hadn't meant to be hurtful, she just hadn't been able to split her focus between family and hunting, nor had she had a maternal bond with her daughter. Delphine hadn't been capable of it. Ella understood that, but her grandmother? Eleanor had been the salve to that particular wound, she'd had a mother in Nana, or so she'd thought, but she wasn't so sure anymore.

Ella had always had a maternal streak a mile wide, a need to provide a home, comfort and safety to those she'd loved. Her grandmother had known that. In fact, Nana had encouraged it, fostered it and strove to teach Ella how to balance it with hunting. The only thing Ella had ever wanted for herself, her deepest most heartfelt wish, had always been to have a family. To right the wrongs of her own childhood by giving her children everything Delphine hadn't been capable of. To be like her Nana. She wanted to be capable of going out into the field when she was needed and it was necessary, but mostly be the warrior that was often counted on to protect the hearth, home and family. The one trusted to remain behind and protect what was most precious, the next generation.

"I can almost hear you thinking."

Dean's rough voice startled her out of her thoughts, his calloused hand tilted her head up to meet his gaze.

"Those gears in your mind are practically grinding and whirring as you work out whatever it is that's got that little line appearing, right here."

He brushed his finger against her forehead near her right brow.

"I can't help it."

Her smile was rueful as she looked away, for a moment closing her eyes at the soothing way his hands were carding through her hair.

"Is it about this, about us?" He asked tilting his head to meet her gaze, his eyes unreadable. She blushed and shook her head. The last thing he needed was for her to turn all clingy right now. It would be the quickest way to run him off.

"Not entirely," she replied truthfully, using her arm across his chest to prop herself up to look down at him. "More questioning if Nana's spell wasn't the reason I haven't let anyone this close before…"

She trailed off as his eyes widened, damn that could be taken as clingy, but she took comfort in the fact he hadn't run for the hills yet. All she could do was try to explain.

"I meant that I haven't been interested in a brief fling any more than I've been interested in a relationship before…"

That didn't sound any better.

"Before me?"

"Something like that," she sighed as he shifted under her, his eyes hooding at her response, hiding his emotions from her. "What I mean is that I know from the memories that have come back that we had something that summer, a mutual childish crush, first love, whatever you want to call it. In the more natural scheme of things it might've fizzled out for one or both of us after some time, or maybe it wouldn't have, maybe it would've burned itself out only to rekindle later. Who knows? No one can because Nana threw the spell into the mix. However, my instincts are telling me that a side effect of making me forget who I was and who you were is that she froze that part of me. Until you came back and my memories started to return, pieces of me that I didn't know were missing started to return. It's like you woke me up and gave me back the ability to find love. Not that I'm in love with you yet. I mean…That is…"

Ella sputtered before she just stopped talking. It might be best to just remain silent. It appeared she was incapable of saying anything without eventually turning it into something that could be taken as needy and desperate. Her cheeks burned as she looked away, afraid to meet his eyes, afraid to see what could be there, unable to stomach the fear, the rejection, or worst of all the pity.

"I get it."

At his reply, she glanced back up in surprise, to her further surprise he didn't make a move to leave. Not that she would've blamed him if he had. Instead he brushed her cheek gently with his knuckles before brushing back the hair that had fallen over her shoulder, the hair she was currently trying to hide behind, before his hand returned to her cheek.

"I got to say it's the heaviest pillow talk I've had before."

"You mean you've had pillow talk before?" she couldn't help retorting, her eyes widening innocently as her lips thinned in an attempt to hide the smile that was suddenly dancing brightly in their emerald depths.

"Hardy har har, I'm not as emotionally stunted as Jessi's led you to believe," he returned wryly. He fell silent as he stared at the wall just past her head. Glancing back at her briefly he seemed to struggle to find the words, his mouth forming shapes even though nothing came out. After a moment he stopped, closed his eyes and took a deep breath before opening them again and looking at her directly.

"This job doesn't exactly make it easy to have more than a casual relationship, but that doesn't mean it isn't something I've wanted. Provided it was someone that could understand and handle the life," his voice was soft, even as his gaze was steady. "It's just something I haven't let myself want because I've been pretty sure I couldn't have it and that I shouldn't want it. I've seen what loving someone like that can do to a man once it's been taken away. There hasn't been a woman before that I wanted to risk that with or thought I could risk that with. Someone worth letting myself get that wrapped up in."

"You mean your father, don't you?"

"Sammy was too little but I have memories of what it was like before my mom died, of who my dad was. Before he could be a hard ass, but there was a softness too," Dean's expression turned distant as he dredged up the faded memories he so often kept buried and had never talked about before, not even to Sammy. "His eyes would light up when he came through the door after work and saw us. He'd swing me up into his arms and plant a big kiss on Mom. I remember after Sammy came along, he'd give the baby a kiss on the forehead and Dad would look up to give Mom this smile… it was soft and proud and like they were sharing a secret all in one. That light in his eyes died when Mom did, the softness disappeared, he's never been the same."

"The same thing happened with Nana, a light went out of her when Grandda and Rico died. I keep trying to tell myself that what she did was to protect us."

"But it seems like you're making excuses for her."

Dean finished what she'd left unspoken. His eyes sharp when they met hers telling her how much he understood. She nodded even as she felt like she was betraying her grandmother by admitting it, regardless of the fact that no words left her mouth. A betrayal she knew he understood as well.

"What if she does it again?" Ella hadn't realized it'd been a fear until it slipped from her lips and she couldn't stop herself from continuing. "What if we pass this test and she takes my memories from me again? She's so set on us, well let's be honest, me, not being any part of the hunting life. I'm just getting myself back, I don't want to go back to that shell. And who knows what would happen if she did the spell again, how far reaching it would become, how much of me would be wiped away this time. I don't want to forget again. I can't..."

"We'll talk to Jessi, to your uncle, there has to be a way to stop her. A counter spell, a charm that will reflect the magic back, something that can protect you. We didn't know what she was planning then Ella. We were far too young to have even guessed, but this time we do. I couldn't protect you last time, but I will this time, I promise."

He prayed silently that he would be able to keep his promise, that Eleanor wouldn't have another ace up her sleeve. They'd talk to Jem. If anyone would have any idea of what the old bat would be up to and what she might do it was him. Last time there hadn't been any way to see it coming to know how desperate she was and what lengths she was willing to go. This time he knew exactly what Eleanor was capable of and he'd do his damnedest to stop her.

Studying Ella, he could see the relief in her eyes at his promise, but there were still shadows under her eyes, and a tightness from exhaustion in her expression. She needed sleep if she was going to continue to juggle all the balls she currently had in the air, she needed to relax if only for a few moments.

"How about I start the shower for you?"

Dean's abrupt change of subject and sharp tone had Ella backpedaling, afraid she'd shared too much and pushed him into revealing too much. The kiss he dropped into her hair and the soft smile he gave her as he brushed her cheek one more time took the sting from his words, but it didn't alleviate her uncertainty. After all it wasn't like she had any other reference to compare it to and as much as she wished she could, Ella didn't have the power to read his mind. She could only watch as he pulled his jeans on and left the room.

Laying back on the bed she tried to reorganize her thoughts, sifting through what had been said only to find that despite their conversation she had no better grasp on his emotions than she'd had before. He'd said that he hadn't had a relationship before because of the life but that it was something he wanted. At the same time, he'd said that he'd seen what could happen to a man when he lost love and how it had discouraged him from trying.

"Ugh," she muttered irritably. Why hadn't she just kept her mouth shut? Why couldn't she have just enjoyed the time cocooned with him in her bed instead of opening her trap? She wished she'd taken just a few more moments to bask in that afterglow before she had to go and ruin it with logic and thinking. Not that a few more moments wouldn't have more than likely left her wanting even more.

The sound of the water turning on had her reluctantly leaving the warmth of her bed. She took her robe from the back of the door just as Dean opened it.

"It's warm enough, get in, relax," he told her.

Nodding she tried to slip past him, but he stopped her by grabbing her upper arm. Curiously she looked up to find him watching her with soft warm eyes, a look that confused her as much as their earlier conversation had. Did she trust her instincts on that look or did she trust what she knew of him?

Just to throw it all to hell it seemed, he cupped her cheek and kissed her. This kiss was soft, sweet, dare she say, tender. Giving her a smile he gestured toward the bathroom door and she followed his silent suggestion.

Only when the bathroom door was shut behind her and she leaned against it did she let her breath out. Confusion and a wild hope were swirling in her. One that she tried desperately to suppress. She couldn't expect anything, didn't dare. He hadn't made any promises beyond helping to protect her and she couldn't hope he would. Whatever happened she had to remain clear headed but hell it wasn't going to be easy.

Shrugging out of her robe she stepped into the shower, the water was a little hotter than she would normally have turned it, but under the circumstances felt wonderful. It eased the soreness and the stiffness of her muscles.

Idly glancing down, silvery shards flashed in the light that was dimmed by the shower curtain. Bending down she realized it was pieces of the mirror that had shattered earlier that had been missed in the cleanup. Involuntarily she took a step back. Her hand shook briefly at the base of her throat as her breath caught. Instantly her body was on alert, a piece of her reaching out instinctively. It wasn't something she could explain, or even remembered being taught to do, but it was an innate and immediate reaction.

She 'felt' the bathroom, there was no other way to describe it. It was similar to the sensation of feeling as if you were being watched, only in reverse. There was nothing there, nothing but a lingering trace of the creature that had sent those sharp bits of glass hurdling at her. Instantly her body relaxed. All of the emotions and physical responses cycling through before she even realized what she was doing.

"Huh?"

The single noise of surprise slipped from her mouth as she tried to make sense of what had just happened.

The momentary feeling of panic had been a natural reaction at seeing the shards in the drain. The memory of what had lurked in the pieces of that glass when it had been whole would have left most terrified. Yet whatever had been there wasn't there now and only slight lingering traces of it remained. Like a smudge on the mirror after someone touched it.

She was a little surprised that she was so calm about it. Though she supposed that it was logical that whatever it'd been it had used the mirror to reach her. The largest pieces had been taken out to the trash leaving only slivers of its portal behind. Not enough for it to attack again with any effect.

Bending to carefully gather the shards in her hand she could feel the energy signature on them, but it was weak as if the bulk of the energy had been spent in the earlier attack and this was just the remnants. Ella knew, though she couldn't explain how, that it would need to regroup and recharge.

Pulling back the curtain her eye fell on a roll of paper towels that had been left behind in the cleanup. Carefully she set the shards in a towel, she'd find something better to contain them once she was dried off, but it might be possible to use the power signature that remained in the shards to track the creature or possibly create a shield from its powers.

She let the idea bounce around as she washed her hair, rinsing the last of the soap from her body she turned the water off. Taking a towel from the rack dried herself off before she pulled her robe back on, using the towel to wring the worst of the water from her hair. Carefully picking up the mirror fragments she padded down the hall to her bedroom where she found Dean smoothing the blankets in place on her bed. Next to him the sheets that had been on her bed were piled at his feet. The blood rushed to her face in a blush as he picked up the sheets and slipped past her with a wink. After a few moments, she heard the washing machine begin to fill.

Shaking her head, she stepped into her closet and took down the Beauchamp box. Opening it she took a small empty velvet pouch from inside, the containment markings on the bag would keep the power that remained in the mirror pieces from slithering out to contaminate anything else as well as keep it from fading. It would be safe in the box until they needed them again. Replacing the box, she reentered her room to find it still empty. Uncertain of what else to do she sat gingerly on the bed to wait for Dean to come back.

"Thank you," she said when he returned, to find her sitting on the edge of the bed, her words more of a question than a statement. He could see her wince at the uncertainty in her voice. She waited quietly and even though he could see the questions in her eyes, she didn't voice them.

He shrugged nonchalantly in response, his eyes searching hers. Did she want him to stay? He wasn't entirely sure of the protocol at this point, usually he'd be dressed and twirling Baby's keys around his finger while he whistled his way out.

"I can sleep on the couch still…" he offered, but was relieved as she shook her head. She watched him warily as if she was expecting him to bolt at any moment not that he could fault her for that. As he moved toward her, her head lifted to hold his gaze. She continued to hold it as he reached out gently cradling her head in his hands, her eyes finally fluttering shut as he lowered his head to touch his lips to hers.

Pulling back, he searched her face for a moment, his thumbs brushing against her cheeks in a gentle caress as he found he could clearly see her heart in her eyes. Her heart was his if he wanted it. It wasn't the first time he'd seen that look and known what it meant. It was however the first time his gut clenched, not in fear but in an almost primitive need to take care of her. To protect her with every fiber of his being and only the second time he'd heard a voice that gleefully whispered mine. Always mine echoing in his mind.

Everything that had been there when they'd been so young was still there, but it was stronger, it was deeper, it was… more. He couldn't quite utter the words even in his own mind yet, let alone offer them to her but when he kissed her again it was with the emotions he wasn't ready to say.

Laying her back on the bed he stepped out of his jeans and slid in beside her. When he wrapped his arms around her she curled into him. Her back against his chest and her fingers threaded with his own where they lay on her stomach. Rolling he moved her to the other side of the bed before he pulled the covers over them both and curled protectively around her, using his own body to shield her from the door and most of the windows. The significance of this didn't escape Ella. Softy he kissed her temple before he tucked her head under his chin. There was a comfort in holding her and for her in being held, a contentment that faded into sleep.


	25. Chapter 25

It was early when Jessi was awakened by a sliver of sunlight that had made its way through the thin slit between the curtains at the window. With a string of irritable cursing, she rolled to escape its glare only roll right off her bed. Yelping, Jessi's eyes snapped open, it was by sheer instinct alone that allowed her to save herself from the insult of landing face first onto the hardwood floor. For a few moments, she held herself in a plank position as her brain caught up with the rest of her. Grumbling she rolled into a sitting position and leaned her head back against her bed.

While her mind still hadn't fully caught up, the shot of adrenaline released into her bloodstream made it highly unlikely she was going to be able to go back to sleep at this juncture. With little other recourse, she glared at the offending window. How dare it allow sunlight into her room and wake her? For a moment, she contemplated throwing a boot in retribution, but Ella's voice in her head stayed her hand.

'Best case you make a racket, worst case you break the window, not worth it Jessi.'

"I didn't," Jessi protested as though Ella were there to hear her. "See I have maturity, sometimes."

'If only sometimes were all the time.' Ella teased in return.

"Speaking of the devil," Jessi sighed as she pushed herself up to wake Ella only to find the bed vacant.

Her brow furrowed at the realization and surprise, she'd expected Ella to have nightmares that would wake her at some point during the night, or at the very least to find her cousin to have camped out next to her. However, it explained why she'd fallen out of bed. Ella should've been there blocking that edge. It wasn't clumsiness on Jessi's part, it was Ella's fault and that was her story, she was sticking to it.

Uneasiness slipped through her leaving her wondering the reason why Ella hadn't woken her. More than likely it was the combination of a lack of sleep and the pain medication, but Jessi wouldn't be able to settle until she'd checked on her cousin.

Slipping into a pair of comfortable yoga pants and a sweatshirt she twisted her hair up into a messy bun as she crept out her bedroom. Glancing down the hallway she could see the rumpled blankets at the end of the couch. Someone had been restless the night before she mused, it was probably best to continue to move as silently as possible. After all, why wake the grouch on the couch if it wasn't necessary? If Dean wasn't neck deep in a hunt, he tended to be less of a morning person than she was.

Cracking Ella's door, she froze, her eyes darting between the two bodies entwined on the bed, the sight leaving her brain blank. It refused to process the image in front of her, turning she moved down the hallway to check the couch just in case she was losing her mind.

Nope, no Dean, it wasn't just a figment of her imagination. Jessi turned on her heel to head back down the hall to stare into Ella's room as her mind struggling to wrap around what her eyes were seeing. Dean lay on his back while Ella was curled into him, the robe she wore had worked its way loose, but Dean's body covered what was bare, while the sheets and blankets draped around their waists. It was pure luck that brain bleach wouldn't be a necessity.

Sighing Jessi rubbed at her eyes, really she shouldn't be surprised, it wasn't as if they hadn't been dancing around this. What she hadn't expected was either of them to manage to get out of their own way so soon.

"I need coffee before I can even..." She mumbled as she stumbled down the empty hallway toward the kitchen where alluring scent of coffee that was surprisingly wafting toward her. It beckoned her with the promise of the life affirming brew she so urgently needed.

Jessi often forgot they even owned a coffee pot, not that Ella's overly prepared soul would've let her get away without having one. One never knew when there might be guests or something terrible and unforeseen happening, like Madame's coffee shop not opening one morning.

As she poured herself a cup, the sound of her phone ringing had her pausing for a moment. Muttering to herself, she left the coffee and hurried back toward her room. Snatching it off her nightstand she glanced at the display only to groan before she grudgingly answered.

"Uncle Jem."

"You're awake, I'm impressed." Jem's voice was brisk, though with a slight distance that told her he was splitting his focus " Or did you even bother to go to bed?"

"I slept. The damn sun woke me up." She grumbled at him.

"Heaven forbid the sun dare to shine this morning," Jem returned dryly, without waiting for her response he continued. "I've fixed the schedule at the bar today, so you're off until the wedding this evening. You need to get packed since you'll be heading out early tomorrow and Ella could probably use the help with research. Remember, Ma will be here this afternoon. I'll do my best to keep her away from the bar until this evening, but for the love of all that's holy try to lay low today."

"You got my shift covered?"

It was by far the least important part of the conversation, but it was the one she was stuck on. Apparently, the wonders abounded this morning.

"Yes, I'll need you and Ella down here at 5:30 to start set up so use the time you have wisely."

"Sure."

"Tonight, Jessi. Don't be late and don't forget about your grandmother," Jem growled brusquely before he hung up the phone leaving her to stare at the receiver.

"Have I entered an alternate universe?"

Her voice rang with her disbelief and utter confusion. You had to be on your death bed for Jem to consider rearranging the schedule at least Ella and Jessi, the damn thing was practically carved weekly into stone. She couldn't help wondering just exactly how worried he was about this hunt, he'd been confident but here in the eleventh hour he didn't seem quite so certain

"Jesus, I need coffee." Jessi said rubbing the bridge of her nose and tossing the phone on her bed before she made her way back to the kitchen. She found she needed it more now that she had prior to Jem's call, and it'd been a desperate need then.

Picking up the cup she'd left she took a deep drink and began to attempt to process everything that had been thrown at her this morning. The first thing was Ella and Dean. It seemed more than likely her cousin had woken up the night before and Dean had taken care of it. There were little doubts of the feelings on both sides and as much as loved Ella, as much as Jessi's instinct was to protect her, she also loved Dean. He was the big brother she'd never had and quite frankly she'd never wanted, still didn't want some days.

Jessi's stomach growled irritably reminding her that in everything that had happened she'd forgotten to eat dinner. Taking her cup with her she found bacon sitting on the refrigerator shelf just below a carton of eggs.

"Now if only the bacon fairy would wave her magic wand and presto all done," She pouted at the breakfast meat on the fridge shelf. "Unfortunately, the bacon fairy is shacked up with a damn heathen."

Shutting the fridge, she took a few steps to glare down the hallway at Ella's closed door, pouting. When no one appeared at her mental urging, she wrinkled her nose and sighed heavily before she took out the eggs and bacon to start breakfast herself

"Fantastic, I guess I have to be the freaking bacon fairy, oh how the mighty have fallen," Jessi muttered as she turned the oven on and rummaged through the cabinets for a baking sheet. Laying out the strips of bacon as she waited for the oven to heat. Finishing she washed her hands and popped the pan into the oven before returning to the fridge. Finding strawberries, raspberries and blackberries she took them out and set about cleaning them for a fresh berry salad.

Ella drifted into consciousness, the feeling of comfort and warmth that made her want to burrow further in and drift off again. That was unusual, while she wouldn't call herself a morning person by any means, once she woke that was it, there was no hoping of going back to sleep.

Little thoughts would begin from the moment her alarm went off, or the morning began to filter brightly into her room. Random reminders popping up reminding her that she would need to be to class soon, or she was opening downstairs, or there was inventory to do, or a thousand other things she had to take care of. Her mind might start sluggishly, but the never-ending list of what she needed to handle often couldn't wait. It's what coffee had been discovered for.

It was a testament to her exhaustion and comfort level that those little zinging reminders were slow to start. Her first actual thought wasn't of how she needed to get out of bed and get started on her day, instead it was an abstract thought of how comfortable her pillow was. When she moved the hand that lay next to her face she found it was smooth, firm, and there was a warmth radiating from it rather than an echo of her own body temperature.

Still, she was so warm and comfortable… and sore. Stretching she found her body pressing against a hard surface, her body tensed as her eyes blinked open to find she was laying on a muscular chest. Her head tilted up to find the lines of worry and unease that so often creased his face had been smoothed away with sleep leaving him looking calm, almost peaceful.

When she tried to slip away, his arms only tightened, with a frustrated sigh she tried again, but he was too strong.

"Dean, let go," she grumbled drilling her finger in a sensitive spot on his side, he grunted but didn't release her. The smile that ghosted across his face so quickly she almost missed it told her he wasn't any more asleep than she was. More than likely he'd woken the moment she'd tensed; his instincts were too sharp not to.

"Dean," she hissed drilling him again.

"Don't wanna get up," he mumbled his eyes slitting open, the green with its rings of brown so clear this morning, his lips turned up in a smirk. A metallic clattering from the general direction of the kitchen had both of them tensing, but the rather impressive string of curses that followed told them it was Jessi.

"Shit, Jessi's already up, what time is it?" Ella demanded as she glanced at her clock. To her surprised to find it still relatively early, she was even more surprised at the faint scent that drifted from the kitchen.

"Is that bacon I smell?" Dean asked curiously, cocking an eyebrow at her. "Wait, if you're here who in the hell is cooking."

"Jessi," Ella replied as she stood and straightened her robe before she tightened the belt around her waist.

"Jessi? How sure are you it's your cousin in kitchen and how sure are you that a shape shifter hasn't taken her place, or maybe she's been possessed?"

"Pretty sure," Ella chuckled, her eyes sparkling with amusement. "I could see how you might be confused, but she's actually an excellent cook. Nana, Aunt Charlotte, and Aunt Ellen wouldn't have let us get away without learning how to cook and do it well. Still, she doesn't love it, not like I do and in order to be really good you have to love it. It's the only thing that makes me a better. now and then she gets a wild hair apparently, this morning is one of them. Though it's just as likely she's trying to bribe me."

"For what?"

"Let's go see shall we."

He groaned and pulled the pillow over his head.

"Come on Dean," Ella laughed tugging the blankets away. "We'll have to face her sooner than later." His reply was too muffled but from his tone she guessed he was arguing. "Fine, I'll go by myself, some big brave Hunter you are afraid of a tiny woman."

"Tiny she may be, but she's got a tongue like a viper," she heard him call as she left him in the bedroom and headed for the kitchen.

Jessi glanced up from where she was cutting berries. Ella only raised an eyebrow in response to her cousin's questioning expression.

"You're awfully cheerful this morning," Jessi said carefully as she took down a mug and filled a cup that she left black before taking down a second.

"Perhaps," was all Ella replied with a shrug. Glancing back at her cousin, Jessi could see the twinkle in her eyes. She continued to watch her cousin for a moment as Ella mixed cream into her coffee.

"I told you if you got laid it'd do wonders for you."

Ella shrugged off Jessi's dig as she took a drink of her coffee choosing to ignore it all together.

"I'm not complaining mind you, but I have to ask, where did this windfall come from?"

She asked instead gesturing to the bowl her cousin was whipping scrambled eggs in. Jessi offered a shrug of her own before she answered.

"Jem gave me the day off and we need fuel, there's research that needs to be done despite the fact you've been fraternizing with the hired muscle."

"When was I hired?"

Both girls spared a glance for Dean as he looked between the two of them expectantly.

"I'm not getting paid here, what I do, I do out of the goodness of my heart."

"Ella pays you, from the happy little smile on your face while you slept this morning told me you've been paid well."

"Hey," Ella snapped. "I'm not a prostitute, I'm not paying for protection by favors in the bedroom."

"Why not? There are certainly wives that do more for less," Jessi shrugged.

"Good grief Jessi," was all Ella said as she let her head drop into her hands unable to even begin to articulate a retort to that. Nearly as quickly as her head hit her hands, it snapped back up again. "Wait, Jem gave you the day off?"

"The miracles today never cease, you got laid, which I hope will put you and sweet cheeks over there in a significantly better mood and I got the morning off to do research as well as prep for the hunt. Let's be real though, you'll be doing the research and I'll be making breakfast, it's the lesser of the two evils. Why don't you two hit the showers?"

"I took one last night," Ella replied lightly snagging a piece of bacon from the pan that Jessi had only just pulled from the oven. Tossing it from hand to hand to cool it she continued. "Dean's up, but I'll get dressed and start looking through the file Jem gave us."

Dean nodded agreeably and snagged his own bacon before disappearing down the hallway. Glancing at Ella, Jessi could see the fear and longing that crossed her cousin's face as she watched until they both heard the bathroom door shut. Without even reaching for her powers Jessi knew the maelstrom of emotion that was churning in Ella's gut.

"It isn't like the other girls Ella, it never has been," Jessi told her, running her hand up Ella's arm and squeezing her comfortingly. "I get it, he doesn't at all seem like the settling down kind and that's terrifying. You're telling yourself not to get too attached even while your heart's so caught up that you know it'll never be the same if it ends, and you know he has the power to break you. I'm not going to lie he has a love 'em and leave 'em rep, but what you see on the surface isn't all there is to Dean."

"I get that Jessi, I do, but I can't hope for too much here."

"You're telling yourself that you can't expect him to stay when everything's over." Jessi cut her off. "You're telling yourself that you can only enjoy what he can give you while he can give it…"

Ella held her eye for a moment as she trailed off before she glanced away, her expression confirming Jessi was right.

"I remember what you don't and what I wasn't there for I've seen in your dreams. He loved you Ella with everything that he had at seventeen," as Ella opened her mouth to argue Jessi held up her hand.

"At seventeen one can love deeply but not fully and sometimes you meet your soul mate that young. Are you soul mates, I don't know, but I do know he left Sammy in the kitchen that day to protect you. His whole life, his one mission was to take care of Sam and the moment he heard the terror in your voice he bolted up those stairs without even a seconds thought. When the dust settled, he split his time between your room and Sam's, torn between his love for both of you and his fear that he'd lose you both."

"That was years ago Jessi and we were young. It's only been a few days I can't realistically expect him to profess his undying love here."

"You and Dean aren't most people," Jessi argued, her voice sharp. Ella's lips thinned in irritation at her refusal to let it go, but Jessi plowed on. "I was there the day you looked at him and you didn't know him."

"I know, I remembered that much."

"Did you see his heart tear in two, did you see the light die out of his eyes, did you see the devastation? He's not exactly the type to admit it, even now, but trust me it wasn't merely a passing teenage infatuation. When I called him, and asked him to come out here, I was fairly certain that he'd turn me down, not that I was going to take no for an answer mind you. I couldn't take you struggling anymore, I could see pieces of you trying to break free of the spell and nothing I'd done had helped. Call me a hopeless romantic, but he came here. Do you understand what that means?"

"You're going to tell me one way or another, whether I want to hear it or not," Ella said wryly shrugging her shoulders as if it didn't matter to her one way or another. Not that Jessi was fooled by her nonchalance.

"You are the only girl that has broken his heart, the only girl I think he has ever really loved. Despite that he came here to help you. He planned on leaving that first night, but he stayed when he realized you were in danger, he's had his heart battered by the memories he's been forced to relive with you. A lesser man would've bailed at the beginning and few would blame him. I just want you to see him Ella, really see him, because he's damn good at making it look shallow beneath that surface, but it isn't."

"I know Jessi," Ella reached out and squeezed Jessi's hand, their gaze met and held for a moment before Jessi turned back to the eggs. "I'm beginning to wonder who's going to be more disappointed if this doesn't work out, Dean and I or you."

"If this doesn't work out I'll be pissed, I'm pretty sure it'll be because both of you are being dumbasses."

"It doesn't take an empath to know that once the heart gets involved, it all comes out in dumbass with more regularity than normal," Ella chuckled picking up her cup, Jessi just snorted in response as Ella headed for her room to get dressed and the folder Jem had given them the night before.


End file.
